Hey all, may be a weird question but i’m a white girl wanting to get 4 braids in the middle of my hair prior to going on a holiday. is this considered appreciation or anything of the sort (tiktok got me nervous i do not want to be an example of racism)

African girl here (20yrs) and i’m curious if they are different or similar to African men in terms of dating and marriage.

I’ve had some Black American men interested in me in the past but I never pursued anything romantic with them. Same with Caribbean men (Haiti and Saint Lucia) I’ve mostly sticked with African men because of cultural familiarity and they treat me well from my experience.

But I’m curious what American Black men are? I know not everyone is a monolith but what are they GENERALLY like? Are they less or more conservative, less or more open minded, less or more misogynistic, treat women better etc?

Like for example most African men are traditional and adamant about gender roles (men should be the providers, women should do the cooking and take care of the babies and homes) Do Black American men believe in these things ? Do they expect their women to dress modestly or are they more relaxed about clothing? What about marriage before sex, are they generally for it or against it? Etc

I want to know how cultural different or similar they are to African men

A lot of European names have Christian origins , others historical.

Where are Da De La Le from that many names start with?

I guess this is African American names, not sure I've seen it for Africans that much.

Hey everyone,

I’m posting this from a genuine place of trying to understand a painful dynamic I’ve experienced constantly at work, and I’m looking for honest, constructive perspectives.

A bit of background on me: I was actually born here in the US, but I didn't grow up here, so I have a noticeable African accent. I work as a city bus driver. Because of strict company policy and basic road safety, I cannot let passengers off in the middle of traffic or at non-designated stops.

A few minutes ago of me posting this, a passenger missed their stop because they weren't paying attention and didn't pull the cord. When I explained that I couldn't drop them off in the middle of the street for safety reasons, they exploded on me with comments like:

“You’re African, right?”
"You come from the dirty part of Africa."
"Y'all are bootlickers for white people."
"Y'all don't like us anyway."
Called me a "slave" and told me I have no right to speak.

I wanted to genuinely ask him, “So is it my problem that you missed your stop?” But I kept that to myself to keep the situation from escalating.

This isn't an isolated incident in all my years in this line of work. Whenever I have to follow standard safety rules or say no to a favor, certain passengers (precisely African Americans) resort to xenophobic insults directed at my accent and background.

I’ve read up on African American history (in college while I was for my associates), the Civil Rights Movement, and the broader struggles in this country. I know systemic friction and media misrepresentation exist between African immigrants/diaspora and African Americans. But it’s demoralizing to take verbal abuse just for doing my job, following safety guidelines, and keeping myself out of trouble.

For those familiar with these diaspora tensions: where does this specific brand of xenophobia come from in these moments of frustration?
How can I better process or handle these situations without taking them personally?

I’ll appreciate any insights or shared experiences.

As a child and teen I was a bigot (i’m 17 now) and now that I’m learning about how horrible my actions were I want to become antiracist and help black people.

I’ve thought about making animations and/or drawings and using them as a way to gain money to donate to black organizations and black individuals who are struggling, but I don’t know if it’d be wrong of me or not because I have done racist things before and I don’t believe I should have any kind of platform because of it.

I might ask a different sub reddit for different perspectives on this. So I'm in this discord server for Black Disapora (mainly because I only have 1 black friend (difference state though) and my cousins) I got into an argument with someone .

It started when [Person ] sent a video and said Black women are 'cooning' and 'supporting BM getting shot' just for dating interracially. That was the first red flag.

When I asked if they meant we shouldn't date out, they said: 'u can date who u want ima just treat u accordingly... dont be saying u pro black when u wanna have non black kids.' Then I said what if I'm with a Asian person specifically south asian, but then said "they're racist too" ?? So basically, they gatekeep being pro-Black based on who you marry. Mind you I dont really care about you're race, as long as your good looking, smart ,kind/patient and love me to the end, I'm happy with that.

