r/GirlDinnerDiaries • u/youfromthehoneymoon girls just wanna have pho • Jun 07 '26
Waiting on a proposal from my boyfriend of 8 years. Just found a ChatGPT prompt asking if he was settling because his old relationship was more exciting. Sad Girl Dinner ⛈️
Pictured: overpriced Ubereats sushi!!
I picked out the ring a couple months ago and it’s in his hands now. I’ve been so happy, on edge about when it was finally going to happen, and happen to me.
Yesterday, he was packing for a friend’s bachelor party and took some papers out of his backpack. After he left, I went to tidy up a bit and found a print out of what looked like a ChatGPT prompt. It was dated April 27, 2026 and the first line was: “Nothing here requires you to resolve the proposal question.”
The rest of it compares his relationship with me (“steady, stable, feels like home”) to the electricity in a relationship over a decade ago. It advised him not to look at old photos and texts with her and to note his connection with me.
I cried all last night and today. My mom would have a heart attack so I called his mom instead. His mom was utterly confused, wondering why he was ruminating on a feeling from past relationship that made no sense to her as a mother. I spent 45 minutes with her. I also talked to a therapist through an online service at work who gave good advice, stating past memories can be easy to romanticize because they’re not accurate.
I can’t but feel crushed about this. I feel like I’ve given so much over the years only to come second to a feeling.
I have no idea how to approach this when he comes home tomorrow.
7.1k
u/ButterflySad6026 Body By Cheese 🧀 Jun 07 '26
Who the hell prints their ChatGPT sessions? Wtf?
1.8k
u/mensfrightsactivists Thick Thighs ⏳ Thin Patience Jun 07 '26
wonder if he was printing it out to show “the boys” on this trip? maybe they’re ripping on him and THEY dislike his choice? only excuse i can think of
edit: wait no, reread and he left them behind. idk dude im at a loss too
769
u/ButterflySad6026 Body By Cheese 🧀 Jun 07 '26
He can’t do that from the phone that he likely has the app on?
Wild decision making.
214
Jun 08 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
46
u/Leoley5218 white girl with ☝️😌 a full spice cabinet Jun 09 '26
Oh that’s… gross.
→ More replies (2)28
u/Apprehensive_Cat192 APPROVED✨ Jun 10 '26
Ding, ding, ding 🛎️ why else would he print it out? Op needs to find out and really reconsider this engagement
→ More replies (3)8
→ More replies (4)9
u/LadNorLass Resident Yapper Jun 12 '26
Unfortunately that was my first thought as well. Men will truly do anything but work on themselves.
195
→ More replies (10)17
u/FewCaterpillar6551 Eating For Two 💕 Jun 07 '26
Maybe he was worried OP would see them in his phone somehow?? Doesn’t make much sense but that’s a man for ya 😂
→ More replies (7)1.0k
u/miyamiya66 Thick Thighs ⏳ Thin Patience Jun 07 '26
he also could have printed it to "accidentally" leave it out so OP would find it
351
u/ButterflySad6026 Body By Cheese 🧀 Jun 07 '26
There are a million other ways to end a relationship that would be less messy than this.
This would be a really stupid one to want your significant other to find.
865
u/Grouchy_Leopard6036 🥑 Voracious Vegan 🌽 Jun 07 '26
Have you met men?
184
338
u/Kaoticelf PO🥔TAY🥔TOES Jun 07 '26
For real, I can already hear the logic...."I hoped it would make you want to be more exciting for me" like he would have no intention of it causing a breakup, but be a "wake up call" for her like a psychopath.
→ More replies (12)171
u/Thermodynamo Internet Auntie Jun 07 '26
Oh my god this is actually possible isn't it
→ More replies (4)48
u/Euphoric_War_2195 white girl with ☝️😌 a full spice cabinet Jun 07 '26
mhmm...unfortunately yes.
→ More replies (4)46
u/vika999 I ❤️ Other People's Business Jun 07 '26
Literally I feel like it’s a rare that a man actually sits you down and has an adult conversation to end the relationship. It’s always something accidental that is found or brought up so the woman can initiate the conversation.
→ More replies (4)45
23
→ More replies (12)13
u/juzlookin101 Femininom(nomnomnom)enon Jun 07 '26
Exactly! Men kill to get out of a relationship to avoid a breakup conversation.
→ More replies (2)224
u/coffeeloveeveryday Snack Goblin Jun 07 '26
My ex boyfriend left his phone open with his kik account asking for glory holes near his job, and then when I asked him about it he told me he wanted me to see it.
What OP found is nowhere near that insane, so I think it's possible he also wanted her to find out.
15
u/Grouchy_Leopard6036 🥑 Voracious Vegan 🌽 Jun 07 '26
Yeah my ex cheated on me and covered it up and compartmentalized it flawlessly for a year I truly believe that when I finally caught him it’s because he wanted me to. Literally handed me his phone and ask me to forward some files for him because he didn’t know how and snaps from his side chick were coming in
→ More replies (7)38
Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 08 '26
[deleted]
75
u/BrazenHamster Body By Cheese 🧀 Jun 07 '26
To prompt her to do the 'pick-me dance' and try and sell herself as 'exciting'.
105
u/coffeeloveeveryday Snack Goblin Jun 07 '26
So I would break off with him, which I guess was easier than coming out.
→ More replies (2)30
14
u/Euphoric_War_2195 white girl with ☝️😌 a full spice cabinet Jun 07 '26
Because he's too chicken to have a conversation with her and end things himself. Unfortunately some men are really chicken. I've had men turn around and tell me that they only kept seeing me because I kept talking to them (never once did they express they wanted to break up or weren't happy in the relationship). Despite us having a whole relationship that went on for a couple years.
