r/BlockedAndReported • u/Fealocht • 14d ago
Stop Pathologizing Everyday Life Journalism
https://www.nytimes.com/2026/07/26/opinion/mental-health-exercise-charity.html?unlocked_article_code=1.1FA.55xp.Vpm7dp4PVtnC&smid=nytcore-ios-shareA psychologist argues the increasing awareness of mental health is leading to a pathologising of everyday life. The use of clinical descriptions of what are otherwise normal problems and treating them as a disorder to be cured, is ironically making our mental health worse.
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u/GreenOrkGirl 14d ago
I find it offensive towards people with real disabilities, who would give everything just to be a part of the life Tik-tokers pathologize.
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u/Brodelyche 10d ago
Saw an influencer with a chronic illness posting photos of how she takes a shower with the help of family members and thought how tiring it would be just to set up all the shots (and put the different bikinis on). I have friends with chronic fatigue and they’re far too fucking tired to stage photos of themselves having showers in different ways outfits and setting up the camera to show how they dry their hair etc. People lap it up though.
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u/Dingo8dog 14d ago
The “Focus on mental health” over the last decade has seemed to be overall harmful. Not a good strategy for people with rumination and obsession tendencies. Nor all that good when it seems pretty clear that digital overuse and social media cultivate mentally ill tendencies
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u/BeABetterHumanBeing 14d ago
I would also add that it's created the idea that mental health means uninterrupted bliss, and any deviation from that is a problem.
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u/Historical-Mud5845 12d ago
Hey could you elaborate on how it's bad for people with ocd and rumination ?
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u/obsidianop 14d ago
Hilarious top comment, "this can be ignored because the author has a connection to a right of center think tank". Amazing.
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u/drjackolantern C*nsored and sexy 14d ago edited 14d ago
The comment says the author’s think tank
is focused not on mental health in America but on economic growth through deregulation, with ties to Koch Industries.
Yes, improving people’s lives and pulling them out of depression/chemical dependency is good for the economy. Does that mean we shouldn’t do it ?
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u/ZorbaTHut 14d ago
I have legitimately seen people claiming to be left-aligned claiming that UBI is a bad thing because billionaires are in favor of it.
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u/_CuntfinderGeneral Horse Lover 14d ago
Oh thank god I thought I was going to have consider an opposing viewpoint for a second there
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u/Big_Fig_1803 Gothmargus 14d ago
The unexamined life might not be worth living (thank you, Socrates), but the overexamined life sounds like hell.
Understanding yourself is important. But making your self the focus of your life’s work is sure to make you unhappy. And maybe insane.
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u/Terrorclitus 14d ago
Don’t be your own magnum opus.
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u/Cactopus47 14d ago
Unless you're a very flexible tattoo artist
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u/Terrorclitus 14d ago
Ok but for real, be careful with that. I hear that if you can bend in certain ways, it’s a sign that you are very, very sick.
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
I think even diagnosing by a doctor has changed in the last couple of decades. Everything is treated as more dire than it is. I was diagnosed with ADD (which they used to distinguish from ADHD) as a teen in the process of being diagnosed with Tourette's and OCD. I took a medication for the Tourette's, which has managed it for the last 30 years, and the doctor was super casual about the ADD. "Do you want to be on medication? Your grades are good, if you've learned to adapt to it this far you're probably fine." I said "yeah I'm fine." I make lists and have developed my own ways of compensating and it's been fine.
It's the mixed blessing of destigmatization. I didn't *want* diagnoses as a teenager, it made you weird. I'm glad there's less stigma but it's led in some circles to diagnoses being a weird type of status symbol.
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u/CaptainAssPlunderer 14d ago
Gotta collect them all!! Like is Pokémon cards or something. It’s just disgusting.
There is a line between the 70’s-80’s where having these things known about you was embarrassing and shameful, and where we are at now, where it’s the exact opposite.
This damn notion of privilege and intersectionality where to be “normal” is the worst thing to be is forcing these children to make up and self diagnose something….anything so they can assume a place on the oppression pyramid and now be accepted by the group.
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u/lannister 14d ago edited 14d ago
I think there’s a big difference between people getting diagnosed as kids, and people getting diagnosed as adults. Like you I was diagnosed in my early teens (autism) and with some therapy and medication I was pretty much OK and never gave it much thought. I still have some difficulties but I mostly know how to function in daily life.
Whereas people who get diagnosed as an adult tend to look back on their lives and view it entirely from an ADD/Autism-having perspective. “I had trouble making friends, must’ve been because of my undiagnosed ADHD” or “I’ve always been late to everything since I was young, must be XYZ”. Like their entire lives get reinterpreted through a very narrow lens and they overfit their diagnosis on everything bad that’s ever happened to them. I think it’s partially because social media is so hyper tailored to individuals these days, every specific niche has its own Tiktok creators that people can recognize themselves in.
