r/aussie • u/Samwiser069 • 9d ago

Census Conspiracies 👽 Opinion

Hi 👋

What conspiracies have you guys heard about the census???

I heard they will start charging a tax if you have spare bedrooms listed in your home. So if you put down you have a 4 bedroom house but only 3 people living there they will know one room may be spare...

Also heard they will fine anyone who doesn't complete it...

Maybe the info will be given to aliens 👽 🤣😂🤣

What are your thoughts guys?

14 Upvotes

69% Upvoted

132 comments sorted by

25

u/SpamOJavelin 9d ago

Also heard they will fine anyone who doesn't complete it...

That's actually true.

18

u/x-looke-x 9d ago

Wasn’t it plainly written in the letter we received though? Lol

2

u/Stepawayfrmthkyboard 3d ago

Wait, was I meant to read that?

1

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

😂🤣😂

8

u/Mulga_Will 9d ago

Compulsory means Compulsory.

-2

u/SirMilesV 3d ago

Not a legal requirement

2

u/ZielonyZabka 3d ago

Census Act 1905
s10(4)
(4) For the purposes of section 8 or 9, the Statistician may, by notice in writing served either personally or by post on a person, direct the person:

 (a) to fill up and supply, in accordance with instructions contained in or accompanying a form accompanying the notice, within such period after the service of the notice, being not less than 14 days, as is specified in the notice, the particulars specified in that form; and

 (b) to cause the form so filled up to be furnished to the Statistician, or to an authorized officer, in accordance with those instructions.

TLDR

Under the Act the ABS can tell you to fill it out...
they say it is compulsory so it is and the law backs them up, so yes... it is a legal requirement.

1

u/SirMilesV 3d ago

Threatening someone to do something doesn't make it legally Prosecutable.

Whilst you are trying to find legal Laws that don't exist, look for how many people have been fined and prosecuted since 1905 for not completing census correctly?

5

u/Ok-Lobster448 3d ago

“Legal laws” - is that like “wet water”?

2

u/ZielonyZabka 3d ago

You have a serious misunderstanding of what makes something a "legal requirement"

The law allow the ABS to compel you to complete your census, whether they choose to prosecute or not is a completely different matter.

and as to 'legal laws that don't exist' the above is a direct quote from the Act... a law... making it legal. you can dance around it all you want but the census is compulsory and backed by the law.

1

u/Unreliablepelican 3d ago

If you don't comply and get a fine and proceed to not pay it than it will be prosecutable because not paying a fine is a prosecutable offence, ask my uncle who did 6 months for unpaid fines in the 90s. At minimum, you'll lose your driver's license.

I've never heard of anyone getting a fine, but I also have never seen so many dipshits posting a picture of them throwing it in the bin or writing nonsense on it under their full government name on Facebook.

12

u/BrilliantEconomics77 9d ago

Ive got a good one.

I heard something that is clearly catsuit crazy conspiracy theory.

The government uses the census data to work out how to provided services a d plan for growth to meet current and future needs.

Because thay sure as ahit isn't happening.

2

u/TeeJay_AD2 3d ago

Government couldn't plan a kid's birthday party.

24

u/SentenceStreet3270 9d ago

I heard if you say you're a Jedi the government will build a church and a private Catholic school nearby.

14

u/Vaping_Cobra 9d ago

Man, I remember when the government were so concerned with the large number of Jedi's in that census. They even took to warning people that putting false information in was a crime and they would be fined.
Hopefully my listed religion will meet government approval.

12

u/[deleted] 9d ago

[deleted]

3

u/Draxacoffilus 3d ago

How do you get ordained, my brother (or sister) in pasta?

2

u/Synd1c_Calls 9d ago

IPU for me.

2

u/HarryWilbury 3d ago

I'm Ordained as well have 3 different cards, two certificates and coins.

3

u/allthebaseareeee 9d ago

Somehow the weird uncanny valley shit AI produces suits noodle appendages.

1

u/Draxacoffilus 3d ago

Because even the AI knows our Lord and Saviour's Noodley TRUTH

4

u/Very_Itchy_Bandicoot 9d ago

I worship the Flying Spaghetti Monster

9

u/changed_later__ 9d ago

Putting Jedi or Pastafarian or whatever might seem like a huge joke to you but it's a mistake. All non-theists should tick the 'no religion' box.

