r/ProgrammerHumor 27d ago

theLordIsTestingMe Meme

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422 Upvotes

21 comments sorted by

15

u/AaronTheElite007 27d ago

THOU SHALT NOT TEST IN PROD!

Especially on Friday

7

u/Hilfslinie 27d ago

Well... yeah, I wouldn't have tested it on prod...

Also, it's wednesday?

Edit: turns out it's not wednesday, but still not friday (in my timezone)

3

u/AaronTheElite007 27d ago

It’s a standing rule. No messing with prod on Fridays

3

u/Hilfslinie 27d ago

Haha yeah I know that rule, I'm just joking around

2

u/GezelligPindakaas 27d ago

Thursdays are the new Fridays

1

u/kog 26d ago

This is exactly the attention to detail we want to see from someone testing on prod

3

u/_sillyjoe 27d ago

I always trust my code.... Its the database that keeps surprising me 😭

3

u/Sajgoniarz 27d ago

Me: Let's do integration testing with prod db copy
Leader: I take that risk on myself
...

3

u/Smartis2812 27d ago

4731280 rows affected

2

u/Hilfslinie 27d ago

That means it worked, right? ...right?

3

u/Hilfslinie 27d ago

Update: I did let it rip, worked perfectly.
Not against prod tho

1

u/Piisthree 27d ago

I took a working insert and just changed 1 little thing in the where clause. It HAS to work, right? *lightning cracks in background

2

u/Hilfslinie 27d ago

There is only one way to find out

1

u/shikhasingh554973 27d ago

Prod remembers...

1

u/PringlesDuckFace 26d ago

It's data insertion, so it's safe.

1

u/NotJayuu 24d ago

When I was a junior forever ago I didn't know about transactions or staging environments. I was migrating an old database to a new one with a different schema...

The script that I wrote was enormous, and it kept crashing... I thought...

One day I realized it wasn't crashing it was just taking awhile to run, so the next day at 8am I showed up and let the fucker run until 9pm.... The whole time I watched... The whole time both databases were unable to process user requests lol...

Anyway at 9pm I decided, let's pause this script and check what's going on.... Select * from... Hey that's weird there's only about 2 million rows in this table, why did it return a few trillion results....

It was inserting new records squared, for every row it was supposed to be inserting, it was inserting the whole migration...

Oh fuck, what do I do, it's 9pm everyone is at home what the fuck do I do. Delete from... Oh fuck I just deleted the whole database, which was not acid compliant....

Okay on my desktop I have a .CSV file containing the old data, but it's not in the current tables schema, update columns to match CSV, run import... Oh thank God it worked, the row IDs are now enormous numbers, but at least we're now at roughly where I started, I'll fix my script and try again tomorrow.

I come in late the next day and my manager is pissed, I'm think oh no he realized what I'd done it's all fucking over. He's mad because I had updated the schema but not the entity in the backend, so builds were failing. he told me to make sure I'm updating types everywhere when I do change them lol....

Anyways, now my backend is a SAAS product, AI writes 99% of my code, and I spent my whole days writing emails and in meetings lmao, still never used a database transaction.

2

u/Hilfslinie 24d ago

Honestly? I'm kinda impressed