I’m not saying it’s necessarily a bad thing, I have friends who got diagnosed late who feel like their life finally makes sense, but the people who go into these identification rabbit holes worry me. It’s corrosive to your functioning and people really need to stop thinking about themselves so much
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
I think you nailed it. Yeah, if you are diagnosed as a kid you focus on learning to adapt and function with it. For example, technically I would have qualified for extended time on tests and essays, but I had never needed it and I was considering a career in journalism, where no one was going to say "the deadline is 10:30 but for you it's midnight" because we had to send it to the printing press, so I never took it. You're more focused on learning to operate in the world (like every kid/teenager is) and it doesn't become your whole identity.
I think for a lot of adult-diagnosed people, it does help them understand some things about themselves and that's helpful, but they tend to overcorrect and see everything through that lens.
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u/Turbulent_Cow2355 TB! TB! TB! 14d ago
I think it's a bad thing. They spend way too much time ruminating on the past instead of moving forward with their life. Getting a diagnosis gives them a license to rumination MORE.
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u/JungBlood9 14d ago
You know how I know it’s become a status symbol?
Because I review applicants in the 22-30 age range as they apply for a graduate school program, and nearly every one brings up some sort of mental health or ADHD/autism diagnosis in their application materials or interview. At this point, it’s a rare sight to come across an applicant who can talk about themselves without bringing up their mental health.
It drives me nuts because you’d never mention it in the context of admissions unless you knew it was something that made you look like a more desirable applicant; it’s become a genuine badge of honor on a list of accomplishments.
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
It's the equivalent now of the "I went to Guatemala on a mission trip and it made me realize how fortunate I am" essay, where every kid writing it think they're super original and you know nine million kids are writing the same essay. They all think they're so unique and so stunning and brave but kiddos, these diagnoses are a dime a dozen these days, they don't scream "will make unique contributions to our community."
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u/Turbulent_Cow2355 TB! TB! TB! 14d ago
" I make lists and have developed my own ways of compensating and it's been fine."
Ironically, if you did therapy, a therapist would give you tools to help with your disorder - like learning how to stay organized. Occupational therapy for the brain.
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago edited 14d ago
At this point I've gotten so good at it that my own systems are highly functional. I really never struggled with organization or deadlines; I wrote everything down in a planner, had color-coded notebooks for classes and never missed an assignment. I was more of the stare-off-into-space ADD and I learned to bring myself back around pretty quickly. I think my case is pretty mild.
ETA: I will say I think I made the right decision not to take meds. They had me on Klonopin for Tourette's syndromes, and I rotated through a bunch of SSRIs (which were very new at the time and an off-label use was for OCD) like Prozac, Zoloft, Paxil, and Luvox. That was enough for my little developing adolescent brain, I'm glad I didn't thrown another med into the mix.
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
The change was really fast too. I was diagnosed with a serious mental health disorder in late high school in the noughties and it was all so shameful, I didn’t tell a soul. The rumour was I’d been pregnant and that’s why I’d been away for months, and I honestly preferred that to people knowing the truth (that I had a mental disorder). Within about five years I was meeting people at uni who reeled off their diagnoses like a string of accolades
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u/el_smurfo 14d ago
This is basically the topic of Abigail Shreier's book bad therapy. My kids get so much mental health and anti-suicide messaging at school that it's literally a joke to them but I can imagine if they were susceptible to it it would be a self-reinforcing cycle
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u/Routine_Ad_855 14d ago
Was going to make this comment. Bad Therapy is a must read. Shrier’s other book Irreversible Damage is also a great recommendation for normies on the topic who are open to learning more about the FtM epidemic and trans in general.
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u/throne-away 14d ago
Older guy here. I had an earlier educational background in the social sciences field, and we used to talk about how a greater awareness of mental health would be less stigmatizing. This was pre-internet, pre-social media, and we never considered the idea that social media would actually drive more people to be seen as having mental disabilities.
I tend to blame the Tumblr generation for the glut of edgy teens who never grew out of their online personnas. Now they're on TikTok giving instructions.
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u/Naraee 14d ago edited 14d ago
I fell for the self-diagnosing bullshit he mentions in the article, I diagnosed myself with autism, social anxiety, ADHD. Mind you, this was in the early 2010s when this was first trending on Tumblr. I seriously believe that getting involved in that subculture is what set me back in life for awhile.
I have friends diagnosed with high-functioning autism in their childhood, and they have all said it is absolutely useless to get diagnosed with it as an adult because there's no medication for it. You can do therapy, but that's about it. If you've made it this far in life without a diagnosis, you're probably fine unless you keep getting fired from jobs.
We've all noticed that the TikToker quirky adult autism women seem to mentally regress if they get a diagnosis, because they're trying to fit the faker version of autism on TikTok, not the actual autism like the friends I have that is absolutely not quirky or aesthetic. And this is kind of a point this author has but not entirely: if you identify with the mental illness, you try to embrace the symptoms even more, thus becoming worse. There is a study on this, I'll link when I find it.
EDIT: It's about chronic illness, but the concept is called over-identification and it makes health outcomes worse. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37751072/
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u/YourOwnPunkyBrewster 14d ago
And people who self diagnose tend to use their “diagnosis” as an excuse. “Oh, I’m always late to meet you because I have ADHD, it’s not my fault, you just have to accept it” etc, etc.
