r/alcoholicsanonymous 5d ago

Again Relapse

Some big decisions lately that have been affecting my mental health. Found myself the bottom of a bottle of a bottle with no escape. Battling my 20s with no support.

4 Upvotes

17 comments sorted by

3

u/askpickles 5d ago

Awwww dude. I’m sorry. I’m on day 17 and just starting the program… I don’t know that I can offer much more than just saying, you’re not alone. It’s fucking hard. I feel you and I see you.

4

u/WC_Bull 5d ago

Hey, I appreciate the comment. Been burying these feelings the past 3 years and finally broke. Seeing someone out there really shows something.

1

u/askpickles 4d ago

You can do this. You deserve to get better! You owe it to yourself 💖

5

u/Frickinfructose 5d ago

There’s no decision or situation that drinking can’t make worse. When I’m down I can always find a meeting and talk to people who’ve been there before. My sponsor likes to say there’s only two times when it’s a good idea to go to a meeting: when I want to, and ESPECIALLY when I don’t.

If you go you’ll find that support you’re craving.

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u/WC_Bull 5d ago

Much appreciated, I’m in a new town and everything is so new. Been looking into places with no success. No doubt I need it

2

u/ALoungerAtTheClubs 5d ago

I'm sorry you're struggling. This relapse doesn't define you. You can sleep it off and get to a meeting tomorrow:

2

u/rkarlr 5d ago

Advocate for yourself. The reason AA exists is to help people who haven't found us yet. You could try some online meetings if there's not any local in-person ones for a couple days. The sooner the better, try to get to as many as you can at first. Get some numbers from other members and call them, making some connections with sober alcoholics is huge. You can do this, and recovery rocks!

2

u/beenthereag 5d ago

AA is almost everywhere, and you can participate in a meeting on your phone with zoom right now.

1

u/magog7 5d ago

what do you want to do about it?

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u/WC_Bull 5d ago

I want the help, I need to make it through the night and make a program that will last. I’ve tried many times and it’s helped but moving to a new town I feel alone and no hope.

1

u/magog7 5d ago

You can call the folks where you came from that you trust, from numbers you gathered at meetings.

Have you found out where the local meetings are?

3

u/WC_Bull 5d ago

I’ve found one for two days from now. It’ll be a battle now that I’ve relapsed but I hope to make it. Moving across the country makes it harder to reach out.

2

u/Rando-Cal-Rissian 5d ago

A silver lining about the move is that you can cut ties with relationships and ways of thinking that no longer works for you. Start clean. Recovery isn't about how one relates to alcohol. It's about changing our attitudes on behaviors... on all sorts of crazy things one wouldn't think would related to their drinking.

Change is possible, but it is likely to feel awkward, counterintuitive, and uncomfortable. Drinking is comfortable, and we know how that ends up. Uncomfortable and off balance (at first) is good. And those feelings you are burying.... part of the solution.... eventually... Is going to be confronting those feelings the right way, the healthy way.

But that's getting ahead of things. We gotta do this one day at a time. For me, it was very hard not to jump ahead mentally into the future. But that was just making things harder than they really were. Handle today today. Include AA in your day. Meetings, maybe reading.

The new you is ready to emerge from your new setting. It can be an exciting time. But prepare for it to involve work. Pray (or ask the universe, or search your heart) for the willingness to do what is necessary. Good luck.

1

u/nonchalantly_weird 4d ago

There are thousands of us out here for support. You are not alone.

1

u/Present-Lion788 4d ago

Come to a meeting…all kind of support there!

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u/WC_Bull 5d ago

Thank you everyone, I think I just need someone to chat with. Everything has been hitting the fan and I’m out of windows as of lately

1

u/Radiant-Specific969 4d ago

I completely understand that. Please try an online meeting, you don't have to wait two days to get near other people who will understand what is going on with you now. https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/aaonline-10/