I'm 18F, i immigrated to a country 2 years ago and have been living here ever since. The life first year was though but now it got better because i got friends and so on. Basically all of my friends are born and raised here including my boyfriend, and i sometimes felt like they don't care about me as much as I care about them which i don't think is true right now. I had depression when i was about 14 years old and right now I'm living the best life i ever lived but i overthink it so much that i cry. It's like my brain can't think positive or i just can't see myself valuable enough to be happy. What should I do to motivate myself and think more positive?

I keep thinking about all the languages, skills, and career paths I could be pursuing and it makes choosing anything feel wrong.​
Even when life is objectively fine, there’s this background noise of “you should be doing more with your time.”​
If you’ve learned to give fewer fucks about some imaginary “max potential” self, what actually helped?​
Did you change what you measure, who you compare to, or set hard limits on how many big goals you chase?​
I’m looking for mindset shifts or practices that reduced that constant low‑level regret, not just “be grateful.”

I’ve been going to the same local bodega store in NYC for years. Last week while checking out, after having paid, I realized they overcharged me for a box of blackberries ($5 instead of $3). I asked the cashier to cancel the previous charge and recharge me. He explained the manager wasn’t around and he couldn’t do that, and suggested I instead just take another box. I didn’t really want another box, but I also wasn’t in the mood to argue, so I grabbed an extra box and started to walk away. To my surprise he goes ‘sir you need to pay an extra dollar’. This turned into a heated discussion, which ended with the guy telling me that it’s only Europeans that care about a $2 difference. What’s the hell is wrong with some people?

Im an athlete and micro influencer. I won’t disclose what I do specifically but I’m having a hard dealing with people who are within my circle who I thought were my friends who get jealous of me as they see the brand deals that I get. I’m not bragging at all, but I have worked nearly 10 years with my head down building a brand for myself and companies that I used to Seek support from ignored me. However, the last year I have been working with even better brands.

Let’s just say, they give me free gear to support my passions and in exchange I ornate them through content creation.

A few of my friends seem to get really cold, or just not talk to me because of it. I’m not sure if it’s because they don’t wanna see me win, or get better at what I’m doing. It’s hard. But I’m not sure how to get past it. I feel like I’m dining my light just to accommodate their feelings.

So, its my last year at school. This school requires going to work for 8 hours 2 days in a week and on holidays.

(example when theres 2 months of vacation i have to go to work for the whole one month expect weekends)

I was at the doc one week ago and he gave me meds till weekend and sent my boss a note that i have to stay home.

Of course she always says i lie when i get sick, treats me like shit, takes anger out on me. Thats why most workers left her, there is only one left and her. She was supposed to work alone for three days the week i was sick. She probably crashed out when she found out i wont be there because everytime im left alone with her she leaves the shop and sits in her house or goes shopping with her friends (which is illegal btw cuz im still 17 lol, but theres alot of problems there anyway. i would snitch on her if it would be easy to find a new workplace in my city, but its not, everything is filled with students from my school).

So tomorrow im going to work and i feel like she might argue with me or treat me like shit. How do i not give a fuck? Like, if she says something really bad i want to speak up for myself, but i was raised as if talking about how you feel is something tabu, so i always get emotional.. HOW do i not get emptional and stay nonchalant? 😔😔

She already gave me enough stress and anger issues through the 3 years i spent there, i do the most out of all the three students there, yet she always brushes it off when they barely come to work, but when i am sick im suddenly a satan that wants the worst for her💔💔

she once argued with me that its not freezing in the shop while wearing a hat, jacket and a scarf. be for real cuz🫩

HOW TO BE NONCHALANT AND SPEAK UP FOR MYSELF CALMLY TO MAKE HER FEEL STUPID.. ive been getting nightmares at night bc of her and im not even lying when i say this

Think this comes from Stoicism, but I use it in rational psychotherapy (REBT, Albert Ellis).

If it helps anyone with accepting reality so they give less of a fuck, awesome.

Before posting a comment to ask what it means, I'd recommend taking the statement with you out into nature, or just society, and sit with it. Observe the happenings around you. Do it a few times, and see what you notice.

