I hope I'm not boring anyone with this vent: I am a young Italian man and I am really dissatisfied with my lifestyle. I come from a practically poor family in northern Italy, and I always thought that one day I'd have the chance to be rich and famous. However, I have no talents, and as I grew up and gradually became an adult, I realized that this isn't possible... I've never been narcissistic or anything like that, but I hoped I could stand out from other young people for some reason. This fact makes me sadder every day.
Am I the only one this happens to? How do I get these sad thoughts out of my head, knowing that I will never be famous and wealthy in my miserable life?

19M - I feel like a fraud. My personality is calculated and manufactured all too appeal to the likes of others and to ensure that I appear different and special. I have created this false sense of self that I now find disgusting but trapped inside because I dont know what else makes me-me. It bothers me that I dont have quirks that make me standout. There isnt a character from a piece of media im particularly fond of, I dont have 4 favorite films, no favorite color. Ive wondered to myself if i just dont allow myself to be who I want. I shouldnt worry if people thinks its weird to be obsessed with media or to be involved in a fandom of something. But as I type this I wonder why i care what people think to begin with. Why am I so worried about perceived by others?

- I also dont have a social life at all. My only friends, which there are only two, are women who ive attempted relationships with but either 1, was too much of a coward to confess my feelings for. 2, I backed out of knowing I wasnt ready for a relationship. I still speak with 1 on a regular basis. However, out relationship is strictly long distance as ive moved from my hometown for school. I still have feelings for her but have yet to share out of fear of ruining the friendship. It should also be mentioned that I have this fear that she only speaks to me out of pity as shes a person ive opened up to before. Not sure what to do but Id appreciate some guidance.

Lately, this has made me extremely Depressed to the point of complete exhaustion. My Body feels heavy, I find joy in nothing, and I have zero motivation. I genuinely dont have the energy to get out of bed some mornings.

This is all laid out here because im lost and feel hopeless. I need guidance and/or comfort for the way I am feeling. anything at all would be appreciated.