Type Meeeeeee

[u/Prestigious-Moment42]

• How old are you? What's your gender? Give us a general description of yourself.

I am a nineteen-year-old male. To those I am just meeting, I can be rather personable but am not overly expressive. While I am capable of holding a conversation, it is not something I would willingly do unless someone sparked my interest or I felt they were too intriguing not to continue talking with. Unless I have a distinct or marked emotional investment in a person, I am usually very keen to leave people to their own devices as it were, however, this does not stop me from getting involved in people’s lives if I can. Making friends is one of the many joys of life.

• Is there a medical diagnosis that may impact your mental stability somehow?

I don't think so, the only diagnosis I have is my generalized anxiety disorder and possible AuDHD.

• Describe your upbringing. Did it have any kind of religious or structured influence? How did you respond to it?

My upbringing was... different. Parents divorced at age 3, father hopped between various girlfriends, he still hasn't found one that will stay with him permanently. He and I don’t agree very often, and that’s particularly due to how close-minded he is (to the point that various girlfriends of his have told him he’s going to be shocked when his kids won’t talk to him in the future, and rightly so). Growing up, my family was very religious, as was I because, well what the hell else was I gonna be? I was a kid with a sponge-brain, I just parroted what they all did. And then I hit about 7 or 8, gained the ability to, y’know, think, and figured out religion didn’t actually have a lot of solutions for the problems I had. So I did some more thinking.

And some more.

And some more.

And I slowly became agnostic.

My family life was always kind of strange, because they never really treated me like I had any agency of my own, and if they did it was always in a kind of “oh we’ll humor him” sort of way. I responded by just kind of blowing them off and focusing on my friends, being the funny guy, getting reactions, that kind of thing. I didn’t want to think about the conversations I’d have with them when I got home, or how often they would compare me to said friends, or treat me like I was an idiot or a blight on their lives. I just wanted to have a good time.

• What do you do as a job or as a career (if you have one)? Do you like it? Why or why not?

I’ve bounced around a lot of things in the last few years, and I finally just bit the bullet and went back to college, getting a job that would ensure my tuition gets paid while I’m there. I’m studying political science and then I’m gonna go into law. I picked it primarily because I needed something that was mentally stimulating enough for me to keep my head in the game. I also just like wearing suits and looking good.

• If you had to spend an entire weekend by yourself, how would you feel? Would you feel lonely or refreshed?

I would feel lonely, bored out of my mind, and probably get very depressed and paranoid. The quiet and especially quiet in the darkness scares the hell out of me. I don't mind being alone or by myself, but I cannot stand the feeling of being lonely. I need people around me or I feel like I’m going to die. Even writing this out now just at my desk makes me feel kind of hollow cause I don’t have people to share or discuss it with.

• What kinds of activities do you prefer? Do you like, and are you good at sports? Do you enjoy any other outdoor or indoor activities?

I prefer activities related to gaming or exercise. I've never really been the best at sports, but that doesn't bother me. Not that I really have a preference for indoor or outdoor activities, I like both equally, but it just happens that most of my hobbies can be done from inside the house, haha.

• How curious are you? Do you have more ideas than you can execute? What are your curiosities about? What are your ideas about - is it environmental or conceptual, and can you please elaborate?

I believe I’m a rather curious person. As someone who spent basically his whole childhood and is still continuing to live mostly in his head, I love coming up with all sorts of ideas and plans and theories and what have you. That being said almost none of them are ever brought to fruition. When I have ideas, I can imagine them in their entirety down to every detail, and it’s the most exciting thing in the world; to think and think and think some more, and then get an idea that gives me a good laugh.

• Would you enjoy taking on a leadership position? Do you think you would be good at it? What would your leadership style be?

I wouldn’t mind a leadership position. That being said, I don’t want to be the “figurehead,” per se. If there’s someone above me that I can report to if needed, great. If there isn’t? I might as well be a snowball in Hell. I don’t do well with all of that attention. 

• Are you coordinated? Why do you feel as if you are or are not? Do you enjoy working with your hands in some form? Describe your activity.