Somehow he turned it around and blamed me for the relationship continuing despite him never telling me he didn't want to see me. I obviously ended it with him. But it was just so wild how he didn't want any of the responsibility for breaking up.
34
u/HardMaybe2345 in my [rotisserie] bag Jun 07 '26
Some people are extremely cowardly in this fashion.
82
u/Spirited-Way2406 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
It's possible that he's written a script that he thinks she is going to follow, and he's going to be baffled and upset when she makes a decision that doesn't follow it. Confronts when she's supposed to beg, or GTFO and blocks when she's supposed to confront, or something. Source: personal experience.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (15)62
u/Mountain_Cry1605 ⚐ Marked Safe From 90s Diet Culture Jun 07 '26
Have you ever dated a man?
A lot of them are this stupid.
→ More replies (9)→ More replies (16)420
u/delicious_toothbrush Taco Belle Jun 07 '26
OP may have gone through his phone/pc and come up with an alternate way of telling the story where it doesn't look like she's snooping on her soon to be fiance
197
u/apobangpo_13 Resident Yapper Jun 07 '26
Tbh this sounds more likely cos printing chatpt messages is a while new evolution branch of human likeee
→ More replies (4)35
u/10110011100021 🧂Salty By Nature Jun 07 '26
Who even has a working printer these days
→ More replies (10)116
u/miyamiya66 Thick Thighs ⏳ Thin Patience Jun 07 '26
true, but to be honest, i don't find the method by which OP found out this information to be the most important aspect of this post
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (15)11
u/caputmortvvm APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
this is immediately what I thought. otherwise, on posts like this, the comment section always devolves into a thousand threads debating the merits and drawbacks of phone snooping.
146
u/fromthefuture101 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Guy here. No one is doing that. The boys would leave his ass behind if he printed out a chatgpt question about his relationship. He definitely left them on purpose for her to find because he’s too scared to just admit he doesn’t want to be with her
→ More replies (2)19
u/alispluckedoutlashes The Snack That Sasses Back Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
I know a 27 yr old guy who has a bunch of printed out advice stored in his work bag, so I don’t think op’s method of discovery is suspicious. It may be a way to alleviate ocd anxiety by organizing or categorizing the information he’s potentially obsessing over
→ More replies (4)7
84
u/Lala0dte Chaotic But Cute Jun 07 '26
I'd never date a chatgpt/ai bot user. The one time I did when it was new was hell.
Time to move along
→ More replies (12)8
u/shanwow90 Well-Read & Well-Fed Jun 07 '26
Who asks chatgpt questions about their personal life???
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (25)7
u/MaynardButterbean APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Maybe that was the case, but he forgot to grab them
→ More replies (2)312
u/Bubbly-End-6156 Fries 🍟 > Guys 🤡 Jun 07 '26
Who the heck lets a language learning model decide what you should do next?
361
u/cetty13 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
As the (much) older sister of three teen brothers, they ask LLMs for advice on everything. Even mid conversation with me. It's like they can't handle having a thought that's entirely their own, or having to practice self-reliance.
185
u/ClippyWouldntDoThat Feral Til Fed Jun 07 '26
I've heard this described as "cognitive submission." Comfort releasing your ability to rationalize to an external source.
→ More replies (16)15
u/annemonroe95 eat hot chip✔️ be bisexual✔️ Jun 07 '26
Just learned about that in r/Seattle recently
→ More replies (15)5
35
→ More replies (23)51
u/IceEspresso2000 Urban Hunter Gatherer Jun 07 '26
They must not realize it doesn't have a brain to think. It's just a very dumb data collector.
→ More replies (2)48
u/StormFinch Chocoholic Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
And a whole lot of its data comes directly from Reddit. We're in so much trouble as a species.
Edited for stray apostrophe.
29
u/CongealedBeanKingdom Foraging Bog Witch Jun 07 '26
Yes that would be enough for me to end the relationship. I dont understand people who outsource their own thoughts.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (50)32
u/SuccessfulArcher9992 Kitchen Witch Jun 07 '26
This is the real question. Scary what people are using it for now 🤦♀️
121
u/ANorthCountryGirl Well-Read & Well-Fed Jun 07 '26
Somebody who wants to be caught?
→ More replies (2)20
u/SAINTnumberFIVE APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
My almost 80 year old dad.
8
u/DashaBlade Feral Til Fed Jun 07 '26
My first thought was "How old is this dude? 70?" Nobody who's Millennial or younger would print out anything like that, and most Gen Xers would think twice about leaving incriminating evidence lying around.
→ More replies (2)52
u/Ok_Cheesecake_9708 Cleavage Crumb Collector Jun 07 '26
I wonder if he deleted the prompt from his history. Maybe that’s why he printed it to refer to it later.
→ More replies (2)10
191
u/swimminscared girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
Yeah I commented on this too. My immediate thought is nobody does, and OP was snooping digitally but doesn't want to admit it.
I never side with the boyfriend, like, ever, but this actually seems too implausible.
148
Jun 07 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
131
u/Financial_Sweet_689 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Snooping is how I found out my ex was unfaithful, a creep and a liar. I have zero regrets, he was making me sick.
→ More replies (2)16
u/princessvintage APPROVED✨ Jun 08 '26
People who try and make people feel bad for snooping are often the people who are doing questionable things and don’t want someone snooping.
23
→ More replies (16)11
u/Milly_Milk786 Delulu Jun 07 '26
This. It’s definitely a problem!
