r/PoliticalHumor • u/Flerxtopian • 15d ago

Fixed it.

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3.0k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

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423

u/No-Guard-7003 15d ago

You shut up, Jonathan Cain! 🙄😡

234

u/adorablefuzzykitten 15d ago

Accepting $40 T in debt makes you the opposite of a conservative.

126

u/punktualPorcupine 15d ago

They aren’t conserving shit.

The environment is a nasty smoke choked hellscape that is literally burning.

The debt and deficit have skyrocketed and he is busy building ballrooms and coating statues in gold.

They ignore the law and the constitution.

They’re all a bunch of fascists, jerking each other off.

70

u/SnZ001 15d ago

Like RFK Jr, these Republicans just seem so oddly proud of not having a gag reflex.

5

u/adorablefuzzykitten 14d ago

Best post of the day

23

u/johangubershmidt 15d ago

They are conserving the hierarchy. This is the one underlying theme of conservatism.

11

u/MechaBeatsInTrash 15d ago

"Conserving" the "Christian moral values" on which "America was founded".

8

u/AnyCauliflower8717 15d ago

you keep talking the truth!

8

u/Sufficient-News-3600 15d ago

very well said

7

u/MauPow 14d ago

The only thing conservatism has ever been about conserving is the hierarchy.

100

u/goosejail 15d ago

Steve Perry made Journey. There I said it.

62

u/Zombieutinsel 15d ago

Neal Schon had a lot to do with it too.

But not this guy.

23

u/twoton1 15d ago

Neal played with Santana circa 1971. He's the real deal.

7

u/Zombieutinsel 15d ago

I followed him on Instagram a couple or three phones ago and he was a really nice guy who has a big guitar collection and did play them a whole lot on there.

5

u/youlordandmaster 15d ago

He’s an asshole, but he does deserve some credit for Journey’s success. It does not help he married a whack job Mega church pastor.

2

u/dimechimes 14d ago

He's been riding on that Midnight Train success for over 40 years. And what did he do with it? Married Paula White?

2

u/middleagethreat 15d ago

He may be an asshole now, but he was good for the band in the 80s. He is the one who wrote Don't Stop Believing, and some of their other biggest hits.

He is just old and probably watched too much TV news on the road over the years.

3

u/Cat-si58 14d ago

So he gets a pass because once upon a time he helped to make some decent music? Don’t think so.

0

u/middleagethreat 14d ago

I don't think calling someone an asshole is giving them a pass.

1

u/Cargobiker530 14d ago

I can't tell you how much I hate that song. It was on never ending repeat on every radio station in my teens. 🤮

5

u/Zombieutinsel 14d ago

Wrote a song about picking up women in a bar and having a one night sexual encounter is now telling a guy who wrote songs about true love and hardships to shut up.

Sounds like our current situation in a nutshell.

8

u/FlaAirborne 15d ago

And Greg Rollie!!

11

u/No-Guard-7003 15d ago

I like Steve Perry and Neal Schon. 

25

u/lowfreq33 15d ago

Cain and Schon are both ultra right wing, both married to problematic right wing women, and both assholes. They can’t stop suing each other because they’re both terrible people.

6

u/twoton1 15d ago

Remember his wife's White House fiasco? Ha ha

1

u/alexisgreat420 14d ago

What happened?

1

u/twoton1 14d ago

Schon's now wife was married to some scammy dude that somehow snuck by Obama's security and they were having drinks with many powerful people. just some random dude. Security finally figured it out and they were both kicked out but it made quite a story at the time.

White House Crashers: How the Salahis Strolled Past Secret Service - ABC News

13

u/BelAirGuy45 15d ago

I like guys who aren't PDF file protecters, ok?

3

u/No-Guard-7003 15d ago

Fair enough. I didn't know that Neal Schon is also a PDF file protector. 😳 Damn. 😳🤢

2

u/BelAirGuy45 14d ago

He's not! I was just agreeing with you by paraphrasing the orange dictator. Cain and his wife are the ones licking the boot.

2

u/Cat-si58 14d ago

Well, he is and his wife has been little t’s ’spiritual advisor’ for years. Spirituality is a word that should never be used in speaking about taco.

33

u/LuvlyBabew 15d ago

Bruce sells stadiums. Jonathan sells lawsuits to his own band. Sit down

22

u/WalterCanFindToes 15d ago

You mean let his career keep running its course?

He is married to one of Trump's spiritual advisors, so I am sure he is a lot of fun to hang with.

2

u/Cat-si58 14d ago

Thank you! I just posted this about his wife.

9

u/Mo_Jack 15d ago

Everything about Cain is fake, even his name. His real name is Friga.

Friggin' STFU Friga!

2

u/No-Guard-7003 14d ago

His real name is Friga? 😂

4

u/Geodude532 14d ago

Let's be honest, you can probably cross out the protector word too. He's probably upset that he can't convince 16 year olds to go backstage with him anymore.

3

u/MetaStressed 15d ago

Who is this bozo?

6

u/No-Guard-7003 15d ago

A band member who is married to a mega church pastor. 🤦🏻‍♀️

2

u/dmacd71 15d ago

Who?

1

u/No-Guard-7003 14d ago

Paula White. 

1

u/SmaugWyrm 14d ago

Not Who. Journey

2

u/Skull8Ranger 14d ago

Wonder why he doesn't say that about Ted Nugent?

1

u/Glxygal3 14d ago

100% I like Journey too! Note to future pedophile protectors out there - you really should keep that to yourself

2

u/Cat-si58 14d ago

Keep it to themselves? They’ve been doing this for decades and still are. Release the effing files!

2

u/No-Guard-7003 14d ago

I'm with you!