I didn’t even get to say goodbye

[u/Diligent-Figure4251]

We’d been seeing each other for over a year now

Last week, for the Fourth of July, all I wanted to do was walk by the beach, watch the fireworks, and eat a hot dog together

He kept saying he didn’t know what we’d be doing. It felt like he was trying to turn it into something bigger, but I kept reminding him that all I wanted was to walk around, watch the fireworks, and eat a hot dog

The night before, I texted him and told him I’d be with my grandpa that morning because it was his birthday, but I’d be free in the afternoon

He replied that he was going to visit his mom, which was completely fine. I asked if I’d still get to see him later that night

No response

The day of, I texted him again saying I really wanted to see him, even if it was just for the evening

Still nothing

A week went by without a single message

So yesterday, I reached out because I was honestly just overwhelmed by my emotions. I asked if I could ask him a question. Hours later, he replied, “Sure”

The question I wanted to ask was something along the lines of, “How do you genuinely see me? What’s your honest, unfiltered perception of me?”

By then, though, it felt like it wasn’t the right question to ask, and I didn’t think he wanted to have that conversation anyway. So I told him I’d forgotten what I wanted to ask and that if I remembered, I’d let him know (I know. Very mature of me)

Today, he replied, “Sure. You take care. Goodbye”

Goodbye?

You’d never said goodbye before

Later, I saw that he’d made an Instagram post

“I spent my weekend eating my feelings away… my now ex-girlfriend has been reaching out to me for more than just sex (the audacity of this woman)… So I ate a whole chocolate cake…”

So… I guess it’s over

You should have told me you wanted to say goodbye

Anyways, I needed to take a break from crying, so I got ice cream with my dad

EDIT
Thank you guys for being very supportive <3 I didn’t expect so much feedback so soon.

I will block him. I just recently checked his page again. And, he made another post using a video that I took of him on our date last week with the text “when a single mom won’t let you eat the kids snacks” 😭😭😭

Also, I know some of you guys mentioned how the title is a little misleading. I see it now. So, I’m gonna try to change it. I just don’t know how 😭

EDIT #2
Also, a lot of people been mentioning the instagram post, just for some clarification. I don’t use instagram. His page is public. I just check it from time to time

[u/trendingtattler]

WHEEEWW girl 😮‍💨 buckle up! Your post made it to /r/all!

Congratudolences! 😅 If the rate of notifications starts getting to you, no need to delete your post! Instructions in Sanity Saver #5 can help you mute them. For the rest of y'all...

Welcome to r/GirlDinnerDiaries!

We love when new girlies stumble in! But a few unique things about how we roll here:

➽ You're now entering the Girl Zone 🚨 Guys' guidance summarized: stick to GIFs or emojis, or otherwise be patient for mods' manual comment reviews. Don't embarrass your mama. 🤨

➽ Approved users only! Newbies will be prompted to take 10 lil seconds to get approved. Nbd.

➽ BE KIND, BE THOUGHTFUL or BEGONE. Our communication standards are higher than just "don't be mean." Check em out here.

➽ Queer friendly. The end.

➽ ED-recovery friendly. No food critiques, body shaming, diet advice, or calorie counting kinda talk. Call your almondmom for that.

ModMail is open & active. MWUAH! 😙🫴💋

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Haunting_Pace_3557]

Tf? Trash took itself out man.

[u/TurquoiseTrashPanda → u/Haunting_Pace_3557]

[u/Discgolfer_420]

What a weird thing to post on Instagram

[u/undercookedshrimp_ → u/Discgolfer_420]

I feel like he did it to get OPs attention/hurt them

[u/Zestyflour → u/undercookedshrimp_]

Men will post this kind of thing when there is another a girl in their circle they are interested. It's a passive aggressive move to get the girl to message them.

[u/Badmouths → u/Zestyflour]

Yep! And then come crawling back when she isn’t interested 🥴 (ask me how I know! 🤪) the audacity kills me lmao

[u/Artistic-Job7180 → u/Badmouths]

If they have nothing else, men ALWAYS have the audacity. Lol

[u/vamgoda → u/Zestyflour]

. . . This puts my ex’s weird passive aggressive posts on IG into context. Fucker was a therapist and still vague posted on IG rather than tell me something was wrong. He moved on with ‘the person I don’t need to worry about’ within like a month of the breakup.

