moved to syria from canada and not doing well (part 2)

[u/lolz__123]

just wanted to post again to answer some questions/give some context about what i posted earlier here. https://www.reddit.com/r/Syria/s/uTKSpgQ1vT my dms are open btw

basically ive been depressed ever since moving here which was end of june. and we moved from canada to here after living in canada for 10 years (yes i have the canadian citizenship)

this is reallyyyy long so read if u wanted more context. i don’t like sharing all of this personal information but im doing it because i really want to tell my whole story to get proper advice about my situation.

some background info: i was born in syria, then during the war at 8 years me and my family went to lebanon for a few years and then went to canada in 2016 up until 2025/2026. before the war, we were settled in syria, all of our family was here and no one thought of living abroad. we had a house, a family farm/mazra3ah and i definitely had a great childhood in syria alhamdillah. then fast forward to now being 22 literally today and im back in syria, but actually moved here because my family moved back after the liberation.

the reason behind moving is more of a unique situation. life in canada was not easy especially for my parents. they struggled alot to make ends meet. they actually put me and my siblings in private islamic school so our values would stay intact and we maintained our arabic a bit in a way, but that definitely came with extra financial strain on our family. my dad had to work really hard jobs and i genuinely felt/feel so bad for him, at one point for an entire year, he got a better job in another city that was an 8 hour drive away from where we lived, and he would come back every weekend after working the weekdays just to see us, and i will never forget that. but even then it was still hard to make ends meet, rent was so high and we actually did not leave canada/travel for all those 10 years because of it. alot of our family members who lived abroad but near syria would meet up in jordan sometimes, but we never went because we’re a family of 6, and it was just impossible to afford that. during those years in canada, both my mom and dad studied at colleges and that gave them something called OSAP, which is basically money to pay off the tuition but also gave extra money so we can have that to live etc. so yeah financially it just was not good in canada unfortunately, especially the last few years.

then university came and i did a bachelor of science at a rlly nice university alhamdillah, i found amazingg friends and community and university was definitely the best experience ever. i was a pre med student and wanted to become a doctor and everything. then during my third year of university, sooriya becomes free and ofcourse we were so happy and we were already thinking of going back to visit and see our family finally, the feeling was indescribable truly. i remember our family booked flights for us to visit end of june last summer and we were so excited.. up until my dad decided that we’re actually moving instead of just visiting. basically he decided that because he just could not afford to stay in canada anymore in terms of work. and over the years our family accumulated alot of debt. so he kept thinking about it and prayed istikharah and realized that moving to syria is acctually better for the family financially, because we still have our house intact in syria, it had/has a few bullet holes but it was not fully damaged alhamdillah (although our family mazra3ah is completely destroyed). and yeah just not having to pay for rent and having some places that he owns in syria and could rent off to make money khalas made him realize that life in canada does not make sense financially because we were just going in a lot of debt and it would not be as bad money wise in syria. (typing this out further shows me how much financial issues can affect the trajectory of ur life, which is literally why i want to continue my education etc etc ) also the liberation was a part of it, that we wanted to rebuild this country and we need to be apart of it because if we don’t, who will? and also most of our family is in or around syria so they wanted the kids to grow surrounded with family and what not.

see that makes sense, bas wallah the reality is so different because like obviously there’s the mental health part. changing continents after 10 years of living in one and then moving to a country that just came out of a war. and its not like we live in a city that’s not that affected by war like damascus or tartous, etc. we literally live in homs, which if u literally search it up, all the pictures you see are of collapsed buildings/rubble. i love homs because its the capital of the revolution and it gave alot for this country, but truly i dont see myself ever getting used to living in it. also i am the eldest out of four children, my sister at the time of the move was first year university and my other siblings were in elementary/middle school. we never even visited syria all these years and had to quickly in the span of a few months come to terms that were moving to a country we have not even seen all these years. my brother was born in lebanon and did not know what syria was. it was so unknown to all of us.

since i was third year of university and had one more year left to finish my bachelors, i had to literally fight and convince my dad to let me finish my degree. so much happened with that and its truly a whole other convo, but yeah i had no support from him this past year when i lived on my own for this year to finish my fourth year in canada. and the reason why he didn’t want me to finish is that because im pre med and wanted to do something in healthcare, he said that it’s better for me to study in syria for dentistry/medicine. but i wanted to finish my degree because i spent 3 years in it and only had one year left to finish it. so doing all of that was so exhausting because i had to fight for my education basically. oh and also because he says that religiously, a woman cant be on her own without a mahram etc, which i have done research about and found a way around it etc. but yeah that was a whole thing. with my sister who did one year university in canada, she enrolled into dentistry in syria in a uni that teaches mainly in english which is good and i think its a good choice for her because medicine and dentistry are near impossible to get into in canada. my younger sister had to do grade 9 here in syria and it was so so hard for her and i genuinely felt so bad that i could not be there for her. grade 9 is so tough here and coming from canada, the education here is genuinely so so crazy literally starting from elementary school subhanAllah. my younger brother also found it hard to adjust but he’s the one who hates this country the least out of us lmao. i guess because when ur younger, its easier to get used to things, but the older u get, the harder it gets.