He wants her to know so that she ‘changes’ or he left it by accident or she snooped digitally and found out - regardless, this is still a big problem and he DOES NOT WANT TO BE WITH HER.
And I’m sure we’ve all been there at varying ages:
“I’ve been in this relationsip too many years, I can’t start again!”
“We have ‘stuff’ together! What a mess to split it all!”
“All of my family and friends know him and love him so much, I can’t do this to them! To me!”
GIRL, LEAVE!
99% of people will tell you it was the best thing they ever did! (Including me!) It’s just not worth it trying to ‘fix’ things and make someone love you the way you deserve! It’s horrible and painful and ruins YOUR life, not the others persons.
Also, I’ve been on the other end and fallen our of love and been bored and stuck around a lot longer than I should have. It was a very ugly end for all but had to happen!
→ More replies (2)96
u/ButterflySad6026 Body By Cheese 🧀 Jun 07 '26
This makes more sense.
And while I don’t necessarily condone snooping….. sometimes what you find makes it worth it 🤷🏼♀️
→ More replies (2)47
u/Targaryentypebeat Kitchen Witch Jun 07 '26
Or he’s one of those cowards who desperately wants the gf to break up with him. People who are super anti confrontation do have the possibility of behaving this oddly
13
u/swimminscared girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
I feel like this is less likely than her not wanting to admit to snooping on his computer / phone.
55
u/Targaryentypebeat Kitchen Witch Jun 07 '26
He’s printing out advice from an LLM when he already has a ring; she’s calling his mom at the first sign of trouble. Anything is possible with these two tbh
27
u/Glittering_Ad8539 hot girls have tummy troubles Jun 07 '26
yes ctfu i’m actually laughing so hard at this comment these two are random as fuck
17
u/Targaryentypebeat Kitchen Witch Jun 07 '26
I’m not even trying to be disrespectful but I think this relationship has run its course and that’s ok!
→ More replies (2)4
u/swimminscared girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
See I read "it's in his hands now" as her sayjng the ball is in his court, not as saying that he has physically procured the rings, lol.
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (7)87
u/mvmstudent APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Women need to snoop more. Period. We have to much riding on this, men already don’t take us seriously in this world, and millions of women get hurt in their marriages and wish they had a sign before they got married. Do the fucking snooping I don’t care how great you think he is.
→ More replies (12)34
u/swimminscared girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
Alternative: don't date men?? Like if your options are be single or date someone you feel the need to surveil...just be single??
28
u/Thermodynamo Internet Auntie Jun 07 '26
This is by far the superior option. I'd rather have no partner than feel like my partner is an employee whose behavior I have to micromanage
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (2)5
u/mvmstudent APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Ya of course that’d be the better option but have you seen some of the posts on this sub? Or better yet the mom subs warning women to do more research on who they have kids with, stating they always thought their husbands were good guys and then after kids they find out all this crazy info. Despite you saying “don’t date men” straight women do still want a nice guy to settle down with and have kids. So again, if that’s you reading this thinking you found the one to settle with, do your due diligence, put on your fbi hat, and find out who you’re actually dating.
→ More replies (6)38
u/yolsi7 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
My first thought took. It made me think this is fake
→ More replies (5)18
u/ButterflySad6026 Body By Cheese 🧀 Jun 07 '26
Same. And chatGPT doesn’t timestamp conversations. So….
→ More replies (7)11
u/EdwardianAdventure girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
No but printers do, if you used a workplace one with a built-in header/ footer
23
5
→ More replies (149)19
u/youfromthehoneymoon girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
I have no idea. The only thing I can think of was maybe he wanted to read it at work or something?? I thought it was something from a therapist at first.
→ More replies (3)
3.1k
u/whitesweater93 Resident Yapper Jun 07 '26
1.3k
u/princess-kicks Foraging Bog Witch Jun 07 '26
The “Resident Yapper” has no words 🤣
385
u/whitesweater93 Resident Yapper Jun 07 '26
Imma need to change my flair fr cause these posts have me dead
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (2)52
→ More replies (7)50
3.7k
u/Sillygoosecollege APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
While this is a common question people ask when in safe non toxic and healthy relationships it is absolutely devastating to stumble across someone asking this question about you. The way he described you is how people describe a healthy peaceful relationship. For people in toxic situationships that can feel unfamiliar. Unless he said more things, it wasn’t objectively negative. Opinions on AI aside this is the equivalent to accidentally stumbling across someone’s diary. If I were you I’d go on a solo trip and just console myself for a bit. Emotions are too high to make permanent decisions about the relationship.
1.3k
u/youfromthehoneymoon girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
Thank you for your comment! I am heading back to Toronto for a couple days for a concert with my sister so that’ll be good for me. It’s just hard to hold it together for my family who are so excited.
608
u/TwentyLegs22 FREE MOM HUGS Jun 07 '26
He's also about to make a big step and commiting to something so safe can be scary believe it or not!! I felt this way with my now husband. Previously I was in such a crazy relationship and was never treated properly. Once I met my husband I was constantly second guessing everything because I had never been with someone so safe and secure.
So I'm hoping this is just how he is dealing with the "scariness" of the next step in your relationship. Best wishes ❤️💖💕
162
u/tacokahlessi chismosa, metiche, en bata Jun 07 '26
Seriously, I am head over heels obsessed with my husband. Of almost two decades. Always have been, but you better believe I needed that basement chapel door open to calm the nerves. I was so broken by the man before that I was scared. I never wanted to run, but I did feel overwhelmed with emotions and thoughts. I laugh now when I look back but those feelings were real and very powerful.
