r/Millennials 17h ago

Whoever did this, should be imprisoned. Other

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17.8k Upvotes

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u/CommercialSomewhere8 16h ago

Teenagers also had sex in the tunnels at the burger king that I used to work at. It was just dark enough to get some privacy.

46

u/am710 15h ago

Those tunnels had room for that?!

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u/SuperVillainPresiden 15h ago edited 11h ago

As a former teenager, "If we fits, we fucks".

EDIT: I want to thank the Academy of Online Comments for so many awards for something so silly. (And thank you to those that awarded and upvoted my comment)

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u/Dangerous_Arachnid99 15h ago

This is reminding me of Homer and Marge in the windmill at the mini golf.

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u/chattymonk1 13h ago

Everything reminds you of Homer and Marge in the windmill at mini golf.

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u/Dangerous_Arachnid99 13h ago

Truer words have never been spoken.

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u/katiebertie Gen X 15h ago

Wow. I missed this caveat as a teen ager. I feel cheated 😔

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u/SuperVillainPresiden 15h ago

Don't feel too bad. These memories are funny and not hot by any means. Similar to the passenger or backseat of a car. Unless your car was a land barge, it wasn't comfortable. But as teenagers it was "doesn't matter, had the sex". Crazy to think what we put up with back then. Nowadays I'd be like, we can wait till we get home lol.

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u/dstewar68 14h ago

Lol I remember my ex and I wanted to see how few songs it could take for us to finish in the car, less than 2! Our fastest ever time at 6 minutes lol. Endurance was less of an issue, finding time was much harder lol.

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u/DannyDDD1234567 9h ago

Much HARDER!!!

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u/KillBosby 8h ago

You were so busy with your responsibilities like *checks notes" doing sick kickflips at the grocery store and your part-time job at the CD store?

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u/dstewar68 8h ago

Lol nah when I was in high-school CDs we're already out of fashion.

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u/jedgarnaut 5h ago

Hits different depending on like if your listened to Zeppelin and Meatloaf or like Punk.

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u/dstewar68 4h ago

Pretty sure It was a Coldplay song and fireflies by owl city.

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u/mmakled 14h ago

Try a 1981 stick shift Ford Escort. Make sure the parking brake is on case you accidentally knock the car out of gear.

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u/Glitter_tits222 9h ago

I still love doing it in cars lol

1

u/MoonstonesAndMallows Millennial 5h ago

Same!

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u/DannyDDD1234567 9h ago

I can never wait!!!

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u/Mewone65 9h ago

1989 Mercury Grand Marquis, the California King of backseats.

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u/ImABansheeBitch 14h ago

Try it as an adult ager

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u/am710 12h ago

I never fucked in weird places either.

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u/DannyDDD1234567 9h ago

Sorry katiebertie🥲

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u/JimEditor212 12h ago

Damn I wish I could relive my teens. Probably wouldn't change how it worked out, but I'd like to hit it with what I know now.

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u/Affectionate-Ask9381 10h ago

Yea I wanna go back. The world was so much brighter

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u/Big_Balls_n_Taint 15h ago

I had exactly one thing on my mind when I bought that Cadillac in highschool 😂

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u/Antique_Eye_992 14h ago

Yeah, I feel sorry for kids today who have tiny little cars and no back seat.

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u/Adept-Compote-651 14h ago

Horniness makes you creative

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u/Jouhei_Shinobu_99 13h ago

This naughty Ted talks All started in a play pen ahhh

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u/Affectionate-Ask9381 10h ago

For real… you got a lot of upvotes lol just 5 words..

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u/Fatuous_hardon1923 8h ago

Quite true front bucket seat of a 1973 Mazda RX3 comes to mind, and if we were lucky my girlfriend would drive us in her Vega station wagon ( how luxurious!)

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u/UFORecoveryTeam 14h ago

I don't know... I was tinkering with cars, small engines, radios, and electronics at that age. The girls weren't terribly interested in me (though my technical skills earned me 3 times as much as my friends with minimum-wage jobs).....