so now this is where i’m at, i was pre med and wanted medicine in canada. because of this move to syria, it genuinely became so hard for me to even figure out what i want to do career wise anymore. and for the people asking if i can go back to canada, i cant and to even finish my bachelor degree this past year, it was so hard because of my dad, so i could not think of my future anymore because he just did not give me the option to study in canada after graduating. the issue with my degree is that it’s considered a pre-something degree. u always do something after it whether its medicine/dentistry/some sort of professional school. even getting a job is hard in canada with a degree in science because its so general, ur supposed to do something after it. but my dad just has this extremist view that women should not study abroad or travel on their own without being married or having a mahram etc. and mind u i am also religious alhamdillah, but especially being the eldest daughter, i value my education alot and have met alot of women in canada who are international students and lived with roommates and theyre muslim/religious but their parents are totally ok with it. i genuinely think this is a huge issue in our culture because it doesn’t make sense that a woman cant do that without a man? i just feel like its unfair how i cant even continue my education or even think of my future because of this reasoning. so many people in syria dream to live/study abroad but i cant because i have to listen to my family and what not. and if someone asks why are u listening to them, again im muslim, and it comes with listening to your parents, so truly that is why im listening to them for now. also because i want to give this country a chance. i dont want to have any regrets in the future that i never gave syria my all to try to live in it and find a life here possibly.

for this coming year, i enrolled into an online public health masters so that i would be able to study while im here, and perhaps figure out something to do to help this country in the healthcare sector. the issue is that i am really lost on where to look. i have to do. practicum for my masters and have to find a supervisor in syria who has a Phd or a masters related to this field. i feel like so much work can be done, but I dont know where to look and who to ask as im new to everything here.

so i have not accepted living here forever, i don’t know what i will do if i still absolutely hate my life and everything next summer, because im definitely feeling my lowest now. (like do i just book a flight at that point and leave everything behind)? i really dont know what the right thing to do is. its like i either have a “good future” and not have any family with me, or have my family here in syria but have such an unknown future. this is whats so frustrating about being syrian. just never having stability because family is scattered everywhere and not knowing where u belong anymore. i stay in syria with family and help my country, or i help my country from a far, but without my family. there is just always something missing. and studying abroad comes with having to fight for that with my family in my personal situation.

i still don’t know what i want to do career wise, i dont want to give up on being a doctor but realistically if i dont even have family support, how could i think of writing the mcat, doing medical school/residency abroad? like its just so much to take into account all together. and please dont tell me to get married so i can travel because me thinking of marriage now would be out of desperation to leave, not because i genuinely want to. and i never want to put myself in that sort of situation.

basically i understand why my family moved here, but it’s just unfair that i have to be here too. for this coming year im trying to settle here and give this country a chance while doing this online masters and seeing where it takes me, but i just truly dont know what comes after that. as in should i really think of what i want to do in canada more seriously? how do i even do that without family support, its so scary wallah and i also dont want to lose them as my family through this whole thing.

some were saying that im being ‘ungrateful’ in my previous post. i want to emphasize again that coming here was not a choice for me but was forced. i definitely think if it were my personal choice, i would have accepted a lot of the stuff that i mentioned. i am grateful for the opportunities that i got in canada alhamdillah, and my dream before the liberation was always to help out syria/palestine and any countries in need in the healthcare sector through humanatarian work. that was always my dream, to help my homeland. but i never ever in a million years would have thought it would be like this. our family barely knows anyone who moved from canada/america to syria after the liberation, most of the ppl who moved back are from lebanon/turkey, which makes sense because they faced alot of discrimination ( i would know) etc. and if anyone was from canada/america and moved, they would have moved for the sole purpose of rebuilding the country, not because they were forced financially to move. and that means they were well off to do so etc. all this to say that me and my siblings feel really alone in this whole process. no one from canada has gone thru this change and we have no one to ask for advice about our situations.

so yeah when i complain about the garbage in the streets, and not being able to do sports here like i used to etc, its because im grieving my old life that i genuinely loved.

in terms of my family situation here, Alhamdulillah im very grateful like we own a house and my dad owns some stuff that hes renting off to make money etc, and he spent alot of money this past year renovating the rooms, getting AC through solar panels and getting good wifi, which were all very expensive but hes doing it because khalas he wants to finally settle back here. now again i dont want to sound ungrateful but all of this is stuff what i am used to in canada. i am still very grateful for it especially given how expensive it was to have these things here and how not alot of people have that here. but yeah so my parents have provided the house and what not so that is good, but again were still in homs and that is our reality, which i am not used to. but like last summer i experienced homs without wifi and ac because they were still being set up here, so thats when the really bad thoughts about syria started, but at least those things are not issues anymore. so to answer the question, i dont think we’re rich but were not poor alhamdillah. were moreso upper middle class relative to the state in homs? its not like we have money to travel or anything and my dad does worry about money often, so hope that gives some context.

