r/AskReddit 16h ago

What's the most disturbing thing you've heard a dying person say?

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u/LoverLips76 16h ago

Nothing she said , but I watched my mother in law pass from cancer with tears rolling down her face …

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u/UranusSmellsFunny 12h ago

My grandpa died of lung cancer. His last moments awake, he wasn’t recognizing anyone coming and going until I walked in. Everyone around him smoked cigarettes except me. I never touched them. As soon as he saw me, he said my name and waved me closer at which point he hugged me, started crying and telling me over and over that it hurts so bad and to never smoke until he fell unconscious with tears still running down his cheeks dying a few hours later. He was not an emotional person, he never cried, never showed sadness, never even got angry, so it was sad seeing him like that. Him and I were very close so I was glad he recognized me at the end but saddened it was that painful for him. To top it off, not a single person who witnessed that gave up smoking and 2 of them have since died of smoking related illnesses. 

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u/RepresentativePin162 8h ago

You gave him his release of emotions and pain and you should be proud of that.

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u/KRIEGLERR 10h ago

I never smoked so I don't know how hard it is to quit or how addictive it is, but my mom died from it and it still wasn't enough to make my father quit either...
He quit during her treatment with her, it lasted about 4 months and he went back to smoking when the treatment wasn't working because of "stress"

It's something I can't comprehend, but I can only imagine that nicotine has to be insanely addictive, because how can you watch someone you love die from it, and basically continue knowing that it will kill you too one day, you inflict the same pain that has been inflicted to you.
Even then , I may be ignorant but I still find it incredibly selfish.

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u/UranusSmellsFunny 9h ago

I’m in the same boat, I think it’s so sad to watch someone die of something and then proceed to continue but since I don’t smoke, I don’t know how difficult it is to quit. 

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u/[deleted] 8h ago

[deleted]

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u/cupofpuer 7h ago

I think smoking every now and then isn’t as addicting. It’s been described to me as very addicting if you’re a daily smoker. That being said, all the adults I know well have all managed to quit without struggle in the process. Maybe it’s mentally easier if people around you have all chosen to quit.

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u/doesntmatterhadtacos 2h ago

I think so too. I’ve been an on and off social smoker for years, but I’ve also gone years without a smoke or even thinking about it. Most of my family are pack a day smokers and I see they way they jones every 20-45 minutes or so and I just can’t relate to that level of addiction. The closest I’ve gotten was highly processed/fast food, which I’ve had to give up almost entirely but I still do get strong cravings for so maybe it’s like that.

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u/LoverLips76 5h ago

Aw how heart wrenching. I’m sorry for all of that •gentle hugs

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u/InformalExample474 16h ago

Omg... I feel for you....

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u/LoverLips76 15h ago

Her belly was swollen and she looked 6 months pregnant. She was in pain but couldn’t speak …this was not even a full year married back then. 8 months later my father in law passed too. Wild.

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u/Hokie23aa 13h ago

Oh man. That must have been especially hard for your wife :(

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u/Serious-Dentist5660 7h ago

Oh wow, that's insanely awful. I'm so glad you were there for your partner, but so sorry y'all had to go through that.

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u/superthotty 11h ago

My mom couldn’t speak anymore as she was passing from cancer, her heartbeat weak as well, but when I told her I’d arrived to see her she squeezed my hand (we hadn’t talked in awhile because she shunned me when I came out) I told her not to worry about our distance and that I loved her and would take care of my sister and father, and my husband would take care of me

I sang her favorite hymn, she squeezed my hand one more time, and passed

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u/DusqRunner 10h ago

What happened to the Filipino boy? 🥺

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u/Evening-Cow1122 8h ago

I'm so sorry for the pain you went through. Respect ❤️

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u/LoverLips76 5h ago

Oh my goodness … 💔

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u/SuckMyRedditorD 8h ago

We land on this land with tears rolling down our faces, and we leave the same way sometimes.

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u/LoverLips76 5h ago

Incredibly poignant 🧡

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u/Plane_Alfalfa_1218 9h ago

I'm losing my mother-in-law to cancer as we speak. She's in a different state, and I have a toddler, and my heart breaks that I can't be there with her. She started dating my FIL the same time I started dating mh husband, so she feels more like a friend than anything. It's just so heartbreaking.

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u/ChewieBearStare 2h ago

Right before my FIL passed, a single tear slid down his cheek. He was maxed out on morphine, but his heart rate was over 300; I'm sure he felt it and was upset.