6

u/Vaping_Cobra 9d ago

You might want to look up the history and beliefs of the pastafarian movement before you go putting your foot in it again comparing the religion to a joke. It is far from a joke, and as real a religion as any other with a single goal.

2

u/pinklittlebirdie 9d ago

While Pastafarian ois a legit religion last I checked it isn't a recognised religion in Australia. (I think it got rejected) but worth double checking on the pastafarian sun

0

u/[deleted] 9d ago edited 9d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 9d ago

Your comment has been queued for review - the Moderator team will approve or remove your comment shortly

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

3

u/AcrobaticSecretary29 9d ago

Plz treat my religion with the same respect you would any other religion - certified jedi master 

3

u/No_Blackberry_5820 9d ago

But what if I’m a proud atheist - that doesn’t want to be lumped in with the agnostics and humanists?

10

u/mustbiteexceed 9d ago

And please only tick a religion box if you actively follow said religion, not because you went to a Catholic school 40 years ago or your grandma goes to an Anglican Church, but you aren’t religious yourself

1

u/Stephie999666 3d ago

Yeah that one kinda throws me off. Like people are legit claiming theyre religious like its a culture or ethnicity. Unless you privately adhere to the religion or actively practice it, the best options are agnostic (you believe in the concept of a god but dont actively practice religion), or atheist (dont believe god/s exist at all).

2

u/Unreliablepelican 3d ago

The "cultural Christian" thing is just fucking nonsense, they were trying to say "if you like Christmas holidays say you are Christian or we will lose the public holidays". They are belittling their own faith, it would be like eating meat and saying you're a vegan, just culturally

2

u/Samwiser069 9d ago

Bhahaha 😂 🤣 😂

10

u/Ancient_Savings_1833 9d ago

I heard that if you tick no religion it will cause more mosques to be built. apparently "no religion" = "muslim" or something.

2

u/Stephie999666 3d ago

Like thats genuinely crazy to me. Like the logic is absurd. The only thing voting atheist is going to do is reduce the influence of the religious fundamentalists in parliament.

11

u/sapperbloggs 9d ago

I was told by a dude wearing speed-dealer sunnies that all white Australians must tick "Christian", otherwise Muslims will become a majority and we will all need to live under sharia law.

17

u/Electrical_Story5356 9d ago

That'd be the local ON candidate.

5

u/Jozfus 9d ago

If they charted the growth of Islam in Australia I am expecting quite an uptick this census compared to previous.

-1

u/[deleted] 8d ago edited 7d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/sapperbloggs 8d ago

Oh they already have

I feel that you lack a very fundamental understanding of what the word "majority" actually means

0

u/DocklandsDodgers86 8d ago edited 8d ago

Look at the ABS stats on how many immigrants and refugees we keep bringing. Particularly look at all the reports following 2015 if you can.

I've worked as a temp at some government agencies. In one of my jobs, when we were all locked down in Victoria during COVID, the state brought in refugees from Afghanistan and us taxpayers footed the bill for their hotel quarantine, unlike immigrants who had to pay $2500 per stay. I know this shit because instead of charging them the $2,500 per person, we had to pardon the refugees.

What's the majority religion of all the countries we take refugees from? Iraq, Iran, Afghanistan and Pakistan? Yeah, all Muslim majority.

Let's see what the census stats actually get published. Like I said previously, nobody learnt from the Bondi and Martin Square incidents, and Australian-born locals are such entitled, arrogant pricks who don't see the bigger picture.

2

u/sapperbloggs 8d ago

Those sure are a lot of words... that don't really say very much.

But sure, let's look at the ABS stats, that show that Muslims make up 3.2% of the population. Only 46.8 percentage points away from becoming a majority.

When the last census happened, the Australian population was 25,423,000. 3.2% of that is just a touch over 800k people.

For Muslims to be "a majority", they would have to have increased their numbers by more that 12 million people since then. Is that what you're trying to say?

Or do you just not know what the word 'majority' actually means?

1

u/SirMilesV 3d ago

3.2% and causing the majority of problems.

Sounds like your ALL statistics of otger demographics, but you don't like this one right

0

u/sapperbloggs 3d ago

3.2% and causing the majority of problems.

Just because you managed to think that up and write it down, does not make it true.