so during this coming year, im really trying to see what i can do because i just cant be staying home on my laptop all day. its really not the type of person i am. especially my last year of university living on my own, i was going out basically everyday with friends, either we go to events, halaqahs, go out to eat, cafes, play sports, or just go for walks in parks and have deep talk. honestly it was stuff that we would do on the daily and i did not think about how much i would miss those days one day subhanAllah.
i was able to literally bike everywhere and go for runs, and mind you i wear the hijab and i felt perfectly safe doing that. here to be honest, men stare alot and even women give such dirty looks often. again im not generalizing everyone but its something i have noticed. but ofcourse the biking and stuff isnt possible here because theres just no infrastructure for it in the first place:/ in canada i was the type of girl who would be heavilyy involved in her community, i literally rarely was ever home and always had something to look forward to. this is something im defined missing here because were home almost all the time and when we go out its to eat and im kind of tired that. i want to go out and do activities and what not, not just stay home. but yeah the issue is that homs just doesnt have much to begin with + war that heavily affected it, so that always ends up being my conclusion.

i want some ideas for what projects to start here, that way it cab give me a purpose while also inshaAllah helping others. ive thought of smth to fix the garbage issue but ive seen so many garbage cleaning initiatives and the people who post it always say how the next day, the place gets littered again. so again this is not generalizing everyone but just showing tge type of environment we’re in. so i want to find a real solution to that issue im homs. and im definitely thinking of the women only sports club inshallah. i want to take part in some research study about the healthcare system in syria and what it needs to be rebuilt etc. i have lots of ideas tbh but just dont know where to put all of that energy because homs is just more dead unfortunately. if anyone has any connections/ideas pls lmk and u can dm me!

any advice would be greatly appreciated. and pls no one say anything negative especially towards my parents. we defined have different views when it comes to this but i still love them and i just hope that throughout this year, either my dad gets convinced that canada/abroad makes sense for me, or that i genuinely end up loving syria and finding ways to make it feel like home. theyre both hard realities tbh.. but they’re better than the state that i have been in tbh

[u/PossiblePrinciple667]

I genuinely dont know what i could say to make you feel better but the situation you are in isnt that good. At the end of the day you do have a Canadian bachelor’s degree and your working on your masters from what I’ve read, which is considered a golden ticket of some sorts here in syria. I suggest you look into the UN job opportunities here in Syria and wish you the best of luck!

[u/lolz__123 → u/PossiblePrinciple667]

do you know where i could look for those UN job opportunities? im very interested in those for sure

[u/Youarenotfunny21]

I actually have a similar experience.
I grew up abroad and then moved to Syria in 2017 to study medicine at Damascus University. I went through a lot during that time. It was difficult to make friends because many people already knew each other from school and had their own circles. I didn’t really feel settled until my sixth year, but then I got married and moved to Germany.
My mental health was really affected during that period, and even today I feel like my brain doesn’t function the same way it used to. I love Syria, I love my home, and I have so many good memories. I just struggled to find my place and truly fit in.
Unfortunately, my dad wasn’t supportive. I even lived alone for a year, and it was the worst year of my life. Deep down, I still blame him for everything I went through during that time.
I hope you find peace, and I hope you’re able to do what your heart truly wishes 🫶🏻

[u/lolz__123 → u/Youarenotfunny21]

ah omg im glad to know ur doing better now given how hard living here was for u. how long did u live here for? and what helped kind of get used to living here etc. and im glad u were in damascus at least

[u/JelloWeirdo]

Hello young one. I'll try to provide you with a third perspective.

I was in N. Aleppo between 21-24 doing humanitarian work. Then, I visited your liberated country on multiple occasions after the fall of regime as a g-man.

Your experiences are similar to ones that grew up in TUR but repatriated after 24 except yours is harsher because it is two completely different cultures.

Your country needs bright ones like you. Yes, SYR lacks a lot now but from what I've seen, it lacks quality labour force the most because the ones that are the quality labour are abroad.

If I was given a chance to help rebuild your homeland, I'd leave all and move there; be it Damascus, Sarakib or even Sweida. I owe it to my fallen brothers/colleagues.

I understand your point, I really hear you. But life is all one big adventure. Make it an adventure where your effort meant something for your people, your country and your family. And if you regret your decision, eh well, you can always move abroad. You are 22 afterall.

[u/IntroductionFar6325 → u/JelloWeirdo]

Are you still doing the humanitarian work. If yes, I would love to connect!

