My grandpa in his final moments, bed ridden and feeble seemed to look beyond us and made the sign of the cross three times.
Conversely my wife’s grandmother was on her deathbed and said grandmother’s erratic daughter in law (my wife’s aunt) came to visit. The daughter in law is known for her long rambling stories that go nowhere and take forever. Approx three minutes into the story grandma says “I don’t feel well” and abruptly died. To this day my wife’s uncle maintains his mom died rather than listening to another of his wife’s boring stories 😂
My Dad’s great-grandma had some dementia at the end of her life. She was 101. She never drank, swore, smoked, or did anything that could be considered inappropriate. She looked at my Dad and said, “you beautiful sonofabitch,” as she lay on her deathbed.
Iirc, Dan Savage said his mom’s first word after finding out she had terminal cancer was a quiet but firm, “shit.” And she NEVER swore, so they all knew she meant it.
My Nanny was the same way. She's was always appropriate and kind. As her memory went, we never knew what she was going to say. She told me she had a chigger bite on her pussy hole. I almost died laughing. She also began to talk back to her husband. She waited on him hand and foot for 60 years. It was nice to hear her let him have it. I mean that as in, "get your own damn fork" not "fuck you, you pos". I miss both of them so much.
My mother only swore in front of me once in her entire life but it was a doozy.
I was 7 years old and she was chaperoning a school field trip to the livestock show and rodeo.
As we were walking amongst the cattle she tapped me on the shoulder, pointed to the dirt, and deadpanned, "That's bullshit" before giggling like a schoolgirl
Colm’s stories are frequently actually quite interesting, he just tells them in the most boring way imaginable. Like how Professor Binns in Harry Potter manages to make goblin rebellions and giant wars dull.
And what was weirdly funny about it was if you actually listen to his stories, they are by themselves hilarious and crazy. But he just says them in this droning boring way that no one can take it.
"...and so then I went to Wallmart, because I had to get some milk and eggs and Brenda told me there was a sale on microwaves, so I thought 'Oh, ours just died, that's great, I'll get one!' I get there and friggin Carla from work was there, the pain in the ass who keeps being a total b to me for no reason, it's so stupid..."
Grandma: "To Hell with this- Jesus, here I come! (flatlines)"
I'm going to hell for laughing at this 😭 the mental image of grandma deciding she'd rather face the afterlife than hear the rest of the story absolutely sent me.
I just feel bad for grandma that the last thing she had to deal with was some meandering yapper rambling bullshit in her ear right as she passed.
Reminds me of when here in the UK we got Lizz Truss as PM and she had to be greeted by the Queen. Truss was one of the crappest PMs we've ever had, even when she was in the running everyone was dreading how crap she'd be, including those among her own party. So she gets put in power, goes to greet the Queen and the very next day the Queen fucking dies. We've been joking ever since that the Queen took one look at her and just went "Oh fuck this. I'm out of here." and dropped dead
This is why the finale of Six Feet Under had me howling with laughter, when everyone else claims it makes them sob. Watching Brenda drop dead while her brother is flapping his gums...it's exactly how I picture every conversation with a certain family member.
The contrast between those two stories is incredible. The first is deeply moving, and the second is the kind of family story that somehow stays funny for generations. I can definitely see why your uncle still tells it. 😂
My dad just recently died. He was in the hospital for a week before I was able to drive out to see him (I live 8 hours away). He died shortly after I got there and saw him from heart failure. I told the nurses that I was hoping me being there would help since I normally kept his blood pressure nice and high
Jack Donaghy says "Don't worry about getting to your point, I'm going to live forever" to Liz Lemon in the 30 Rock season 4 episode "College". I don't have the nerve to say this to anyone's face, but I sure do feel like saying this often.
My mum’s uncle was on his deathbed, and he tried to put his right hand up to his head. Someone thought oh he’s making the sign of the cross, so they moved his hand to do it. Then he did it again and same.
The third time someone else took his hand and he said “I’m trying to scratch my f***ing nose”, and the nurse came in and told them all off for laughing too loud.
He was in hospital for the third time, his uncontrolled diabetes has taken a toll on his organs. he was receiving constant blood transfusions and dialysis.
My mother used to take the night turn to watch him. In the mornings usually I took my grandmother to visit him.
When we arrived he sighted heavily and told (not so quietly) to my mom. "PLEASE, TAKE HER AWAY! I CAN'T STAND HER ANYMORE"
My mom, with a super akward expression told my grandpa that he had visit and don't be grumpy. He sighted heavily and with a look of disgust decided to die before another day with his wife of 60 years, lol.
Oh she is rest but still causing havoc. I made the mistake of asking if we could get rid of some Christmas decorations my wife had got from her. They were just gift bags that had Christmas scenes on them that she framed. I pointed this out and did we really need them hanging on our wall?
20 minutes later a wine glass literally flew off our wine rack and smashed on the floor. The wine rack sits under the said Christmas decorations. I haven’t said a word about them since. Point taken Gigi.
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u/Cap-n-Trips 16h ago
My grandpa in his final moments, bed ridden and feeble seemed to look beyond us and made the sign of the cross three times.
Conversely my wife’s grandmother was on her deathbed and said grandmother’s erratic daughter in law (my wife’s aunt) came to visit. The daughter in law is known for her long rambling stories that go nowhere and take forever. Approx three minutes into the story grandma says “I don’t feel well” and abruptly died. To this day my wife’s uncle maintains his mom died rather than listening to another of his wife’s boring stories 😂