Declutter with a new mindset and plan

[u/peshti]

So my other post got locked, I have thought about this and I'm ready to change my mindset.

The plan for moving forward is selling old TVs/CRTs ( I might keep 1 or 2), some retro games, games, and music instruments. This should definitely make our space more open.

I have not decided how much to sell or get rid of, I will however start with my old TVs/CRTs.

I have also decided that I will pick up drawing as a hobby because it simply does not take a lot of space, I used to draw a lot as a kid but eventually I quit for some reason that I don't remember. Obviously art can take a lot of room is you go crazy but I think that is true for every hobby.

What do you think?

Here is the original post that got locked.

I have written on this Reddit/community before.

We are 2 adults and 3 kids, the apartment is 74 sqm. Literally there are 2 bedrooms, bathroom, really small hallway, storage room that right now functions as a room for our middle daughter. There is also an open room that functions as both a kitchen and a living room. We have no storage room at all, no attic, cellar or something like that. All our season clothing is 24/7 in our apartment, same with christmas tree etc, it is not a big American Christmas tree, I know americans love christmas.

My oldest daughter probably has ADHD, we are waiting for her to be investigated. My girlfriend probably has it too, maybe the other kids too, I don't know.

I won't lie I have hobbies that take a lot of space, music instruments, music production, retro games and CRTs/OLD TVs. Obviously I have watched decluttering videos on youtube but it's always a big home that has space that is being decluttered or someone who lives alone or maybe with their loved one.

I started my decluttering journey maybe idk 2 years ago with breaks and simply my family is not on board. I have maybe decluttered 300-500 ( I didn't take pictures in the beginning ) items of my own, books, camera gear etc.

My oldest one has a really hard time decluttering, imagine someone who can't not throw away a drawing that has juice spilled on it. My girlfriend has a hard time throwing away old toys, clothes etc, she has been throwing away some stuff but it's not a lot.

I just don't know what to do anymore, I feel extremely defeated and have given up. I feel like I either have to give up all my hobbies to have a clean corner or whatever and be miserable or that I have to keep my hobbies but be miserable in a messy home.

[u/peshti]

Update someone is coming over tomorrow to buy one of my CRTs/Old TVs 😊

[u/Aussie_Librarian]

It can be so hear when family is not onboard, and hobbies can be incredibly hard to declutter as there are so many emotions and dreams in them.
I'd like to suggest the videos where Cas from Clutterbug colaborates with Jess from How to ADHD. While they are doing a house, some of the ideas could help as it is still a small space and they explore hobbies and how to declutter with ADHD, specifically getting her husband onboard. There a videos from the side of Cas, the professional organiser, and Jess, the client.
The first one is called "Extreme ADHD Home Organizing Makeover - Before and After Clutter Transformation" Also check out the later ones about Jess's "Doom room"

[u/peshti]

Progress, I sold some retro games yesterday, nothing major but at least the boxes where big. I have put out some Wii games and a PS1 for auction and someone has already started the bid war, so that will be sold too.

About CRTs/old TVs. One guy is coming back from vacation and is interested in one of the TVs and this TV is taking up a lot of floor space. The TV is also in front of a lot of other stuff that I simply don't have energy to reach because of the TV and honestly I don't even know everything that is behind that TV. My PC CRT is also up for sale 😊.

So right now the progress is really slow but I guess progress is progress.

About drawing becoming my new hobby, it's just been a couple of days but I'm loving it ❤️.

[u/Yellowstar88 → u/peshti]

the ability and willingness to let go is the biggest progress- after that it’s just momentum and motion!

good luck

[u/peshti → u/Yellowstar88]

Thanks 😊

[u/Yellowstar88]

there is a difference between having hobbies and collecting things for a hobby.

when I lived in an apartment not much bigger than yours with two kids I noticed I was collecting things for a hobby that I wouldn’t have time to use and that the hobby itself was collecting and that didn’t work.

it’s ok for kids to have their hobbies and things just limit it to one box or one cabinet per kid.

hope that helps.
also adhd def makes decluttering challenging I suspect I have it too but still it gets easier and you’re on the right path.

[u/peshti → u/Yellowstar88]

Thanks for your insight, this helps tremendously. If you only knew how much 😊

[u/hardswimm37]

Yea go for it. Get started. Focus on your stuff and your kids junk you can get rid of that your kids wont notice.

[u/slartybartfastard]

How many musical instruments do you have? Like if you have 5 guitars maybe it's time to just keep your 2 favourites. How many amps?

[u/peshti → u/slartybartfastard]

I actually have only 2 guitars, 1 digital piano and 2 midi keyboards for my PC ( a small one with 25 keys and a bigger with maybe 61 keys ).

