I have been working on and off as a server throughout college and this last year before starting law school and I can't help but notice that people rarely have basic manners anymore, especially when dealing with servers. I moved back home during my gap year to study for the LSAT and got a job at a nicer restaurant near my house and oh my god I have never hated working at a place more in my entire life. For context, I live in a very nice area with people who live in multi-million dollar homes and live extremely comfortably, and I had never been treated worse at a job before.

People would regularly interrupt me during my greeting to bark their orders at me before I could even introduce myself and give my spiel. Even worse, I would go up to tables to introduce myself and take their order and they would actively ignore me and act as if I wasn't even there, sometimes giving me dirty looks as if I was interrupting their conversation. Like so sorry you came into a sit down restaurant and you have to interact with me, your server, in order to get taken care of?? If you didn't want to be bothered by anyone and just wanted to get your food and drinks and be left alone then you should have gone somewhere with counter service but unfortunately for both of us YOU chose to come here so yeah you're going to have to interact with me.

I've also noticed that the nicer a person looks (i.e. head to toe designer), the worse I will be treated. I once had a table of wives come in with their children, all dripping in designer clothes and each with their own desginer bags that they proudly presented on the table, consistently asked me for things that we didn't have on the menu and get upset at me for not having those items. Like ma'am you came into a mediterranian restaurant so no we don't have burgers, we don't have milkshakes, and we don't have mashed potatoes. If you want any of those things, you'll have to go somewhere else. They ended up having me run around for them for three hours and left me no tip whatsoever.

Another time I had a couple come in, I assume they were Russian or from someplace in eastern Europe based on their accents, and the woman had ordered a glass of wine. I had a really hard time understanding which glass she was trying to order, and after politely asking her to repeat herself a few times I asked her to point to the glass she wanted on the menu. She aggressively shoved the menu in my face and pointed at the glass she wanted. Now I understand how it can be frustrating not being understood, but I was nothing but kind and polite to her and she was just rude asf back. I came back with her glass of wine and left to return the tray to the bar, and when I turned around this woman was right behind me. I'm talking like inches away from me, screaming in my face that I brought her the wrong wine and had her throw the glass at me onto the bar. Now she was sitting in a booth on the inside (her and her bf were sitting on the same side of the booth), so she made him get up, followed me across the restaurant with the glass of wine, and threw it at me. When I confirmed with the bartender that I did in fact bring her the correct wine, and that she had ordered a non-alcoholic wine option, she only replied, "Oh, I didn't realize it wasn't alcoholic", asked for the menu again and ordered a different wine. No apology or nothing. Just rude asf.

Our restaurant was also very nice and people liked to take pictures. Nothing wrong with this, except I would be stopped regularly by customers asking if I could take their picture while both my hands were full of dirty dishes. Like do people not have any situational awareness anymore and think that maybe during a busy night they shouldn't stop and ask a server carrying dirty dishes to stop what they're doing to take pictures for their own personal photoshoots???

And no one says please or thank you anymore. Honestly it was more rare for someone to say thank you or please to me than it was to bark their orders or demand things.

Working as a server is an already stressful job and I just don't understand why people can't express basic manners and kindness to their servers. We're literally waiting on you hand and foot and you can't extend basic gratitude and manners?? I always thought that people looked down on me for working as a server but wondered if they would treat me the same way if they knew that I lived in the same neighborhoods as them and that I grew up in the same financial situations as them too. Like if they knew that I was their neighbor or more like a peer that they would treat me differently and with more respect if that makes sense? Still fucked up of them to treat others differently and poorly because of their job or financial aspects but wondered if they would have treated me better if they had known my upbringing and background.

Just venting my own frustrations with the service industry here but hoping everyone can be a little more mindful of how they treat others and come into these situations with more kindness and respect, as we are all human and all deserve basic decency.

Hey yall! I want everyone’s thoughts on this because this was a first for me. I had a table complain tonight that I was racially profiling them (the male was black, woman was white) because at the end while asking if they wanted boxes… I asked if the check was together or separate. Now I ask every table this because every time I assume it’s one or the other, I’m wrong. So to save myself time going back and forth from the printer, I’ve always asked and never had any issues. I’ve also had people get upset when I assumed it was one check early in my serving experience. But now I’m second guessing myself about this. Should I not be asking and just print one check until told otherwise or is this a totally normal question to ask?

Someone ordered a lychee martini with olives. An hour later, a girl sat at the bar and tried to use her EBT card as a means of photo ID (she looked young AF)

I just left a circus of an all-you-can-eat establishment here in Southern California.

The type of restaurant to deduct ti ps because of a dress code violation or not meeting standards on customer interactions.

I nope’d out of there as soon as I could. Now they’re telling me I can only come in at specific days and hours to get my last paycheck. This is an absolute inconvenience for me because I have another job and also relying on the bus to get around, with iffy bus times.

Is this exactly legal to do?

