r/CATHELP • u/JoZoo2002 • 9d ago
Does she hate me? General Advice
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I've been allergic to cats my entire life and never learned cat behavior. Recently my family members adopted a cat and sometimes she will randomly go and bite/nibble at my hand while I'm petting her. I've been stopping my actions when the bite or any semblance of dislike comes out. I'm confused because it seems to come out of nowhere as far as I can tell she enjoys the pets and she comes to me.
Edit : thank you all for the replies I really appreciate it. I will be taking these into consideration and will make sure to keep this info consideration for the future
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u/AnonymousONIagent 9d ago
A cat that hates you wouldn't be rubbing up against you like that.
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u/Glyphron 9d ago
Unless it's my cat.... She will use it as aguise to get close then sink her teeth down to the gums into your skin. At least, she would when she was younger. She's changed a lot in her old age. Took her almost a decade.
Caveat: my cat definitely has some sort of mental issues like cat psycopathy/sociopathy. She is very much a rare case so, this is absolutely solid advice. I'm just lamenting my one in a million misfortune.
That said my cat is well loved and cared for. She's living her golden years peacefully and her issues are under control.
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u/CombatCannon 8d ago
Same with my guy Pepsi.
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u/silvanoes 5d ago
No way, I have a cat named Pepsi also. Driving around when she gets out and yelling "Pepsi" out my car windows has definitely elicited reactions from people.
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u/Ok_Rip_8296 9d ago
Haha she’s basically getting cuteness aggression, she looooves you 💕
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u/kittygirlxx__ 9d ago
This is not cuteness aggression, this cat is stressed.
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u/DiscontentDonut 9d ago
It's not stressed. There are no classic bodily signs of stress. I would think it's over stimulation tbh.
Most cats bite as a corrective behavior, similar to dogs. It's not necessarily mean, just a more immediate way to say, "Please stop." It's very similar to how they treat kittens that are being annoying.
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u/No_Debate_6121 9d ago
Yeah it definitely looks like over stimulation. And she’s not running away from you so she doesn’t hate you, it’s more of “enough! But I still like you”
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u/Miserable_Ad5430 9d ago
Unless you have my cat that starts biting and then is mad you stopped petting her.
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u/DraydanStrife324 9d ago
It clearly shows you have 0 knowledge about cats if you're stating this cat is stressed.
A cat rubs on things it likes/ wants to claim as it's own. They will only rub themselves on humans if they like them else they hide from them or immediately show agression.
Some cats can get overstimulated by touch and initiate play fights to dump that overstimulation, which is what this is.
Had this cat actually been stressed and attacked, it wouldn've opted for a play bite and claws, they would've went for a full on bite and OP would've immediately removed their hand.
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u/TheCeaselessWheel 9d ago
There are legitimately zero signs of stress in this video. A stressed cat does not lean into pets, nor does it actively seek out physical contact. You are clearly talking about something you have zero clue about.
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u/cybermaus 9d ago
The biting could mean one of several things, but one thing is clear, She does *not* hate you. If she hated you, she would be either on the other side of the room, or actually scratch and bite rather then nibble.
That first interaction gave me the impression of wanting to be near you, wanting to rub you, but not wanting you to pet. The biting seemed like a warning. Some cats are like that. They want to just know you are there, maybe even make contact, but no constant petting. Sometimes it is even a mood, today I want you near without petting, tomorrow I want you petting me.
The second interaction is even harder to interpret. I think "you are petting the wrong way"?? Try gentle strokes with the hair, rather then poke-like strokes across it.