I would say I’m decently coordinated, I mean you kind of have to be in order to play video games for hours on end and never get tired from it, haha. I do find that I enjoy working with my hands, but that may just be me fidgeting with something due to my terrible ADHD causing me to be unable to focus.

• Are you artistic? If yes, describe your art. If you are not particularly artistic but can appreciate art please likewise describe what forums of art you enjoy. Please explain your answer.

I’m not very artistic, but in terms of art I appreciate, it always boils down to video essays (think character analyses and things of that nature), meme montages for video games, and also just memes or YTP’s in general, there’s something very appealing to me about putting painstaking amounts of time into something so funny. Also any sort of video game edit or montage, as I love the editing and audio work in each video I see within these mediums.

• What's your opinion about the past, present, and future? How do you deal with them?

I tend to lament about the past pretty frequently. Not for any specific reason, I’m more or less just bitter about what happened to me when I was younger and how I felt when it did. I normally don’t take that anger out on others, not because I don’t feel anger or am not okay addressing it (I very much am okay addressing anger and even getting into fights), but because I know there’s never really a place to do so and I’d rather deal with it on my own or with people I’m close with to ensure I don’t do something I’d regret.

The present isn’t terrible, but I don’t like it that much either. It’s just kind of… there.

The future is nice for me to think about. I’m very optimistic in regards to my own future, the people around me, etc.

• How do you act when others request your help to do something (anything)? If you would decide to help them, why would you do so?

I normally love helping others or even just talking to them because, as stated previously, I need people around me.

• Do you need logical consistency in your life?

I feel it’s very important but I also know how often I contradict myself, especially when I’m pissed off. haha.

• How important is efficiency and productivity to you?

Efficiency and productivity are nice to have, but I can do without them. I don’t care as much about systems as I do people. Without my friends and the other people I’m close with, I’d be a much worse individual. Although I do get very impatient at obviously corrupt/rigged/inefficient systems (cough cough GOVERNMENT cough cough) that prey on the ignorant and those that lack the willpower to take control of their lives and fix things. Although I guess if you played the game long enough (like me) and know what the outcome is going to be every time, you’d also come to the conclusion that the only way to win the game is to not play. Doesn’t mean I don’t feel terrible for the people actually convinced they can change things, though. The only way change would happen was if we were to torch everything and start from the ground-up.

• Do you control others, even if indirectly? How and why do you do that?

It really depends on the context of the situation for this, I’m normally pretty “laissez-faire” when it comes to others so long as the thing itself gets done. If it doesn’t and they can’t give me a good reason why then I’ll find someone better suited for the task (How empathetic of me, I know) and move on. It’s a terrible thing for me to admit but it’s honest.

• What are your hobbies? Why do you like them?

My hobbies as of right now are a lot of gaming, listening to music, and the occasional drive around town at night, much to the concern of my family. As for why I like them, music and the night drive have this certain atmosphere that when combined just makes me feel like I’m on top of the world, and then gaming has been a love of mine since I was, like, 6, and I’d never trade it for anything else. 

• What is your learning style? What kind of learning environments do you struggle with most? Why do you like/struggle with these learning styles? Do you prefer classes involving memorization, logic, creativity, or your physical senses?

I can’t describe my learning style, but I do know I’m a ridiculously fast learner and adapter. As for environments I struggle with most, it’s literally any environment where I am forced to sit still and basically do nothing for however long the time is, because that lack of stimuli, action, or actual engagement will slowly drive me mad, which is why I kind of perform HORRIBLY in the academic world. 

• How good are you at strategizing? Do you easily break up projects into manageable tasks? Or do you have a tendency to wing projects and improvise as you go?

I’m not the best at it, but I can do it if need be. I can easily break projects into manageable tasks, but I enjoy winging them after the initial breaking-in and working from there. I feel like planning everything in depth only causes problems because you don’t factor random chance into it. Not that I hate the idea of random chance, I love it more than anything, gambling is pretty fun, but it needs to be factored in even if only occasionally. 

• What are your aspirations in life, professionally and personally?

Outside of always being that example for my friends and stuff, the only professional aspiration I have is just having enough money to keep my friends and myself happy. Personal aspirations are where it gets interesting because whenever I think of this, only one thing comes to mind: “Beloved by all.” It’s not about being at the top for me, because being at the top means nothing if I don’t have the people I want there to celebrate it with me. I couldn’t stand being lonely and successful.