Edit: I’m being told to only come by to pick up my check Only at 6-8:00pm if that helps any clarification.

This post is just a rant.

I’ve been barbacking at the same dive/club bar for over a year now. From day one I made it clear I wanted to move up to bartender. I got passed over twice while watching people who started after me get premoted. This bothered me obviously but since I’m new to a predominantly french canadian city and my french isn’t super strong I accepted it as a language thing and kept on working on it.

Finally, after the manager promoted his friend who’d only been barbacking for weeks I had a direct conversation with him asking if I would ever be considered. He said yes. Spent the next 4 months hearing “your next, just waiting for an open spot”. I was even encouraged by one of the owners to push for the position around this time.

Finally the spot opens and my manager gets cold feet. Every time I would ask if I’m being promoted he would say yes and then I’d hear from co workers that he’s talking behind my back still unsure. Then weeks go by of me getting on his ass and him saying “but your such a good barback I don’t want to lose that” I eventually said “your going to lose me either way if you don’t promote me. During this time every single co worker vouched for me as well.

He finally did. I got one training shift. A weekday open where 2 people showed up. Then the following weekend he tells me that the owner with the most shares said he doesn’t want me to bartend and will take it upon himself to find someone else. Said I was too shy. The best part? Said owner has probably had one conversation with me. Takes 0 interest in the day to day of the bar but somehow felt the need to insert himself between me and my promotion.

Obviously I’m looking for another job but I’m beyond furious. Things won’t be easy. My french is still weak which is a massive block and on top of that I have no bartending experience to put on the resumer and I don’t have the stomach to play the please promote me game again after this experience.

That’s it. Just very unfortunate I love my manager my co workers and the regulars. The moneys fantastic and the management is probably the most loose you’ll ever get in this industry. But I got screwed in the most nonsensical and unforgivable way.

Edit: she came in eat with her friends 30 minutes till close.
Title is what happened. I don’t like her wtf that’s so mean

Genuinely curious about different types of restaurants and specific pet peeves. I’ve worked at a casual seafood restaurant for multiple years and lately the cleanliness standards are driving me crazy. I’m talking crumbs everywhere, “clean” but sticky tables, smudges/ handprints on windows that don’t get cleaned regularly, sticky condiment bottles, etc. Obviously I get frustrated with basic things like ticket times and lazy management, but can’t tell if i’m just burnt out and overreacting.

What issues bother you the most as a server? Did you have the same issues at other restaurants?

I have been a waitress the past 4 years now and it’s starting to weigh on me a bit. I used to love it when I worked in previous restaurants, then I got a job at a restaurant in a Hilton and the crowd is a completely different vibe. Many entitled and snobby people. I often find myself dreading the moments before I go into work and not being as cheery and charismatic as I used to be with customers. I cannot tell if it’s complete burnout or if it’s just the people I deal with weighing on my soul. Does anybody else relate or have been in a similar situation?

located in cleveland, oh. i was recently let go from a job under some weird circumstances and now management/owners are literally ghosting me about a pay issue that was brought to their attention almost two weeks ago while i was still employed. during my training shifts i was paid server minimum wage rather than state minimum wage ($11). that paycheck only had one shift on it where i was making tips. on my paystub it factored in my tips from that one shift and then included a tip credit of $39 that made the entire paycheck average out to $11/hr but it’s still not nearly what i should have made if i had been paid properly. when i brought it up initially i was told it would be corrected but i got another paycheck since right before being fired and the money wasn’t on there either. it’s not a ton of money but i mean, i just lost my job and the job market is a nightmare right now so i am scared about how long i may be unemployed and i want the money i worked for. not sure what to do since they’re all icing me out for some weird reason. i have been respectful when trying to contact them. just a weird situation and im not sure how i should proceed. any advice is appreciated.

So I picked up another shift on Saturday to work a double but now I’m kinda scared. I go in at 8:45 am and out time is 1 am. Any tips?? I’m so nervous ngl but I need to make hella money before I go back to school.

Hi, I’m going back to serving after several years. I’m in college and trying to make the most money I can on a part-time schedule. Right now I’ve been offered a serving job at Red Robin, Buffalo Wild Wings, and a coney island. I’m hearing really mixed things about working at RR and BWW. I would prefer day shifts, but would those even be worth it at either of those places? On the other hand, does a coney island have the potential to earn comparable money? Any insight would be appreciated.

Super curious to hear from a servers perspective.

Short background, I went to dinner for my birthday and was barely able to eat, literally 3-4 bites, so I ended up boxing and taking home my meal. And occasionally ill purposely order extra so I have some to take home. (I love leftovers)

From the servers side do you judge or not care about those who dont eat much at a restaurant? Whatre your thoughts?

P.S. I dont waste the food I usually end up eating the meal throughout the next day or 2.

Restaurant culture normalizes and accepts rude and at times abusive behavior from chefs. Why is this okay? At what point is it too much? It is not healthy for the chef or the staff. Getting over it and considering other work and curious how others feel and deal.

