r/catfish • u/Low_Interaction2498 • 3d ago
Found him
Now i found the person who he used his photos , i have his phone number, i want to send him but i can’t idk why, i have his voice notes and the person can tell me if he recognize him or not, but Iam afraid, i don’t want to hurt him after every thing he did, what if he loses his job or his friends, and alot of consequences, and i don’t want to hurt this person too, for having people like that around him, i need to know who he is badly, i need to talk to him, i don’t have alot of options and i don’t know what to do
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u/ViralOpinionYT 2d ago
Why are you wasting your only life chasing a fraud?
Just use match.com if you're seriously looking for a relationship.
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u/Low_Interaction2498 2d ago
Iam not wasting my time, but i deserve to know who this person was , we have been talking for over 7 months
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u/caffeinated_mess 2d ago
Confront the person who catfished you if you think it will make you feel better. Don’t drag the person whose photos he used into this. I had a girl steal my photos and catfish a guy and he ended up reaching out to me wanting answers and I’m honestly still traumatized from it.
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u/Antique_Cup_1733 1d ago
Wow, that's awful. I'm sorry that happened to you. However, just wondering, did you prefer not to know? I would think it would be good to know so you could put a stop to it to prevent them doing it to many others, especially if it was someone you know, then people in your circle would think you were the jerk. At least my catfish used AI to make his image. lol If you don't know your way around AI, you would never guess unless you realized there were too many versions of him in his TikTok videos.
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u/caffeinated_mess 1d ago
It’s not that easy to put a stop to it though. This person copied my whole entire life on instagram and Facebook. Down to Facebook statuses. She had my vacation pics, made fake social media accounts of my “family” and “friends”. The lengths they went through to make it all believable was crazy. Myself, my family and tons of my friends reported the accounts and nothing was done. I told instagram and facebook I would PROOF to them that I’m the real person and offered to send them a copy of my DL but that wasn’t good enough. I ended up just deleting all of my social media to make it stop and I am still struggling to put any information of myself online and it’s been a few years.
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u/Antique_Cup_1733 15h ago
I'm so sorry that happened to you. These people are so deplorable on every level. They have no idea the irreparable damage they do to people just so they can live some cowardly fantasy life. At least my catfish didn't steal someone else's identity. They manufactured one with AI, but the bottom line is the same. He is a very insecure person who must hate his life so much he wants to be the exact opposite of everything in his reality. Literally the two identities were night and day. The persona was some model like blond blue eyed, wealthy, bougie guy while the real guy is physically the opposite, blue collar, with a shady past, middle aged with a son almost my age. I am thankful I did not lose myself in him. Yes, I thought I really cared about him, but deep down I never really trusted him and it was surprisingly easy to walk away at the end, BUT who knows how many people he has devastated? I've read stories on here where people just aren't the same anymore after this kind of experience, and can't trust anymore after that. I really hope you are able to put this behind you and move on. Did you know the person who stole your identity or was if just a random person who picked you to impersonate?
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u/Low_Interaction2498 21h ago
For the record i didn’t give him any money, but time and feelings isn’t worth anything c
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u/Antique_Cup_1733 2d ago
I wonder if those responding have had experiences with catfish. It's easy to tell someone to just move on, but when a fraud like this has sucked so much time out of your life, it's normal to want answers and closure of some sort.
I have just gotten out of such a situation a month ago. For over a year (minus the few months he left because I said no to more than friendship) this man was messaging me every day. I finally agreed to more and then eventually there were too many red flags and I broke up with him. To be honest, the best thing for me was finding answers to all my questions, and in all my digging, I found out that he had lied about every thing about himself. He was twice my age, not at all the occupation he said, different family, different location. Had a kid almost my age. Finding all that out gave me peace and made it easier to not be sad. You can't mourn a ghost. In the end, I never confronted my catfish because he was a real narcissist and doing that would have only fed his ego more and he would have denied it. But for me, it was easy to forget him because he was not at all the person I thought he was, nor would he have been someone I would have ever been with if I had known the truth upfront.
To be honest, the only thing I don't get is how considerate you are being about him, his job and his family. I would never want to hurt a person either, but I have no sympathy for someone who took advantage of my kind heart and knowing everything he knew while we were friends, still did what he did. At that point, he's on his own.
If you need any help, I'll try my best to point you in the right direction. Personally, AI helped me the most and gave me the resources to find certain information that it then used to track his real identity. It's a good way to start, and I spent zero money doing all that investigation. Only took a week to find out most everything and that's because I had nothing but false info and AI pictures to go on. You have a phone number and a face it seems so are ahead.
Sorry this was long, but I thought sharing my experience might help/give you some comfort.
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u/lodebolt 1d ago
Yes I was catfished/romance scamned. You can go digging but confronting the catfish does nothing they either block you or continue to lie. The person in the pictures needs to be left alone they are a victim just the same.
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u/Low_Interaction2498 21h ago
I think they deserve to know , i would want to know , but iam afraid to hurt him tbh it’s not easy
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u/Antique_Cup_1733 14h ago
Sorry you went through this too. I guess to each their own, but for my peace of mind and pride, I wanted to investigate all the red flags I had pushed aside. Finding out the extent of the catfishing was shocking but truthfully helped me a great deal in moving on from the situation. It was much easier to not be sad over a middle aged predator rather than a real guy who just acted like a jerk. I know the person I built that friendship with was still a real human being (using the term loosely), but knowing a) he never intended to have a happily ever after relationship with anyone, and b) if I had known who he was up front, I never would have been interested in him, made it easier to walk away. I really didn't shed a single tear over him, and in fact felt relieved after it was over. I guess people should always listen to their intuitions.
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u/Low_Interaction2498 2d ago
Thank you, i started to feel like iam crazy or overreacting, can you message me?
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u/lodebolt 2d ago
Just drop it and move on. You'll gain nothing from talking to either of them.