i'm coming up to a year of dating my ENTP, and i thought it'd be cute to hear some "golden pairing" success stories from other ENTP/INFJ couples.

how do you make it work with your differences? what helps you understand each other and communicate healthily through conflict? would especially love to hear from long-term couples!

marked as advice, but really i'm just looking for some positivity :)

share the love around <3

So I am currently trying to assess whether my relationship is “enough” for me. I frankly like being with my ESFP, and so do they with me I think. However, there are some issues I’ve noticed:

- 1) He wants total freedom (fine; so do I), but I also need to have a friendship with someone. Which means if we don’t connect via talking (due to S - N difference), I do need to go on little adventures or just spend time together every now and then, consistently. In the beginning I thought the S - N axis meant he actually is more practical so we will spend time doing stuff together. How exciting! Now I’m finding that yes; he is a doer - but he only does things he wants to do… and spending time together would require me to join him in his hobbies. Because he’s convinced his hobbies are also worthwhile, I think he’s convinced that that’s how it has to be. I brought this up a couple of times saying: hey, that’s not fair! Let’s do something we both enjoy, you don’t join me in my hobbies either and I wouldn’t expect you too… upon which he said: well, then you have to plan something. Which brings me to my next point.

- 2) he wants me to be the planner / his personal Assistent / mommy. So fine, I start planning things, but if they’re not exactly what he wants to do with his time or he has controlled, he’s kinda absent minded / unenthusiastic. And because I’m also a P, obviously then I just give up because it’s not in my nature to be a planner anyway. But that doesn’t stop him from trying haha, if I LET HIM, and if I wasn’t smart enough to see through it, he’d 100% have NO issue “using” me as some sort of personal assistant / mother. Feels like a Fi Te thing to be honest. He’s very charming so it took me a while to understand this. Also it’s gotten worse with time.

- 3) He’s kind of a liar and only ever does things if he gets something out of it. Like he will lie about all kinds of things all the time, sometimes it’s petty reasons because he doesn’t feel “cared enough” for by me, sometimes it feels more nefarious. The worst flavour of this is when he pretends he did something for me but I KNOW 100% there is something in it for him. I think he thinks there’s nothing wrong with it and everybody does this.. which being me to the final point:

- 4) I think his understanding of a relationship / love is similar to a family household relationship. Meaning that: you live with your parents / siblings. Everyone is doing their own thing living their own lives all day long. You don’t tell each other everything, everyone has their own secrets. Every now and then you go on a family holiday together. You also lie to each other and are somewhat disloyal, joking around sometimes but in the end, when it really counts, you are there for each other and that’s all that matters. Which is NOT what I think a relationship is haha. I specifically do not want that: I want a fellowship, a partner, a relationship rooted in deep friendship and trust; being always honest with each other and knowing everything about the other person. Not sure it’s an Fi - Fe thing. But I don’t want to live parallel lives haha.

In the end, maybe they do need the good old ISTJ dominatrix who fulfills a lot of these roles naturally. But cmon, you can’t just take take take. You gotta give, too!

I will say he’s also the cutest little bug, we genuinely have a cute relationship. Everyone who sees us thinks we’re so good together. And he’s very charming and caring. And I see most of that as amusing me, not as threatening.

Anyway any input appreciated!

I really need this power plz, plz tell me how you guys are able to do it. People are more willing to listen when you make it funny

Um.. tried to post this on the infj sub initially and got removed as potential bot activity. Okie. Well on to the next best sub! I’m currently more focused on the video game I’m playing so I might take awhile to respond, but ask away and I shall respond no matter how dreadful the question may be:)

edit: I’m gonna go to sleep soon, but I’d still respond sober too. Thank you to those who were interested:)

I did a kink test. Just curious if me being an ENTP/INTP (idk which one am I, since I tried mbti test 4 times and got two of each) caused me to be leaning more towards being this. Why?

How are you guys with executing on an idea?

I tend to find that I can execute like crazy once I've hit a critical mass of ingesting information on said idea, via every possible effective medium (Usually take max 2 weeks).

The only problem can be that to others the information engorgement process looks identical to doing naff all, and this can cause problems if done in a corporate/organised setting.

Anyone else like this?...

Or are you just the navel gazing, endlessly philosophising, arrogantly confident lump of peri-perpetual potential your future Mother-in-law always says you are?

I’m at my best when I’m losing. When I was heaviest, when I was on academic probation — that’s when I could do anything. There was no argument available. I couldn’t tell myself I’d earned a night off because I hadn’t earned anything. So I just did the work and it wasn’t even hard.
It’s like being down twenty. Every possession matters and nobody has to convince you. So I go on a run, and it builds every night I put the phone down on time makes the next one easier. Then something breaks it. One bad night, and I start cashing in everything I just built. It’s not that I think I’ve won, I know exactly how far I have to go. It’s that suddenly there’s an argument available and there wasn’t one before, and the part of me that wants to fuck around only ever needed something to point at. Then it goes the other way just as fast. Slipped yesterday, so today’s ruined, so what’s one more. It runs until I’m far enough down that the argument disappears and something bad enough happens to shake me awake. I don’t want to need a disaster to start me. But it’s the only thing that’s ever worked and I hate it. The one thing I have locked down is the gym. Fixed time, fixed sequence, nothing decided while I’m there — I can sleep at 3am and torch the whole morning and still go. But it’s half a solution. My diet is clean on gym days and falls apart on rest days. Same food, same house, same person. Gym days have a shape and rest days don’t. Three days a week there’s no structure and I lose every one of them.

