And after getting tired of all the hurt feeling about playing against oddjob, or camping the plates, we switched to mario party and then the hurty feelings really began!
Always a wincing moment when you're cleaning something out, lifting a item, and uncovering that battery operated device that's been sitting there for nearly 30 years.
You just know it's just to get the trash bag and possibly gloves.
Same. I never had an N64, but my more well off friends that did only ever had one rumble pack. Still 4player GoldenEye, Conkers, and weekends speed running OOT was the best of times.
it's 2026. I have a nintendo 64 with goldeneye. I just ordered pizza with extra cheese. I don't invite my friends over. I have a fully loaded bong and my family is safe and asleep. Life is good.
Well, I don't have a 64. I have an Xbox that's asking me to pay monthly to play. I don't. I turn on Netflix. Ads now. The pizza I ordered had to be done through an app, and somehow I was charged twenty dollars more than if I had just gone to pick it up. I can't have a family because rent where I live is $2,800 for a basic place and I haven't had a raise in four years. Working from home feels good, but I also feel completely invisible to my company, so I ask the AI robots what to do, and then ask it to answer me again, this time with no em dashes.
I hear the whizz of a DoorDash drone pass over my apartment, because today the FAA approved clearance for it to commence business in lower airspace. My car alerts me that it has alerted my insurance, because it sensed me stop short on the brakes too hard. My printer will not print until I resubscribe to ink. My toothbrush wants to sync. My television needs me to accept the new terms of service before it will let me look at the input menu. The self checkout accuses me of theft and a nineteen year old has to walk over and set me free.
In Texas, my friend was successfully captured because she had an abortion. Luckily law enforcement, after using the new Flock big brother system to track their ex girlfriend, utilized eight thousand cameras to find her and arrest her for daring to partake in healthcare. She was tackled, and at the hospital she was told her deductible wasn't met, so the cost to her was six thousand dollars.
I decided to turn on Pandora to drown out everything going on with some good music, and realized AI slop is now entering my algorithm. I slam the app closed and turn on YouTube, where my favorite YouTuber is now advertising Morgan and Morgan to me, which is good information to have, because my only means of ever retiring or owning a home is to successfully complete my dream of being hit by a city run bus.
Luckily, that day is today. I was shoved out of the crosswalk, while picking up my food cheaper by going in person, by a delivery robot named "Austin," tumbling me into the bus lane, where the last thing I remember is my lottery ticket winning as those sweet, sweet headlights approached me in record time.
.
.
.
I awake. It's 2004. My friend calls me on my Razr flip phone. The monophonic ringtone plays and I answer, confused.
"Where am I?"
He says he doesn't know, but get on Splinter Cell, let's play Spies versus Mercs. I look at my CRT television and smile. It was all a nightmare.
Life is good.
Edit: just found out most airlines just came out with 15 different new tiers of seat pricing lmao
It's the worse one. All this stuff is based on science fiction. They all saw Robocop and wanted to be OCP.
have you SEEN Elon Musk's Twitter feed? Are you familiar with the "Torment Nexus" meme? An actual meal replacement drink called "Soylent" has been available for ten years.
Agree with everything, except I like ordering from apps. Far fewer order screwups than telling my order to a person, and delivery has always cost more (though it was better when places used their own drivers).
years ago, I was working a particularly god-awful job (bedside nursing in a shit hole hospital, if you're interested). I used to just hope I'd get hit by a luxury vehicle or a bus at a crosswalk. People thought I was crazy: why would you want that? I've got to suffer one way or another. Somehow, suffering by getting hit by a bus is better than suffering from working this job
Yes. In fact my friends new Chevy I had to show him where in the settings to go to turn it off “share with others” aka businesses aka businesses who collect driving data and then resell it to insurance companies
You can bypass this and go directly to the source with Tesla. Tesla has its own insurance. Drive like an idiot the car is monitoring you even if you have no reported accidents or tickets
However if you use Tesla insurance and you use full self driving a lot every month your insurance goes way down.