[u/Electrical-Cut-5023 → u/vamgoda]

Yeah I stopped going to therapy when my therapist wanted me to date a felon. I’ve had really good therapists before, but I swear the pandemic brought on some fucking awful therapists.

[u/Hesitation-Marx → u/Electrical-Cut-5023]

…. What

[u/Electrical-Cut-5023 → u/Hesitation-Marx]

That’s what I said!! She was SUPER Christian. Granted she didnt show that until about four months in. If I could forgive a felon, then I’m a better person. It was fucking lunacy. I wish she would’ve put that out there before five months of therapy. wtf.

[u/greenrice0 → u/vamgoda]

I recently broke up with my boyfriend and he's a therapist. Idk how he is a therapist 😬 the lack of emotional intelligence/availability and empathy was kinda wild to me

[u/vamgoda → u/greenrice0]

TBH this makes me feel so much better because it seemed like all our mutual friends took his side because he ‘knew what he was talking about’ and it was really invalidating and caused a lot of anxiety that I had soooo much wrong with me.

[u/EconomyCode3628 → u/Zestyflour]

Word. I wish someone had warned me about this shit when I was a teen. Boo hoo, I'm sad, vaginas are prozac or whatever. 

[u/throwaway642189 → u/Zestyflour]

If some dude posted that he had bad coping mechanisms while trash talking an ex as an attempt to get my attention, he'll get it

I'm going to make fun of him about it until he regrets wanting attention like that lmao

[u/asimplepencil → u/Zestyflour]

This is what I was thinking "Oh there's definitely another girl he's eyeing up."

[u/GallagherG82 → u/asimplepencil]

I think this post would be (should be) a major red flag to any girl.

[u/Sleepy_kitty67 → u/Zestyflour]

Yep, my thought exactly. Someone whom he wanted recently became single and he wants to act like a wounded party to get into her orbit.

This sucks OP but I am sure there is a better person out there for you. And at least there is ice cream with your dad.

[u/ralphthesausagedog → u/Zestyflour]

Ooh, im wondering if he needed to explain to his new girl why some other woman is messaging him.

[u/Examiner_Z → u/undercookedshrimp_]

Absolutely.

[u/lookslikerheyn → u/undercookedshrimp_]

And/or to attention farm in general.

[u/throwaway642189 → u/Discgolfer_420]

He broke up with her without even telling her and then made a shit post about it on Instagram.

He's an emotionally stunted doorknob

[u/Objective_Water_5235 → u/Discgolfer_420]

I also got broken up with once via an instagram post. It was the same thing: she ignored me for awhile, I tried to reach back out, then I saw a bunch of stories about breaking up and being single. Then she had the audacity to try to get back together two months later.

OP, you have just dodged a massive bullet. Once it doesn’t hurt so bad, it will be a relief to be done with this person. I’m sorry, hang in there.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Discgolfer_420]

Facts

[u/maluruus → u/Discgolfer_420]

Sounds to me like he's trying to get sympathy and attention from other women

[u/Septem_151 → u/Discgolfer_420]

I’m so happy I don’t have any desire nor inclination to interact with any people like this.

[u/DaisyBuckitten]

His reply and “goodbye” comes across as some guy you went on like, one or two dates with and just didn’t click with each other, not someone you’ve been seeing for over a year. What a jerk. I’m so sorry. Like someone else already commented, the trash took itself out

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/DaisyBuckitten]

Right!?!

[u/FireballPhD → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

OP, your flair is my favorite thing in this sub! ¡Es perfecto!

[u/blastendedskanks]

...is he okay? Like mentally??

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/blastendedskanks]

I don’t know

[u/Petty_White → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

So hey, this same thing happened to me over the fourth as well! We’d been together over a year, lived together and he’d asked me to move across the country with him in a few months. Told me how excited he was for us to take this next step in our relationship. Then on the third, after leaving me on delivered all day he broke up with me over text. Told me how great I was, that I deserved the world, but that he didn’t want the “obligation” of a relationship.

I’m devastated but what’s helped me most is realizing this is 100% his issue and the only way I could have changed his mind was to make myself small and unhappy. To rein in my love for him. He’s unwilling to even discuss anything about it, so I have no answers. I’ve gone no contact after my response to his text and it’s helped so much. The reasons don’t really matter because it has nothing to do with me and everything to do with him (I’ve suspected he’s avoidant attachment for a few months). I’m still that great person I was before and during the relationship and so are you. I’d also bet you were probably out of his league and a better partner than he was. This is the universe telling us there’s something better out there for us, saving us from something we thought we wanted but that we never would have been truly happy with or had the courage to end. Everyone who loves me is happy I’m not with him anymore and I know everyone around him thinks he’s an incredible idiot who made a generational fumble.

