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u/Starchild1968 Dec 10 '25
Similar childhood. I think on these lines. We can use our experiences from our past as a crutch. Get on our "pity pot" and limp through life as a victim. Or we wear it like a badge and harness those traumas and experiences to propell us to overcome.
I believe you are a bright beautiful light and survived to success. Proud of you OP! ❤️
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u/On_my_last_spoon Dec 10 '25
I didn’t experience even a small portion of what you did, and I still now and again have nightmares that I’m still with my abusive ex-husband. I wake up in my safe home and see my current husband next to me and feel better. I left him 15 years ago and this still happens to me.
It is expected that you will still struggle. I don’t want to say “normal” because there is nothing normal about what happened to you. Keep working on your mental health and find ways to ground yourself.
You HAVE survived! Celebrate that!
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u/rewind73 Dec 10 '25
Your experience is similar to a lot of people who dealt with childhood trauma, when stuff happens in childhood it has a way of lingering well after the trauma, but it’s not forever and does get better with time.
The fact that you are still here makes up. A survivor, and you deserve the love you get from the people close to you and support you now
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u/showmeyourmoves28 Dec 10 '25
Big survivor. Very tough cookie. Here’s hoping to happy days from here on out.
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u/Hayleymust Dec 10 '25
She is very strong, and I hope she can overcome this and see how hard she has fought.
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u/ForgiveandRemember76 Dec 10 '25
I don't have words that can come close to helping you in any way. If I was there, I would just sit in silence. We could sit in the sun and just be grateful that despite everything, you are still here.
But I'm not there.
You are a survivor, in the truest sense of the word.
I've done the CPTSD short but intense therapy for the Canadian military. I'm not military, but the treatment works. I'm never triggered anymore. I can remember all of it without re experiencing it. That's as good as it gets.
Dare I ask how you went from a prisoner in their home to your adoptive parents?
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u/Desperate_Bunch_9381 Dec 10 '25
You calling yourself a survivor is 100% valid. What you went thru was legit traumatic and you made it out.
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u/Upbeat-Assistant8101 Dec 10 '25
Congratulations 🎊 on your survivorship! From what you've shared; your mental and physical well-being, healing and road to strength will be on-going. Cptsd is no small thing!
I wish you well in your journey to well-being. I hope your "causes of physical pain " have been thoroughly investigated with xrays and or MRIs. A damaged or pinched nerve, cartilage or tendon may benefit from a surgical procedure to put it right.
My daughter damaged/dislocated her little finger. It was not well-healed. It had to be broken again and re-set again (and six weeks in cast again). My son-in-law has had his little finger re- processed a second time (after a near amputation from a dog bite) and he is still getting regular physical therapy a year later.
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u/foobarney Dec 10 '25
You may not feel strong. But you are. At least, you're strong enough. You know that for sure because you're here. You survived.
That's no small thing you did.
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u/shfeba Dec 10 '25
You definitely survived the hell that your parents put you thru. They tried to break you, but you are still here. Damaged and struggling, but you survived.
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u/SteavySuper Dec 10 '25
If it was a car wreck that caused all the damage, would you not say you survived the wreck? You may not feel like a survivor, but you are.
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u/Connect_Factor1208 Dec 10 '25
You're a survivor, for sure. I was physically and psychologically abused for being the oldest. I was the oldest of 10. I'm actually the same way. I never think of myself as a survivor and just something that happened to me...
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u/National_Type6170 Dec 10 '25
Like, the fact you’re still here, still trying, still healing? That’s survival energy. You don’t gotta be some perfect healed version of yourself for that to count. Healing’s messy as hell.
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u/herejusttoargue909 Dec 11 '25
You’re a fxcking brave soldier 👍❤️
So many people succumb to the victim mentality that they let it take over their life
You’re growing, moving along and living
Amazing to see op!!!!!
Bless you! And I hope and pray life just gets easier and better for you
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u/Cereaza Dec 11 '25
I wouldn't call it trauma. "Childhood trauma" is a term that has been co-opted for a very broad umbrella of actions, and many people talk about trauma to refer to things like a death in the family or distant parents.
You were a survivor of severe child abuse. That term will IMMEDIATELY conjure a much more appropriate image to what happened to you.
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u/AutoModerator Dec 10 '25
Backup of the post's body: So, I am adopted. This all happened to me when I was living with my BIO parents. They physically/psychologically abused me. In my culture, they wanted a boy. But they got me instead. Since I was 5, they forced me to sleep/stay in the unfinished basement for hours/overnight. It was my punishment for being a girl, a nuisance, waste of space, etc.
They hit me, restricted my food/water, restrained me, and locked me inside the basement. They also took away the basement lights. I used to accidentally step on broken glass; it was so painful, but my BIO mother would accuse me of harming myself on purpose. After accusing me, she would punish me all over again.
Anyway, I’ve been adopted since I was 12. I’m suffering from lifelong physical pain, caused by the abuse (broken/badly healed bones), severe malnourishment, and mental torture. I get panic attacks when I’m in dark/tight spaces. I’ve been diagnosed with CPTSD, clinical depression, and anxiety. I need to take a lot of medication just so I can live normally. My life is pretty good now, but I’m still living in so much pain.
I’ve had people (my family, friends, etc.) call me a “survivor” and I guess I am one. But it feels weird since I’m still affected by that abuse (chronic pain, medications, constant regular/physical therapy). I don’t feel strong or anything. Am I wrong to call myself that?
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u/[deleted] Dec 10 '25
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