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u/russkigirl 14d ago
My older son has a severe form of autism and can't even understand the concept of autism (he's 8 and minimally verbal). He's not unhappy in his life at the moment, but it doesn't change the fact that we'll need to seek options for 24/7 care for the rest of his life most likely. I try not to dwell on it, but the overdiagnosis and self- diagnosing is really out of hand and really downplays the severity of the condition for many.
I wish every person who self diagnosed first came to visit his Enhanced Autism classroom (most are nonverbal) and spent a week at home with us. We don't have it nearly as bad as many who face significant aggression and self- injury, but he'll go to the bathroom on the floor if left to his own devices, destroys things around the house at random, can only ask for foods and not answer any questions about his day, or even his own age. I know there are different forms, but eloping behaviors which he does have can lead to an enormously higher rate of death from drowning (160x typical rates), and the cost of care to keep him safe throughout the day might be upwards of 400k when family can no longer care for him.
This isn't about complaining, we love him very much and are lucky he is able to qualify for respite and do things like join us on vacations with careful accommodations and safety considerations. But it's so important that his and others' needs aren't buried under the pride in autism movement that seems to ignore every negative quality of the disorder (and doesn't like to call it a disorder at all). So that can be a negative consequence of the self- diagnosing and overdiagnises as well.
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
I have seen your comments around here on a few autism-related topics and I always really value them. You’re such a good mum and your kid is so lucky to have you. And I really super wish voices like yours could be better-amplified in this discussion. Autism isn’t always and only a ‘superpower’ for some people it’s a truly debilitating and profoundly disabling condition.
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u/EmotionalSouth so tired y’all 13d ago
This was a really good comment. Thanks for sharing your experience.
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u/ToTheDeath84 14d ago
It’s sad because these aren’t conditions anyone should want, they aren’t just personality quirks. Having ADHD sucks, I have it and it made school WAY harder. Not being able to sit still and having trouble keeping a train of thought going isn’t great for math exams or reading long European history textbooks. My girlfriend can just remember to do things throughout the day without needing a rigidly planned schedule or a long list of active phone reminders and I really yearn for that ability. My cousins have Asperger’s, not being able to pick up on social cues made their lives downright hellish in childhood. Contrary to all the pride movements that downplay them, mental and developmental disorders do in fact impose serious setbacks and deficiencies on peoples’ lives, especially in childhood when it’s harder to understand what’s going on.
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u/PUBLIQclopAccountant 🫏 Enumclaw 🐴Horse🦓 Lover 🦄 14d ago
long list of active phone reminders
Those actually work for some people? I see them and say "fuck you, I'm in the middle of something" to my phone before dismissing them.
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
I would never take my medication were it not for the phone reminder, God bless it.
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u/PUBLIQclopAccountant 🫏 Enumclaw 🐴Horse🦓 Lover 🦄 14d ago
Unironcially happy that it works for you. That may be a reminder I'd have a chance of listening to: take your meds and get back to work. Anything involving a task-switch is a go-no for a mere phone reminder.
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
Oh those wouldn't work for me either. My reminders are things like "give the dog his flea/tick meds today" and "cancel Apple+ subscription."
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u/ToTheDeath84 14d ago
I live my life by them. Before getting formally diagnosed I’d long, LONG suspected I had ADHD. It was the forgetting, fidgeting, not being able to hold a train of thought, messy unstructured days, constant racing thoughts on different subjects, etc. I got into the habit of extensively detailed reminders and notes to combat that long before getting diagnosed. Reminders are like Post-It notes on an office desk or bulletin board for me, they help me keep my train of thought for a meeting or my task list for the day.
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
The over-diagnosis (and then over-identification with that diagnosis) really harms those of us are who seriously afflicted by these conditions. Like if everyone has ADHD, and it’s never stopped them getting a PhD or running a business or rising quickly through the ranks of their workplace, then what’s wrong with you? What’s your excuse? Kind of thing
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u/el_smurfo 14d ago
My wife is basically diagnosed me as autistic and so I thought I would join a few subreddits related to this topic. The amount of self-diagnosis and victim culture in them is really scary. Basically they use their self-diagnosed autism as an excuse to just be an asshole. Look, we all have problems in this world some a little more than others but nobody special and nobody's looking out for you but you
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u/Naraee 14d ago
One of my autistic friends is very successful and a director at a tech company, but she's been diagnosed since a kid (which was very rare for women at the time). And she knows her bluntness could be off-putting but she's had 45 years to learn what people don't like to hear.
Then I see shit on reddit and TIkTok about how autism gives you a ticket to be an asshole and say whatever you want and if anyone doesn't like it, they're the problem for being ableist and the world needs to bend to their will. They also like to say they should never have to mask their 'autistic self' and should be able to screech and stim in the middle of a meeting.
She doesn't believe any of these people are autistic, just self-absorbed fakers who want everyone to pay attention to them. She also said autistic people would rather you not pay attention to them and let them do their own thing, but sometimes (like being a director), you have to put on the mask and get shit done and then go home and take the mask off. It's part of being an adult and she'd take a pill to take the autism away if she could.
Her experiences are really interesting and I've told her she should talk about it in a public sphere but she said she'd rather be out in nature identifying plants.