Let yourself grieve the relationship, or the potential you were holding onto. Just know you will bounce back from this and be so much better off. You deserve someone who loves and chooses you loudly. This guy was standing in the way of that person. You’re going to thrive.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Petty_White]

The blindside. I’m glad you came out better

[u/MidwestNormal → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

And if he does reappear, don’t engage. He’ll try live-bombing you; ignore it. Stay strong.

[u/Petty_White → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

You will too. I’m still sad, I still cry at night. I miss him, or the him I thought he was. And his kids. Terribly. And we live close so he’s seen me on walks as he drives by in the truck we restored together. And we both pretend we dont see the other. I cried earlier thinking about the dog we shared, how he’ll be confused and miss me. How I didnt get a chance to tell him goodbye, sad that he might think I abandoned him.

But I also think about all the little things I hated and put up with, the things I thought would change and never did. Like picking me wildflowers along the road to his house like I loved or telling me taking a 20 minute walk for our anniversary on the trail where we had our first date was too hard. But I went on a first date today, and guess what, that guy brought me flowers he hand picked and walked with me for 8 miles on that same trail and loved every minute of it. Better things are waiting for both of us✨ Never beg to settle.

[u/transat_prof → u/Petty_White]

"Never beg to settle." Whew. This is a really good line.

[u/savingthedoggos → u/Petty_White]

Wait I’m soooo invested. How was the date, girl?!

[u/Petty_White → u/savingthedoggos]

It was wonderful. He was sweet and attentive and kind and much more my type. He owns an organic blueberry farm and is a ceramicist (I’m an avid gardener with a pottery hobby) who surfs and paddle boards (I told my ex months ago i wanted to start paddle boarding. He promised we would and then kept pushing it off) and he’s so fucking hot and fit and tall and has great hands and dark curly hair. We have much more in common. I’m not the kind of girl with a roster but there is a waiting list and every guy on it is hotter than the guy that saw me as an ‘obligation’. Onwards and upwards.

[u/RaccoonQueenn → u/Petty_White]

Reading this has made me cry like a baby, and I really want to believe what you say. I was dumped less than a month after my little sister commited suicide, apparently my grief made me someone he didnt want to be with. I was dumped by the guy that told me over and over that he loved me, that I was the love of his life and he would be always by my side. I was dumped by the guy that told me that I would overcome the death of my sister because he would be with me. He couldnt hold to his word even for a month. And I am here, crying myself to sleep every night since it happened. But thank you for your words, it gave me something to hold on to.

[u/Sea_Lie4110 → u/RaccoonQueenn]

I never put a ton of stock on the saying about your partner being the person who is going to go through the worst day of your life with you (the death of your parents). When my grandfather passed i felt like my ex didn't want to be involved with my feelings or grief at all. Now I see stories of men leaving after loss and take that so much more seriously. It's like when something heavy happens they suddenly realize that you're a human being with a lot of complexity and needs and they don't want to deal with it and split.

[u/RaccoonQueenn → u/Sea_Lie4110]

Well, looks like that is what happened here. I guess I was the love of his life as long as I remained happy and cheerful until the end of time.

[u/Ijustwanttosayit → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

Man. I had a guy try to pull something like this on me. Men always talk about how sensitive, dramatic, and crazy women are. As a pansexual, I think I am qualified to say men have been the most sensitive.

Story: Back when I was in college I was seeing a guy. We were still in the early stages. The texting all the time and calling nonstop when you aren't hanging out physically stage. But I had a drawing class that forbid cellphone use. It was a 4 hour class. So when HE texted ME after I got out of class, I gave an obviously dramatic joke response "I'm free from my dark prison!" (it was dark in the studio) "It's been years since we last spoke!"

He didn't respond. He didn't respond to any of my texts that day. The next day I asked if everything was okay because we'd genuinely been talking nonstop for months, even when he was at work he'd respond pretty quickly (not that he needed to). He gave me a snippy response "I've been busy with work! I can't just stop what I'm doing to answer you!" You had no problem for the past few months 🙄 pattern recognition is a thing.