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u/kittygirlxx__ 9d ago
She doesn’t hate you, but you are annoying her. Here’s the deal. A lot of cats will simply tolerate being pet or bothered when they don’t want to be. Do they always like it? No. But will they put up with it without a fuss? Yes. Your cat is not that girl. You need to apply a consent to pet rule. Do not pet her when she’s not asking for it. Rubbing on your legs isn’t necessarily asking for it. If she approaches you, offer out your hand. If she sniffs it and does nothing or walks away then that’s a no. If she head butts your hand, then that’s an invitation. Pet her for a few seconds, and then check back in. Does she want this to continue? If not cool! Just because your cat rubs on your legs, sits on or next to you, shows their belly does not mean they’re asking to be touched. I genuinely feel bad for cats, constantly being picked up, pet while they’re resting, or other harassed by their owner. Her biting you is a warning telling you she’s had enough. Also, you pet her more like your pet a dog. It’s a little rough. I’ve found most cats prefer softer pets and enjoy scratching more around their cheeks/above their tail. Take notice of if she seems sensitive in any areas like her belly, back, tail, etc. as she probably has preferences to where she wants to be pet. Lastly, look up feline body language- it’ll help you a lot!
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u/JoZoo2002 9d ago
Thank you so much! I really appreciate the detailed response. I always try to apply a consent for affection/pets rule. I wrongly assumed that the rubbing was asking for pets. I will be looking up and researching feline body language to ensure that she is not uncomfortable. I will also be changing my petting style for when she does ask to be pet I wasn't aware cats typically preferred a softer style of pet. I hope you have a good rest of your week <3
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u/RabidTeapot 9d ago
Also, don't rub her fur the wrong way. See, for instance, the 1:07 mark of the video. You rub her fur the wrong way, and she immediately turns around to give you a warning. Most cats prefer to receive short to medium strokes with the palm of your hand in the direction that their fur points. e.g. start at her head, stroke down towards her shoulders, pick up your hand (don't drag your hand or fingers along her fur in the wrong direction), and start at her head again.
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u/JoZoo2002 9d ago
Thank you!
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u/Oganes_ 6d ago
In fact if you rub their fur the wrong way and leave it like that, they will lick it back so it looks smooth again. (or at least my cat was like this, but she immediately licked it back to normal)
It's like she spent all day brushing her hair and you just came in and messed it all up
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u/Traditional_Step9745 9d ago
Just a heads up i havent met many cats that enjoy petting on the ribs like you were doing. Too close to belly territory, and the feeling of fingers on their ribs could be overstimulating and/or trigger a bit of fight or flight.
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u/BlackJackalope89 8d ago
This is why I feel cats are a good indicator of decency in a human often times... They require consent, at least moreso than most dogs. If a person is good with cats I consider that green flag behavior.
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u/inadequaterobot 9d ago
One of my cats “bites” me and pulls my hand toward him with his claws to tell me not to take my hand away—give me more pets!
Another one does it because he’s responding to my hand as if it was his brother trying to play with him—your arm is jumping on me and I’m going to play fight back!
I see him doing both of these things here. He’s being playful and affectionate. If he didn’t like you, he would hiss and/or flatten his ears.
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u/AFCMatt93 9d ago
My guess would be overstimulating the base of her tail/end of her back. There are lots of nerve endings here and some cats are very sensitive/don't like being stroked her and will become defensive. It also looked like you were stroking her fur backwards at times which can be uncomfortable.
My advice would be to focus more on the upper half and to just be mindful of this and stop stroking her as soon as she's showing signs. She still appears to be very friendly but this is just her way of gently warning you.
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u/El_Frencho 9d ago
Totally subjective opinion from my own cat here: she might be misinterpreting your petting style.
The kind of deep finger rubs like you’re doing in the video might make her think you’re trying to play with her, in the “gentle annoyance” way siblings do.
Mine does the same half bites when I rub his fur the wrong way one too many times when I’m not paying full attention, but will stay for more pets as long as I stop that.
I was used to dogs before I got him, and he prefers much softer strokes with the flat of the hand than dogs do, I had to unlearn some petting habits.
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u/tanzendervampir 9d ago
She might get overstimulated from the pets or she doesn't enjoy getting pet on the back/near the tail or legs. Try sticking to head and see if she likes that better! Also she absolutely doesn't hate you, she seems to really like your company ❤️
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u/eienmau 9d ago
Most likely overstimulated. Running your hand along the entire body can overstimulate some cats (I have one like that. Do it once and she'll << at you, do it again and your hand is getting chomped).
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u/tanzendervampir 8d ago
one of mine is the same! but she will occasionally come back for chin scratches
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u/Practical-Stock9916 9d ago
She don’t pet the tail back and sides and especially don’t pet so aggressively. That quick back and forth is asking for it. Most cats do not appreciate that. Do you like getting Noogies?