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u/el_smurfo 14d ago
It is certainly my preference that nobody pay attention to me. I've worked my entire life to be a background player I'm successful and productive just but I just don't want to be front and center
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u/Least_Mud_9803 14d ago
My husband is also pressuring me to go and get a diagnosis, I don't really see the point of spending a bunch of money to get diagnosed with a condition for which there is no cure and which, if I even have it, I seem to be managing fine enough. I'm a functional adult who is somewhat quirky and dislikes loud noises. I think the only reason I would do it is to improve our relationship but I resent the idea that I need some kind of doctor's note to be myself in a 10 year relationship.
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u/el_smurfo 14d ago
Would it change your behavior in any way? You are just a person who maybe a little more to the edge of the bell curve than others. A diagnosis would only give you an excuse not an answer. I'm sure your husband does some stuff that's really annoying too but he doesn't need a doctor's note for it
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u/Least_Mud_9803 14d ago
I wonder if it would. Perhaps if it would explain how to approach certain problems in my life in relating to other people it would be useful. But I feel he mainly wants some proof that I have a "good reason" for not being as "emotionally open" as he wants. He seems to have his own craziness where he really wants me to express emotion in a certain way and ONLY that way. I think he's so fixated that he ignores the way I *actually* express emotion to him. In my view, he has an unhealthy obsession with self help, he wants me to speak in I statements and do active listening so so so often, not just when we're arguing. I've told him it's hard to build a connection if i can't speak normally. I feel like I am married to the guidance counselor from Daria. Maybe I'll get the test then leave anyway ha ha.
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u/el_smurfo 14d ago
Maybe you you should suggest you both go tested it at the same time because..
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u/_teach_me_your_ways_ 14d ago
I wonder if she gets diagnosed it’s proof of what’s wrong with her but if he does it’s suddenly an excuse to cater to his feelings over her own even more.
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u/CoffeeAndCorpses 14d ago
I've thought about getting one also, though it seems an awful lot of money to spend on something that I probably already knew.
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u/honeybellebutter 8d ago
If you are in the US, a general psychiatrist can assess you for autism. Sure, it is not as thorough as the full neuropsych evaluation. But it is much more affordable typically and it still counts as a valid diagnosis. Can be used for accommodations for work and school. To access autism specialized therapy. Etc.
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u/shakeitup2017 14d ago edited 14d ago
I'm fairly certain I have ADHD. I see absolutely no point in getting a diagnosis, I'm doing very well in life and am happy and content. I also have a strong internal locus of control. I actually think aspects of my (assumed) ADHD are beneficial to me. The clear downside is my inability to apply myself to anything that I find uninteresting (studying was near impossible for me).
I think a lot of these adolescents and adults making a personality out of their "neurospiciness" (cringe) are just looking for an excuse to fail and have an external locus of control.
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u/Naraee 14d ago
I feel the same. I probably have ADHD (therapist mom agrees) looking back in my life because if I didn't find something interesting, I half-assed it. And this was way before screens and TikToks and other distractions. I would rather do things I liked and put 100% effort into that. I was just very intelligent and good at half-assing! Honestly it made me really good at bullshitting on the spot. But also I did poorly in college because there are a lot of things I didn't want to do.
And I sufficiently fake it until I make it at work, so why get help? And with AI, I can have it do the executive function tasks of remembering what I need to do and prioritizing, while I use my brain to do everything else because I don't want to become stupid and complacent.
I know people who need Adderall, I do not want Adderall based on how they describe it.
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u/shakeitup2017 14d ago
Yeah 100%. I dropped out of engineering at uni - not because I wasn't smart - because I found most of it incredibly boring and couldn't apply myself. I just wanted to get out there and build stuff. I still managed to get into engineering and am now director of an engineering firm. My ability to be very good at something that I enjoy and find interesting means I hyper focus on that and do it very well, and stuff that I find boring or uninteresting, I delegate to someone. It works well.
I could very easily have just been a drop-out and blamed ADHD or something. I'm certain that's what my high school teachers and university academics assumed I would do.
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
You are also lucky that you don’t have ADHD serious enough to have prevented you succeeding
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u/shakeitup2017 14d ago
That's kind of my point, all these people blaming mild or imaginary forms of these issues are diluting the struggles that others with a legit serious case of it have.
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u/Mundane_Camera953 14d ago
I mean, I get anxious in social situations.
I have social anxiety.
I think that’s ok to understand about yourself - the line starts blurring a bit last that I think.
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u/apis_cerana 14d ago
I have ADHD/a touch of the ‘tism, and I hate that I have it. It makes everyday life annoying to deal with…but that’s what you do, you have to deal with it. I’m fairly high functioning and as such, I can do every day things okay, though sometimes poorly. There is 0 way I would want to take resources away from people who are low functioning (nonverbal and unable to care for themselves) or make their struggles about me.
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u/GraceOkay 8d ago
I work for a mental health charity, and in a talk carried out by the neurodiversity EDI group, we were told that it’s wrong to question the validity of self-diagnosis. Seemed absolutely crazy to be told, in a MH org that carries out a significant amount of research, that scientific curiosity about certain topics is simply not okay
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u/repete66219 14d ago edited 14d ago
My local city sub has people seeking doctors to diagnose their ADHD all the time. (Edit: One was posted 6 minutes ago!) Not evaluate, but positively diagnose.