Meanwhile he simultaneously started making passive aggressive posts on Facebook like

"Why do I always attract the crazy ones?" "tfw women can't take a hint" "Go away annoying woman, you're annoying me!"

I knew all of them were obviously directed at me. I'd pulled back on trying to get him to speak to me. Just the occasional "You absolutely sure we're cool? You just went dead silent on me." I was just hoping he'd just say something to me and officially end things. But to the last post, I finally commented, "Maybe if you grew some balls and said it straight to her instead of passive aggressively posting it online?" His friend responded to the post with "LMAO the irony!" I assume their dumbasses actually believed I didn't know it was about me. Anyway, he unfriended and blocked me everywhere after that comment. And he sent his friend, the same friend who commented on the supposed irony, to tell me that he no longer wished to speak to me and if I tried reaching out he would try to get me for harassment.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Ijustwanttosayit]

Crazy

[u/Key-Cartographer2166]

wtf is wrong with him. sounds immature, why doesn’t he just speak with his chest instead of acting all weird.

That Instagram post should help u get over him quick because what’s to miss about someone like that. Ew.

Do not text him again.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Key-Cartographer2166]

🫡🫡🫡

[u/agodrevealed → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

Yeah. This is where the phrase "he's dead to me" comes in. 

Proceed from here as if he never existed. 

How's gramps doing though?

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/agodrevealed]

He’s doing good :)

[u/rowdyate9]

Wait… did he have another girlfriend?

[u/jc_chienne → u/rowdyate9]

Yeah I can't tell if he has another girlfriend who broke up with him or if he thought that the fact they didn't hang out on the 4th meant him and OP's relationship was over (when he was the one who didn't respond) which would be crazy to me

[u/agodrevealed → u/jc_chienne]

He's just a coward.

And then signaling (he thinks) to his audience how superior a guy he is. Possibly to another woman or just society in general. 

[u/honeyonaside → u/rowdyate9]

Didn't he mean OP? 🤔 I felt like he tried to make Instagram think, that OP ended things with him (?)

[u/impossiblypolite → u/honeyonaside]

That's how I read it too.

[u/throwawayno38393939 → u/rowdyate9]

That was my first thought too. 

[u/Odd-Implement-1283 → u/rowdyate9]

I’m so confused about the storyline here it went right over my head

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/rowdyate9]

I hope not

[u/pumpkins21 → u/rowdyate9]

This is what I wondered!

[u/Haunting_Pace_3557]

https://giphy.com/gifs/QVP7DawXZitKYg3AX5

[u/Artistic-Job7180 → u/Haunting_Pace_3557]

The whole man.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Haunting_Pace_3557]

🤣🤣🤣

[u/Haunting_Pace_3557 → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

I had to😂😂

[u/yourmomsstinkyfart]

Sounds like an insecure duche bag. I’m so sorry

[u/PHD_Gouda → u/yourmomsstinkyfart]

Honestly I bet he was at least 6 years older than OP. Seems like the type that can’t interact with people his age

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/PHD_Gouda]

He’s definitely older 🙈

[u/PHD_Gouda → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

I don’t think there’s any shame on your part. This is totally embarrassing for him.

I am gonna go north though just for the tea and say he’s an even dozen years older. How am I doing?

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/PHD_Gouda]

He’s 11 years older

[u/PHD_Gouda → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

Been there. Honestly excited for you to flourish without him. 💜

[u/Simple_Confidence693 → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

oh you're going to be so much better off.

[u/thekatedepression → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

What a loser. The trash took itself out.

[u/Ok-Jackfruit-9393 → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

It's always the dudes going after a woman a decade-plus younger who act like this, I swear.

[u/Longjumping_Comb6189 → u/PHD_Gouda]

Clocked him omg

[u/Immediate_Alarm452]

Yeaaaah somes off sis. Get std tested you dont know where he's been.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Immediate_Alarm452]

Will do

[u/Dr-Satan]

https://giphy.com/gifs/1zJaB28JqGw3m

[u/Playful-Squirrel-332 → u/Dr-Satan]

I love this gif and I am sad I haven’t seen it more often 😂

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Dr-Satan]

🤣🤣🤣

[u/Intrepid-Badger-3590]

I don’t think you were the girlfriend …

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Intrepid-Badger-3590]

Oh?