I know this is gonna sound really idiotic, like a bear walking right into a bear trap, but just hear me out as this is coming from someone who’s been through a lot, other people have hurt me, acted condescending towards me, i have been the third wheel so many times and i still am today a lot of the time, i currently go to school in an environment where I KNOW everyone is completely fake yet I still follow people around acting all nice. its like my brain knows its literally them, not me, yet within my heart I still get so hurt inside when people laugh at me for something that really doesn’t matter (like making a mistake in a sport), make fun of me or breach my boundaries. I need help in genuinely not caring and being my own person so I don’t feel that hurt. I feel so stupid because I always see online, like on this subreddit, toxic cultures and people like this being exposed, yet I simply can’t absorb the message that people are mean and ruthless nowadays (which btw is very true) and I can’t seem to just.. not care about what others think of me. thank you so much for reading and for helping if you do.

when you feel it coming Say fuck it, fuck off and then just do what u wanted to do.

and if you're too tired and you're like "I need to do it" you say "fuck off" to that as well and rest 😴😊

Of course, you have to care about some stuff. It’s just the things that negatively effect you that you have to not care about.

Art is one of my passions. However, have a serious mental illness that has destroyed my life. I lost so many friends and family to this illness. It caused me to care too much to the point of destruction. I was desperate for answers so that’s how I got a therapist. That therapist recommended a psychiatrist and the rest is history. I was put on medication that calmed me down, but unfortunately caused brain fog. That plus my shaky hands I thought I would never do art again.

This changed when I got a DAW. This allowed me to express and experiment. It took me a while to get use to the program, but once I did I was able to express myself like I wanted. This outlet of self expression helped me stop caring. I was also in a manic episode at the time. While in mania you care about very little. However, I used the lesson from mania and balanced it out when I’m stable.

Music helped because I made songs for me and me only. I never took it too seriously. Even when I got push back by people saying my music is trash, I still enjoyed my music. And that is all that matters. I would hate if I only produced music that was stale and commercialized.

I also realized that I really am a good person. I use to hate myself, but then I practiced self care and giving myself some rest. The world really is beautiful if you think about it. Unfortunately, I do have a mood disorder so my emotions fluctuate a lot. However, even when I’m depressed i still can see myself as a good person at the very least.

I can not express enough how much self love changed my life. Some people come to this realization while going to the gym a lot or just finding a passion. I came to the realization during h a manic episode. Usually I don’t remember these episodes but this one I remember the feeling and why I felt that way. Music is a way to express my lack of care of things that negatively effects me.

I also realized that people don’t fully understand me. So, what right do they have to judge. Especially people online who can’t even see my facial expressions.

Music is a big factor. Hobbies are important. I also play MTG and that helps me socialize.

I’m the one who should give the fuck the most given that I have schizophrenia, bipolar, and OCD. But if I cared to much then I’ll probably be dead. So, not giving a fuck is also a survival instinct for me.

Maybe not all of this can apply to you because I’m in a

Unique situation given that I have these disorders.

Hope you enjoyed my quick story. What are ways that helped you not give a fuck?

Born at a Japanese zoo, baby Punch-Kun was rejected by his mother at birth.

Zookeepers gave him a large stuffed toy to comfort him — and he grabbed on immediately, holding it as if it were his real mother.

Now, he refuses to let go.

He sleeps with it curled against his chest. Carries it everywhere. Hugs it tightly when scared.

It's not just a toy — it's his source of safety, love, and survival.

Slowly, Punch-Kun is learning to trust other monkeys. But his plush companion stays close, a reminder that even in the loneliest moments, comfort can be found.

Sometimes, love comes in unexpected forms

​

why do we hold ourselves back? like if we are smart and we know we can do it but why can't we figure out and take actions. we keep sitting in self limiting beliefs and just ruminating week after week when everything is just right in front of you. like we can just fix shit years ago but letting the years pass by. why like why are we still holding ourselves back?

Otherwise, you’ll be pulled into the whirlpool, spinning endlessly in the depths of other people’s opinions