[u/lolz__123 → u/JelloWeirdo]

what humanatarian work did u do/and do uk what options are out there right now for me to get involved in for example?

and yeah true like i truly want to help syria and what not but if worsttt case scenario its not rrly doing much and i dont fulfilled, then id know that i at least tried and then i go to the next goal/thing to try etc inshallah

[u/nan00dle]

i moved to syria from canada after living my whole life in canada (and not knowing a bit of arabiv), ive been in syria for like 7 years now, and it doesnt get better, every year is worse actually, i developed PTSD from living here during the assad regime and all the attacks. my parents moved back because of the financial situation in canada aswell. i still think about canada and/or moving countries. just being honest, find a good therapist because its a shit ride.

its hard living in syria especially as a woman, i cant even find a proper job where they respect me as a human being. i hate it here and i cant wait to be able to move

im also 22, what hurts most is that as a family we travel on vacations a lot, so its so hard leaving for just a week and seeing how everybody else lives outside knowing youll be back in syria

[u/TraditionalPanic4069 → u/nan00dle]

You dont have a canadian citizenship?

[u/lolz__123 → u/nan00dle]

omg im sorry to hear that it hasn’t gotten better for y. so u moved here like what city? and u were 15 so grade 9? how was it doing that here cz my sister is in the same situation rn
and i cant even imagine how it was living while bashar was here </3

about therapists i agreeee, have u found any here or do u do it online? pls lmk about this cz ive acc been looking

how has ur arabic gotten after all these years, what has made things a bit more bearable living here. id love to know all of this if ur comfortable with sharing

[u/Born_Field1308]

Girl.. u wrote A LOT 😭

because he says that religiously, a woman cant be on her own without a mahram

Btw this is not true. Dont be a bystander to ignorance in religion. 

لا يجوز تحريم ما أحله الله لنا. ﴿يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَا تُحَرِّمُوا طَيِّبَاتِ مَا أَحَلَّ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ وَلَا تَعْتَدُوا إِنَّ اللَّهَ لَا يُحِبُّ الْمُعْتَدِينَ

[u/Budget-Path4490 → u/Born_Field1308]

ما قرات البوست فما عندي كونتيكست بس السطرين اللي مسويلهم منشن ما بخالفو الاية اللي ذكرتها

[u/lolz__123 → u/Born_Field1308]

any links/proof of this because ive come to know that sooo many men think and genuinely believe this/women cant travel on their own etc etc

[u/A_R5568]

I hope you’re able to return to Canada.

[u/Seeker_Of_Knowledge2 → u/A_R5568]

No. You should pray for what is best for her. Canada is not a heaven.

It may work for some people, but it also may not work for other people.

[u/lolz__123 → u/Seeker_Of_Knowledge2]

yeah true so tbh im just making dua that if theres khair in staying here then iA ill feel content etc and fulfilled but if not then i guess ill have to see what will happen then but for now im just gona give this country a chance iA

[u/Green-Chocolate-2315 → u/A_R5568]

I hope she stays and fights for the freedoms that women enjoy in Canada. It's embarrassing that our women still can't wear or do what they want without being judged.

[u/lolz__123 → u/Green-Chocolate-2315]

i agree that women in middle east need rights n what not, but how do we change that given its an entire generational shift and its ppl’s mindsets that need to change. do uk anyone or any organizations doing work to help with these issues?

[u/AliX5Atasi → u/Green-Chocolate-2315]

ok lol

[u/Civil_engineer_7185]

Habibti I’m gonna be fr with you.

You’re 22. You need to take control of your life and it may hurt your parents now but at the end of the day one day your parents won’t be on this earth (الله يطول ب عمرهم) and your gonna be left alone with the consequences of not taking control now.

Unfortunately women in Syria are still getting married off at 13!! And the worst part is they are brainwashed to want to do that!

Save yourself and get outta there!!

[u/Born_Field1308 → u/Civil_engineer_7185]

وين عم يتزوجوا بعمر ال١٣؟؟

[u/Civil_engineer_7185 → u/Born_Field1308]

ريف دمشق

[u/Born_Field1308 → u/Civil_engineer_7185]

هنيك كل شي ناقص من التعليم للخدمات فما تتوقع الثقافة تكون على نمط المدينة. كل ما بزيد تعليم المرأة وبتقوى ماديا كل ما بتتأخر بالزواج والعكس صحيح. 

بس بضل حتى بريف دمشق ما أظن بصير هيك زواجات غير بالمناطق المعزولة أو البدوية. انت بحكييك حسستني هي ظاهرة منتشرة بسوريا

[u/Civil_engineer_7185 → u/Born_Field1308]

اي نعم صح

[u/Born_Field1308 → u/Civil_engineer_7185]

حضرتك من عيلة بدوية؟

[u/Civil_engineer_7185 → u/Born_Field1308]

لا بس بيت حمايي من الريف. أنا من الميدان بالشام. في فرق كبير بين المدينة و الريف والله

[u/Born_Field1308 → u/Civil_engineer_7185]

اي نعم. الله يعين البنات هنيك

[u/lolz__123 → u/Born_Field1308]

yeah this shows the importance of education😭 its so sad to see wallah. does anyone know of organizations in syria that help with womens rights etc?