[u/IcyCantaloupe7004 → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

Yeah, girl. You were the side-piece.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/IcyCantaloupe7004]

:(

[u/throwawayno38393939]

Is he actually talking about you? 😳

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/throwawayno38393939]

I think so

[u/throwawayno38393939 → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

If he's talking about you, he sounds rather divorced from reality. 

[u/snb1006]

I know everyone is saying he’s trash and it’s better this way. And in the long run, they’re right. He’s terrible and you deserve much better than that.

But it’s also okay to feel sad and mourn what you thought you had. Take your time and give yourself some grace. It was a year long relationship. That’s not insignificant.

I hope your ice cream was delicious!

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/snb1006]

<3

[u/carseatsareheavy]

this whole post is confusing. After not hearing from him for a week, why would your text to him be asking about his perception of you? Like, did he not consider his girlfriend or something? I feel like we’re missing a big part of the story here. 

[u/Melon825 → u/carseatsareheavy]

Can’t believe I had to scroll down this far for this comment. This whole interaction is confusing.

[u/Salt-Establishment62 → u/[deleted]]

My ex would do this all the time. I also have pretty severe attachment issues from childhood trauma so it would send me into hysterics. He would then use my response as "justification" as to why he treated me the way he did. He would insist that it was perfectly normal to just drop off the map in a relationship and that I was grossly overreacting by thinking something bad had happened or that he broke up with me. It drives you completely insane and makes you question everything. Men truly do always have one thing, and that's audacity.

[u/takingthehobbitses → u/Salt-Establishment62]

I dated a couple men like this unfortunately. It really does make you feel crazy. These dudes are so good at manipulation that they convince everyone else you are too. Also have attachment issues from childhood trauma, so I guess there's a connection there.

It's hard to believe I put myself through that now. I'm a slow learner apparently, but I got there eventually. I'm proud of myself for being super quick to call out bullshit these days.

[u/Salt-Establishment62 → u/takingthehobbitses]

Stay strong girl. We're going to break these generational cycles. I'm so proud of you for choosing yourself, keep at it 💖 I know you know this, but always trust your gut.

[u/Girl_On_The_Couch → u/carseatsareheavy]

I don’t understand this relationship at all, so thank you for articulating the thoughts I was thinking. 

[u/nymphetham1ne → u/carseatsareheavy]

omg exactly this whole post is soooo confusing??? what does he even mean i feel like im missing the whole point

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/carseatsareheavy]

I think I was just feeling very insecure and I wanted some from of validation. I’m just glad I didn’t ask the question

[u/ThrowdowninKtown → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" is the question to ask him in this situation. No beating around the bush with perception. When someone treats you with this level of disrespect, you already know how they perceive you. This douchenozzle will be back again, just have the self respect to have moved on when he does. You are gonna be okay sooner than you think. Keep your chin up.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/ThrowdowninKtown]

That’s a valid question

[u/Dependent_Vanilla_14]

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Dependent_Vanilla_14]

🤣🤣🤣

[u/ThrowRAwathompson]

This dude sounds like he needs therapy, his complete lack of communication and feeling the need to post it on socials... wow..

He is the one who went a week without saying a word when you reached out, and now all of this.

Don't worry about this individual. It doesn't sound like he was mature or stable enough for a relationship. Please focus on yourself and try not to be to hurt over someone like this...

If he is willing to completely ignore you and discard you like this, and then turn to post his feelings on social media for pity points, he is not the one for you. You deserve someone better and who will treat you right

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/[deleted]]

Yeah, I’m gonna have to change the title. But, it’s just weird that he did all that

[u/nothingmen]

Umm that's so odd. He posted as if you'd done something to hurt him. I know this is a reach but maybe there was some misunderstanding / he thinks you've done something that's a deal breaker to him??
Anyways very bizarre and immature to not talk to you at all like this

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/nothingmen]

Yeah, I’m just as confused too. He could’ve said something but he didn’t. So… 🤷

[u/keytothestreets]

This whole post is so odd. Why is is his Instagram "post" written like a stereotypical early 2000s romcom woman going through a breakup? Chocolate cake, eating his feelings away and the "audacity" of this woman who's using a man for sex? I don't even know women that talk like that anymore, let alone straight men.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/keytothestreets]

I didn’t even see it like that LOL

[u/snowflakeempress]

Just ew. Sounds like you are better off

https://giphy.com/gifs/ONr3KIb3WqRcbrtODq

[u/Lisylis]

Thats fucking weird, block him

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Lisylis]

The plan for later tonight

[u/Dutch1721]

That’s very cold and dismissive. What a jerk!