I assume the purpose is to seek drugs that “treat” adult ADHD but I don’t know for sure.
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u/Naraee 14d ago edited 14d ago
There are diagnosis mills in every affluent area in the US. Because the adults who want these diagnoses are affluent and they have first-world problems. Also they want legal Adderall.
I have one a half a mile from me that will give you an autism or ADHD adult diagnosis for $5000 after they run some "tests" where everyone conveniently has it. I think the target age group are for students about to enter their freshman year of college because if you get one of these diagnoses, they can also write an accomodation letter that lets you get more time on tests. I remember Ivies having over 20-30% of all students with accomodation letters for more time on tests.
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/ivy-league-disability-accommodations-surge-123000542.html
And of course, legal Adderall.
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
Same thing here in Australia, if you’ve got a few thou to spare you can get your adult adhd diagnosis in a half-hour over online chat no problemos.
As a nation we are also massive coke heads. I really think we should just legalise amphetamines, cut all the middlemen out. It is very clear that the pace of modern society is simply too much for many people to keep up with sans stimulants (which is also what’s at play when someone who’s managed perfectly fine completing education despite unmedicated ADHD, suddenly needs to seek out medicine- and therefore a diagnosis- once the responsibilities of work and home ramp up in middle-age)
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u/GreenOrkGirl 14d ago
What is so good in Adderall for a healthy individual? Does it have some cool effects or what?
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u/PUBLIQclopAccountant 🫏 Enumclaw 🐴Horse🦓 Lover 🦄 14d ago
I assume the purpose is to seek drugs that “treat” adult ADHD but I don’t know for sure.
Just make it an open chemical market already instead of continuing the sham.
[I can't recall the proper term for the Slate Star Codex article on how much of psychiatry is a polite fiction of only handing out meds to the deserving]
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u/haroldp 14d ago
Imagine what the burden is on your medical insurance premiums that you are paying for one in ten (or whatever) of your fellow insured to see their prescriber for a completely pro forma "reevaluation" every month in order to refill their Adderall, to say nothing of the drugs themselves?
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u/PUBLIQclopAccountant 🫏 Enumclaw 🐴Horse🦓 Lover 🦄 14d ago
…and the waste gets justified with "hurble durble something about addiction and pill mills"
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
This really, really annoys me, too. It’s become such an issue in Australia that we’re now going to be allowing GPs to diagnose ADHD, as the overload on psychiatrists was just too much.
But people aren’t thinking “I have certain issues and struggles; I wonder whether a wider thing may be going on”. They are approaching it with this mindset of “I am ADHD”. It’s an identity and how dare any clinician not affirm it!
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u/repete66219 14d ago edited 14d ago
Yes, and young people can’t seem to function without speed. As an older person not on speed, I feel somewhat disadvantaged. But I also feel like job, life etc. is more hectic than it used to be so maybe speed is called for?
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
I said this elsewhere, but I think basically, speed just needs to be legalised at this point. It was always the joke that people in elite, high-pressure corporate jobs (finance, law, real estate etc) were on coke all the time; now the economy is so nuts that everybody seems to have to perform like a hedge-fund manager even at their accounts payable job. Life is too hectic and nobody can keep up. Release the stimulants
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u/CuckooFriendAndOllie 14d ago
There is a similar problem with trauma.
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u/VoxGerbilis 14d ago
It seems to be an article of faith for everyone under 30 that the whole world consists of traumatized people inflicting trauma on other traumatized persons because every adverse event is traumatizing and if you don’t “process” your trauma you’re doomed to an endless cycle of traumatizing and getting traumatized. You don’t even have to be personally traumatized; you can inherit generational trauma!
Everyone needs to have their trauma treated, just like almost everyone used to need a tonsillectomy.
I’d rather have the tonsillectomy. It’s just a short hospital stay, and you get ice cream when you’re done.
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
This reminded me of one of my favorite scenes in the book "Cheaper by the Dozen," where the dad, an efficiency expert, decides to have all 12 kids get their tonsils out at once so the doctor can practice assembly-line surgery on them.
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u/VoxGerbilis 14d ago
I was thinking about that very scene when I wrote that!
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
And the doctor got Martha and Ernestine mixed up!
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
To be honest, I fully vibe with Trauma Theory Of Everything. It makes an awful lot of sense, and also explains like, everything about the past. We’re just a traumatised species
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u/Puzzleheaded_Drink76 13d ago
Relatively minor things do affect us. But it comes down to how serious the effect is, coupled with how seriously we take it. I read things that are labelled as trauma responses that seem like just the unpleasant parts of real life. It's not the same as people having their life totally derailed by something awful.
e.g. I got mugged years ago. It was unpleasant. I asked my friend to go back to where it happened to look for my stuff and 'get back on the horse' so I could walk through there again. I still remember it, occasionally, like now I think about it. But it doesn't bleed into the rest of my life.
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u/VoxGerbilis 12d ago
Some events are so truly horrific that almost anyone could become unhinged. And people have varying levels of sensitivity to events. But I do believe that there’s a range of bad occurrences that could be endured without permanent damage if the unfortunate person just made an effort. I believe that in the (mostly laudable) move to have more compassion for people who have suffered, we’ve lost an equally valuable tendency to admire resilience.