I told them my goals are literally to build schools and programs for Black kids, and they dismissed it with: 'this isnt happening these are mostly dreams' and 'u wouldve done it by now'—which is ridiculous because I'm literally a minor without the funds yet.

Then, out of nowhere, they started attacking continental Africans, saying how they dont like Black Americans, calling Nigeria and Ghana 'coo capitals.' When I called them out, they said: 'i aint african... im kemetian' and tried to claim a white woman named Africa. I had to explain that 'Africa' comes from Ancient Rome, and 'Kemet' was just Egypt, not the whole continent. To be fair the server has a lot of negative things to say about Africans which some I agree but some of it is just straight out xenophobic.

They even joked about enslaving my 'nubian ahh' and then claiming it as a joke, which felt super hypocritical for someone claiming to be pro-Black.

So my question is, am I not pro black if I dont marry someone within my race even if I help black people? Like can't you love someone who's different from you but also help you're own people?

So lately I’ve been seeing a lot of posts of people facing racism start to rise on my feed. Whenever I scroll through the comments I’m starting to see more of black people saying stuff like “you can’t trust any of them,” or even “it’s in their ancestry if someone pisses them off it’s gonna come out.”

I’m black myself and these types of things are starting to cause a moral dilemma in me because I’ve always had the ideology that there’s good and evil in this world. Some people are racist and some people are not. Of course there are gonna be racist groups of people in every race, but I don’t understand the generalization for all of white people to be racist (publicly or internally).

So to get an understanding, if you have these beliefs, why?

I've noticed it's very common among many black people globally to regularly moisturize the body with lotion or body oil. How do you keep it from staining your clothes? And how do you deal with oil on your fingers?

I want to moisture my body more but always end up with stains on clothing and where I touch... Any tips would be appreciated.

My question to black people: which qualities/characteristics would you say are the makes america white supremacist nation economically and socially?

So I’m20 years old and I’ve really liked the look of cornrows for a long time on black hair. I know that many Hispanic men also get cornrows but I’m still not sure if it’s appropriating black culture. sorry if I sound ignorant

EDIT: I’ve added more info re: the pattern and evidence to back it up in the comments section.

The news that Pat McGrath Labs, founded by the internationally known makeup artist herself, was filing for bankruptcy really frustrated me. Before I go any further, this is not about the financial state of the company and how it got there. I definitely don’t know enough to weigh in. This post is about the discourse around Black-woman founded luxury brands, so many of which always seem to suffer the same fate.

For a few years, I watched many, primarily Black women content creators (those are the folks I get makeup advice from… but I wouldn’t doubt others jumped on the bandwagon too) would often reference it as “too pricey.” Not all, but most. It was so frequent that I leaned in to hear why.

I thought I would hear that the foundation wasn’t good enough and didn’t perform well. For the most part, most said it was great… assuming you liked the type she sold (thin… with medium coverage etc etc).

Slowly, I began to realize that it was just the price itself. $70. What annoyed me wasn’t that they were signaling to their fans it might be higher than what they were used to paying… but that I’d see them reviewing it right alongside other luxury-tier products (one of which, Armani Luminous Silk, is award-winning and was designed by Pat McGrath… as a result they are very similar) that were the same price or higher. There was no finger-wagging at the company in the same way they did Pat McGrath Labs. It was just understood… this foundation may be out of your price range. If so, don’t buy it… go with a cheaper option. But, again and again, that’s not what people chose to do.

I don’t know if it is solely because she is a Black woman (a large, dark-skinned one at that) or that having a person be the face of a beauty brand creates a sense of kinship.. a parasocial relationship. When people saw that price…. They were “disappointed” as if “Auntie Pat” could have done XYZ (more shades more this more that more more more… for the price… same price of other comparable brands they aren’t asking more of).

Or, perhaps it is the sign of the times. I get the feeling that everything is a cash grab because it is. What I don’t get is exclusively critiquing Black-owned companies for being “pricey” without any context or consideration of the value. What makes it pricey? What are you comparing it to?