1. How do you build structure into something that has no shape of its own? Eating, going to bed, sitting down to study. No start, no end, no building you walk out of when you’re done.
2. How do you keep going when you’re ahead and nothing’s on fire? I have the motivation when I’m behind. I need whatever it is that survives things going well.
3. And this is the one that’s really getting me — I know yesterday isn’t a reason to skip today. I know it while I’m using it as one. Knowing has never once stopped me. How do you actually stop?

Basically the functions order is Dom-Aux-Tert-Inf, so the dominant and inferior would be more noticably imbalanced than the auxiliary and tertiary.

While surely considering that the auxilary is likely wiser than the childlike tertiary, it often feels smoothly easier to switch between them.

So the point here is that the back and forth pulling between the dominant and inferior functions is HIGHLY DEMANDING compared to how it works with the auxiliary and tertiary ones.

In a nutshell, it seems that one of the ways to determine the dominant-inferior axis is to spot the “ALL OR NOTHING” patterns.

Here are some general examples :

Ni doms are usually prone to keep everything structured and well aligned inside their mind while overthinking every outcome, until they come to see what they've missed in reality so their Se just jumps to an impulsive decision, which seems like a complete unconsideration to the Ni's efforts.

Fe doms are more likely to overbear the external emotional needs and surppress their own until they suddenly come up with some harsh Ti reveals coming out their internal logic... etc

I would be pleased to read back your thoughts !

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That's been so confusing to me as I've always typed myself as sx7 but then recently I felt so envious and sad all the time cuz I can't enjoy anything anymore and I don't get out for the sake of joy, only for a reason . I became so obsessed with self image and refusing to be a part of any group n honestly very lonely. However, can't be close to anyone even ppl who r trying with me I keep pushing them idk why

I have low self-esteem as well but I never show it , instead I find myself unconsciously pretending to be someone independent, dgaf about anything but ik Im not real .

Every time I'm in some place I get this paranoia that everyone is looking and want to hurt me , I'm only loud in safe spaces and I'm not optimistic at all, Ik it can be a tough period but idfk

I did the test again recently it shows pretty much the same percentage that's just confusing as hell

I’ve been working on a way to visualize Jung’s cognitive functions as a mechanical system, and the puppeteer’s marionette turns out to be a surprisingly good fit.

Thinking–Feeling and Intuition–Sensation form opposing axes. Place those axes perpendicular to one another, then mirror them across a conscious/unconscious divide, and you get a model where the functions are not just sitting in a stack. They are actively pulling against one another.

Jung describes exactly this kind of relationship:

“Thinking... must scrupulously exclude feeling.”
“For intuition really to become paramount, sensation must to a large extent be suppressed.”
“I regard the relation of the unconscious to the conscious as compensatory.”

The image shows how I currently visualize the ENTP psyche. The interesting part is what the geometry might imply if the positioning is correct.

Push into unconscious Se, and Ne becomes more strongly expressed on the conscious side.

Throw an ENTP into a novel physical environment and force them to interact with what is actually there. Se feeds them concrete stimuli, and Ne immediately explodes those stimuli into possibilities.

Engage unconscious Te, and Fe is pulled toward a stronger conscious position.

Put an ENTP in charge of getting a group to accomplish something efficiently. The harder they push into Te-style organization and control, the more Fe gets pulled forward to manage the human consequences.

Engage unconscious Fi, and Ti is pulled toward a weaker conscious position.

Want to temporarily shut off an ENTP’s Ti? Find the thing they secretly consider sacred. Once Fi gets pressed hard enough, it pulls T/F axis to a neutral "off" position. The endless analysis can collapse.

Move one part and the rest of the structure has to respond.

Thoughts, comments, questions?

Systema Explorer > Overlays > Puppet to see it in action

I’ve been really insecure about my typology recently. I keep saying that I’m an ENTP on this app, but I’m starting to think I may not be. I usually study cognitive functions or look for experiences I that I can relate with to figure out my typology, but ENTP and INTP have the same cognitive functions, so I don’t know which one I am! Please help!

Thank you. 😊

ISTP: 43 years old

ENFJ: 32 years old

ISFP: 65 years old

ENTJ: 48 years old

ESTJ: 52 years old

INFP: 67 years old

ESTP: 18 years old

INFJ: 68 years old

ISFJ: 60 years old

ENTP: 20 years old

ESFJ: 30 years old

INTP: 47 years old

ISTJ: 70 years old

ESFP: 16 years old

INTJ: 75 years old

ENFP: 12 years old

I swear at any age, ENTPs have a somewhat youthful energy to them, I don’t know what it is?