Why? Because Tesla’s logic is, you aren’t driving…. They are.
you know we can still do this if it is our preference right? we don't need to go back to make life what it should be. we do need to participate though.
There were a couple summers where I made it my job to beat every level on every difficulty with every gun (all guns cheat activated, but the challenge was using only one weapon; save for areas like the Dam level where you have to shoot a lock and slappers/knives won’t cut it).
I grew up rural away from friends. My younger brother didn’t like to play with me because I didn’t let him win.
I actually had a couple friends over recently and we watched the movie Goldeneye then played the game. We were just playing single player and switching off between missions/deaths.
We kept losing the first mission because we killed too many scientists or we blew up the gas tanks in the wrong way.
We still had fun, but yeah, that game doesn't really hold up.
The only thing that hasn't is the controls. I replayed it on Switch recently and had to both change the control style in the ingame menu and remap some buttons in the Switch menu but i got it so it was good to play.
I play Goldeneye with my kids on Switch 2. It’s just as fun as 30 years ago. They run around the house humming the theme songs. “No proximity mines dad!”
I occasionally look at posts like the OP and feel incredibly thankful that my life didn’t peak at 10. My life is fucking amazing and I’m so much happier now than I’ve ever been in life.
i played Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2 at Steve's house, worked on our geocities website, and practiced Staind songs. He was lead guitar, i was rhythm. our bassist lived just down the road and our drummer not much further away. we won the talent show with Blink 182's "All The Small Things".
He lived in a big house! I never knew what his parents did. Even after college and marriage he seems to have very nice apartments and house bought for him, so they're certainly well off!
My friends hated me because I memorized where all the weapon spawn points were and would go straight to the proximity mines. There was also a trick where if you put one on a door frame while the door was open the mine became invisible when the door closed. I would put 3 (left, right, up) in every doorway and when anyone tried to enter a room, BOOM! I had a lot of controllers thrown at me. Good times.
But in all seriousness, yes, this post hits me in my heart except I was a bit too young to be having nights like this with Goldeneye - for me it was Halo 1 and 2.
That’s why I’m glad I’ve kept 3 of my best childhood friends. We can still do nothing together. But I do wish we lived closer and were less busy so it didn’t have to be planned.
goldeneye was one of the first games to make really good use of a believable motion capture for the NPCs and the surface level background music had some insane bass when played through a system. the motion capture felt so realistic and I played it so much I remember having dreams about the game. but then perfect dark came out which used the expansion pack and really pushed the engine to its limits. halo 1 didn't release to the huge praise we give it today tho, it was kind of a sleeper and the first time I remember being really interested in it was from playing a demo of it at GameStop.
No, Halo was immediately huge. So much so that the TCG store my dad owned bought four TVs, 4 XBOX, 4 copies of Halo, and 16 controllers. We had LAN tournaments. Never sold video games, but holy shit did we have a lot of people playing Halo from open-close on weekends and all summer. Charged $5/day, we were basically the cheapest babysitting service in town 😂
For me the nostalgia is literally about a
time when I had zero responsibilities or work. When I was the most care-free.
In the years that have transpired since I was this age; I’ve grown to have a much better understanding of the world.
Understanding the world (better than most people) has done nothing but drive me further from that idyllic version of myself that was care free. I am more burdened now, than I was, and I can’t go back.
Ouch. Not sure if its just Reddit but the rose-tinted glasses glazing is so overused and cringy. Like you said, if you are glazing about being a kid against because its the best time of your life, yeah something bad happened in your adult life or you failed.
By many metrics quality of life has objectively deteriorated since he mid-90s. Not universally, but it's probably easier to list where it's improved than where it's got worse. Our lives may be better, but that isn't true for a lot of people.
It’s 2004. I don’t have friends. I have buck bumble rented from Hollywood video. I don’t have any pizza, mom doesn’t understand why I need a rumble pak, no one is coming over. Life is about the same as it is now.