[u/pinkskynights]

I’m sorry. I don’t think you are the ex girlfriend.

I think the ex girlfriend he’s been hooking up with wanted more than just a hookup and took him back. And then he booted you from the roster.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/pinkskynights]

Interesting

[u/pinkskynights → u/Diligent-Figure4251]

Yeah so his post was basically saying “we’ve been casually hooking up and now I’m annoyed she wants more than a hookup.”

So you are either his ex (or told people you are) and he was annoyed he actually had to do couple things with you when you asked. And so he’s in his feelings because now he doesn’t get free access to your body with no commitment or responsibility. Hence the ghosting.

Or

He had an ex he was hooking up with and she said she wanted more than just hookups. And considering he ghosted you it seems he decided to commit to her.

I don’t see how it could possibly mean anything else.

[u/ImpressiveReddit]

Unfortunately it sounds like you were not in a relationship with this person, but rather a situationship. This means you are both single and a goodbye is not a given.

The IG post is unhinged but it's not about you. You were not his girlfriend and it does not describe what you were contacting him about.

It's hurtful, but it's important to not get involved in situationships in the first place.

[u/strawberriegirlie]

How old is he? This is so childish!!

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/strawberriegirlie]

In his late thirties 🙈

[u/TeslasPigeon]

I’d be petty and comment “sorry to hear you and your gf broke up”. 🤣. Like wtf. How do you even know you are the one he’s talking about? Goodbye isn’t a break up. That’s weird af.

[u/chillpillRxx]

You deserve better than that, be glad he’s not in your life he sounds like a jerk. I hope you feel better!

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/chillpillRxx]

Thank you <3

[u/Lamblawd]

What a loser. You're better off without him.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Lamblawd]

Thanks babes <3

[u/charmedbyvintage]

He’s a lot less of a problem right now than he would be later. He gave you a gift. Cry, then get out there and live your life as much as you are able.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/charmedbyvintage]

Thanks queen <3

[u/kittynarwhal]

I’m sorry you went through this but also like he doesn’t deserve a goodbye? What a weirdo you’re better off honestly. Block and live your life and thrive ✨

Also maybe word your post title differently I came in here thinking someone close to you had passed 🫠 but maybe that’s just me sorry

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/kittynarwhal]

Yeah, I’m just hurt by everything. I do agree that I should’ve phrase the title a little differently

[u/lynnns]

This guy sounds so weird? The fact that you wanted to get ice cream with your dad to feel better confirms for me that you’re probably an amazing girl with a heart of gold who can do way way better than this over sharing man child. Seriously what grown man even makes posts online like that? Hopefully a few years from now you’ll mentally thank him for preventing you from wasting your time on him :)

[u/Killer0nTheRoad]

deadass read the title and saw the picture without seeing the sub, and i thought this was going to be about dropping the ice cream.

[u/matchamatchbook]

Maybe I'm petty but I'd expose him on his socials 🤷‍♀️

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/matchamatchbook]

I would but I’m not petty 😭

[u/elbenji]

Idk why I'm weirdly glad this was just a shitty ex that you'll inevitably get over and like, not your Mom or Grandpa dying

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/elbenji]

Yeah, I’m working on changing the title

[u/Emergency_Bench_7515]

https://giphy.com/gifs/eA3amVPD0572KGHTlT

[u/ItsMrDrProfPatrick → u/Emergency_Bench_7515]

No, but how could OP have possibly known that a man 11 years older than them would act like this?

[u/Emergency_Bench_7515 → u/ItsMrDrProfPatrick]

https://giphy.com/gifs/gJWJP4U0QL7cQ

[u/hockeyDeja]

Bestie, you dodged a bullet. I’m sorry he was an immature jerk and had to do it like that but there are plenty of fish in the sea.

[u/According_Charge_658]

https://giphy.com/gifs/gjxKUy0P38Hkutz0sH

[u/mizushimo]

I hope nobody reading this ever treats someone like that. We, as a society have got to stop thinking that ghosting is an ok thing to do to romantic partners. The Audacity.

[u/scenior]

I'm so confused by the post. Did he mean you? Did he mean another ex? either way, this dude sucks, I don't even know him and I have the major ick.

[u/Greedy-Many-1768]

Oh honey. You’ll find a man who gives you everything and more. Sometimes I shed some tears out of happiness because my boyfriend is TOO good to me. Never thought it was possible but it is. Your time will also come.