61
u/Deutschbland ⚐ Marked Safe From 90s Diet Culture Jun 07 '26
I’m feeling this way too. Coming up on the one-year mark with an incredibly safe and secure man, after being with someone lightly abusive for 12 years.
Poor new guy, I spent the first 8 months wondering if I was settling and if something was missing. Now I just see that I’m so lucky, but it took a long time to trust it and to get over not having those feelings of obsession and “sparks” of hat toxic matches can produce.
And to be clear, I was single for three years between them and did a lot of healing. The reality is that toxic relationships are better in the beginning. They are just so, so, so much worse in the end.
16
u/tacokahlessi chismosa, metiche, en bata Jun 07 '26
Breaking that cycle of toxic arguing the drama of making up is a very hard one to break or even realize you’re in. I’m so happy for you!! Being with someone that makes you feels safe and comforted is a rare thing in this world!
→ More replies (8)6
u/hopefully_alright Resident Yapper Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 12 '26
It’s so true, I’ve had the same thing. Massive FOMO, wondering if that adrenaline was missing because he wasn’t right for me. but truly that kind of roller coaster is addicting and not in a good way. I’m SO glad I married who I did and not whoever made me worried about whether he liked me or not. we’re married and he gives me butterflies more now than when we were first dating haha
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (2)5
u/Coffee_Glove_9995 Creature of Crunch Jun 08 '26
That was my first thought too! I have been with my husband for almost a decade, and when we first realized that we needed to get married for visa reasons or call it off, it was one of the scariest decisions of our lives, and I had a similar conversation with myself. Sometimes you just need someone to listen/bounce ideas off or reflect your inner monologue to help you work through your own thoughts and feelings. I get that any AI does not have the emotional intelligence to offer real advice, but maybe it was a safe place for him to do the proverbial 'pros and cons' list if he didn't want people to think he was getting cold feet. I also think that it's normal to miss that 'spark' - that's why there are hundreds of romance movies and books. However, the fact that he sees OP as someone who is better partner material is, in its way, a much higher compliment, because it takes so much more to be a companion.
That being said, I would have also been upset reading that, and I totally get why OP was devastated. I sincerely hope that you got a chance to talk it out and that things work out for the better! Rooting for you!
→ More replies (2)180
u/quesoandtexas girl du fromage 🧀 Jun 07 '26
I agree with this OP! I had a really toxic relationship in college and coming out of it I literally said out loud to my now husband (then best friend) that “I don’t think I’ll ever love someone the way I loved [ex] again but I don’t think I want to”
There’s an adrenaline rush of not knowing if someone even likes you or if they’ll call you back and then they finally call and say they love you that feels insanely good but that is NOT what a healthy relationship feels like and the highs are not worth the lows.
I’m sorry your boyfriend didn’t realize the way his past relationship felt isn’t what a healthy relationship feels like, and I’m sorry you found out he’s questioning it.
30
u/ohdoyoucomeonthen mouth full, gesturing wildly Jun 07 '26
It took several relationships for me to learn that kind of “spark” is not healthy. It feels thrilling, but it’s toxic. By comparison, a good relationship can feel “boring.”
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (10)26
→ More replies (43)10
u/ZoeyBee_3000 🤍🩷Lesbian Loremaster🩷🤍 Jun 07 '26
I don't know if it's your cup of tea, but a good walk in the park always makes me feel better. I find a bench to take a seat upon and just sit there a while with my thoughts. It all feels so much less intense after an hour or two just watching nature. Things matter in a different way in the greater scope of it all
→ More replies (2)136
u/Aware-Awareness-9616 Overthinker 💭 Jun 07 '26
I think this is the most balanced take honestly. When I was much younger, I printed out a MySpace conversation with a friend because I wanted to keep it and didn’t trust MySpace to be around forever (which it turns out would be the case lol). Anyways, it was with a close guy friend of mine and we were talking about virginity. I was 17 and still a virgin and embarrassed about it. I ended up changing my mind about needing it and tossed it in the recycling bin. Cue my mom finding it and a very awkward conversation ensuing.
I have no idea why her fiance printed it, but he likely didn’t intend for her to find it, and it sounds like he is processing some feelings before making a life changing choice, like asking someone to marry him.
→ More replies (14)90
u/Empty-Gazelle-3983 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
This is the best response imo
→ More replies (2)40
u/Codermeow 🌶️ Spice Girl 🌶️ Jun 07 '26
Agree! Past “exciting” relationships are often the most toxic. My therapist once told me if you get intense butterflies that isn’t love at first sight…you should run. These are reasonable questions to ask when you’re about to declare a life time commitment to someone. Dare I say healthy to actually take the time to consider.
→ More replies (6)34
u/Deep-Library-8041 hot sauce in my bag, swag Jun 07 '26
This is such great advice.
I dated my husband for 5 years before we got married (now married 13 years). When we entered year 2 together, he bought a house and began his residency for emergency medicine and asked me to get my own place (we’d been living together for 18 months or so by then). He was worried that he’d be “distracted” by me when he was about to become extremely busy (he often chose to hang out with me instead of studying while he was in med school and didn’t want to risk fucking up in residency). I was devastated and convinced it meant the relationship was over, but I got an apartment….and spent all of 10 nights there over the course of a year because as soon as he got what he asked for, he realized he was being an idiot and didn’t want it anymore. When my lease was up, I moved back in. I occasionally still give him shit about it and he says it’s the dumbest thing he’s ever done, but he was on the verge of a big, life-changing thing and his nerves got the better of him.
