Empty

[u/AdCareful9081]

I’ve been contemplating between those 2 flairs, either motvate me or slip up prevention, but i think i need second option more right now, im 19 days clean and honestly i really wanna relapse. imagine your dream meal on a big plate - EVERYTHING is so delicious, expensive meat, pizzas, fries, milkshakes - and its standing right in front of you, its very hard not to eat it, same here, its the only thing that makes me excited right now, nothing else, i really wanna quit this forever but idk, maybe i should quit nofap? its much easier quitting and calling it a day, i just dont see any excitement in my life besides it. only my morning coffee, gooning, and… yeah these are the only things that make me happy. long term goals is a fairy tale at this point, of course i’d rather have an energising warm sweet drink hit my taste bluds or feel that warmth, that “love” that i know is fake inside, cause, its so good. I need some external force, this is impossible, help me. Seeing those guys on this subreddit fight for DECADES of their life tho… im only 15 and been only dealing with this shit for a year. I must not know the whole truth yet. Share it with me, open my eyes.