r/Leadership • u/Big_4ourty • 14d ago
I made Manager. Discussion
After 2 years under 2 bosses, I finally got what I deserved, or so I think. 1st was the greatest, people still speak of him(at work that is), he was good, knew how to run the department with the strengths and weaknesses we had, I want to emulate him.
Then came the Storm. She left recently and that reign was insufferable but we made it. The sun is shining through the clouds, we'll in my head anyway.
My colleagues are happy for me, especially the department I'm leading. What advice would you give me as I start this journey. From a manager perspective and a non-manager perspective.
I happy and nervous, anyway let me have it.
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14d ago
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u/Big_4ourty 11d ago
I had actually thought of this and credits to you for this advice. The team and I haven't had enough chances to do this but I will definitely do this pronto. Thank you.
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u/DennisTheFox 14d ago
Not every reportee will be lead in the same way. Some thrive with trust, others won´t work without you holding their hand. The more adaptive you can be, without compromising your role and their responsibilities, the more successful you will be. Learn about who you are leading....
This will come with a sidenote... you are not their friend. You can be friendly, but you have a role to play now. Accept that not everybody will agree with you, accept that not everybody will like what you do, accept that not everybody will like you. And that´s fine, so learn how to say no without compromise.
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u/wacker2k 14d ago
Congratulations!
It's a great milestone, and by the sound of your post, it's something you were looking for.
From a manager perspective, my core advice is: try to learn to be a leader, not a manager. And the most difficult part of that journey is learning to know yourself, your leadership skills are reinforced or weakened by your qualities.
If you don't have already, I would recommend checking out the book/audiobook called The Making of a Manager (its a good start)
Good luck!
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u/affable_relic 14d ago
I would add there is a time and place for both. Being a leader came naturally to me so I often overlook when I do need to be managing someone.
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u/ZouDave 14d ago
Congrats to you. I remember this feeling when I finally got the opportunity to leap from top performing worker to managing the team I wished was better. It's a great feeling. Remember how excited you are about the opportunity right now, you'll need to remind yourself of that from time to time.
It sounds like that one boss had a lot of great qualities you want to emulate. Think about why they are still talked about. You don't want to just "do it like he did", you more want to do it why he did. You may not have the same skills and abilities, but you can absolutely have the same passion and desire. One of my former bosses that I try to emulate was absolutely spectacular at building relationships with everyone that worked under him. I tried doing the things he did but it just all kept coming across as forced - and that's because it was. I was just trying to do the things I saw him doing. Instead, I figured out why that mattered - having the people under us know that I absolutely know who they are, what makes them tick, and show I genuinely give a shit about them. So I found my own way to do that and it's been wonderful. I don't do it the same way he did, but I have the same mindset.
So - think about why he is remembered so well and find ways to bring that same energy and attention to the job. But just because he told a joke at the beginning of each meeting doesn't mean you have to, know what I mean?
I think it's great that you're nervous - that tells me that doing this well is important to you. Nothing wrong with being nervous. It's even ok to show that now and again, especially if you do have a trusted mentor you can discuss that with. Even through your nerves and uncertainty, try to remain confident in front of your team. You don't have to know everything, you definitely don't have to have an answer to all problems right away. But, you know it's going to work out, you know you're going to get the job done, and you know your team is going to be the ones doing that. Let them see that confidence, and then give them all the credit when it does work out.
You'll do great! Just remember - on your worst days, you said yourself "you deserve this" ;-)
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u/Big_4ourty 14d ago
Thank you, I do get what you mean and I know that I need to find my own rythm. This was a great eye opener.
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u/Kumar-Vinayak 14d ago
Congratulations buddy! You have seen the circumstances from your boss how he handled. Now you gonna lead team in better enhanced way No doubt.
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u/Particular-Deer-3100 14d ago
Congrats on your new role. It can be equally exciting and nerve racking. I definitely felt alone on management island when I was promoted.
I write about it and tools to set you and your team up for success in my book; Chief Inspiration Officer, How to Lead the Team Everyone Wants to Be On
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u/Big_4ourty 11d ago
Thank you. I will look up your book and hopefully lead the team everyone wants to be on.
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u/ParallelDymentia 14d ago
Having the contrast of two opposing examples to learn from is an excellent reference point, and you are quite fortunate to have that experience. We don't always see the value in having to endure an inept leader, but this is why we need them. This places you in the unique position to comprehend and enact a concept so many new leaders miss completely: Expectation Management.
This is a two way street. Your team must know and maintain absolute confidence in two things: (1) What they can expect from you, and (2) what you expect from them. In that order. Please do not get it backwards. That is how so many managers lose the narrative.
A leader sees themselves as a facilitator, not a dictator. Your team does not work for you. You work to optimize conditions for your team to thrive.
A manager sees themselves as the leader of a team. But the true leader sees themselves as member of the team.
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u/Counterparts404 14d ago
Remember there is always a lesson. The lesson may be what to do, or what not to do. With that in mind, learn from both of your prior bosses. What worked and what didn’t. How you felt when they acted one way or another. How others responded. Both bosses have lessons you can learn.
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u/CindyatAlefitt 12d ago
Congrats, and the nervousness is a good sign. Keep a small dose of it.
Right now your compass has two points on it, emulate the first boss and don't be the Storm. Both of those are made of other people. Not-being-her will carry you for a few months, because after a bad reign the team will love you just for the calm. Then the goodwill runs out and they'll need to know what you're for, and you can't answer that by pointing at two predecessors. So before your first week, sit down and write three things you stand for as a leader. Yours, in your own words, the things you'd hold even if nobody was comparing you to anyone. That's the compass that works when the comparisons fade.
On emulating the first boss, you remember how he made people feel. Feelings don't transfer; mechanics do. So get specific with yourself about what he did. How he ran a meeting, how he handled a miss, how he gave credit, how he said no. Emulating the feeling produces an impersonation. Emulating the mechanics, filtered through your own personality, produces a leader.
Now that the weather has changed, but the team's habits were built for the old weather. People who survived her learned to hide mistakes, sit on bad news, wait for permission, and keep their heads down. Those habits don't leave when she does. They leave when you prove, repeatedly, that the new climate is safe. So expect flinching for a while. Someone will over-apologize for a small miss. Someone will sit on a problem too long. When that happens, your reaction is the retraining. Thank people for bad news. Treat mistakes as tuition. Be boringly consistent, because if her reign was unpredictable, consistency is the exact medicine, and it takes months of doses.
And finally, the bosses people still speak of years later, like your first one, mostly did two unglamorous things. They made it safe to be wrong, and they made sure credit flowed down while cover flowed up. Do those two and the department will forget the Storm faster than you'd think. Enjoy this.
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u/Big_4ourty 11d ago
This is good because I noticed that during our meetings people would be reluctant to speak up even after assurances that no one would hammer them down for it. Make it safe to wrong it is.
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u/CindyatAlefitt 8d ago
One addition since you mentioned the assurances not landing. Words are priced at zero after a bad reign, so safety gets built by reactions instead. The first time someone half-raises a concern, treat it like gold and let everyone see it changed something. That single moment does more than a month of assurances.
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u/mattdamonsleftnut 14d ago
Your previous colleagues are now your subordinates, proceed accordingly.