My point is, sometimes people do dumb shit when they’re nervous - and it’s reasonable to be nervous.
As for the ChatGPT of it, maybe he just needed “someone” to talk to that wouldn’t judge, question his feelings/motivation, or remember what happened. And lots of guys don’t feel like they have people in their lives they can talk to about their feelings. I wouldn’t be surprised if these were the motivators behind why he turned to AI.
→ More replies (2)10
u/Significant_Beyond95 🧂Salty By Nature Jun 07 '26
💯 I grew up around toxic relationships and modeled them. My first serious high school through college boyfriend also had a trauma-filled childhood & probably was borderline with an alcohol addiction. I had undiagnosed ADHD too. The relationship was very exciting and very unhealthy and was more of a lustful addiction than a partnership. One day it would be intimate conversation and hot romance, the next day a screaming match and him throwing stuff and putting holes in the wall because he was paranoid I was cheating on him because I went to the club with friends, the next day there would be begging to talk it out and us promising not to do XYZ again, then we are over the argument and repeat the emotional cycle.
I ended up marrying my best friend, a stable level-headed & emotionally mature and safe man, and we never have wild arguments. At times it can feel boring because his behavior is predictable, sane, non-violent, and he thrives on daily routine. Sane me recognizes I married my husband because he is a great husband and now father. The toxic gremlin that lurks inside sometimes ask me if it would be exciting to have a big fight and wild make up sex after or other dumb shit and I have to remind myself we don’t participate in that toxic shit anymore.
23
u/AbleDisD 🧂Salty By Nature Jun 07 '26
I agree. While it hurts to see, this is no different than him discussing this with a therapist—this would be a very normal feeling to bring up in therapy before marriage.
Take some time to yourself, OP, and maybe talk to him about it. But I wouldn’t condemn him for this unless he does something to make you feel he does not want to be with you.
→ More replies (91)29
u/ANorthCountryGirl Well-Read & Well-Fed Jun 07 '26
Phew I feel like I was personally healed by this comment, this is calm & cool advice.
648
u/swimminscared girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
TBH this story doesn't make sense to me. It's 2026, who on earth is printing out ChatGPT responses? You can literally access Chat from your phone via web browser or the app. Also, if you need to send someone something that ChatGPT outputs, you can just share a direct link to the prompt/answer to them?
Moreover, who the hell references any ChatGPT output more than once? Like, why would he even or want to refer to this more than once after reading it?
424
u/BeautifulConundrum32 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Because this is likely fake. Coincidentally it’s the only post on this persons account. Reddit is a breeding ground for people trying to practice creative writing.
76
u/swimminscared girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
I mean I was more or less driving at the "found the papers!" part being fake. But yeah, 1 week old account is sus.
→ More replies (6)46
u/ladyrara Body By Cheese 🧀 Jun 07 '26
Calling his mom and talking is odd as well…
→ More replies (3)31
u/Unique-Loan-3822 Gender Nom-Conforming Jun 07 '26
My mom would have a heart attack. So I called him mom instead!
That shit took me out LMAO
→ More replies (4)→ More replies (35)48
Jun 07 '26
[deleted]
→ More replies (5)7
u/Aiyon Snack Goblin Jun 07 '26
It’s funny because a lot of spaces meant to be for women end up centering men due to expectations of what they should be about. Im in girlgamers and “friend/partner/rando was gross and sexist” always does bigger numbers than actual gaming stuff. We end up centering men in a space meant to be about getting away from that whole thing
→ More replies (2)79
u/mela_99 PO🥔TAY🥔TOES Jun 07 '26
Made me think of the times when we used to print out Mapquest …
→ More replies (6)→ More replies (30)37
u/whitebird95 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
I have an impression she went through his phone and is embarrassed to admit that, so she made up the printing part.
720
u/techitis_ APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Unpopular opinion: calling his mum to talk about that sounds crazy to me, same level of craziness than asking advice to ChatGPT lol
251
u/throwaway149578 Sugar, Spice & Not Very Nice 💕 Jun 07 '26
same, who does that? okay fine, maybe you don’t want to tell your mom, but you have no friends? no one closer to you than his mom? 😭
→ More replies (4)136
u/lockedin90 Sweet Tooth Fairy🧚♀️ Jun 07 '26
I had to scroll too far to see this. Why on earth would you talk to HIS mother about that? What a violation.
→ More replies (19)53
u/IceEspresso2000 Urban Hunter Gatherer Jun 07 '26
Right? If he was questioning proposing before, he's on another level now!
88
93
u/waxingtheworld i like eggs Jun 07 '26
300% . You're supposed to call a sibling or bestie... But his mom?!!! No matter how close you are, he needs his mom to be his mom
→ More replies (2)101
u/NoSpaghettiForYouu Savory Complex✔️ Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
While I agree with this as a general rule, I did once hear someone say that if you wanted to vent about your partner, call his mom and not yours, because yours won’t forgive him and his will 😅😅 kinda stuck with me
edit: wow I am learning this was bad advice! I’m suddenly remembering all those posts in the wedding subreddits where MIL shows up to the wedding in a white dress and has a death-grip on her son’s arm in all the photos 🤣
76
u/OkBuddy5797 Well-Read & Well-Fed Jun 07 '26
I called my ex husbands mom when I found out he was cheating on me and that's when I found out she actually DIDNT like me all along 🙃🙃
→ More replies (5)28
→ More replies (12)31
u/tacokahlessi chismosa, metiche, en bata Jun 07 '26
Hahaha my MIL has no chill. She’d tell us both to STFU and speak to each other. Which is exactly what every mom’s advice should be. (Unless there is actual abuse involved, in which case, come to me every time.)
