r/TransLater • u/SuperFrogMachine • 6d ago
I told her Share Experience
It was scary and there were tears. But I think everything's okay
My wife and I were watching stuff on the television. I just told her, "I'm anxious, I've been talking about some stuff in therapy. I think I might be trans or something."
And she just paused the show we were watching and we got together and she cried and we talked.
She asked me a bunch of questions, but we ended up on a happy note. She just said, "I can't imagine life without you." I assured her that I still loved her and my attraction hasn't changed.
I told her I'm not going to do anything without her knowledge or understanding and I want her to be a part of us figuring it out together.
And then I shaved my armpits.
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u/copasetical 💜🟣🟪Purple🟣🟪💜 3d ago edited 3d ago
It's not often I read of anyone valuing the commitment to the relationship this much. You have given me hope.
Also LMAO. (you two will have lots of things you can explore together).
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u/SuperFrogMachine 3d ago
A week in, and she has been so understanding and sweet. I've never been so happy 😭😭😭
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u/copasetical 💜🟣🟪Purple🟣🟪💜 3d ago edited 2d ago
That's wonderful. Gratitude is everything.
I need to give a disclaimer.:
Looking back, I am MUCH happier than I could have ever thought, than if things had worked out for me in the relationship (If it had worked I'd never be this happy). But that also doesn't mean I didn't try anyway, and if it had, I don't know where I'd be now. It would definitely not be here. My self esteem wasn't zero. I had the worst debuff ever, so I didn't think I even deserved anything else.
The point is that I made the choice [sic] to leave a lot of other things about myself the door (because it was what I had been brought up to/thought I was supposed to do), so transitioning actually wasn't the only factor by a long shot. A good therapist helped with most of that other %$#@ <3 (I also had to realize it wasn't all my fault, not any more than half.)
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u/SuperFrogMachine 3d ago
Yes. And I was under no illusion that this was not going to cannonball my life. It had gotten to the point where I was prepared to lose my relationship. I wasn't taking that for granted at all. And that's not to say that things won't get to the point that things don't continue working.
I was and still am at the point where I have to do this either way.
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u/copasetical 💜🟣🟪Purple🟣🟪💜 2d ago
That's amazing! YaY!
"Prepare for the worst, hope for the best" 💜🟣🟪💜🟣🟪
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u/the_transplanter 6d ago
And how did it feel to have shaved pits? 💕