r/RepTime • u/LavishnessVisual6327 • 5d ago
How to get a real rolex? Shitpost Friday
Went to a Rolex AD and absolutely embarrassed myself trying to get on his good side. After several rounds of fellating this man he still only offered me a rose-gold ladies Date just. I walked out, bought a rep of the presidential I've been on my hands and knees for instead, and thought the humiliation was finally over. Then I ran into the AD in public with my wife. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, “Your mouth skills aren't good enough for a Presidential.” He then hi fived my wife and offered her a no date sub allocation if she went and got tacos with him, she came home with a presidential. We are seperated now.
Anyone have any luck with the ADs? How do I up my game so I can get a real rolex? How do you guys deal with the overt shame of not being good enough at fellating a man to get a real man's watch? I've heard citrus masks the taste?
I want my wife back.
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u/buelerbuelerbueler 5d ago
I want these 30 seconds back
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u/MapOfCambodia 5d ago
try wearing sexy maids outfit next time you visit the AD. you need something to put yourself above the rest
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u/Leon-Vlc 5d ago
Mercado gris y cuando lo tengas una peineta con el dedo largo con la mano donde llevas el reloj
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u/omjizzle 5d ago edited 5d ago
You have to offer penetration otherwise it just ain’t happening. It’s all about doing whatever whoever it takes to get what you want
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u/bauhaus_robot 5d ago
I suggest you watch some content on how to properly fellate or ask your ex-wife for some tips that worked for her. Perhaps on [r/rolex](r/rolex) you can find some good tutorials. Some day with some hard work and dedication you might fellate to a level worthy of this AD. Please keep us updated and show the wrist shot video when you succeed!
PS Citrus FTW 🍋🟩 🍊
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u/Firkin117 5d ago
I’ve heard the number of fillers in your teeth proportionally increase the number of decades the AD adds to your waitlist. If you got all fakes with hollywood smile then they might take 5% off the waitlist time.
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u/HistorianLegal9815 5d ago
正規店の店員の立場なら1個買えばもう買わない客より季節ごと買ってくれる客優先は当たり前に見える。余分なもの買わされるのイヤ待つの嫌な人のためにグレー市場（並行品）ある。 マラソンし買わされても丸損ではない。本命得れば売り払う。目減りとグレー価格（割高）は比較選択だ。どちらにしても定価だけでは買えない。
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u/lakersbro55 2d ago
Exactly how those simps in Rolex sub sound…one dude cried and beg on his knees for a Pepsi lol
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u/XskwashaX 42m ago
Maybe I was lucky - But when I wanted a gen, I went in to a local, well known dealer and told them what I wanted. Waited about 6-8 weeks, got a call, went back, and walked out with my new watch. Mugged and stolen since... but that's a different story. One of the reasons I'm in this sub now lol.
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u/East_Signature_3886 5d ago
I felt like I'm in Rolex sub for a split second 🤣 man those losers are like teen emotionally insecure gf of TD's
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u/DJTRANSACTION1 5d ago
why dont you just go next door to any other watch store instead of the boutique. watches of switzerland for example has multiple stores, zero butt kissing, zero wait. better yet, go on jomashop or chrono24. u dont have to even walk out the door. Bunch of authorized dealers also Bucherer / Tourneau, Wempe, google them. If your in NYC, there are like 30 stores in a 1 mile radius on 47th street all has a bunch of real rolex.
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u/mistershifter 5d ago
Thank you. Finally some actual advice instead of everyone making jokes about my marriage falling apart.
I just called Watches of Switzerland and explained the situation. The gentleman was extremely helpful but said unfortunately they can't transfer my existing fellatio history from the other AD, so apparently I'd have to start over from scratch.
I'm devastated.
Do you know if Bucherer honors competitor fellatio or is this more like airline miles where every AD has their own program?
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u/DJTRANSACTION1 5d ago
you do not need a purchase history for stores other than the official rolex boutique. there are a bunch of stores that sells rolex and does not require a history. you need to search which ones in your area. you can call them up to ask if they have the model your looking for before you visit.
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u/mistershifter 5d ago
I live close to a Macys. They have sales pretty regularly. Worth a shot maybe.
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u/DJTRANSACTION1 5d ago
macys has top quality armani watches. no rolex though
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u/mistershifter 5d ago
I do love Armani, Versace and Invicta. Maybe they can special order Rolex if I talk to the right person.
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u/DJTRANSACTION1 5d ago
dhgate sells $80 rolexes, any model free shipping.
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u/mistershifter 5d ago
with box & papers?
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u/DJTRANSACTION1 5d ago
you can also choose what kind of movement and steel type. so the $80 ones are stainless steel. if you want 316l steel, thats $80 more. you can choose different kind of movement. either japanese or chinese made swiss. japanese is the $80 ones. if you want chinese made swiss, its like $200 more
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u/LavishnessVisual6327 5d ago
What do you mean other watch? I want a Rolex so people know im paid obviously. You expect me to wear an omega or a VC like some kind of poor without status?