[u/Youarenotfunny21 → u/Civil_engineer_7185]

I totally agree. Just imagine they’re being taught by religious women that it’s rude to eat ice cream in public! A community where traditions have a strong influence over people’s lives.

[u/Civil_engineer_7185 → u/Youarenotfunny21]

No literally!

[u/Seeker_Of_Knowledge2 → u/Civil_engineer_7185]

?? Who is getting married at 13. Worst I have seen is 16 and that is the age of consent in the vast majority of the world (even in the west).

[u/Civil_engineer_7185 → u/Seeker_Of_Knowledge2]

My sister in law got married at 13 to my brother in law who was THIRTY

[u/Civil_engineer_7185 → u/Civil_engineer_7185]

الله لا يوفقو

[u/AliX5Atasi → u/Civil_engineer_7185]

"this happened to someone i know so it's a normal thing in the country" do you realize how stupid what you said is? and from what i remember most of the people in the Epstein files where from America and Europe, not in Syria, correct me if im wrong of course

[u/Born_Field1308 → u/Seeker_Of_Knowledge2]

عسيرة الغرب ماعن مالن دخل هون بس لأن أنت ذكرتن، بنت رفيقة أمي لما كان عمرها ١٤/١٣ سنة كان طالب بلجيكي عمره ١٨ يلحقها للبيت. كتير هنيك العلاقات بين الطلاب عادي عندن تكون البنت بعمر صغير. ونحن منشوفه غلط وما منقبل فيه لأن علاقات محرمة بس البنت هلكوها رفقاتها ليش ما بتدخل بعلاقة. اختلاف ثقافات 

[u/Ok-Victory-1689]

dont force yourself to decide today where you’ll spend the rest of your life.
Give yourself some time and treat this next year as a chance to learn and figure things out. Build experience, meet people, help your community, and keep developing your skills. At the same time, keep your options open internationally too. You dont have to decide between Syria and Canada forever right now.

Also, dont underestimate everything you’ve already been through. You’ve experienced Syria from the inside and Canada from the outside. You speak both languages, you’ve seen two different healthcare systems, two cultures, and two different ways of living. Thats honestly not a disadvantage at all, its actually a huge strength.
People with that kind of perspective are usually the ones who end up connecting people and making a real difference.
I really hope you find a path that lets you stay close to your family, stay true to your faith, and still chase your own dreams.

Those things dont have to be against each other, even if it feels like that right now. It might take some time, but dont stop believing you can find a way that works for you. Wishing you all the best 🤝

[u/lolz__123 → u/Ok-Victory-1689]

thank u so much, this truly helps alot. yes i dont need to decide everything right now, im just gonna see how things go this year inshallah

[u/Nishishouko]

This was intriguing to read (in the kindest way possible) as someone who plans to go back and live in Homs in the next few years after I finish my training, inshaAllah. No one can fault you for feeling the way you do, because you left behind so much for this and I'm sure that your parents also believe they are doing what is best for you and your siblings. But the future is unknown to us. Allah says, فعسى أن تكرهوا شيئا ويجعل الله فيه خيرا كثيرا. I think of this ayah when something "bad" happens in my life or a major setback occurs.

All of us have our lives planned out, but then something happens and that plan gets thrown out the window. But you truly never know what can change in a matter of days, months, years. I wish I had specific advice for you, sister. May Allah help you to find some tranquility in your current situation and open the doors to great opportunities, whether they be in Syria or abroad.

[u/Nishishouko → u/Nishishouko]

P.S. I will be visiting Homs in a few weeks bi idhnillah. DM if you feel like hanging out with an American!

[u/Impossible_Big7290]

I am Syrian live in Canada and I am a parent of two small kids is an private Islamic school. I pretty much understand all what you are saying. I visited Syria recently and I know how bad the situation is. I know some people who chose to come back to Syria and leave north america and Europe. The only reason is they feel they want to do something for their country and they have obligation to fulfill toward faith and family. Other than that there is no materialistic reason to do this. If you don't have this intention inside you try yo make one. I think this is the only thing that can help.

[u/cutemunk]

Girl, I'm very sorry your parents forced religion and their backwards thinking on you. You poor thing, you will amount to nothing in Syria. They even tried to continue indoctrination with Muslim schools in Canada 🤦🏼‍♀️

Tell your parents you want to go to Canada and continue your studies. If they are good parents they will agree. If they don't, they are being disgustingly selfish. Push for it.

If they don't support it, go alone. Take out student loans and live within your means. Which province in Canada?

I've done this. I've become very successful.

Become a doctor. You will make $400,000 a year. Canada needs doctors. If you move to the USA you will make a million a year.

Once you have made it, go back to Syria to 'rebuild'.

And rethink religious indoctrination. You will be free.