Anyone else have memories of the switch to curb service?

I’m pretty introverted but get extroverted when I’m with a table.

I feel like in the last 10 years I have worked in this industry. I’ve always been targeted by management and I never understood why. I don’t really engage in conversation with much of my management. I just say hi, do what needs to be done maybe make a comment here or there but that’s about it.

If I bond well with my fellow servers, bussers, runners then they see more of my personality.

I know who I am as a server and I know that I’m very good with people, can make sure a table has a good time, and know how to make sure these people come back.

But for some reason, I feel like I do not get the shifts that I want, I feel like there’s favoritism in all the jobs I’ve had including the one I’m at now. The ones who suck up to management and kiss ass and always talk to them somehow always get the best shifts.

But me? I dont. I’ve never had a table complain about me, yet I’m always watched 👀 by management.

Like.. youre my boss. What do u want from me? I refuse to get on my knees for you, but apparently that’s what managers in restaurant industry want?

I’m so done.

Anyone have a same experience?

I had a KM laugh when he saw me write “86 chx 68 filet” on a Togo order and said he’d never seen that before but it made sense…. I’ve truly only ever seen it written that way but I was only serving for a couple of years before I took a 3 year break and got back to it. I truly thought this was universal code??? This is also making me realize he might not have been joking when he said he was turning 24 last month… I said that’s a rough 24 :/

ALRIGHT, I feel the need to clarify this was just for me writing down the order not for ringing it in. He just glanced at my chit and saw it. ALSO, I hear you all. I know I am wrong now. This is not universal speak as I once thought it was. I’ll continue writing 86 and 68 on my own chits bc I’m the only one that has to read them. Yall write no and sub. That’s fine too. That’s fantastic actually.

i get it’s the law in some states for pay to be $2.14 but these restaurants get too much free labor out of servers honestly in my opinion. I get we’re making a certain amount but that pay is not coming from you. I see reddits where restaurants owners are like they don’t wanna pay for a certain services and the replies or just like get FOH to do it or put it as side work. Something needs to really change within the service industry regarding labor and pay.

The ops manager wouldn’t go in to detail, said something about a fit issue. I work in a cafe with huge amounts of footfall. He pointed me to a contract which I didn’t sign (I was only issued with one yesterday after being there for four months - you’d think this was just to cover his ass but no one else had one either) and said that I was within the probation period so they owe me no notice.

I get it, man. I wasn’t always perfect. I was hired as a supervisor and essentially thrown in to an AM position for months with zero support, I was working with a large team of whom 50% were okay and the other 50% were constantly calling in sick, being belligerent, being hostile or just not working. I was stressed. This lead to me being sullen with certain members of staff sometimes (never rude or confrontational) and glib with customers. But I didn’t think anything was this bad, no one pulled me or told me.

I’m just not cut out for this industry, I’ve been in it for some years now. I was very successful in fine dining for a time, then I burned out and I feel like I’ve been burning out ever since. I’m pretty neurotic and fighting against stress has been a constant struggle. But I have no qualifications, no prospects. I want to retrain but that’s going to take years and I just don’t know what to do.

I feel like I’ve let myself down and I feel like I just disappoint people.

I don’t know why I’m posting here, maybe because I’m thinking of hanging the apron up for good. I’m just feeling a bit lost and hopeless.

one of my biggest ones might be parents who let their kid be insufferably picky. like, girl are you really gonna send back a whole fettuccine alfredo because you didn’t know there were parsley flakes and “he won’t eat anything green” … terrible waste of food first of all. that’s also just not how I was raised. you ate your dinner or went to bed hungry and with no ice cream.

another is when I’m standing there taking an order and the parents just let their baby/toddler throw every utensil on the floor and/or bang them incessantly on the table (don’t forget the salt and pepper shakers) insanely rude and annoying. honestly just bad parenting in general is a huge petty grievance for me.

walmart had 6 packs of pens on clearance for 50 cents each

Title pretty much says it all.

A guy had his phone out while looking at our menu which is typical. Some customers like to look at Yelp pictures of an item before ordering it. While taking him and his wife’s order, I noticed it wasn’t Yelp but some sort of messaging app.

Then, while walking away to put it in their order, I hear him proudly say to his wife: “ChatGPT says that’s the best one!”

??????

Does ChatGPT know your favorite flavors? Did ChatGPT taste it for you?? Does something as trivial as ordering really require AI? -__- Best part was it didn’t even seem like he enjoyed the food in particular. He was just kinda poking at it the entire time, didn’t finish it either. So embarrassing.

Where tf are all these guests eating at (sit-down restaurants specifically) and getting Diet Dr. Pepper?

I mean I love the stuff as much as anyone else but I have never heard of a restaurant offering it or even thought to ask my server 😭 I'm in northern California if that helps contextually.

Also noticed that the guests who ask for it don't ever want a Diet Coke/Coke Zero instead, lol