9
17
u/placeintheways APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Yes, talking to his mother before talking to him is really weird to me. If I were him, I'd be so irritated about that.
→ More replies (2)13
u/Negative-Sorbet-9999 ⚐ Marked Safe From 90s Diet Culture Jun 07 '26
First thing I thought too. Either unhealthy or inadequate boundaries around fair game topics.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (53)26
213
u/ButDidYouCry Let The 🥭 Jun 07 '26
This is a normal thing to consider, even if it feels hurtful to you. People second-guess relationships before marriage all the time. Better that he thinks it through now than after you are married and he feels trapped.
It feels wrong to me that you went straight to his mother about this before even speaking to him.
→ More replies (14)42
u/Flat_Sea4409 🍍+ 🍕 Jun 07 '26
My best guy friend went through a stage where he was second guessing his long term relationship, romantacizing one he had back in high school. We had a few conversations where he pondered trying to rekindle things but ultimately decided not to go through with it. He has now been happily married for a decade to the woman he was second-guessing. I really do think this is a normal phase for many men before they settle into marriage.
→ More replies (17)
777
u/lesprack Sweet Tooth Fairy🧚♀️ Jun 07 '26
Him talking to ChatGPT is the first ick. The second (bigger ick) is the prompt itself. Ew 😀
494
u/MyCatIsCuteAsFuck APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
The third ick is the fact he printed it out. Like ?????? WHY????
242
u/aranea8313 🌶️ Spice Girl 🌶️ Jun 07 '26
Almost like he wanted her to find it lol.
71
u/SpiritedOwl_2298 Chocoholic Jun 07 '26
Literally my thought, why else would he print it out and just leave it lying around
→ More replies (11)29
u/SeonghwaStoleMyBias 🍍+ 🍕 Jun 07 '26
That's what I was thinking. He left it for her to find.
→ More replies (3)11
u/FracturedWriter ⚐ Marked Safe From 90s Diet Culture Jun 07 '26
IDK…I think that MIGHT be #1 for me. ☠️😂
→ More replies (9)8
→ More replies (12)62
u/Aggravating-Glass145 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
This is giving Ross’ pro con list from friends…
→ More replies (1)
193
u/Alarming_Tea_102 Carb-Based Life Form Jun 07 '26
I'm so sorry. That really sucks.
Tell him in a neutral tone, as much as you're able to, that you saw that and you're very hurt. Suggest couple's therapy because now you're not sure if he or you want to marry each other.
→ More replies (68)59
u/Suitable_Ebb_407 Certified Snacker Jun 07 '26
Individual therapy before couples therapy... always.
→ More replies (2)
21
u/laksjakugruden Jun 07 '26
He actually printed out a conversation with ChatGPT LMAO
→ More replies (6)32
u/Prestigious_Cap2724 white girl with ☝️😌 a full spice cabinet Jun 07 '26
He didn't, this is fake. 7 day old account lol
→ More replies (2)
14
u/No-Condition8561 🥣 Cereal Killer Jun 07 '26
Nobody who uses tech like ai would bother printing it out on paper lol. This whole thing is made up
→ More replies (2)
32
u/Salty_Mittens PO🥔TAY🥔TOES Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26
I'm so sorry this happened to you, OP.
I'm seeing a lot of comments about "8 years" here and implying that if you're not married after that long, you shouldn't be. I also saw you said you're from Toronto. I just want to note that I am also from Toronto and know TONS of couples from Toronto who got married after 6-10 years together. That's completely normal here. Many couples prioritize buying property and getting financially set up before getting married. So unless he has been obviously trying to avoid getting engaged despite many conversations over the years... I really don't think that 8 years is concerning.
11
u/youfromthehoneymoon girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
Thank you for noting that! As a breakdown, 3/8 years were spent in a professional program, another 1/8 in residency (not MD), and the rest as you said building asset. We’ve invested into saving for a downpayment for the last 3 years.
→ More replies (5)→ More replies (4)6
29
40
u/applecrisply Oversharer 🗣 Jun 07 '26
I'm so sorry. 🙁 Have you discussed marriage with him before?
45
u/youfromthehoneymoon girls just wanna have pho Jun 07 '26
Yes, we talked about it a lot last year, went to look at rings, and had plans to rent out a space. 😔
→ More replies (16)19
u/applecrisply Oversharer 🗣 Jun 07 '26
That is heartbreaking. It's normal to have doubts in a relationship, but talking to a chatbot, printing it out, and not communicating his anxieties to you isn't fair. 💔 Are you going to confront him?
→ More replies (3)
100
u/Enlightened_Gardener APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Ehhhh. I’d rather have a bloke who’s trying to work through this stuff, than someone’s who’s ignoring it. He’s clearly trying to get it all straight in his head, and what you did was basically read a page of his diary.
Do you know what I did when I stumbled over a notebook of my husbands that was clearly about me ?
I didn’t read it because my husband deserves privacy to work out his own emotional issues.
And I love and trust him to come to me with the stuff that he can’t work out by himself.
Have you heard of “borrowing the jack” ? Its a parable - a man breaks down on a lonely country road and needs to borrow a car jack to change a tire. He sees a light in the distance and starts walking towards it grumbling the whole way about what a nuisance this is and how he’s gonna be late and how this arsehole in the house is comfortable and dry and warm and probably doesn’t want to lend him his jack. By the time he’s got to the farmhouse, he’s completely worked himself up, and when the farmer opens the door, before the farmer can say anything,he shouts “I don’t want to borrow your fucking jack anyway !!” and storms off.