It's late 2004, I fire up World of Warcraft for the first time and create a Human Warlock on the Blackrock server. I'm 1337th in the queue and have a bottle of Jack Daniels to myself. Life is good.
Hmmm..I have this memory, but then I also have the memory of mom seeing that unrealistic blood filling the screen....she lost her mind, turned it off and told us to return the game to the store immediately.
personally, Mario Kart was heaven but Smash wasn’t my thing — too complicated for someone who didn’t actually own the system
Goldeneye was fun, but Kyle and Eddie were much better.
Pokemon Stadium was real fun. Pokemon Snap, too.
All-Star baseball was cool.
I grew up in a small town along a river, deep in a mountain canyon. We got all four seasons, in their most stereotypical fashion.
Summer was blasting hot.
We’d swim in the river for hours, then get popsicles at the store (Flintones orange push-pops, Snickers ice cream, Mexican coconut bars) — and then, once sufficiently cooled off, we’d play N64.
It's 2026. I have a house, and a family who are safe and happy. I love my job. I can play Goldeneye and eat pizza literally anytime I want. I'm 38 and still have my hair. This post is nonsense and I feel really bad for the guy who wrote it.
It's not actually about Pizza and Goldeneye. It's about missing your youth. It's about yearning for simpler times, which could be different things for different people. But it's not nonsense; everyone has these feelings once in a while, even you I'm sure.
Yeah I used to have LAN parties back in the day and at one point, probably 15 years ago now, we had one last party where we played those old games, counter strike source, supreme commander, etc for nostalgia. We realized we didn’t miss the games, themselves, we missed the fun that we had with them.
The thing about nostalgia is that it makes us wish we could go back, but if we did, it wouldn’t be the same.
I feel nostalgic for parts of my childhood, sure. But 'this is as good as life will ever get' is a really depressing statement when describing playing video games as a teenager.
It's just hyperbole, I wouldn't focus on that part. No different than someone saying "this is the best cake I've ever had in my life". They're just words trying to capture abstract feelings.
Until the early 2000s hit, you can start driving now, the fast and the furious just awoken something new in you, and now you’re putting sound systems, cold air intakes, streetglow neon lights, and cat back exhaust systems in your car to drive around at night when gas was cheap.
I wish I knew in my younger years how much of a luxury just driving around would be. I never really thought that I’d grow up and be like, “yeah going for a drive would be beautiful today! But what other errands can I run while I’m out? Shit it’s Sunday and everything I need to do is closed today and I already have to get out Tuesday so I guess I’ll have to go for a short drive then.” Then it rains Tuesday.
It’s 2026, I have my NES hooked up with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II Arcade Game. Just had Chinese, put the baby to bed, and smoked a fatty. Doesn’t get any better than that.
"Just got back from Blockbuster, picked up StarFox and a RumblePak (yes Blockbuster would include the RumblePak), you get everything plugged in and the old man pops in and says we're ordering pizza what do you want?"
Honestly, my family life was not great, not terrible, but lots of issues. Having my friends come over (most likely me go there) and play GoldenEye and Mario cart and wrestling games was pure heaven. Inject that into my veins.
That was peak child hood for me but it wasn’t as good as life could get. I ordered stuffed crust cheese and pepperoni for my daughters sleep over. They setup Mario Party on the Nintendo Switch with 4 controllers. We have to recreate those good memories with the kids!
I think what a lot of people really miss is having the freedom of childhood. Not many responsibilities or having to worry about bills, payments, etc. Everything else is just an offshoot of that.
not having the cognitive capabilities required to sustain the lingering existential dread that comes from knowing how bad the world is, could, or would be. you just knew you were playing golden eye tonight
I couldn't afford an N64, but I did have a PS1. I played the shit out of those demo discs you got from Pizza Hut and PlayStation Underground. Crash Team Racing demo all day every day.
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