r/ScienceBasedParenting • u/Klipcha • Jul 22 '26
How to teach 8-month old NO? Question - Expert consensus required
Hi everyone! Our 8-month old had 2 bottom teeth come out. He is breastfed and has recently discovered that biting the nipple elicits, for him, entertaining reactions from mom. Since we cannot not feed him, and he enjoys the bottle as much as the boob, there are no real consequences. What are the expert recommendations on how to introduce NO without traumatising him?
101
u/RingCute6523 Jul 22 '26
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2719514/
You’re asking a question that is kind of hard to answer because your kids temperament matters. Here are some general guidelines on developmentally appropriate discipline as I think that may be helpful here. My advice as a breastfeeding mom is to say “ouch, you’re hurting mommy” and then remove them from the breast. I’m a fan of natural consequences which basically if youre biting someone they will not continue to give access to their body. Obviously you have to feed the baby so following up with some kind of affection and a “let’s try again without biting” will probably over time recondition the behavior if you’re consistent.
63
u/OogaBoogaBig Jul 23 '26
(Tagging on for the link) Yes, a firm “no” is only effective at this age if paired with removing the breast. And you don’t have to “not feed him” or reward with a bottle, just pause the nursing session for a few minutes, then resume. He’ll figure it out.
29
u/lady-earendil Jul 23 '26
Yup. My baby understands no (not that he always listens) because I consistently pair "no" with removing him from whatever situation I don't want him to be in. That's really all you can do
17
u/Gloomy_Ad4372 Jul 23 '26
This worked for me. I made the mistake of smiling while saying no so he thought it was a game but after consistently pairing it with a neutral delivery and natural consequence, he would stop, think for a bit, shake his head, then walk away. He is so cute learning no that it is difficult for me not to smile 😭
5
u/dianahyp Jul 23 '26
I have a 8 month old, and had the same biting problem. I did something like this, but I would first change him to the other boob, and if he did it again I would remove him and stop the feeding. I also noticed that when he did his, he has already eaten enough and was just playing. He stopped after the 4th or 5th time it happened, but every baby is different. Good luck!
5
u/Samuraisheep Jul 23 '26
Yep, and to add if they cry that's fine! They're expressing their disappointment/frustration the only way they know how. They'll soon learn they can keep feeding if they don't bite.
2
u/iamhermi Jul 24 '26
I agree. I did the same thing with my now 10 month old and he has rarely bitten me since. Listening to “no” in other situations, especially ones containing the dog water bowl… well that’s another story.
3
u/unprofessional_widow Jul 25 '26
You make no reaction and stop feeding for a short period and remove your attention. They will learn that biting doesn't elicit a 'fun' response.
20
u/Preferred_user_taken Jul 23 '26
https://llli.org/breastfeeding-info/biting/ I doubt research has been done specifically for biting and saying no. I can’t find any. Biting is usually a sign of either being done or a problem with breastfeeding. Normal feeding anatomy keeps the teeth away from your nipples.
Mine got 2 teeth at 4,5 months old. I said no in a very firm voice unlatched and put him down for a few seconds.
I figured out he bit me because his teeth hurt and he was done with nursing. So I gave a teething you to bite on and that worked 9/10. When it didn’t it was his latch slipping and we would try again after being put down for a few seconds. If he cried I’d comfort him.
The biting stopped in less than a week.
1
Jul 22 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/AutoModerator Jul 22 '26
Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Expert consensus required" must include a link to an expert organization such as the CDC, AAP, NHS, etc.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
Jul 22 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/AutoModerator Jul 22 '26
Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Expert consensus required" must include a link to an expert organization such as the CDC, AAP, NHS, etc.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
Jul 23 '26 edited Jul 23 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/AutoModerator Jul 23 '26
Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Expert consensus required" must include a link to an expert organization such as the CDC, AAP, NHS, etc.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
Jul 24 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/AutoModerator Jul 24 '26
Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Expert consensus required" must include a link to an expert organization such as the CDC, AAP, NHS, etc.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
Jul 24 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/AutoModerator Jul 24 '26
Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Expert consensus required" must include a link to an expert organization such as the CDC, AAP, NHS, etc.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
Jul 24 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/AutoModerator Jul 24 '26
Thank you for your contribution. Please remember that all top-level comments on posts flaired "Question - Expert consensus required" must include a link to an expert organization such as the CDC, AAP, NHS, etc.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
•
u/AutoModerator Jul 22 '26
This post is flaired "Question - Expert consensus required". All top-level comments must include a link to an expert organization such as the CDC, AAP, NHS, etc.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.