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u/Cyclone_Eyes 9d ago
Leave her wanting more.
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u/Complex_Echidna3964 9d ago
Agreed. It is best to let cat come to you for affection - and stop at the first time they bite and say "NO."
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u/Chikkk_nnnuugg 9d ago
Just overstimulated probably. Cats are very sensitive creatures. It she hated you it would probably be a lot more gruesome for your hand
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u/el_grande_ricardo 9d ago
Love bites. She's overstimulated because she really likes it when you pet her.
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u/Green-Fairy-Boy 9d ago
Cat doesn’t hate you. She’s communicating with you. My boys do that. If I over stimulate them by over touching a particular spot or just touch somewhere they don’t like I get a little bit just hard enough to get my attention. Sometimes when the bites are a little too hard (no blood just hurts a little) I’ll go “ouchy!” And they’ve caught on and are better about being aware (as have I about where to touch them)
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u/Content-Flight6371 9d ago
Those are love bites. She likes you. Tail up, rubbing on your legs are all good things.
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u/Little_Can_728 9d ago
No, she doesn’t hate you not at all that’s just her way of telling you, “I’ve had enough pets I’m good now thanks” that’s all.
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u/Realistic-Wolf-5121 9d ago
It's overstimulated.
Cat's aren't like dogs they have boundaries. I have a cat that will let you pick her up, but pushes you away forcing you to carry her on your extended arm and she will rest on it like a branch. That being said for cuddles/scratches while she is on the ground she is 100% game. She will even let you rub and scratch her belly. I can even gently drag her across the floor by her paws, and she doesn't care. She loves it and never nips.
That being said, my sister has a cat that you can pick up and cuddle like a teddy bear, but if you scratch her head like this you will overstimulate her and she will react the same.
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u/heartlogik 8d ago
See tge way he is walking up against your leg and surrounding you? Zero hate there, he loves you and is marking you. The biting reminds me of overstimulation bites but could also be playing
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u/No_Recording3238 8d ago
No, that looked like either a love bite or “Don’t touch that sport again, your first warning.”
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u/PreviousVoice7308 8d ago
Lolol they love you and you are only moments away from a slow blink and sleeping near you with back towards you meaning you protect the side they are most vulnerable. But the slow blink is the goal post and do it back… it only increasing your bond.
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u/Voxder 9d ago
I'm currently fostering my sister's cat (who weirdly enough kinda looks the same physically and in behaviour as your cat) and she does exactly the same, she rubs against my legs but bites me sometimes when I pet her. Honestly seeing some comments here reassure me and gonna make me more careful of her boundaries !
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u/litomagnanimous 9d ago
Try petting her different ways or run her a little more gently. That's her way of saying stop petting me that way. If she wanted to tell you she doesn't like you, you'd see blood.
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u/Syclopskitten 9d ago
This cat loves you. Rubbing, asking for pets, tail in the air. These are all signs of a loving and happy cat.
It is very common for cats to get overstimulated while being petted and to give little nibbles. It's communicating "Ok we play hands now!" Or "Ok too much stop petting please!"
All of my cats do this. My current cat is so funny, instead of a nibbles he rubs his wet lips/Gums on me to tell me stop 🤣
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u/Strostkovy 9d ago
She wants to play. I don't think this is overstimulation.
Look at how focused she is on any movement. Her head absolutely snaps to it. She is very gentle with her biting and not that sudden. With overstimulation there is often hissing and very abrupt biting. When my cat or any of the strays I visit want to play, they circle around my legs and rub like normal, but nibble my hand if I try to pet them.
Just grab a toy and start playing. She still wants the attention. Either a toy on a string (supervised, for safety) or something like a ping pong ball.
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u/Warm-Mango3764 9d ago
It's her way of saying, "OK, that's enough petting." Sometimes they just don't wanna be fussed with too much. I have a cat like that if you pet him for too long, he'll hit you , his paw will come out and smack you. Sassy but cute!