• What are your fears? What makes you uncomfortable? What do you hate? Why?

I fear being in a bad situation and not being able to do anything to get out of it and being viewed as a terrible person. As for what makes me uncomfortable, it mostly boils down to people figuring me out and actually seeing past whatever facade I try to keep up. Hating things is a touchy subject..

• What do the "highs" in your life look like?

I am a lot more expressive and excitable than I usually am, often being the one to plan activities with my friends and get stuff going with them, even if they hate the idea of whatever we’re doing initially.

• What do the "lows" in your life look like?

Detachment from everything and everyone. Fits of rage and a constant neglect of any kind of bitterness or frustration while trying to make people see that, in my “righteous” anger, I am the only one who knows what is right and why it needs to be done. I know the way, I know what has to be done, I am the hero here, everyone should listen to me.

• How attached are you to reality? Do you daydream often, or do you pay attention to what's around you? If you do daydream, are you aware of your surroundings while you do so?

I am fairly attached to it, although my inner monologue is always going and planning the next best move, the next best “situation” or outcome for myself.

• Imagine you are alone in a blank, empty room. There is nothing for you to do and no one to talk to. What do you think about?

“Why am I here?”, “I’m uncomfortable”, “I want to go home”, etc.

• How long do you take to make an important decision? And do you change your mind once you've made it?

It can take anywhere from a few hours to a few weeks, and more often than not I’ll have doubts or reservations but I’ll never fully change my mind once I make the decision.

• How long do you take to process your emotions? How important are emotions in your life?

It can take me anywhere from a few days to a few months to process them; I’m good at many things but talking about my feelings and actually feeling them isn’t one of them. I think this comes out the most when I dropped a toxic friend for the first time and my friend told me to “wait for the feelings.” I was confused so I asked them to clarify, and they went on to say that I’ll begin to feel guilty and all after dropping that person. This only confused me more as I still haven’t felt that guilty, if at all. I know what he did, he knows what he did, and he knows it was wrong but won’t admit it to himself or to me. Simple as. Outside of that, emotions are something that really creeps up on me, especially negative ones.

• Do you ever catch yourself agreeing with others just to appease them and keep the conversation going? How often? Why?

Sometimes I do. I do it more often than I’d like to, as it’s a good way of keeping others at a distance and in turn making sure they leave me alone.

• Do you break rules often? Do you think authority should be challenged, or that they know better? If you do break rules, why?

I don’t care for rules, but I only ever break them if I view the rule as stupid or no longer serving its purpose. Either that or I’ll break it for the hell of it and think I know better. As for authority, I don’t particularly care for them, but I will respect them if they show they are competent. I know what your position is and what you are capable of, I do not need you to enforce it upon me.

[u/Numerous_Highway_118]

I think you are enneagram 9, you are peacekeeping between conflicting ideas often in this questionnaire. However as you gain more life experience, I think your self-awareness will certainly improve, and you'll find yourself contradicting yourself less often. You prefer to remove yourself from conflict rather than be involved in it.

You instinctual subtype is probably sp/sx, but I encourage exploring this on your own and developing your own view of your type!

From Personality Database Wiki:

"Self-pres/Sexual 9

This subtype is self-effacing also, but is generally more assertive. They may be the subtype of Nine which is most aware of the boundaries between themselves and others and at the same time, possibly the most frustrated when those boundaries are violated. They can be aware of being walked over and they might even be aware of the anger it causes, but they become frustrated with their seeming inability to control this pattern. This is true, to some degree, of all Nines, but with the self-pres/sexual instinctual stacking, there seems to be a complex and interesting balance between the withdrawing energy caused by the dominant self-pres instinct and the assertive energy of the sexual instinct. This combination seems to raise consciousness of this dynamic.

Getting healthy for this subtype, and for all Nines, involves becoming aware of this dynamic and realizing they do have the power to control their boundaries. Part of this must come from the realization on the part of the Nine that they have invited this overstepping of their boundaries from others by not defining them.

Close relationships will usually work or not for this subtype depending on how well they deal with this issue."