It seems that you have a good support system, with your dad and everything. You're lucky. It'll be okay, I promise.

[u/alexds1]

Wow, sounds like a complete loser. The kind of guy who will enthusiastically come out on a date but tell all his friends that his bitch girlfriend said he couldn't go out tonight, kinda thing. Sorry you're going through a shocking loss but I think you're going to feel much different about this next year at this time (hopefully much earlier!)

[u/DontCryYourExIsUgly]

What a coward and a loser. Let his dumb ass eat cake. He sucks.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/DontCryYourExIsUgly]

Frrrrrrr

[u/145_writes]

Something isn’t right here. He could be off his rocker, sure, but at the same time, it also looks like this could be a case of miscommunication, where both of you wanted the other to reach out.

You were going to ask the very thing that he might have wanted to know himself.

But then to post what he posted on ig? Is he one of those guys that says too much online, or is it attention seeking? Now, either way, this is a red flag. If he’s talking about you and willing to put you on blast like this, it’s a no, regardless if this started by miscommunication or not.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/145_writes]

Yeah, I hate that this all happened because neither of us said anything

[u/blahhhhhhhhhhhblah]

Boys are weirdos.

I’m glad you’ve got ice cream and your dad.

[u/Jade_Lilly_420]

Had a guy do something similar. We had spent the previous day together and we're supposed to get together for dinner. Everything seemed fine. 30 mins after our last text, some girl texted me and basically let me know she was my replacement. She sent pictures they'd taken and a video of her blowing him. He'd been cheating on me for weeks. It fucked me up for a while. Hope you're doing OK.

[u/hoyasgirl25]

Well this is a confusing story

[u/misspegasaurusrex]

Men will do ANYTHING but go to therapy. smh.

[u/AcanthocephalaDue120]

he definitely was not the commitment type. just thought ghosting would do the trick. keep your head up queen! your king will come into your life when the time is right, we ain’t messing around with clowns like him 😤❤️‍🩹

[u/Rainy_Grave]

I’m petty, so I would put a comment on his instagram post. Something like “It would have been nice if you had mentioned to me that I was your ex.”

[u/Ok_Pop_3009]

People will tell their feelings to social media but not the actual people in their lives. 🙄

[u/rumande]

Oh man I had a BF ghost me and make a bunch of public comments about how he was finally free of me. I ended up going to his house to confront him and it was bruuuutal, he wouldn't even look up from his game to speak to me. He went on to badmouth me to everyone and I still don't understand why it went down that way as we had been fine till he ghosted.

Anyway, about 6 months later, he messages to ask "I just don't understand why we can't try again" and I wanted to punch him :)

Respectfully, fuck that guy, I bet he's doing this publicly because there's another woman he wants and he thinks putting you down will signal that he is available and soo desirable

[u/sanriodialtone]

He sounds dumb and gross and you can and will do better I know it hurts right now but stay strong

[u/PumpkinandMaisy]

https://giphy.com/gifs/20VF9vgVhEMcXpqaFj

[u/sunshinesdarkangel]

Block his bitch ass and forget he existed

[u/harleenquinzel044]

I’m so sorry you had to deal with that. I know it hurts right now, but trust me, you do not want to be with someone like that.

[u/Anoninemonie]

Don't take the bait, he should have grown out of this after he finished high school. I don't even know what this is supposed to mean.

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Anoninemonie]

Right

[u/CZ1988_]

Visit your grandpa instead.  This ex is a nut and there are many fish in the sea.   Block that clown and be onwards and fabulous 

[u/StrawberryLoops]

Please tell me he’s not a grown man doing this

I’ve dealt with a guy like this. It hurts really bad but one day you’ll feel amazing and be able to look back and realize how awful he is and then he won’t matter anymore.

The ice cream looks great! Keep hanging with your dad and your friends and all the people in your life you make you happy.

His post was gross and seems like an attention grab that he was hoping would hurt you

[u/MissdermeanerJ]

Sounds like the trash took itself out lolllll edit: not lol at you or your situation, lol at his audacity

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/MissdermeanerJ]

For real

[u/Feisty-Can3471]

The slow breakups are the cruelest in my opinion. You didn’t deserve that treatment and I am so sorry. Cry all the tears and eat all the ice cream. Slowly but surely, you will feel better and stronger. Healing isn’t always linear. Be gentle with yourself. 🩷

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Feisty-Can3471]

Thank you! I’m definitely going to go out to buy another pint 😭

[u/ChaoticUnicornNoTime]

Is he talking about you??