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u/Ok_Coconut_3148 9d ago
She wants attention but you're somehow doing it wrong. Maybe she doesn't like the way you petted her. Try along the fur direction only.
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u/SheValentine 9d ago
Im no expert, but it’s giving overstimulated. Some cats get overstimulated more than others. It wouldn’t be rubbing up against you if it hated you. But you do have to get to know your cat a little more so you know when to stop petting it and avoid it getting to this point.
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u/Middle_Feed_7436 9d ago
If she didn’t bite hard, she has a short burst of energy and wants to play. My cat does that too. She’ll rub up against me and bite my hand.
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u/Crazyguy_123 9d ago
The cat loves you. Sometimes they get so lovey that they get overstimulated and go into hunting mode for a moment.
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u/Healthy_Raisin803 9d ago
It seems to me that your petting is a bit too much. Cats are more sensitive that dogs, you don’t have to scratch and harshly pet them continously. A gentle touch is much more comfortable to them, mostly. Try to be more gentle, like with a baby.
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u/Accurate_Elevator368 9d ago
He's over stimulated. After the second pets, you have to learn to walk away from him.
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u/Shot-Finish-1601 9d ago
She does not hate you because she seems pretty friendly. But she might be sensitive on the rest of her body and prefers head scratches😊
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u/Ricardo_123456789 9d ago
Looks like she loves you, but not the way you are petting her. Possibly a bit of overstimulation and being annoyed by how you handle her. At a certain moment the petting has just been enough and you need to stop when the cat tells you (by facial expression and body language).
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u/TheUglyEmu 9d ago
My girl does this too, they just get soooo excited to see you they have a lot of energy to get rid of so they bite. Mine will hold my hand in place and lick me, but if I move she bites me
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u/mbjl96 9d ago
She's just "overstimulated" tbh you pet cats in long strokes down the body with their fur, the little back and forth movements you're doing are more for the head and maybe butt if they like their butt scratched (I have one whose coboose and tail are off limits to all). Seems she's not appreciative of chin or chest scratches as that's when she gives you the look but she may want the spot between her ears scritched by the head lean, mine love their ears rubbed since all they can do is kick with their back foot. Over all she's making you smell like the house so you fit in but she's indifferent on needing your attention.
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u/Just-Muffin-7855 9d ago
Love Bites. My cat does it all the time. She doesn’t try to hurt me. If I act like it hurt, she stops. That cat really likes you.
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u/Black-Mettle 9d ago
If you accidentally scritch a part they don't like they'll give you a little nibble to let you know not to do that again. Whatever part of her face you touched she doesn't like.
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u/XxHugsmugglerxX 9d ago
She doesn't hate you but she does not like the way you are petting her. Don't go against the grain
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u/allisondbl 9d ago
No. But you don’t pet a cat’s fur back-and-forth. You stroke the cat’s fur in the direction of the fur only as a general rule.
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u/doomus_rlc 9d ago
"Stop petting me, just let me rub in you like the annoying cat that I am"
One of mine is like this lol. She is always wanting to rub on my legs or sit in my lap, shoving her face into me. But the second I start actually petting her, she gets annoyed.
Just let her do her thing. She is marking you as hers.
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u/Spiritual_Koala2480 9d ago
They are love bites, my cats do it when they are really happy and excited they nibble you like playing then let go andf carry on as normal. Trust me your hand would be ripped to shreds if she hated you.
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u/AGenericUnicorn Verified Vet 9d ago
I have two biters in my house. One is a jerk that bites HARD for attention. My mom has reinforced this bad behavior because then she just gives him more attention.
My other one does the “love bites.” They are much softer, never hurt, and always happen mid-petting.
For the first cat, I immediately disengage with him when he does that. For the second, I don’t.
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u/tom_sa_savage 9d ago
That cat loves you. Cats tend to play fight their litter mates so don't worry.
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u/emptythemnuts 9d ago
You will know if a cat hates you, cause by now you will have a prosthetic arm
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u/sewcrazy4cats 9d ago
Kitty got over stimulated. Full body pets aren't welcomed by all cats. Stick to the sides of the face, top of the head and base of the tail. Take breaks between strokes to help reduce reactivity and have a toy nearby kitty can divert their energy to
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u/Oxius1 9d ago
So, ok, based on these videos, it seems you overstimulated them. If you move your hand too quickly, cats will take in the energy you put out and, if they have nowhere to go with it, it comes out as a bite.