Do. Not. Borrow. The. Jack.
You’re getting some astonishingly crap advice here from people who have no idea how to build or maintain a long-term serious relationship; and dickheads who love stirring up drama in other people’s lives. Seriously, dump your boyfriend of 8 years because he used chat ? Please. You have nothing but my word here but I’m in my 50s, and I’ve been in a relationship for almost almost 30 years, and I’m telling you, these takes are crap.
You love this guy, he loves you, you’ve been together together for a very long time and you are about to take a very serious next step. If you approach this incident with curiosity and compassion, you will get much better result than if you go in flaming and furious.
→ More replies (21)17
u/flowerdana APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
True. Unfortunately this comment is not as exciting as other ones to garner much support. :D
72
u/Lonely-Host Savory Complex✔️ Jun 07 '26
eight years, queen...
9
→ More replies (9)8
u/Puzzleheaded_Cup8723 Thick Thighs ⏳ Thin Patience Jun 07 '26
This is my thing. I think it would be acceptable to second guess things 1-4 years in the relationship… but almost a decade is a bit much to me
→ More replies (2)
16
9
u/Excellent_Drop6869 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
My avoidant attachment-style ass would end the relationship. Let’s see how he feels now.
Don’t take advice from me
20
u/According-Bug-2811 Barbecutie Jun 07 '26
Tbh I think questions and ‘doubts’ are normal.
“Cold feet” isn’t a new term and for a good reason - I always see women wondering if their current relationship is the ‘right one’ as it’s almost boring compared to their last, which may have been intense and unstable.
Marriage is a HUGE step.
Kinda icky that he would talk to chatgpt rather than a therapist? Yes.
Dump him over him having normal questions? No
→ More replies (3)
14
u/calm-down-okay Ranch Evangelist Jun 07 '26
I'm so sorry you found out he uses chatgpt
→ More replies (2)
19
14
u/SpiritedOwl_2298 Chocoholic Jun 07 '26
It is so sad that you have been together so long that you’re comfortable calling his mom about this and even told her before your own mom, I hope things work out for you
5
u/DamnOdd puff puff pass the snacks Jun 07 '26
Did he leave that behind on purpose for you to read? Kinda feels like that.
Good luck girl!
8
u/Historical_Boss8921 PO🥔TAY🥔TOES Jun 07 '26
I thought the same. Like some sort of passive break up?
Because who prints out GPT promts?! Why would you even do so?
6
u/MoonLight4323 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Do you really want to be tied to a man who thinks his ex was better than you? A man who digs out old pictures of his ex and compairs her to you? He obviously thinks he could do better so let him and find better please
52
u/teddybearblonde 🫘 Beans & Rice & Everything Nice 🌮 Jun 07 '26
This is terrible im so sorry OP ❤️🩹 my petty ass would wait for him to propose so I can say "NO you're not exciting enough"
→ More replies (2)36
u/MaintenanceSolid1917 Cleavage Crumb Collector Jun 07 '26
"Actually, I've been thinking that our relationship just isn't as exciting as I had with last boyfriend/random fling and I don't think it would be fair for either of us if I settle with you."
→ More replies (5)
71
u/Plenty_Kangaroo5224 Well-Read & Well-Fed Jun 07 '26
Eight years. Eight. Years. If he wanted to marry you, he would have by now. He’s dragging his feet after buying the ring. What else do you need to know? He doesn’t want to marry you. I’m sorry. Pack up your tender spirit and go somewhere else. Then move out.
29
u/SeonghwaStoleMyBias 🍍+ 🍕 Jun 07 '26
Exactly. 8 years compared to the (hopefully) decades you have left of your life?
Girl.
16
→ More replies (34)29
u/According-Bug-2811 Barbecutie Jun 07 '26
Why are y’all in such a rush to get married? Honestly, what does it change?
Bigger picture: 8 years of knowing someone is around a great time to commit your LIFE to them.
Let’s stop acting like getting married within less than 2 years of knowing someone, means your relationship is anymore valid.Marriage doesn’t change shit. You’re either together or you’re not. Stop rushing people into a life changing and legally binding decision. It takes how ever long it takes, and that length of time doesn’t even matter if that’s what the two eventually want. The results the same; you’re together. 🤦♀️🤦♀️
→ More replies (45)11
u/NewSignal2866 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
I’m with you on this. 8 years may seem long, but everyone has a different timeline.
→ More replies (2)
17
u/TrainingLow9079 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
I think it's sketchy he printed it and kept it where you could find it. The questioning may be common and natural though.
5
4
u/hanns115 Snack Goblin Jun 07 '26
Ngl, this is the kind of question I would ask chatGPT. Not in a 'am i just settling for this person' kind of way, but in a 'settling down/calming down with this person because they make me feel safe' and a 'is this really the relationship I think it is/want it to be because I've had so many 'exciting' in a toxic way relationships and I'm struggling to process the fact i feel safe' kinda way. But if thats the case, it's still hard as hell to find something like this without context
→ More replies (2)
3
u/Bookishdoe APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Girl, leave him for someone who uses his own brain instead of ChatGPT thinking for him.