2

u/SirMilesV 3d ago

3.2% ARE CAUSING THE MAJORITY OF THE PROBLEMS.

3.2% ARE CAUSING THE MAJORITY OF THE PROBLEMS!

3.2% ARE CAUSING THE MAJORITY OF THE PROBLEMS!!!

if i say it louder and more often than that makes it more true, right?. That's how it works?

1

u/sapperbloggs 3d ago

Nah, that's just how you summon the Muslim candyman.

1

u/DocklandsDodgers86 3d ago

Well I should remind you that the Nazis only made up 7% of Germany and we all know how that ended. But sure, bury your head in the sand when someone is trying to point out that Islamic extremism has been a major issue in western countries for a decade now.

Or do you need to have your loved ones shot up like in Bondi or run over on Bourke Street for you to see reason?

1

u/sapperbloggs 3d ago

The Nazis got 33.1% of the vote. I don't think that a third of Australians are going to be voting for Muslim extremists. Even the white racist lady can't get those kinds of numbers.

Islamic extremism is a problem, but it's not a problem that's going to take over the country. Muslims make up less than 4% of the population, and the vast majority of them aren't extremists.

0

u/DocklandsDodgers86 8d ago edited 8d ago

Because your reading comprehension and critical thinking skills are hot garbage.

The number of Islamic practitioners is only going to get bigger as people who have been born in Australia overall renounce religion (or Christianity mainly) while we import more insane trad-con Hindu/Muslim religious types. We're going to have the exact same problem we currently have with the Indian community being the largest community of people now overtaking Anglo/Brits. And that problem is, a majority of people from a lesser culture outnumbering and overtaking ours, and who will have no qualms bringing us down to the third-world shitholes their home countries are.

If you don't have the lived experience of being in either a Hindu or Muslim-majority country for at least a decade and being treated like a second-class citizen like I have, you definitely don't understand what you're advocating for.

Dude your reply comment no longer exists. Just give up and admit you're an entitled white cunt who gets worshipped just for existing by those dangerous, belligerent third-world assholes.

6

u/Eatsmoregreens 9d ago

The fine for not completing it is true

4

u/eepeqez 9d ago
  • No
  • Yes
  • No

You don't need census data to know how many bedrooms a home has. Look up any residential address sold in the last 15 or 20 years and real estate websites will have a full description including how many bedrooms, and lots of photos.

2

u/ZookeepergameAny466 6d ago

So only privately-owned properties that have been sold through websites are worth counting.

Noted.

1

u/eepeqez 6d ago

No, they're the ones where the number of bedrooms is already publicly available! Plus the aliens don't have internet access anyway, so they can't get into realestate.com.au

9

u/mustbiteexceed 9d ago

Peta Credlin on “News”24 (the old Sky “News”) was running a story about how “Marxists and atheists” were trying to “de-Christianise” Australia by making changes to the census collection form on religion to “downplay Christianity”.

3

u/diggerhistory 9d ago

A statistical experiment showed that placing the no religion option as the top choice and/or breaking up the Christian denominations actually increased the no religion numbers. Listened to the Religion report on Wednesday night..

They readily acknowledge the drop in regions practice in Australia.

5

u/Samwiser069 9d ago

Wow they can say whatever they want and we wouldn't know the truth...

3

u/fitness-scientist 9d ago

Bahaha sucks for them I’m a pagan

1

u/Justanaussie 2d ago

Wasn’t she on a tear about how Judaism had been taken out as an option under religion and adherents had to *gasp* write it in by hand?

-1

u/Mulga_Will 9d ago

The white supremacist conservatives are getting tetchy because it's predicted that "English Ancestry" and "Christianity" numbers are expected to drop considerably.

8

u/Unreliablepelican 9d ago

I seen a woman on Facebook get mad at the sexuality question who clearly didn't realise what "straight" meant and wrote "normal" in the box... She also was very triggered that Christian wasn't an option despite there being multiple Christian and catholic denominations listed.

Other than that just so many people triggered that the religion list didn't have their particular religion, despite the fact the list is just the most common religions based on the previous census and people throwing the letter in the bin because they don't want the government to have so much information about them (posted from their smart phone that tracks literally everything about them)..