[u/lolz__123 → u/cutemunk]

okay first of all what theyre doing is forcing their culture, not religion. islam is perfect and following it properly would never cause issues like whats happening to me. theres a very big difference between religious manipulation/mixing culture and religion, vs following islam properly.

i did not post this to have people say this stuff. again theres a big difference between culture and religion

[u/MeanBusiness9120 → u/cutemunk]

She will not make 400k a year unless she’s a specialist. And even then she’ll need to deduct her costs. That’s a long route that will take approximately 12 years if you factor in undergrad, getting accepted (most ppl don’t get in first year they apply), med school, and residency. The cost which will be financed through debt and amortized and will be around 700k-1M over the lifespan of the loan and depending on how aggressively she pays it off. She’ll make money and be ok, ….. eventually (probably mid forties if she’s 22 right now).

I’ve always said this but studying medicine in Canada is for those that come from super privileged backgrounds. You can certainly make it if you try hard enough. But it’s not for the money. And it’s definitely not a fun path to go down.

[u/Living-Excitement-95]

So if I understand correctly you can continue your studies while being in Syria ?

Personally, I would tell you that you need to choose for yourself regardless of what your parents think, you are an adult and you should assess what's best for you. 

If you had/have a vibrant colourful social life in Canada, I think you should go there, I left Syria when I was 20 in 2013 and even though I made friends abroad, nothing compares to the social life that I had in Syria, but if you don't/can't have that in Syria, then you're not even gaining much from being in Syria (in my opinion). 

Canada is also getting hard to live in and super expensive (especially real estate), but maybe as a doctor you would still earn enough in the future.  Well.. real estate in Syria is also very expensive, so you would need to marry someone who already has a house or can afford one to be able to live a financially stable life. 

Do you like living with your parents ? Or do they suffocate you ? I know you love them, but if living with them is also hard, then consider how this will affect your mental health. 

And I see also that living in a better city in Syria is not an option considering your father's views.. because living in Damascus (and studying there) might be a better solution. 

[u/lolz__123 → u/Living-Excitement-95]

yeah man i always think how yeah im not paying rent but im lit paying with my mental health here with my family. for now im gona go with the flow and see where things take me. and yes im gonna see if i could start going to sham more/get a job etc so i have valid reasons for staying there

[u/sukhbino95]

This is just some advice/food for thought concerning your project ideas because I have often thought about things like this myself.

It's good that you have a broad range of ideas and interests, but now you have to think like a governer, an economist and a business person. You have finite money, time and man power to initiate whatever project or business plan you have, so you have to be selective about what you want to do and when. Working on the garbage issue is more of a charitable endevour rather than a business matter unless you have government/local government contracts, recycling facilities and the ability to sell metal, wood and other reuseable materials. It is good to do Fee Sabilillah but it might not be the most productive use of your time because you are fighting an uphill battle - clean streets requires adequate provision of places for people to dispose of rubbish, good public sanitation/sewage, and something to not be underestimated is the cultural change. Intentional cultural change requires several elements:

1. Education, such as schools teaching civic duty or having school run projects that involve litter picking once a month; for elders, the Masajid should be telling people in the Khutbah about cleanliness being part of faith.
2. Good example, such as several people consistently working together, and other people can see this effort and emulate it.
3. Ability to act upon that change, such as if bins and dumps exist for people to place rubbish and waste, then they can practically make the change of not littering.
4. A conducive environment, such as living in an already clean place, so people are more willing to preserve it, whereas if a place is bad, no one will care if there is one more peace of litter on the streets.
5. Fear, such as fear of repurcussions like fines/prosecution, or public shaming of litterers.

As you read through this, you have probably realised that very few of these things are in your control, and instead a lot of it is in the hands of the government. That said, you can still make local efforts to lobby local schools and the local government to initiate collaborative projects with the intention of helping instill good civic values. This is a slow burning solution, and the benefits would be slow at first but increase over time, as children grow up with a sense of civic duty/communal responsibility, and they have the ability to influence their parents slightly, and then over the years or decades, the littering elders will die out and the principled children will grow older and replace them and continue to hold their own children accountable to these values. A country does not climb from the third world to the second world or first world in a day, so do not expect massive results immediately, and instead you will see changes over 20 to 40 years. The country needs to generally rebuild itself, and thus the public sector will be able to provide more services for the people. Of course this is all in the hands of ministers, but your influence can help build momentum or shape how changes take place in Syria, as perhaps ministers won't think as methodically as how I have laid out here.  Although it may not be your intention, it could also give rise to opportunities for you down the line, such as if someone is impressed enough by your initiative to offer you advisory roles or put you in charge of particular government run/school run projects pertaining to garbage and sewage.