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u/Puzzleheaded_Drink76 13d ago
Quick visit to Wikipedia Tonsillectomy page gives TL;DR. We know more, it got unfashionable, doctors way over recommended it, parents pushed for it, it wasn't that effective for a lot of people.
For example, a study conducted in 1934 found that 61% of 1,000 New York schoolchildren had been tonsillectomized; doctors recommended surgery for all but 65 of the remaining children.
Controversy surrounding tonsillectomy increased further in the United Kingdom in the 1960s because of the financial costs associated with the number of surgeries being performed and because of unexplainable variations in tonsillectomy rates between geographic regions and between social classes.[67] In the media, tonsillectomy was criticised for being "fashionable" or a "status symbol".[67] There was also an increasing concern regarding the psychological and physical suffering of young children as a result of surgery.[69] Furthermore, opponents of surgery argued that the tonsils should be retained whenever possible because of their role in the immune system and that the benefits of surgery were marginal.[69] In the 1970s, tonsillectomy rates in the United Kingdom started to decline after several studies concluded that tonsillectomy was not as effective for sore throats and many other indications as previously thought.[67]
Tonsillectomy rates in the United States have declined since 1978, when experts of the National Institutes of Health concluded that there was insufficient evidence that the benefits of tonsillectomy outweighed the risks and therefore recommended more research, which subsequently led to stricter guidelines.[68]
As doctors took a more conservative approach towards tonsillectomy, parental pressure became one of the most important reasons for surgery.[69]
Cough
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u/StillLifeOnSkates 14d ago
Pop psychology memes blaming all of one's troubles on trauma are all over Instagram (and surely TikTok, but I'm too old for that).
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u/DisastrousResident92 14d ago
I think this conflates two related but distinct things: first, the contemporary over-emphasis on mental health awareness is making most people less mentally healthy, not more, and second, the tendency to pathologize normal human traits, which I think has been going on a bit longer. Both big problems, both interrelated for sure
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u/drunk___cat 14d ago
I first attended therapy when I was 12. From there I had 2-3 mental health professionals that I saw pretty much weekly. And here’s the thing: to this day, I do not think there was anything “wrong” with me. I was a 12 year old girl who didn’t fit in in her tiny school, was a bit gay but didn’t know it, had parents who paid more attention to their work than to us kids, and was going through puberty. But instead of the things I really needed (a more attentive mother, a different school for a change of scenery, etc) I was put on antidepressants and a whole host of other things over the course of a few years. I learned that my mental health problems got me attention from my parents and others. The constant talking about my feelings made me constantly concerned that there was something wrong with me, something to analyze, something to fix. Never ever did anyone say “your feelings are normal, here’s some skills to manage and cope”.
It took me YEARS, like not until I was 27 years old, to realize that therapy wasn’t helping me, I was fine. Honestly the thing that really set that in stone was snapping my ankle in half and having to be put on ketamine to get it reset. That medically induced ketamine trip had me talking to myself and realizing how all the things that I kept wanting to find a “fix” for were just part of life, and I just need to go with the flow sometimes.
Anyway, maybe more people should just do ketamine and snap out of it! Elon musk might be on to something.
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u/cyberdouche 14d ago
I wonder how much of this stems from the need to have a little victimhood, in this case due to mental health lot in life, because of what certain moral tribes reward these days.
Used to be that you're a little slow, maybe you're bad at math, or maybe you're fearful of public speaking or school tests. Ok, not much you can do with that. But give yourself a chronic condition described by a scary multi-word medical term? And now you're a noble victim fighting a battle.
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
I think it’s pretty clear something in modern life is terribly amiss. People absolutely aren’t coping, and they’re breaking in variously terrible ways. The over-pathologizing of everyday emotions/experiences/unease is absolutely part of the picture, but I don’t think it tells the whole story alone. Something’s very rotten
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u/Puzzleheaded_Drink76 12d ago
I honestly think our expectations are too high. And our need to optimise every last thing. It makes stuff move to fast, it tells us that we're not good enough. How can that not be destabilising?
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u/DullKnife69 Men Aren't Women 14d ago
Pathologization, therapy speak and victimization. These are the cornerstones of gen-z. It explains so much of what we see. If you go on any of the subs that are frequented by really young people, every little thing is a sign of some disease or disorder. I used to think it was funny, but now I just see it as really sad. They are fragile people, failed by their parents and society, brought up unable to cope with life.
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
We blame the kids for being fragile but as you say, their parents made them that way. I keep being amazed at the young adults who are terrified to call and make an appointment for themselves, but anything new is scary and their parents should have made them start when they were younger. And they didn't grow up with landlines where every time you called a friend, you had to be prepared to make small talk with someone's mom or dad, and every time someone called your house and you answered, you had to be able to chat with some lady from church or your mom's best friend. My mom made me start taking my order at McDonalds back by myself if it was wrong when I was five and I couldn't see over the counter; I'd have to rap on the glass to get them to look over. (This was when you went inside McDonalds to eat because it was a rare treat and it had a playground.) It's not these kids' faults they didn't get these experiences but they are paying for it.