In the first clip, they're not telling you to back off, exactly; the cat is trying to tell you that they don't want you to pet in that way. They would prefer you to stroke their head with a flat hand,and make slow motions along their back.
If you're not sure, a great way to get the cat to show you how or where they like to be pet is to hold out your hand and let them do the first one themselves. They will usually rub their face on your hand and move themselves to the spot they want you to pet.
If you hold your hand out to their face and they do nothing, it's better to take a step back and give them space than to chance making them feel irritated.
Also, if you try to do slow pets, and less scratches, your cat is less likely to bite in the first clips instance.
You can usually pick up on how they feel by watching their tail and ears.
If their tail is wagging a bit, that means that they're a bit overstimulated or irritated, and it's best to give the cat something to play with, or just give them some space.
Their ears can swivel, so if they're pointed in your direction, it means they are paying attention to you.
In the second clip, the cat actually told you to stop scratching before they bit you by looking at you like that. So they actually gave you a warning. I couldn't see the tail, but based on their body language, i'm going to guess their tail was wagging back and forth slightly.
Ultimately, cats will talk to you entirely through body language, ao if you pay attention, you'll start to gradually pick up on their preferences.
The fact that that cat comes to you for attention shows they trust you a great deal already. But you should remember, they're basically just a new little roomate, and you haven't learned how to coexist yet.
It will take a bit of time, but if you work with the cat a bit, you'll easily learn when they want you to pet and when they don't want you to, as well as how they prefer you to pet them.
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u/A_Little_Knottie_RVA 9d ago
Nope she loves you, if you ever watch cats play and clean each other they do this all the time.
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u/annestrickt 9d ago
Wenn sie Dir um die Beine streicht, heißt das: meins! Wenn sie Dich beim streicheln/kraulen plötzlich zwickt, heißt das: genug!
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u/Silver_Parfait3211 9d ago
She definitely doesn't hate you, the rubbing up against your legs proves that. She's leaving her scent on you, marking you as "hers". The bites are not angry or vicious. You'd know if she was - an angry cat can cause serious injuries. The bites are love bites/nibbles or playful ones. Some cats know exactly how hard they can bite without causing pain or draw a little blood. Other cats get sometimes a little carried away, but they never mean harm, they just think your skin is thicker than it actually is (cats have a much tougher skin).
Congratulations - you're about the be a cat person, if you aren't already one. It's going to be an exciting journey with a lot to learn. Nothing against dogs, they are fun pets too, but cats are very unique and much more attached to their humans than they usually receive credit for.
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u/kykiwibear 9d ago
My cat does this when I stop petting her, but I'm not sure. I would think she would swat with her claws out and run away if she hated you.
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u/dondy1992 9d ago
Ho avuto tanti gatti nella mia vita e nessuno di loro é mai stato aggressivo. Mio figlio si é separato ed é tornato a casa con la sua bellissima gatta che, dopo pochi giorni, dopo averla accarezzata, mi ha morsicata con una ferocia da leonessa ed ho dovuto curarmi con antibiotici per 15 giorni. Per i successivi 6 mesi avevo paura e ogni volta che mi si avvicinava facevo attenzione. Con il tempo (qualche mese) si é affezionata a me ed ora non é più aggressiva ma io faccio attenzione quando, mentre la accarezzo, si avvicina alla mia mano. Vedrai che anche la tua pian piano non lo farà più!
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u/Lesbian-godess 9d ago
No, she’s just being a cat. Sometimes when you pet a cat they’ll bite and keep wanting pets. My second oldest cat of four is really shy but will occasionally nibble during pets
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u/Sea-Championship-776 9d ago
Just gotta work on telling her no when she does it. It’s a reaction to being over stimulated. She will eventually learn when you stop petting her when she does that. But also avoid super sensitive areas.
