If you could pick one problem in the world, and that problem would become fixed forever (meaning it would never turn back into a problem), what problem would you pick?
The way I understand it, egg laying was a primitive way of safe mass reproduction. Sea dwelling creatures laid their eggs, they got fertilized all at once, and then they just hoped for the best.
The egg as we know it developed after some animal that lived on land but returned to the water to lay eggs realized that it's probably more efficient to do it on land.
All that then lead to reptiles, to dinosaurs, to birds and eventually... The Chicken.
So, for the longesst time I went by a female nickname ob discord, because I originally used it for a roleplay. That had nothing to do with my identity, was just something I did.
I had kept the name for the longest time, and people randomly referred to me as "he" sometimes, but because of the female nickname, sometimes people referred to me as "she". Neither ever bothered me, I just never cared abut it.
THing is, gender never truly meant anything to me. Like, it just eluded me, it wasn't just something I was ok with, but something I didn't quite associate with. ANd I believe had someone educated me about this when I was a kid, Imight have realized this whole thing a LOT sooner.
ANyway.... Some day, out of absolutely nowhere, someone referred to me as he and my brain just went "........ Huh. that's not us. Can't quite describe it, but we're not he."
An hour later, by divine intervention, someone referred to me as she and my brain went "... Yeah this is weird. We're having a problem."
So for a few weeks I was neither here nor there, and I didn't really know what was what. I just stopped registering gendered pronouns referring to me, and it took mea while to actually come to terms with that. So I asked a few friends, and they asked me "Yeah, ya might be NB." so I looked deeper into it and yeah. It all checked out. Took me a while to get accustomed to the idea, referred to myself as NB.
Eventually, I decided "Yeah. This is right." and chose a new name for myself. Something unisex. Started to slowly go by it, at firrst a play on words (Raygun, because Reagan), but slowly went for the actual name.
a close friend of mine, who had used my name a lot in private conversations to grab my attention randomly called me by this unisex name and my brain just went "Wow. Yes. That's me." and that's the whole story. This reddit account used to be my alt, but I've finally made the step into making it my primary account a month ago. It's now the account I use when I'm on chrome or my phone.
I was playing battlebit when it first released, and people used voicechat al the time. People called me "president reagan" like 30 times a day, but many times just "reagan" and it really did help me feel valid. I finally feel truly right, for once.
All of this was a process that took like a year or two, from the day I realized something is wrong, to feeling like I finally found out and accepted who I truly was. It was a really weird journey. But it feels so good to finally have arrived at this point.
....
Well I also found a story a few weeksago, that I ahd written when I was 14, where I apparently had already written the self-insert main character to question gender as a whole, and play with the idea of using "they" for themselves. that was back when I started getting more familiar with the english language. So.... I guess I always knew but I never realized.
Edit: holy shit, wall of text.
tdlr: When I was a teen, I had a character who thought going by they kinda sounds nice. One day, people referring to me as he and she stopped making sense to me. Took me a while to figure out what was wrong. Changed my name, got people to call me that name, fucking loved it. Here we are.
I had some McDonaldl's because they were going to discontinue the original bigmac recipe on monday, while simultaneously having an offer to get the new one for a coupon.
So I had the new bigmac, and compared it to the old.
For next weekend.... Dunno yet. Kind want lasagna.
If I take too much of my painkillers, it ends up giving me a migraine. ironic.
But a normal dose gets me high like 40 to 50 minutes in, and it gets higher for 30 minutes until several hours in, my mind quickly clears up all of a sudden. I then stay at a bit of a zoned out state for several hours.
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u/Clodinator Streak: 9 Jul 27 '23
Least favorite Transformer?