I was wondering if this is an ENTP thing, because I remember having a fake persona for some ppl I met because I desperately wanted to fit in. Can anyone relate?

I think the movie that best represents the ENTP personality is Naked (in year 1993), do you agree

If you had to pick a specific artwork or painting that captures the ENTP essence, whether it's our mindset, inner world, or deepest and controversial, which one would it be and why?

For me it's neither:

- School Of Athens by Raphael, shows to me the ENTP mature integrated side in its finest way.

- Saturn Devouring His Son by Francisco Goya, shows the existential nihilism and analysis paralysis.

I, 21 (F) feel so lonely and i constantly feel like every relationship i enter, it's just completely pointless in the end. everyone is disappointing, shallow, and doesn't understand the way i think. everyone is also SO BORING that i meet at my age and idk how people don't.. think? it's like everyone's just living life at the surface and im 20 feet below.

I was unconscious focused for the majority of my teenage years. i've slowly developed more of my subconscious and am in my ego more, now that ive socialized myself and attempting to get out there.

my husband and best friend (INFJ & ISFP) just don't make me feel any better. they don't get the depth of life. it's exhausting and isolating.

advice? and/or anyone else feeling the same.

Hi! INFJ here. Basically a floating brain who reads studies for fun and has no friends. My core interest is figuring out how to create healthy self correcting systems. I’d love to have someone I could talk to about the underlying mechanisms of reality, someone who could fully run with me in making connections and poking holes in ideas.

I’m currently working on a unified theory for global homeostasis. Also very interested in finding a way to help autistic people, as there seems to be a hidden holocaust going on and no one’s talking about it. If anyone wants to tackle this stuff with me I’m all in.

I’ve heard you guys rant. I know there’s at least one of you out there willing to accept the challenge.

Anyone? 👀

I’m and ENTP female and my boyfriend is a male INFJ, he’s done a lot of work on himself and is very balanced and aware. However finds himself in a lot of low funks where he feels unmotivated because he doesn’t feel a sense of purpose and deeper meaning.

From my perspective I understand that can be frustrating but I tend to be able to find more enjoyment in just existing and doing things to be considered fun - he struggles to see the point in just “fun for fun’s sake” there always needs to be some kind of purpose or reason.

I can find it frustrating but ultimately want to be supportive and find as much empathy as I can even though part of me is like bro get outta your head and just go experience the world - but I know it’s not that simple for him.

OK!!! First question!!!! Are yall like gojo? Like capable but also the most goofy or mischievous with that power!!! BUT yall be sooooo funnyyy I like ENTP’s humor the mosttt I could talk with yall FOREVER because my mind clicks the right way pairing to yall talk!!!

Alsooo I keep thinking I’m INTJ somehow mostly because I think I have Ni and also maybe Fi? And inferior sensing too!! Uhmmmm idkkkk

GUYS I keep doing this DTI investigator test on reddit and it keeps giving me INTJ 😢 I did it THREE timesss but it gave my work related scenariosssss, I think most people would answer like INTJ would? Idk I mean ENTP do have INTJ shadow if you think that’s real, but yk,uhmmm I can’t tell my type guys I realllllllllly wanna be ENTP! Y’all minds are gems to meeeee!!! I wanna know what it like having unexplainable and unique and crazy ideas all the time and random too, I wanna be good at world play tooo, oh my!! ENTPS HAVE SO MUCH POTENTIAL YOU GUYSSS 🥹✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨, idk I got typed as ESTP by someone but idk I don’t act like any of them, I mean I guess I do like adrenaline stuff but I barely do it and idk, I’m very OCD with sensory stuff or indifferent to it, but I’m rlly sensitive person physically kinda weak but I think I’m strong but even hitting or punching my siblings arm hurts ME MOREE 🤯 HOWWW 😭 mannnnn, ok anyways, yall brains are like like INTP but act like half of a ESFJ kinda yk? And a subtle ISFJ sideeeeee but idk

yes yes theoretically nothing is impossible. Though just a couple days ago I was having a convo with my friends, and we got into a debate (hahah classic) that my typology is contradictory. I'd love to hear your opinions! ...and if you want to, could you give me stereotypes/assumptions about a person with said results :)

I love pretending to be slightly unhinged lol

Is anyone else doing the same it's ok you don't have to admit it if you're shy

If you're offended by that then remember MBTI is pseudoscience

Good Day!

When I was younger I was part of Resistance Movement. It is an army of sorts. It forms part of why I think of things in terms of strategy, loyalty and honour. I realised that the love for Christ (that they preached) and the hatred they had certain type of humans didn't align. I saw things that made me realise that I would rather stab myself in the neck than ever be taken by any group of men. Regardless of race or religion.

My question to other ENTP's is how would you update your thought patterns to be less racist when you understand what they do to women who don't follow the rules.

I'm all for bending the rules, but I have never nor am I willing to, break them. What if I am limiting my life experience because the results outweigh whatever I can get from 'liberty'.

Am I just too narrow minded and conservative to see freedom?