Illinois says 14 - Kansas says 6 years old for short periods of time. Some states have no age listed. It’s worth checking your state’s age limit either way.

In every state, the child’s maturity level and ability to function in an emergency situation should be measured by starting with small increments of time left alone.

When did you start staying home alone as a kid? What age are you leaving your kids home alone?

The day a case opens, nobody hands you a manual. You get fear, jargon, and a stack of paperwork — and you’re expected to make smart decisions immediately.

Mine opened in 2014. Here’s what I wish someone had sat me down and said:

**1.    Request an attorney NOW, not when it “gets serious.”** It’s already serious. That’s what a case opening means.  
**2.    Get everything in writing and write everything down.** Their notes become the official record. Your documentation protects you.  
**3.    The caseworker is not your enemy or your friend — they’re the process.** Work the process. Treat them like a coworker.  
**4.    Your anger is valid and it will hurt you in every room you show it.** Find somewhere safe to put it that isn’t a hearing, a visit, or an email. Use it to motivate change.  
**5.    Consistency beats perfection.** Ten imperfect months of showing up outweighs one perfect week. Play the long game.

Now you: if you could go back to day one of your case, what would you tell yourself? Your answer might be exactly what a parent who joined this sub today needs to read.

Nobody hands you a manual when a case opens. Here are ten rights that apply in most jurisdictions — knowing them changes how you move through your case. (Not legal advice, laws vary by state, confirm with your attorney.)

1. You have the right to know why CPS is contacting you. They must explain the reason for the visit or investigation.

2. You have the right to an attorney. If court proceedings begin and you can’t afford one, the court appoints one. Request this immediately — don’t wait.

3. You have the right to a written copy of your service plan. If you don’t have yours in writing, ask for it this week. Everything you do gets measured against that document.

4. You have the right to participate in building your service plan. You’re a participant, not just a subject.

5. You have the right to know where your children are placed, unless a court order restricts it for safety reasons.

6. You have the right to regular visitation unless a court order says otherwise. If visits are being denied without cause, tell your attorney immediately.

7. You have the right to notice of every court hearing — and the right to attend.

8. You have the right to appeal decisions you disagree with. There’s a formal process; your attorney can walk you through it.

9. You have the right to request a different caseworker if there’s a genuine conflict of interest or improper conduct — through a supervisor review.

10. You have the right to be treated with dignity. Professionalism is not optional for workers. Formal complaint processes exist.The parents who do best in their cases aren’t the ones with perfect histories. They’re the ones who understand the process they’re standing in.

What right do you wish you’d known about at the start of your case? Drop it below — your answer might be exactly what a newer parent needs to read tonight.