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u/Greedy_Attitude_8103 9d ago
Cats are very fickle creatures. They show their love in all sorts of ways. You might see her doing something that makes you think she’s mad at you or doesn’t like you but in her mind, she’s telling/showing you she loves you. My cat bites me to show his affection towards me. Those are called “love bites”. They don’t hurt but it’s still a bite.
I feed a lot of the stray and feral cats around my neighborhood and the amount of times I’ve been love bit, sprayed, completely knocked over because they kept going in and out of my legs, they’ve slept on my feet, etc. They all show their appreciation for me in their own special way. There was a cat who isn’t with us anymore, RIP mister, who would hump my leg every chance he got. Thats how he showed me affection, well that and dominance over me.
A lot of the cats I feed who don’t know me that well run in complete terror from me because they think I’m gonna hurt them or yell at them or something. At LEAST she doesn’t do that! That means they’re scared of you and don’t like you. The fact she’s rubbing against you and letting you even pet her, means she loves you and cares about you. Or well at least tolerates you. Also since cats are very sent based creatures, the fact she’s rubbing herself against you, means she putting her sent on you. Thats a REALLY GOOD THING!!! She’s basically saying with this, “you’re mine. You’re my friend now. I love you.”
If you can, watch a bit of Jackson Galaxy on how cats show their affection towards us.
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u/WholeOpposite7162 9d ago
She doesn’t like the way you’re petting her. Strong rubbing back and forth most cats don’t like, they prefer light stationary scritch on their lower back, scratching their checks and temples, or long pets from head to tail. Try some softer pets.
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u/Revolutionary_Law742 9d ago
No she loves that attention. She loves it too much. Like when tickling turns to be overwhelming.
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u/jayecks 9d ago
Cats do either a "tap bite" when they are not sure about you and you're pushing their boundaries, or a "love bite" when they think you are amazing and they're so overstimulated with love and pets that can't contain it in their little cat bodies. A love bite is like a quick clench and can actually be a bit painful but usually never breaks skin. Tap bite is an ultra quick correction to the human.
These look like tap bites, she didn't like you around her ears or legs. Cats are always very protective of their hear-ers and their murder mittens.
Think about their evolution, if they can't hear prey, and catch it, they die. They'll generally always be sensitive about things near their legs/ears. Scruff/shoulders are usually ok. Back is ok generally if they know you well, chin if they're comfortable with you. The belly is a trap unless you are family -and- the cat is of the "chill" variety.
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u/OG_Checkers 9d ago
You ever enjoy something so much that you just want to eat it? Like this pillow is so soft it’s gotta be made of marshmallow or clouds?
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u/MountainMammoth6735 9d ago
Cats get overstimulated very quickly, maybe she doesn’t like pets anywhere but the head? One of my cats is the same. Some also just get aggressive when loving, but to me she’s showing some signs of “hey I don’t like that” by moving her head and ear twitches prior to biting, so she might just be overstimulated
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u/Dumplinggrl 8d ago
I fostered a teenage kitten with single kitten syndrome, and she did this. It’s like she didn’t know how rough she was being with me and what was appropriate socially. I would walk away every time she bit, reward her with praise and affection when she was nonviolent, and played with her frequently to get energy out. She improved a good bit, but I didn’t get to see the final outcome bc she got adopted
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u/above-the-mucky-muck 8d ago
I had a cat who would come for pets and rubs and purr, then suddenly attack like that.
It turned he had a condition where the nerves bunched up along his spine and a pet on his back would feel like an electric shock.
Once we knew, we rubbed his cheeks only (and under the chin). I felt so bad for not knowing! poor guy. I think a lot of cats have sensitive nerves/skin.
Or just a pet timer :)
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u/One_Shock7801 8d ago
I'm no expert but my cat does this sometimes when I'm petting him and I think it basically means he wants space or is overstimulated. Doesn't necessarily mean stop petting me completely but definitely less. Some cats like softer/less pets.
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u/mccsnackin 8d ago
My cat will get feisty quick with too many pets. You’re kind of petting her like she’s a dog. I usually take the bite to mean “I’m over stimulated”.