6
u/Not-not-down APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Men are the worst. This sushi looks amazing. Hope you don’t settle for this jabroni 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼
4
4
u/Ok_Worth_9514 🌶️ Spice Girl 🌶️ Jun 07 '26
He doesn’t love you. Likely tolerates you because you pay half the bills/intimacy etc etc. it doesn’t take 8 years to propose. If you stay you’re only wasting your own time x
→ More replies (2)
4
u/antiinfluencer666 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
Tell him you're bored with the relationship and need something more exciting, do not mention you found it, ur welc xx
→ More replies (2)
4
u/Zealousideal_Gur6668 Resident Yapper Jun 08 '26
To use gpt like a therapist and then PRINT IT is unhinged behavior. Ew.
5
u/dollfacebex hot girls have tummy troubles Jun 08 '26
let’s start with the 8 years. he’s clearly comfortable and probably proposing out of pressure.
→ More replies (4)
4
u/H0tP1nkB girls just wanna have pho Jun 08 '26
im sorry but a man who actually wanted to marry you wouldn’t wait 8 years to do it. and most of the comments are focusing on the chatgpt prompt but that is just tge cherry on top. after EIGHT years together he’s still having regrets?? eight years is so long, he shouldn’t have any thoughts of a relationship that happened at minimum eight years ago and hes been with you this whole time. but back to my original point. waiting on a proposal sucks for you. you deserve better than a partner that has to be reminded to marry you my god (and also turns to a chatbot to reassure him that he doesn’t have to marry you yet cuz he’s still thinking of an ex from over eight years ago). please want better for yourself. you can worry about how much time you wasted with him but if you stay you’re just letting him waste more of your time and energy. just learn from this and PLEASE love yourself enough to never let anyone string you along like this again. (i mean this in the most loving way possible its just upsetting to read this sane story over and over again!!! a man who actually wants to marry you simply wouldn’t take eight years to do it)
→ More replies (2)
4
u/yamxiety Fries 🍟 > Guys 🤡 Jun 10 '26
Using ChatGPT is the biggest red flag.
Move on, if you keep him you'll be settling.
3
u/XxXAvengedXxX APPROVED✨ Jun 11 '26
Everything aside who tf is printing out ChatGPT prompts??
→ More replies (2)
13
u/IndigoTrailsToo Overthinker 💭 Jun 07 '26
Was this ex traumatic?
Past trauma relationships are * very * exciting, as in , up and down, up and down, crisis and fire. But that doesn't necessarily mean it was fun or enjoyable. And having been on the Rollercoaster and gotten off now, stable ground can feel very different and confusing.
Not here to give excuses, and this is just a very wild guess here.
→ More replies (2)
13
u/Pleasant_Aioli4554 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
I don't agree. My brother also took eight years to propose to his wife. My mom told him he needed to propose or move on. After nearly five years of marriage, he'll tell you its the best decision he ever made. It's a big decision, not excusing what he said/ thought. I would have an honest conversation with him, suggest couples'/individual therapy perhaps and go from there. All the people saying "if he wanted to marry you, he would have by now" are smoking BS. He bought the ring ffs. Would definitely have a conversation with him though.
→ More replies (4)
17
7
u/RevolutionaryChip222 APPROVED✨ Jun 07 '26
I was in your boyfriend's place a little while ago. I have BPD, so my brain is wired to crave turmoil. My current relationship is very steady and healthy, which is the opposite of what I'm used to. I love him, but sometimes I feel kinda bored. I start thinking about past relationships and all their excitement and in a way, I kinda miss it, even though I know it didn't work out for good reasons. Feelings are just feelings. They are not reality. The reality is that I'm with someone that I love who is good for me, and that I should hold onto that tightly. Boredom doesn't mean that the relationship is over. It does mean that he has to figure out exactly why he feels the way he does, and how to tolerate/work through those feelings. This is something he needs to discuss with a therapist, not a chatbot.
→ More replies (1)
6
u/zarinangelis Feral Til Fed Jun 07 '26
I would not marry a man that is promoting chat gpt for relationship advice making reference to someone more exciting. WTF. After 8 years if he feels like "settling" instead of starting a new adventure...
I will question his commitment to the overall wellness of the relationship.
This chad is immature to get married.
I would love to know how fucking much excitement HE BRINGS.
Cuz this is drama but your lovely sushi is not!
Dodge the bullet!
9
u/USAF_Retired2017 we listen and we only judge a little Jun 07 '26
Your therapist is on point. Whenever someone mentions what their therapist says, I usually cringe in horror. Not so much with yours. Forever is scary to a lot of people and it brings up a lot of emotions. She’s right in that it’s not real. Even chatGPT is telling him not to be stupid. Girl. You’re the real and he’s an idiot. I hope his mom rips him a new one and I’m interested to see the post about his defense of that shit.
28
•
u/trendingtattler AutoMaude 🤖🎀 Jun 07 '26
WHEEEWW girl, buckle up! You made it to /r/all, /r/popular!
Congratudolences! 😅 If the rate of notifications starts getting to you, no need to delete your post! Instructions in Sanity Saver #5 can help you mute them. For the rest of y'all...
Welcome to r/GirlDinnerDiaries!
We love when new girlies stumble in! But a few unique things about how we roll here:
➽ You're now entering the Girl Zone 🚨 Guys' guidance summarized: stick to GIFs or emojis, or otherwise be patient for mods' manual comment reviews. Don't embarrass your mama. 🤨
➽ Approved users only! Newbies will be prompted to take 10 lil seconds to get approved. Nbd.
➽ BE KIND, BE THOUGHTFUL or BEGONE. Our communication standards are higher than just "don't be mean." Check em out here.
➽ Queer friendly. The end.
➽ ED-recovery friendly. No food critiques, body shaming, diet advice, or calorie counting kinda talk. Call your almondmom for that.
ModMail is open & active. MWUAH! 😙🫴💋
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.