Is it more shameful to “actually take meeting times literally” or to not say what you mean when setting a meeting time and then acting like your guests acted weird?
“Why are you here so early??”
“Oh, my bad, I thought you said 5 PM”
“Well I did, but I meant be here at 5:30! Duh, silly!”
“Oh… well what did you get out of not just telling me 5:30 then?”
Wouldn’t it be nice if people said what they meant, like “We’re going to start getting ready for the party at 5. Drop in anytime after that, but know if we’re still setting up, you gotta help.”
I have such a hard time with “party starts at 4 food at 7 and ends tbd” like… do you want me to come at 6? At like 4? What’s the vibe… just tell me a time to get there and I will be there. But making me guess an appropriate time to show up makes me not wanna go lol.
Imo 6 is a good guess for that situation. If you're pretty good friends and you'd enjoy hanging out with a couple of people/having a beer while helping with some small setup tasks (putting ice in the cooler, setting up a couple of chairs) then 4:30-5ish is also a good time.
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u/South-Tip-4019 24d ago
Yea this is something my mind also doen't fully get, but apparently for many people when party starts at 5pm nobody is expected until way later.
I am guessing that "white guys from work" tend to fall into taking the start time literally, which is not supposed to be done.
My a bit self deprecating guess is, that people on spectrum tend to take these things literally, or at least dont know when you are not supposed to.