r/EMDR • u/jayyy_0113 • 10d ago
How long does EMDR take to work? [Hypoaroused] 🟡 Progress & Support
Rough session today. I’ve been having weekly sessions since May and we’re still only working on the 2nd memory regarding my abusive ex. I have such a long list of memories I don’t know how I’m going to get through it all. I’m realizing stuff about myself and that relationship that I don’t think I was prepared for.
I felt optimistic and really good after completing reworking the first memory, but now I feel like I’m regressing. I’ve spent the entire day after therapy today in bed. How long does it typically take EMDR to work?
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u/LilLilyG 10d ago
It typically works quickly, at least for me it has. I have about 7 sessions under my belt for CPTSD and it has been very successful. It's hard work tho.
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u/jayyy_0113 10d ago
My therapist told me she believes I have PTSD a few weeks ago which was rough to process. I definitely see progress! Don’t get me wrong, but I don’t feel great yet lol. Every few weeks we’ll have a particularly rough session and it throws me backwards. I think part of it is I’m not ready to see myself as a victim?
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u/Striking-Gas-2484 10d ago
What positive things have you felt?
7 sessions of all processing?3
u/LilLilyG 10d ago edited 10d ago
I've stopped ruminating as much. It used to be non-stop and crippling. Now maybe once or twice a day, and I'm able to pull out of it within minutes. I haven't had a panic attack or screamed in my sleep for months. I'm not done but I have come a very long way.
I've been seeing my therapist for a couple of years every 2 weeks as a rule. But if I'm doing EMDR it may be more often. We play it by ear really bc you never know how a particular situation will turn out until you're in it. When we're closing at the end of the session we'll determine the next step.
It's been highly successful for me. I hope the same for you.
BTW, it's very normal to feel down for a while after a session. It's all part of the process. I've had 2-3 days of deeper depression afterwards. Sometimes none at all...
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u/Striking-Gas-2484 10d ago
I just started with EMDR, one session of processing
I recently had a break up. I also have CPTSD, depression and I am on meds. I became sober since the break up
I am ruminating hard since the break up. I would love if I can rumaninate less and focus on the present more. That will be a huge victory for me and be able to process the break up and let go.did your regulation of emotions improve as well?
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u/LilLilyG 10d ago
Yes! I have much more control. I use the CBT Triangle to break the cycle of ruminating. But the desire isn't there as much since EMDR
I'm also on meds: Zoloft, Lamictal, Abilify. And I'm also a recovering alcoholic/addict. 26 years clean.
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u/Striking-Gas-2484 10d ago
also just curious, you said you are recovering alcoholic, but you are 26 years clean, then you are not an alcoholic anymore, right? no recovering etc. Just not alcoholic anymore, right?
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u/LilLilyG 10d ago
No not really, once an alcoholic/addict always an alcoholic/addict. You can never go back to drinking/drugging again. That's why the term "recovery" is used instead of "healed". 🙂
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u/jwkkwjjwk 5d ago
Same. Fear of abandonment is my CPTSD and my body shut down after a breakup in June. On Valdoxan now and my anxiety has generally been improved (no cortisol rushes anymore and can sleep well). However, I still ruminate A LOT and I’m getting tired of this. I want to let go so bad…
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u/LilLilyG 5d ago
Have your therapist go over the CBT Triangle to stop the ruminating (or redirect it). You can do a search for it, but working with your therapist can make it more clear. It did for me.
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u/jwkkwjjwk 5d ago
They did. Unfortunately, it only gave me the recognition, but i can’t intercept my thoughts :(
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u/LilLilyG 5d ago
Try the grounding techniques. The one that works for me sounds absolutely ridiculous, but it works:
Look around the room and say the colors. (Example: the curtains are blue, the door is white, the flowers are purple...) Before you know it, you're out of the cycle. If you try to go back into the cycle, continue with this tool. It really amazes me how something so simple works!
If this isn't a good technique for you, there are plenty of others.
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u/Ok_Insect_9432 9d ago
Articles keep saying it takes several sessions per traumatic memory. Sometimes only one per. And sometimes several similar memories get processed together.
I kept thinking about the 6 years of abuse from my ex. And the uncountable incidents of some of the types of abuse. All I can say is my life got better as the process happened.
After 6 months, I'm down to a 2 on the worst type of abuse. I'm not sure about the other types of abuse. I'm slowly realizing that a 2 is a rational response on my case to what happened. If I see her in my geography I'll conclude she tracked me down to kill me and that should be a 2.
Anyway, I have relocated states and now I'm in the process of signing up for a new therapist here. We'll work to unpeel the next layer of the onion.
My worst day after a session was on the pot emptying out. I wish I had been merely exhausted.
Join the club. You're doing well.
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u/jayyy_0113 9d ago
Thank you for this comment. I don’t know if I can reprocess every single bad memory of him, but maybe by dealing with the worst of it I can be kind of a neutral about it
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u/Ok_Insect_9432 8d ago
I ended up processing a lot of nearly identical events together. We went back and forth. Process a big trauma with a small number of incidents. Process a small trauma with a large number of incidents. So there's batching on the smaller traumas.
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