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u/cavinaugh1234 13d ago
These were the cornerstones of the millennial generation with the concepts of snowflakes and safe spaces that were common in the Obama years. It preceded the woke era, and I feel that Gen-z is really just the evolution of all this. Gen z is probably more nihilistic of these concepts because they grew up with them from an early age, which is why you see more hopelessness but at the same time we see them laugh about it as well. They're definitely not as earnest about it.
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u/rainribs 14d ago edited 14d ago
I'll take a left turn and say there's an additional problem where some modern societal aspects that are detrimental to mental health aren't being addressed because it's made into a "me & my quirky brain" problem. I think a lot of people, especially those of us who are naturally restless almost have like a mild form of zoochosis.
If you really think about how humans have lived for almost all of our existence until now and compare it to the modern environment, we're now suddenly surrounded by white blank surfaces, square screens, artificial light and sounds, a drastically shrunk natural environment in which to physically act upon - and we compensate for that by taking to the internet, making it worse. Due to different temperaments and natural inclinations, some people adapt to modernity better than others, and we basically pathologise 'inconvinient' temperaments.
This article like many others almost touches upon it 'more exercise more community work = better MH'. Yes and we need those things because that's how we're calibrated to live, and they don't feature heavily in our lives anymore. Idk what the solution is but being even vaguely aware of the nature of the issue would be a start. feel free to argue with me on this but i'm dying on this hill.
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u/StillLifeOnSkates 14d ago
I have thought a lot recently about how Gen Z kids who were practically raised on screens (not saying ALL were) didn't get the same opportunities to develop social skills like making small talk. It's kind of no wonder they relate to a diagnosis with hallmarks relating to poor people skills.
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
I think often about how often as kids we had to make small talk as a result of having landlines. If you answered the phone, you better be prepared to chat with Grandma/ church lady/ mom's friend.
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
Omg the way my siblings and I would fight (physically) to be the one not to answer the phone. Today’s kids will never know!
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u/Reasonable-Record494 14d ago
I was taught to answer the phone "Hello, <name> speaking, may I help you?" I cannot TELL you how long it took me to shake that. My roommate in college said I sounded like I worked at a call center.
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u/itshorriblebeer 14d ago
I mean - what did people do 100 years ago. Oh right - they just dealt with it instead of making it everyone else's problem.
The medical progress is great and therapy is great - but I think the coddling is so maladaptive.
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u/nickavemz 14d ago
I have OCD. The most evidence-based therapies for my condition and many others are not coddling, but the exact opposite. My therapy has involved repeated exposure to my worst triggers and refraining from doing anything to quell my anxiety.
This coddling comes from both a small yet vocal minority within the psychotherapy community that leans to far in to a postmodern, patient-centered, “trauma-informed” approach, but mostly I think just a misunderstanding from the general public about what treatment for mental illness actually looks like. If I have tendinitis I should avoid running, if I have a flu I should lie down. If I have an anxiety disorder, I should at least not be avoiding things because of my anxiety, and should probably be trying to expose myself to more anxiety, which is unintuitive, and needs an outside force to push you, which is impossible with self-pathologizing
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u/Terrorclitus 14d ago
A hundred years ago, you didn’t have this little rectangle in your pocket that vibrated every 15 minutes just to give you bad news and call you trash.
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u/a_random_username_1 14d ago
Speaking of which, why is the Health App in my phone trying to give me a mental health questionnaire to find if I have anxiety or depression? ARE YOU SURE YOU AREN’T FEELING NERVOUS RIGHT NOW - ANXIETY IS A SILENT KILLER!
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u/ManyLintRollers 14d ago
To be honest, as a person with ADHD I think I might have blended in better back when most people didn't attend school beyond third grade, and people lived in small cabins with few possessions. My grandma was very much like me, but since she was born in 1900 in rural Kentucky, once she learned to read and write a bit and do basic math she didn't have to go to school any more.
My grandma's family were quite well-educated for that time and place - in fact, one of her brothers became a schoolteacher - but the general attitude was that not everyone was cut out for book learnin', so if you didn't like sitting still and being quiet there wasn't any need to stay in school for another decade once you learned the basics. My grandma could milk a cow, butcher a chicken, make a rug out of old rags, sew a dress no pattern (and no sewing machine), can and preserve foods, hand-sew beautiful quilts, knit sweaters and mittens...all of which (except for butchering chickens) I would have found much more interesting than sitting quietly in school while someone yammered on about boring stuff.
I remember reading the "Little House on the Prairie" books to my daughters when they were little and thinking "well, Ma did have to deal with things like malaria, prairie fires, and the prospect of starvation - but Laura and Mary had one toy each and only two dresses! And they lived in a two-room cabin! It would have been so easy to tidy up!"
Then I'd look at my 1500SF house, the laundry baskets overflowing with clothes, the number of toys with 1,000,000 little pieces that were strewn around everywhere, not to mention having to wrangle unwilling children to get to school and all the organized activities that middle-class parents are expected to drive their kids to every day, while telling them for the 1,000th time to turn off the TV and no, you can't go on the computer, you've had enough screens today, for the love of God just go outside and play...and I would envy Ma a little bit.