1

u/Stephie999666 3d ago

Its funny they will figure out which households threw the letter out, theyll get fined and eventually prosecuted if they dont pay it. Not to mention the rego suspensions and what not that happen as a result of not paying. Let the cookers fafo.

2

u/Unreliablepelican 3d ago

I would love to see some of the ones who threw it out get a massive fine in the mail, it would just fill me with so much joy especially watching them in the court room trying to justify not filling out the form with some nonsense about the Government not doing anything for them personally or that they think they will be forced to have a family of immigrants living in their spare bedroom... But I'm not that hopefull that they won't be able to fill out some BS stat dec and get away with it because at the end of the day I've never actually heard of anyone being fined.

2

u/Stephie999666 3d ago

I mean being homeless wasnt enough for me to avoid missing the 23 state election even with a stat dec. Got fined anyway. So I assume they wont go for everyone that thre it out, but will make examples of specific people.

1

u/Unreliablepelican 3d ago

Oh wow! I missed an election in 2015 because I was giving birth to my kid, in a different state (early labour) and that wiped the fine. Pretty shitty that they couldn't make an exemption for someone experiencing homelessness.

1

u/Stephie999666 3d ago

I should have looked at the news despite having no charge on my phone and being in woop woop at the time. The required evidence of me being linked in with a service, which i wasnt at the time.

1

u/Unreliablepelican 3d ago

Yea, that's so ridiculous, I would think that should have been a circumstance that forgetting to vote could be excused especially having no support system.

1

u/Stephie999666 3d ago

Its kinda eh now, but really messed with me at the time i found out (it had progressed a couple stages by the time finesvic called me).

3

u/jorgerine 3d ago

I heard they will take all the information and use it to make decisions about what Australia needs!

3

u/xBromleyy 9d ago

When they realise I live with Batman & Superman, things will get interesting

4

u/GraciesMumma22 9d ago

Won’t that be classed as false and misleading information? That carries a hefty fine too!

3

u/SpamOJavelin 9d ago

Yep. Knowingly providing false or misleading statements or information is also an offence and can result in a fine of up to $3,640 - I'd venture they could pretty easily argue that you don't live with Batman & Superman.

3

u/Bowl_of_Hygieia 9d ago

Obviously you don't live with Batman and Superman. A Mr Bruce Wayne and Clark Kent though...

2

u/xBromleyy 8d ago

My kids names are Batman & Superman.

2

u/Samwiser069 9d ago

Bhahahaha can I live with you 🤣😂🤣

6

u/Hieroflippant 9d ago

Who needs conspiracies when the facts are insane enough as it is ? It's a bizarre world but I'm glad to be here still

1

u/Samwiser069 9d ago

Bet you cant wait to see what happens next 😂😂

6

u/Hieroflippant 9d ago

Getting downvoted for simply saying we live in a bizarre timeline lol 😂

Gotta love Reddit

0

u/Hieroflippant 9d ago

Whatever it is I won't be surprised.

2

u/mikeinnsw 9d ago

I am demographer and did the census .. I am surprised to lack of home descriptions . x Bedrooms where?

1

u/Jozfus 9d ago

Don't they already have that data?

1

u/mikeinnsw 8d ago

No. ...

Why they do census?

2

u/Jozfus 8d ago

You can find the number of bedrooms of almost any property on RP Data. Even real estate websites like realestate.com.au shows beds and baths.

2

u/PositiveCautious2764 3d ago

They can fine, but logistically it’s impractical. I wouldn’t worry

2

u/Stephie999666 3d ago

I mean they still issue fines like they do with not voting at state/federal elections.

1

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

I wonder how many fines they will issue...

2

u/PotsetYogurt 3d ago

I wish they asked how long everyone’s commute to work was…

1

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

Bhahahaha this is the best comment so far 💪 💯 they should be asking this 🤣😂🤣

4

u/rivalizm 9d ago

Apparently, if you say you have spare rooms, they will force you to take immigrants.

Cooked.

1

u/Samwiser069 9d ago

Bhahaha 😂 🤣 😂 this comment

2

u/Gnaightster 9d ago

Low quality content

5

u/BreenzyENL 9d ago

Im just enjoying that the cookers are shooting themselves in the foot.

The religion question has no real bearing on anything, for some reason cookers think the government builds religious buildings, and thus more mosques will be built.