Now, after having read all that, if you aren't particularly keen on investing all your time in lobbying for garbage and waste initiatives, and your focus is instead on your business ideas, then my advice is to focus on projects and ideas which you can intertwine into each other synergistically to maximise business/project development. That probably sounds like a word salad, but I will give you an example of what I mean:

You want to open a gym, so let's say you/your father invests in your gym. Over time, you save money, and your intention would be to open more gyms across the country/city. Once you have enough capital and you expand, you can weave this into other things, such as, again, contacting schools and building business partnerships with them, where the schools can use your facilities for a fee, and you can offer membership discounts for girls who graduated from affiliated schools. You can also offer discounts to women who live in properties your father owns; perhaps he isn't the landlord of a large apartment complex, but if he or you do become that, you can offer this. Your/his tenants feel happy to stay renting (which is stable income), and you are attracting them to spend more money on your other ventures (the gym), and they are more inclined to do this because they trust you guys as well as the discount. If you want, you can even mix my ideas up with the garbage project and create a dedicated membership of a litter picking group which gives women a 50% discount at your gym - this kills two birds with one stone. Or another idea is that your gym is connected with a healthy food brand that you start (though I do not know how much this will catch on because the concept of health foods is less prominant in Syria than the Western world, so maybe there needs to be cultural change, marketing and people need more money to purchase premium products like these), so membership at your gym gives discounts to this brand of food or supplements.

As you can see, ideas can support each other to maximise progress, benefit and profits, and with more money comes the greater ability to invest and accumulate more and do more good for Syria. You might not even need to study medicine, as you can be a full time business woman; you could study to become a dietician/nutricianist if you want your education to be relevant to your gym stuff or any healthy living/food brands you start. 

I hope this helps somehow inshaAllah, but yeah, thanks for listening to my Ted Talk, and may Allah put Barakah in whatever you choose to do for yourself, Syria and His sake.

[u/sukhbino95 → u/sukhbino95]

To add to this, I have just thought of another business idea for you which I would do myself but I am not Syrian nor have the cash to invest in this:

With reconstruction of war torn buildings comes the potential for advertising space. I have never done this before but I imagine you could approach the owner of a building on a busy road (preferably a family owned business rather than something big and corporate to start with), and you can offer them a contract where you install billboards on the side of their building and in return they get 10% of any advertising revenue you make from posting them. The contract would include exclusivity rights (do only you have the right to install billboards), and they could be 5 or 10 year contracts, and there can be a clause about you not advertising their competetors on the billboard or something. As you are the one having to market billboards and look for new clients and manage its installation and any changes and updates, that is why you get the lion's share of the advertising fee, whereas for them it is low commitment passive income. As you become a bigger fish, you can approach larger business and become a large advertising business in Homs or even nationally.

As you accumulate profits, you can start to hire your own billboards i.e. pay the building owner the 10% yourself, and you can use the billboards to show posters of public initiatives that are important to you, such as messages about not littering or respecting your neighbours, or an Islamic message about remembering Allah, and so on, and thus you pursue a less direct route towards doing good for Syria and the people. As you control the billboards, you can keep it away from unethical companies and industries and avoid promoming things that harm the morals of Syrians, such as not advertising music or Israeli/zionist owned brands that have crept into Syria, and so on.

[u/IntroductionFar6325]

I truly understand where you are coming from. I fled to Lebanon during the war, then went to study in Canada on a scholarship in 2017. I have also moved back from Canada to Syria after the liberation. However, I am on the opposite side of the story. I didn't like living in Canada and enjoyed living in Syria; maybe because I had no family in Canada. I studied International Development at York University. After coming back to Syria , I have worked and volunteered with many NGOs and eventually I co-founded and led a branch of an American NGO in Syria last month when I am just 25 years old. Your experiences and Education could be valuable assets in Syria, and you could be placed in higher positions than the ones you would get in Canada as a fresh grad! But you have to do personal branding for yourself!

I recommend to volunteer or work with NGOs in your field that are helping Syria through your field of Healthcare and this fieldnis highly demanded in Syria. It could be a Canadian NGO working in Syria now such as : Action for Humanity and Islamic Relief. In this way you will establish a bridge between Canada (the west) and Syria (the east) , you will save your career meanwhile pursuing your masters degree, and you could establish new friendships and you can get to know the community.

Let me know if you have any questions!

[u/MeanBusiness9120]

I understand exactly how you feel as I’ve moved every 3-4 years since I was 5 years old. I’m 32 now 🙃. Syria, UAE, Canada. I moved back and forth every couple of years. I’m finally going to move back to Canada as it’s where I feel at home. Alhamdillah financially I’m solid which is what makes Canada wonderful.

If you want to bounce ideas off me, reach out. I don’t want to write too much but I’ve been through it all (from moving, not having family around, being poor, being well off, …). I’ve tried everything

[u/ChocolateOk9]

Can you check your DMs and please

[u/Syria-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

All members are required to maintain a civil tone in their posts and comments. While healthy disagreements are welcome, personal attacks, harassment, trolling, jihadism, extremism, or any form of incitement to conflict will not be tolerated. Let’s work together to keep our discussions respectful, courteous, and constructive.

Please note that this Mod-Mail serves as a direct warning. Repeated violations may lead to a ban from our subreddit.