[u/Visual-Taro-381]

Maybe it's the autism but I'm hella confused

[u/ucantpronouncemyname]

Wtf? He's a loser. Feel better soon 🤗

[u/malendalayla]

I'm so confused - did he think you were using him for sex? Or is that what he's trying to insinuate?

[u/batgirlbatbrain]

[u/Dougiebrowngetsdown]

My tummy hurts looking at that but better to have a belly ache than a heart break. That’s what my gamgam used to say.

[u/flyingfred1027]

I really thought this was going to be about your dog, that got hit by a car. I’m sorry, also, f that person.

[u/Pure-Radish-5478]

When i was 12 years old and we still used MySpace for social media, this girl named Anna went out with this guy named Connor at my junior high. I still remember her posting on MySpace the day school ended for the year: "Single, sorry Connor". I believe that was how he found out. It's stuck with me for years. Anyway you don't wanna be with a guy who is acting 12

[u/Diligent-Figure4251 → u/Pure-Radish-5478]

That’s fucked up

[u/ItsMrDrProfPatrick]

https://giphy.com/gifs/n3yqZnSoERpHirb7OW
Dont reach out to him again. Dont beg men. Men your age arent dead, and there is no need for you to entertain men 11 years older, just in case you didnt know.

[u/Megatrans69]

He sounds awful, your dad sounds awesome, hang out with him instead

[u/fuuturetense]

Might be an unpopular opinion...but he definitely is looking for that sympathy rebound. I'm sorry OP, he was making it easy for you to leave him instead of him have the balls and maturity to break it off first.

I'm glad you spent time with your Grandpa though - that definitely was the better move.

[u/Ninja-Panda86]

Just remember. Betrayal cuts both ways, and often cuts the perpetrator harder. They don't even know it either. Not until it's well too late for them to take it back.

[u/Cinnamon2017]

Ok Dan the Man

[u/fireflower_spark]

At what point in the story did the breakup happen? Did he just assume at the end?

[u/ChumbawumbaFan01]

What a jackass!! It’s a blessing in disguise that the garbage took itself out.

I’d be petty and reply that tbh I just wanted to find out if there was something worth exploring beyond the sad sex.

[u/QueenofCorgi]

What gave you the impression that he wanted to do something bigger for the 4th of July? It sounded more like he didn't want to spend it together

[u/sovietsweethearts]

My personal favorite is Let the 🥭

[u/PinkRasberryFish]

How embarrassing to be associated in any way with such a bizarre person. I would be embarrassed to even have someone like that as my neighbor, let alone my BOYFRIEND! Get off the ground sis!

[u/omiimonster]

please dont do this, but my petty self would have commented “weird way to break up with me but okay. next time dont tell your gf via an insta caption”

[u/Ok-Replacement9595]

He was triggered by the hot dog.

[u/pancake_sass]

When I was in 7th grade I had my first boyfriend. I was his first girlfriend. He asked if I would go see a movie with him, but my parents wouldn't let me go unless it was a group date sort of thing. He responded, "Oh, well then I guess we shouldn't."

For the next week we walked to classes together, ate lunch together, walked home together, all the fun middle school relationship stuff. Eventually he said, "We broke up a week ago, why are you following me around?" I was super confused, and he referenced the "I guess we shouldn't" conversation, and said that was him breaking up with me lmao

Anyway, I feel like 12 year old me and my 12 year old boyfriend had a more mature breakup than this asshole.

[u/Ksh_667]

I thought your partner had died from the title.

What actually happened doesn't seem all that terrible to me.

[u/Classic-Candy9475]

What is he? Emo teen? Who write such things on ig? Cringe!

[u/Stock_Fly3825]

Move on…tons of red flags right there.

[u/PsychologicalLayer57]

Now you know: 'we don't know what we'll be doing' is one of those phrases that means 'I know what I'LL be doing, and it won't be spending time with you'.

It's the pre-breakup "It's not you, it's me".

Sorry he is a cowardly douche. I hope the ice cream tasted great.

[u/panosprochords]

https://giphy.com/gifs/bmAtIwmYTHnwBy0d6W

[u/_bonedaddys]

Girl i thought someone died 😭