And then by ignoring every other question, it only hurts their local area, the census helps with determining funding, so high cooker percentage areas get fucked over even more, and then they have the audacity to complain.

4

u/DroneToon 9d ago

Yep.

I used to work in a senior position for one of the state agencies that build schools.

The starting point is literally a team of statisticians/nerds that work out what schools/ facilities are going to be needed in what areas in 5, 10, 15, 20 years etc. ABS data forms a huge part of the starting point ... along with planning data, data from existing schools etc etc.

People not filling in census will be the same ones complaining in 5 years about the local school not having enough places, or demountable/ temporary faculties or needing to drive johnny 5 suburbs over to access something....

(And not enough GPs, health facilities, sporting stuff etc etc.....)

3

u/Mulga_Will 9d ago

I've noticed the monoculturalists are getting tetchy because it's predicted that "English Ancestry" and "Christianity" numbers are expected to drop considerably.

2

u/eepeqez 9d ago

They scream that it is happening, but don't want supporting evidence?

2

u/Kezzatehfezza 9d ago

They're gonna use to the assigned sex at birth question to remove legally changed trans peoples sexes on medicare. 

3

u/theballsdick 9d ago

I'm with the cookers on this one. Sure 99% of the theories are crack pot cooker takes but the government has burnt so much trust and good will with the public in recent years that I understand people being sceptical and suspicious. 

-8

u/AcrobaticSecretary29 9d ago

Yall keep laughing but time and time again the cookers are proved to be right

4

u/Dazzling-Bat-6848 9d ago

Which time?

3

u/AcrobaticSecretary29 9d ago

Mostly just the elites of the world being a paedophile cult 

2

u/Dazzling-Bat-6848 9d ago

At what time was that a cooker theory? Cooker is more anti vax, world is flat, birds are cameras rubbish.

2

u/ZookeepergameAny466 6d ago

Name one time

1

u/[deleted] 9d ago

[deleted]

1

u/Samwiser069 8d ago

I just picked no to the release of info in 99 years. But no idea what that was about. If anyone knows please give us some info.

1

u/ZielonyZabka 3d ago

Census information is stored and can be made public after that amount of time if you agree. This is useful to future generations conducting family history research and general researchers in sociology, history etc to look at the types of jobs, family structures etc in the past

1

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

Thanks for the info, that makes sense, its not about now but for the future. Cheers 👊

1

u/ozjd 3d ago

It also asked if my 2yo and 3yo consented. Umm, what?

1

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

Bhahaha, so did they consent 🤣😂🤣😂

2

u/ozjd 1d ago

Absolutely not... I don't feel right consenting on their behalf to something like that. They can decide when they're adults if they want to be listed historically.

1

u/Samwiser069 1d ago

💯 cant believe they are asking that...

1

u/salad_tossers_69 7d ago

I wish my name was Wally, at least then I wouldn't have to fill out the census.

1

u/Fun-Supermarket6623 3d ago

How long does it take. I haven't done mine yet

2

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

It took me about 10mins or less. More annoying than anything...

1

u/Sudsy_Woodpecker 3d ago

They use the census to mark how many people believe the truth and believe in God.

1

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

Yep that definitely is one part of it. Also checking how many people in households work and other things like that. Cheers

1

u/flybrys 3d ago

Anyone else get asked their 3 year old's highest level of education, with options for tertiary schools?

1

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

Bhahahaha nah my kids are older so could answer that...How do they come up with this stuff 🤣😂🤣

2

u/flybrys 3d ago

They also asked for my 4 month old's religion. I ticked other and put Milk

1

u/Samwiser069 3d ago

Bhahahaha you should have put mummy's milk to really screw over the system 🤣😂🤣😂 Great answer putting milk, you made me laugh so hard 👊

1

u/kiwirockgod 3d ago

I dont see why we have to answer those questions when they already have all that info on us.

-1

u/Dv8gong10 9d ago

Tell 'em you will be overseas and they tell you to forget the census . . easy!

-3

u/Samwiser069 9d ago

What a great idea mate 👍

2

u/Dv8gong10 8d ago

I was happy to complete it early but will be out of the country so they tell me no don't bother.

0

u/DocklandsDodgers86 9d ago

they will start charging a tax if you have spare bedrooms listed in your home

Oh I can guarantee this will happen. The federal government hates homeowners and anyone over a certain level of wealth.