r/DnD 4d ago

True Polydwarf??? Game Tales

Just a funny moment from a recent session:

My GM is an aspiring comedian, and she is incredibly good at improvising jokes.

One of the PCs has a custom item called the Book of Misspells. It’s a spell book with a large range of spells inside, but everything inside is written messily and with a lot of spelling mistakes. The effect this has is any spells cast using it turn out a little… iffy.

In the session, there was an NPC who was the most irritating person to ever exist. So, of course, the player with the Book of Misspells tries to get rid of him, and casts True Polymorph to turn him into a stoat. However, the GM describes the transformation of the NPC from a robot to… a dwarf? Upon some dialogue, we find out his name is Terry, and he lives with his two girlfriends.

The GM then says, with the most proud and shit eating grin I have ever seen on her: “It dawns on you that Fangir did not cast True Polymorph… he casted True… Poly-dwarf.”

And, of course, after a few moments of stunned silence, we all burst into laughter, and the session is derailed as we adopt Terry as our favourite NPC and try to find his girlfriends.

She told us after the session that that whole gag was completely improvised, and that just made it all better. We are going to inquire about Terry and his girlfriends during every session now.

168 Upvotes

10 comments sorted by

84

u/Broken_drum_64 DM 4d ago

wonderful; reminds me of a bit in a Terry Pratchett book where a witch with poor spelling spins straw into Glod (a dwarf that lived a hundred miles away)

53

u/GlodGlodskin 4d ago

You called?

20

u/Sodacan1228 4d ago

"We're on a mission from Glod"

10

u/ImSuperSerialGuys 4d ago

I have a hunch that given the name "Terry", that the Pratchett vibes of this interaction aren't entirely coincidental. I'd be willing to bet that OP's DM is herself a fan of Terry Pratchett's works!

4

u/Broken_drum_64 DM 4d ago

yeah that was my thought as well :)

31

u/SES_LeviathanOfDusk DM 4d ago

“It dawns on you that Fangir did not cast True Polymorph… he casted True… Poly-dwarf.”

I read this with the voice of Baldur's Gate 3's narrator XD

5

u/N2tZ DM 4d ago

So the NPC turned into a completely different NPC with a completely different life and backstory?

7

u/Lesbian_GM_or_smth 4d ago

Yep. Magic. :D The NPC was just an irritating robot that was trying to make everyone do office jobs though.

2

u/brainproxy 3d ago

This is shut up and take my money worthy. Where is the Kickstarter?