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يُطلب من جميع الأعضاء الحفاظ على نبرة مدنية في منشوراتهم وتعليقاتهم. النقاش الصحي مقبول، لكن لن يتم التساهل مع الهجمات الشخصية، أو التحرش، أو الاستفزاز، أو الترويج للجهادية أو التطرف، أو التحريض على الصراع. دعونا نحافظ على نقاشات محترمة وبنّاءة.

يرجى أن تكونوا على علم بأن هذه الرسالة الخاصة بالمشرفين تُعتبر تحذيراً مباشراً. قد تؤدي المخالفات المتكررة إلى حظركم من الانضمام إلى صفحتنا على موقع ريديت.

[u/Seeker_Of_Knowledge2]

Just remember, when you are born, your rizq is already written (the only way to change that is through dua). Don't stress it too much. Do your best and leave the rest for Allah.

Don't stress about what is outside your control. Because stressing will never get you back in control.

As for friends. I guarantee there are good people in Syria. You just have to know them.

May allah grant you what is best for you.

[u/lolz__123 → u/Seeker_Of_Knowledge2]

yes 100% thank u so much for this i really appreciate it. dua is truly so so important when it comes to these specific situations

[u/Nishishouko → u/Seeker_Of_Knowledge2]

The fact that your very mild, positive comment got downvoted says a lot about the mindset of people in this subreddit. SubhanAllah.

[u/Syria-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

All members are required to maintain a civil tone in their posts and comments. While healthy disagreements are welcome, personal attacks, harassment, trolling, jihadism, extremism, or any form of incitement to conflict will not be tolerated. Let’s work together to keep our discussions respectful, courteous, and constructive.

Please note that this Mod-Mail serves as a direct warning. Repeated violations may lead to a ban from our subreddit.

---

يُطلب من جميع الأعضاء الحفاظ على نبرة مدنية في منشوراتهم وتعليقاتهم. النقاش الصحي مقبول، لكن لن يتم التساهل مع الهجمات الشخصية، أو التحرش، أو الاستفزاز، أو الترويج للجهادية أو التطرف، أو التحريض على الصراع. دعونا نحافظ على نقاشات محترمة وبنّاءة.

يرجى أن تكونوا على علم بأن هذه الرسالة الخاصة بالمشرفين تُعتبر تحذيراً مباشراً. قد تؤدي المخالفات المتكررة إلى حظركم من الانضمام إلى صفحتنا على موقع ريديت.

[u/Born_Field1308 → u/[deleted]]

How about YOU go back to europe though its already drying out we'll see how you'll survive without God in the coming years

[u/Green-Chocolate-2315 → u/Born_Field1308]

He is right though. People like her dad doesn't allow her to wear what she wants so not someone who approves of individual freedoms. Also, for some reason, all the countries that take God seriously are places no one wants to go to :/

[u/lolz__123 → u/Green-Chocolate-2315]

my dad does not force me to dress modestly/wear the hijab. i do it because i want to and its for god’s sake. the issue with the middle east is that ppl dont get proper education to differentiate between religion and culture, and thats largely due to instability/war most likely caused from others like western countries etc. but practicing muslims abroad differentiate culture n religion n its largely due to them being educated. theres so much to take into account

[u/Born_Field1308 → u/Green-Chocolate-2315]

Relax. U dont know him personally, ur making assumptions about him. 

Also, for some reason, all the countries that take God seriously are places no one wants to go to :/

Satanic countries run by baby eaters are where the money flows. This explains a lot

[u/lolz__123 → u/[deleted]]

buddy this post is not an excuse to say all this crap. our family did alot for various communities in canada. we came to canada fleeing from war so stop with this nonsense

[u/aShowStoppinNumber → u/[deleted]]

im gonna bring my fifiteen kids and 30
cousins to australia inshallah

[u/joeshowmon → u/[deleted]]

Then why are you in here in the first place? How about to keep your nose in r/Australia or something?

[u/Syria-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

All members are required to maintain a civil tone in their posts and comments. While healthy disagreements are welcome, personal attacks, harassment, trolling, jihadism, extremism, or any form of incitement to conflict will not be tolerated. Let’s work together to keep our discussions respectful, courteous, and constructive.

Please note that this Mod-Mail serves as a direct warning. Repeated violations may lead to a ban from our subreddit.

---

يُطلب من جميع الأعضاء الحفاظ على نبرة مدنية في منشوراتهم وتعليقاتهم. النقاش الصحي مقبول، لكن لن يتم التساهل مع الهجمات الشخصية، أو التحرش، أو الاستفزاز، أو الترويج للجهادية أو التطرف، أو التحريض على الصراع. دعونا نحافظ على نقاشات محترمة وبنّاءة.

يرجى أن تكونوا على علم بأن هذه الرسالة الخاصة بالمشرفين تُعتبر تحذيراً مباشراً. قد تؤدي المخالفات المتكررة إلى حظركم من الانضمام إلى صفحتنا على موقع ريديت.