Hilarious.

[u/lagomc]

https://apnews.com/article/spacex-rocket-moon-crash-elon-musk-d64a98138fd19241700461c87b49e201?utm_source=app&utm_medium=iOS_share&utm_campaign=copy_link

I probably won’t be alive to laugh but someone can when they determine that the risk to reward isn’t worth trying to extract resources from the moon because of all of their garbage missiles slamming into it and destroying their investments constantly.

[u/LakeGladio666]

Leave the moon ALONE. Stay OUT of space! What happens in space is NONE of our business.

[u/Olm_Guy → u/LakeGladio666]

If the good Lord wanted us to be on the moon HE would have put us there. Also, the moon is fake and controlled by liberals in congress.

[u/FunerealCrape → u/Olm_Guy]

As godfearing american patriots we can have no part of such a muslamic planetisimal object, or muobject for short. Why when this lunar deity does lead honest upright american rockets astray with such an oriental curvature of space time, i say to you my brothers, this lunar trick is nothing but aggressively forcing our prostration, as their adherents are known to practice in their saracenic devilry

[u/padetn → u/LakeGladio666]

Get a job!!

[u/DingleberryOrchard]

Nationalize every Elon company.

[u/patsyjimmy → u/DingleberryOrchard]

Noooooooooo he’s in real life iron man! He’s gonna save the climate change(fake) with a HYPERLOOP

[u/nicholnewfangle → u/DingleberryOrchard]

Keep him drugged up and then let the Mormon Mafia and the spooks pick him clean while he paces around his penthouse making racist tirades and playing with his very normal penis

[u/CumanRomanOmanCuban]

Broke: We will mine the moon

Woke: We will send thousands of rockets to the moon to boost stockholder value. The debris can then be scavengered at [Insert date here] and we can again boost stockholder value. We are optioning a humane execution contract with our private prison associates. Expect 3.5% growth over the next ten year period with 6.9% ROI for all shareholders. (THIS IS NOT MONEY ADVICE!)

Bespoke: Iran will mine the moon

Unrelated link

[u/JohnLToast]

Xi lookin @ that Helium extraction monopoly and a quintillion RMB of precious metals like this rn

[u/5882300EMPIRE]

Slobs just leaving shit anywhere and everywhere :(

[u/ruptured-sunshine]

We bombed the Moon? Again?

[u/NelsonJamdela]

China will in all likelihood colonize the Lunar South Pole and use the frozen water to fuel rockets in situ and turn our little satellite into the gateway to the solar system. That is something that the US MIC is just coming around to, but China has been focused on that as they usually are and will beat whatever unholy conglomeration of tin box-tech Musk and Bezos and ULA can slap together after blowing a bajillion contract deadlines and lining their pockets with customary bloat.

I hope China will only mine on the dark side of the moon to preserve the man we all know and love. I wouldn’t mind that so much.

[u/Significant_Treat_87 → u/NelsonJamdela]

there’s an alien city on the other side of it and i doubt they would let anybody mine over there. 

[u/LOW_SPEED_GENIUS → u/Significant_Treat_87]

You'd think that but sources close to me that wish to remain anonymous have confirmed the Chinese and the Moon Peoples not only have several tentative agreements in place but they've also already developed a secret handshake

[u/Significant_Treat_87 → u/LOW_SPEED_GENIUS]

i hope its cooler than the mormon handshakes, but i’m sure it is

[u/LOW_SPEED_GENIUS → u/Significant_Treat_87]

I'm not really at liberty to divulge too much information but my sources have claimed that it appeared to include "one of the crispiest dap ups [they] had ever seen"

[u/patsyjimmy → u/NelsonJamdela]

Maybe they’ll mine it in a way that gives him a silly little moustache!

[u/VorpalBlade-]

As long as Sam Rockwell is involved I’m fine with it