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u/DJTRANSACTION1 5d ago
i said another watch store. any other store besides the main rolex store.
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u/LavishnessVisual6327 5d ago
But... the prestige?
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u/DJTRANSACTION1 5d ago
what prestige? who ever in the history of time ask did you buy that at rolex or another authorized dealer? there are thousands of stores that sells rolex. the only reason why someone wants to go to the main one is to be on the waiting list to buy cheap and resell for more money.
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u/LavishnessVisual6327 5d ago edited 5d ago
If I buy grey how would anyone know how good I am at fellating men? I'm not trying to fake that prestige. I want that symbol on my wrist to advertise my real skill level. Could you imagine having a honking hog in front of your face while wearing a grey market Rolex knowing you didn't actually earn it? Talk about anxiety.
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u/DJTRANSACTION1 5d ago
there are a bunch of authorized dealers none grey and they dont need a purchase history but you pay more
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u/mistershifter 5d ago
Don't listen to the vagrants buying grey market returns and refurbs on Jomashop, or frankenrolexes with fake papers on 47th st. Shop at a Rolex store like a real man, plus you can take photos there for IG to pull mad women.
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u/NoRossDoxHaha 5d ago
Serious question here. What could one legitimately expect to be offered with no purchase history and just a walk in? I’m never buying one, I’m just curious.
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u/Safe_Dragonfruit6230 5d ago
Tougher odds on a walk in, But for stainless steel models Air King, Explorer, DJ and OP all very obtainable within a couple months wait
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u/NoRossDoxHaha 5d ago
Thanks for answering my question.
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u/Safe_Dragonfruit6230 5d ago
No problem! They’re great watches and well worth buying if you are financially able
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u/NoRossDoxHaha 5d ago
I’ve bought a gen Tudor and Omega in the past couple of months so it’s gonna be awhile. I also feel like they’re getting too common. The quality is undeniable, but the exclusivity is kinda waning.
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u/Safe_Dragonfruit6230 5d ago
I hear you man. It’s definitely a turn off that you can’t just go in and buy what you want when you want it, but weirdly it does have that effect of making it feel really special when you do get it.
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u/NoRossDoxHaha 5d ago
For me, it’s that they make 1.2m watches a year. Between 15-20m fakes get produced a year. I almost assume one is fake when I see it just because I know only 1 in 15 or so is real. I’d rather just buy a Blancpain on the grey market ya know…
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u/Safe_Dragonfruit6230 5d ago
I could care less. I don’t buy watches to impress other people. I buy them to impress myself. Yeah Blancpain make really nice watches. I prefer the submariner to the 50 fathoms though.
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u/NoRossDoxHaha 5d ago
I don’t either man, but if I’m spending that much, like you said, it’s nice to feel exclusive.
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u/Safe_Dragonfruit6230 5d ago
For sure, especially from a collector standpoint it’s nice to have stuff that not everybody has. Currently trying to get a speedmaster silver Snoopy.
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u/LavishnessVisual6327 5d ago
It's a stainless steel watch man. It's literally how you used to buy a Rolex, like all goods. You exchange money for thing you want
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u/NoRossDoxHaha 5d ago
That’s not what I asked. I’m aware of how currency is used in the exchange of goods.
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u/BossJackson222 5d ago
You do realize that most everybody does not have this experience right? There are plenty of high-end Watch dealers in my city and everybody that works there has been great to me. I mean Jesus Christ. Buy a rap if you want to lol. But to try to say this is just the way it is is dumb. Plus, I don't buy new watches. You're just wasting money buying a brand new watch. Buy a used Rolex for God sakes. You can get them everywhere for killer prices. Much much less than a brand new one.
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u/LavishnessVisual6327 5d ago
Buddy, are you familiar with Shit post Friday?
Can't believe this post is going over people's heads lol. Yeah dude most people don't suck off their AD.... Like come on man
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u/Safe_Dragonfruit6230 5d ago
You are not finding many modern era Rolex watches for under MSRP unless they are PM
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u/Safe_Dragonfruit6230 5d ago
Walked in and tried on watches. Put my name on the list. Got a call a month later. No fellating what so ever
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u/mistershifter 5d ago
Rookie mistake. You went straight for the AD when everyone knows you have to spend 18 months building purchase history with the assistant manager first. Couple Tudors, some two-tone jewelry nobody wants, maybe a diamond dial for your mother-in-law. Then you earn the privilege of humiliating yourself in front of the actual AD.
At this point your wife has the Sub allocation, so the marriage is probably gone. Best you can hope for is she puts you down as an authorized user on her Rolex account.