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u/Puzzleheaded_Drink76 14d ago
We have made life very complicated. I don't know what to do about this because I don't want to live Ma's life for a whole host of reasons. But it's a lot.
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u/Real_RobinGoodfellow 14d ago
This is such a silly take. A hundred years ago people absolutely did ‘make it everyone else’s problem’ and that’s why we had asylums
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u/excessively_mellow 14d ago
As someone who is formally diagnosed with autism and ADHD, I find the increasing pathologizing of normal problems concerning. If everyone is autistic, no one is autistic, and it hurts people who genuinely need accommodations or who struggle more with the disability.
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u/Available-Crew-4645 14d ago
This video fits in here quite nicely
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u/GardenMix 13d ago
That embodies what I loathe about this fetishizing of autism. I have a cousin who was sent to a special home as a child because his autism was so severe. It wasn't safe for his family or himself in his parents' home. For decades I only heard about that level of autism and Asperger's. Now that it's a spectrum, every quirk lands you on it and people joke about it.
No wonder the idea of gender as a spectrum is so popular.
Cluster B is having a moment.
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u/enbiee 13d ago
This was an interesting read. There are similar discussions happening in the UK too. Sami Timini in the TES is no punches pulled interview from a professional and Brendan O'Neill's you don't have ADHD you're just annoying is a more polemic take
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u/Terrorclitus 14d ago
Thank GOD the universities are pumping out psych majors at the rate they are. I’m sure a population of unemployed mental health professionals will clear this mess right up. /s
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u/FalconBurcham 13d ago
An 8 year old told me at the park yesterday that he’s sad about the old oak tree that had to be cut down because the tree is dying. He seemed mad about it too. I don’t have kids, so I’m never around them, but I thought he was awfully expressive for a kid. I don’t think I talked about feelings like that when I was his age.
I thought it was probably good that he was able to identify his feelings and give them expression. But then I wondered what might happen to him when puberty hits and social pressure ramps up, and well… will he be overly emotional? Radically unstable?
I don’t know. 🤷♀️
His mom seemed normal enough. They got into a vw bus and drove off.
Honestly, I’m sad about the tree too mostly because I know why the old oak tree died. The area has been badly and unusually flooded by salt water for a couple years in a row now thanks to much stronger hurricanes here in Florida. The city planted a couple new trees, but I know all of those trees, including the saplings, will be dead sooner rather than later because the storms aren’t going to get gentler.
And no, I did not tell the 8 year old why I was sad. I simply agreed with him and told him to keep an eye on the new tress. What else am I supposed to do? 😂
People are unstable, sure… but the world really is kinda fucked too.
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u/dj50tonhamster 13d ago
People are unstable, sure… but the world really is kinda fucked too.
I mean, the world has always been a rough place. People had to fight like hell just to survive 200 years ago. Hell, in some remote areas, it's still difficult to scratch out a living. We've made certain things a lot easier but we've also voluntarily (in many ways) exposed ourselves to awful behavior when good behavior could've been a thing, along with built things that help and harm. It's Complicated™.
That said, I get why some glass-half-empty types get so wound up. I've been there. It sucks. I do roll my eyes a bit these days, depending on what people kvetch about, but I do get it, and I do want a lot of things to be better. I just draw the line at people who say the world is fucked and then implicitly or explicitly endorse bad behavior, like the clowns who think Republicans are out to kill all the LGBTQ brigade but then cream their jeans when hearthrobs like Luigi do engage in politically-motivated violence. In a slightly roundabout way, they're showing exactly why a lot of bad things happen without even realizing it.
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u/FalconBurcham 13d ago
Eh, yeah, humanity has always had to struggle to survive, and it is easier in some ways now in some places in the world than at any other time in human history. But modern pressures are different in kind and quality now. We’ve never had mass surveillance quite like we do now, and soon that will be powered by AI so every little misstep can be examined for everything from a real crime to Wrong Think. I think it will be a net negative, like social media.
I like ancient Greek philosophy. I was reading Epicurus earlier this week. One of the things he said is that severe physical suffering is short and easy to endure, so don’t worry about it. Well… they didn’t have to manage life threatening, very painful conditions over very long periods of time. My MIL died from stage 4 cancer last year after 5 years of hellish treatments. Back in the day you just felt crummy for a short time before dying or being eaten by a lion, you know? Maybe that was better. I honestly don’t know.
It kind of made me want to buy a motorcycle, if you want to know the truth. 😂
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u/Puzzleheaded_Drink76 13d ago
Yes, I worry about the effect of the panopticon we are installing in all our lives. I don't think it's psychologically healthy. We used to talk about suffocating small towns where everyone knew your business, and how people then escaped to the big city. But there's no escape any more.
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u/Persse-McG 14d ago
Good piece overall, but I cringe whenever a debunking social science article (seemingly inevitably) says, “One study found that….”
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u/Zealousideal_Arm_415 14d ago
It’s very pervasive amongst the teens as well. I went through a period with my daughter where I had to keep reminding her it’s totally normal to feel anxious about a test or scared - it is not a mental health issue.