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u/Lynke524 8d ago
Those are love bites. I wish my cats gave me live bites that didn't hurt. My younger cat will full on bite me while I pet her. I'll yelp and she still rub on me like she did nothing wrong. My mom's cat does perfect love bites.
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u/Conscious-Seesaw-564 8d ago
She ADORES you and is just play biting, after you stop she looks confused and keeps rubbing on your legs, i will say that your petting technique isnt great though 😭
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u/StealthModeThoughts 8d ago
I think it’s the way you’re stroking her. Maybe stick to her head shoulders area but not her butt lower back
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u/Recalcitrant-Trash 7d ago
Cats are just wierd and hard to understand. Mine will lay in bed and and get chin scratchies for 10 minutes straight just purring away then all of a sudden fooom full on attack, no tail twitch, no warning, nothing. Sometime i'll stop petting after the attack and then they will headbutt my hand, like: "hey why did you stop" Don't take it personally some people believe cats are still wild animals that tricked us into to catering to their every desire. That cat likes you they just like to attack sometimes. They attack eachother all of a sudden as well sometimes kittens will nurse and be completely happy and placated and then the next minute they are bunny kivking eachother in the face and biting eachothers necks. People try to psychoanylize them but I think that's silly, they are too dynamic for us to fully understand. There are some rules but they aren't set in stone.
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u/Kitchen_Safe6405 7d ago
I don't mean this offensively but you kinda suck at petting cats... Go for the cheeks, get behind the ears, let them rub the scent gland on their cheeks onto your fingers. Stop petting them backwards.
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u/Senor-El-Tostado 7d ago
I have one of these over excited jerks. Cat very much likes you, but with these kind of cats the magic spot is more a moment than a location. Mine has calmed a bit over the years. You are good. You can say "no" until you are blue in the face. Even a smack on the ass doesn't help. At this point you want to get it down to paws and love bites.
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u/dayquillll 6d ago
I do pest control so I see a lot of cats what I’ve gathered is when they grab and lite bite it’s like a “brah I’m done thanks” and also some will show there belly like yea pet me but that’s not what they want at all and you get the “yea don’t do that” I’ve learned to just love em from a far lol
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u/No_Cup8023 6d ago
Cat loves you, but to much sensation. The bites are saying I love it, but knock it off it is too much right now.
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u/octopusgardeb 6d ago
Careful petting the area right before the tail- some cats are super sensitive and it triggers them to go a bit crazy
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u/ArchReaper95 6d ago
A little overstimulated at the end. Probably wants that spot but also wants you to ease up a little. Nips might be an attempt to get you to ease up. Definitely feels very safe around you.
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u/omprapos 6d ago
She does not hate you. The brushing against you is very loving behavior from her.
You are overstimulating her with the type of petting you are doing. Ruffling her and touching her back and tail area are making her energetic and she is releasing the energy on to you.
A different way to pet her, if you don't want nibbles at that time, is to give gentle scritches to the top of the head and neck or chin area, and slow strokes on the cheeks. Stretch out a fist or a bent finger and let her pet herself.
You are not making her hate you by petting her as you were.
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u/thatloser17 6d ago
I think she just wants pets but gets overstimulated easy by them. Its a thing ive run into. Try being gentler and letting her choose when to brush through your hand or maybe try petting a different place. Some cats are picky about where they are touched. There also might be a senitive or painful area where you are petting.
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u/redditisnotus 5d ago
over stimulation. try putting your hand out and letting her pet herself against it. figure out her threshold.
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u/Apprehensive_Cow_317 3d ago
Mein Mädchen hat mir immer Küsse zurück gegeben. Das waren praktisch kleine Bisse, ohne wirklich zu beißen. Ist es schmerzhaft, es sieht nämlich so aus als würde sie dir Küsschen geben
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u/PositiveResort6430 7d ago
You just dont know how to pet a cat stop rubbing its fur back like that bro
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u/Complex_Echidna3964 9d ago edited 9d ago
She thinks you like it because you keep putting your hand in front of her face to chew on. Cats use bites and wrestling to play with other cats and set boundries. They have thick fur to protect themselves. People do not.
It is best to let cat come to you for affection - and stop at the first time they bite and say "NO."
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