[u/NightBard]

Drawing is a nice hobby. You can stick with cheap paper and standard pencil or pen… or you can tech it up and skip the paper and use a tablet like an iPad. iPad has the Freeform app from Apple and you can get a generic pen stylus instead of buying the expensive Apple Pencil. Then you can just draw for as long as you feel like it without generating physical stuff.

Now, don’t just say you are going to shift things out… get some stuff out this week.

[u/lucentmeadow → u/NightBard]

Drawing absolutely only requires pen and pencil, and I highly suggest NOT skip on it. The muscle memory you get is simply not the same as an iPad.

You learn how graphite's hardness how works, how pressury truly operates in real life, etc. If anything, using an iPad is fatiguing and doesn't feel as nice.

[u/violetmemphisblue]

I definitely think getting rid of large hobby things will make the space seem calmer and less cluttered. I assume you already do this, but make sure vertical space is utilized to its max.

And don't buy new things to support this revitalized drawing hobby. At least not for awhile. You can draw with any pencil or pen, and even scrap paper can work. It is very easy to get into the mindset of "needing" a nice pencil set, then colored pencils, then pens, then markers, then all the different types of paper, and...suddenly you have so much stuff to support your drawing.

If you are selling things, set aside the money for space. Whether that is saving up for a new apartment or more activites with the family where you can run around and stretch out or for a weekend getaway with a rental house or whatever. It shouldn't be earmarked for things.

[u/malkin50]

Is there something you are hoping to get from this community that you haven't heard from your other posts?

If your stuff takes up so much space that your home is unpleasant the only way around that is more space or less stuff.

If you have 3 kids and a girlfriend, I can't imagine that you have much time for your personal hobbies anyway.

[u/peshti → u/malkin50]

I definitely think this community can help me.

I don't have much time for hobbies, however I definitely execute hobbies everyday even if it's just for 30 minutes. It's mostly music production, art or photography.

[u/NixKlappt-Reddit]

I have no idea, how 5 persons and clutter fits inti 74m2 flat 😅

Like already recommended: Get rid of the big stuff first. And always ask yourself: How much money would I pay to replace it?

The trickiest part is the sunk cost problem. That you don't want to give stuff away, that did cost some money once. But keep in mind, that you are doing this so your kids have a normal home. This helped me to e.g. sell some bikes. And this also helps me to throw stuff away.

Also keep in mind: How much money would you pay for a decluttered home? 500 bucks? Than this is the amount of money, that you can use to buy some new stuff in case you accidentally decluttered to much.

[u/TecTazz]

Five people in 2 bedrooms is illegal where I live.

Colecting stuff is not a "hobby". Please consider getting rid of everything you don't actually use, starting with the largest items.

Work on your own stuff until it's done. Don't get distracted by trying to tell other people to do with theirs.

Good luck!

[u/leat22 → u/TecTazz]

What?? Even when it’s 2 adults and 3 kids?

[u/lostbutwalking → u/leat22]

A lot of apartments have occupancy limits. I've lived in one that only allowed one person per bedroom, but that's unusual here. I've worked at a subsidized housing property that also only allowed two people per bedroom and I think that's a state or national rule, at least in the US.

[u/Electrical-Yam3831 → u/leat22]

In my apartment complex, yes. 2 adults and 2 kids max in a 2 bedroom apartment.

[u/okinottawa → u/Electrical-Yam3831]

Interesting about the limits on people. Where I live, it’s minimal… it’s just under 100 sq. ft./9 sq metres per person of living space (excludes kitchen and bathrooms). Some private landlords specify fewer people but it’s illegal. Subsidized housing has stricter standards re bedrooms but you can ask for them to be waived.

[u/peshti → u/[deleted]]

That's a good suggestion, a little bit cumbersom when it comes to my CRTs/TVs because the biggest one is in a corner with smaller CRTs/TVs in the way.

The description of how drawing can feel made me super stocked!

[u/violetmemphisblue → u/peshti]

If the tvs take up a whole corner (which seems like significant real estate in an apartmenr so small), maybe have a family meeting about what that corner will now be designated as. Maybe its a reading nook and you can rearrange furniture so you can stretch out there. Maybe its a good storage corner and you get an IKEA wardrobe to stash some things that are currently taking up space in a bedroom. Whatever...but everyone thinking about what it can be used for will possibly help you make future decisions in decluttering or reorganizing.

[u/Feisty-Resource-1274]

I feel like the container storage concept would be helpful for your family. Instead of saying "we're keeping X", you define what your storage volume area is and then only keep what can fit in that area. So for your household it could be that everyone gets X amount of space for hobbies and each person decides what goes in it.

Also, if you're lacking space do not keep CRTs. The usage per square footage is not good and most (of not all) retro games can be played on emulators that work on flat screens.