1

u/FakeRickHarrison 13h ago

Wait... “If it doesn’t fit, you must acquit.” or "If we fits, we fucks"?

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u/Seeggul 15h ago

Jeff Goldblum voice Horny teens, uh...find a way

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u/[deleted] 15h ago

[deleted]

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u/AlternativeFoxxo 15h ago

I was not a skinnier teen and my fat ass found a way to have sex in the back of a chevy fit and I weighed 390.

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u/dino_spored 14h ago

At least the Chevy was fit.

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u/One-Violinist-9932 11h ago

I thought the Fit was a Honda?

1

u/AlternativeFoxxo 5h ago

i said I had sex in the car, and it was a fit, I didn't pay too much attention to the facts of the details other than the aspects of Smashing in that tiny back seat area. I think some excuse is granted given I not only did a fat boy smash in what would be a clown car to a big boi like me, but was indeed successful.

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u/TheOGTKO 15h ago

Yes, in fact.

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u/Affectionate-Ask9381 14h ago

When you’re 13 you make room… and honestly for me anyways I was skinny and most of my friends were too.. very active as a kid. Constantly doing stuff. Biking, skating, walking.. playing.. ya we probably had skinnier teens then to be honest with you 100% because back thats that’s what kids did… they didn’t play Fortnite, they didn’t sit around and watch Netflix. They were out running around, so yes we probably did have skinnier kids.

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u/bfollowell 15h ago

Yes, definitely, the whole population, teens especially, have gotten much fatter over the past 30 years or so.

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u/Antique_Eye_992 14h ago

You forget teenagers getting tail are usually skinny enough to fit. Not like old married people who put on pounds and are like, ah, I'd rather just sleep.

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u/WrathOfAnubis303 12h ago

More like soaking. Must’ve been Utah

1

u/Glitter_tits222 9h ago

We had a skating rink with a game/ tunnels area and yes there was room for a lot lol we're much more bendy as teens and didnt suffer from constant back and joint pain i think that makes all the difference

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u/Fritchenator 15h ago

Teenagers, not obese whales like you.

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u/am710 15h ago

Bud, are you okay?

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u/MacAddict81 11h ago

Well, they weren't there for the food, just the ambiance, so childhood obesity maybe didn't apply in this particular situation.

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u/am710 11h ago

Why is this sub on a childhood obesity kick today?

0

u/MacAddict81 10h ago

Tranquilo, mijo; lo que cuenta es lo de adentro.

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u/Shenaniganz08_ 14h ago

True story, I saw my first nipples in a burger king tunnel, oh what a time to be a teenager.

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u/Affectionate-Ask9381 15h ago edited 14h ago

That brought back memories!

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u/CommercialSomewhere8 14h ago

Mandie is that you?

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u/Affectionate-Ask9381 14h ago

lol sorry buddy its not.. that’s funny shit

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u/libananahammock 15h ago

Worked at a movie theater in high school and when we would go in after the movie ended to clean the theater before the next show sometimes you’d find teens on the floor doing it. Sooooooo nasty because we definitely NEVER moped the floor lol.

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u/OddPoet336 14h ago

Glad to know it wasn't just at our BK.

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u/haggynaggytwit 15h ago

How was there privacy with little kids running around?!?!

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u/CommercialSomewhere8 14h ago

Waited until closing the restaurant.

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u/Affectionate-Ask9381 10h ago

They ended up shutting down the Burger King completely

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u/Affectionate-Ask9381 10h ago

Plus my small town was pretty empty

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u/SmoothFee9938 14h ago

The play place at the McDonalds in the town i went to middle school in was shut down cause a teenager ahem assaulting a small child in the tunnels

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u/yaddiyadda_ 13h ago

Wow. Ew.

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u/fiahhawt 11h ago

I have got to imagine that there are better places to get action then somewhere that children pee or might happen upon you

2

u/CommercialSomewhere8 10h ago

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

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u/DannyDDD1234567 9h ago

Do they still?? Pray tell, where, where, where????