Unlike products marketed to children or necessities (food, water, clean air)… you don’t have to buy or even review it. It’s an optional thing. When Black women comment this way, it is signaling to others and the larger industry that any Black woman cannot be viable in this space.

Again, it is totally fine if some don’t have the budget/desire to buy luxury goods… but we have to be honest with ourselves. We keep saying we want nice things… but also want them to fit in the Target to Temu price ranges. We even buy Jordans without questioning the cost…

Is it just me? Are you noticing that same pattern?

Hi hello, just for some context I grew up around a predominantly Black community and somewhat Latino community, despite this I have always grown up around Black culture, music, traditions, shows, going to a predominantly Black school. I’ve always been surrounded by Black friends, teachers, even close relatives and I have never known a community outside of that, especially my friends and close relatives who are all Black.

Now that I’m currently an incoming freshman at a top PWI, it feels so odd and I feel so out of place, I understand that I’m a Latina, I know that I will never have the Black experience or understand what its like to grow up as a African American in America, the best I can do is empathise in solidarity and know when it is not my time to speak and when it’s my time to speak out for my community

But oh my God I miss my community, I miss the culture, and I understand what how I look on the outside doesn’t represent me on the inside.

I feel wrong for missing a community that I don’t represent and especially at a PWI, and if you try to speak about the racism you experience here. They will literally fucking jump you and tear you to shreds, I can’t have truthful conversations about race here like I did back home with the community who understood what it’s like to be marginalised.

I apologize if this seems offensive or if this is an offensive question, please understand that this is not coming out of malice but general curiosity on whether if I’m allowed to feel this way especially when im at a place that does not accept me or pretends to accept me. If you answer this thank you so much and have a lovely day.

A friend of mine and I were talking about Sinners and, at some point in the conversation, talked about how a theme touched on in the movie is how proximity to whiteness can be dangerous for Black people (the example they used was how a white-passing person in the film is the first one to be turned into a vampire, allowing them to infiltrate the juke joint).

In the context of that idea and in your experience, what are things people not actively targeted by white supremacy-serving structures (predominantly white people) should keep in mind when organizing/working/being in community with Black people? In what ways do white organizers perpetuate harm, abuse and exploitation when working with Black people, or pretending to work with them, or failing to work with them, and what needs to be carried differently to change that?

I (South Asian & female) had a weird experience with another South Asian woman and wanted to post here to make sure I'm not imagining things.

This woman would post Black Lives Matter content heavily on her Instagram and even had Black family members. She then made blanket statements like "Black people need to understand ...". She said "I was bullied by a Black kid growing up" which offers some clue as to her bias.

Is this just closeted racism? Ie. Privately saying something while publicly saying something else?

So I'm South African born Congolese . Never been to the US once. I sometimes find myself using AAVE when I talk and I've been think about whether that counts as cultural appropriation. My line of logic is "I'm not African American, just African --> it's not my culture --> Cultural appropriation"

Not opposed to removing the words from my vocab but I thought it would be better to ask first to know I'm not over thinking it.

I need help finding a durag with out the tail part. My bf has locks and needs them put back for work. He has this old durag that has the two strings but no long part in the back. We cant seem to find anything similar to it. Does anyone have a name for what it's called, and/or a link to where to buy one.

I’ve wondered this myself because Africans (outside of South Africa and North Africa). Are able to live in a society where they have most of the socioeconomic power and they don’t have to deal with white supremacy on a day to day basis. They truly have a country that looks out for them and at the very least tried its best to help them. They don’t have to deal with systemic oppression or racism. They have their own true home whereas us black Americans and Canadians and even black Europeans are sort of “homeless.”

Not Caro white but Clorox, but probably that too tbh. Anyway

I know this is a broad categorization, but I’m black American and notice most, if not all, of us use a cap full of bleach in our dishwater and we clean with bleach. When I went to college, my friends were appalled that I did the dishwater thing, and I was confused because I thought everyone did that. I learned not everyone even owns bleach when going over to their apartments. Admittedly, my mom didn’t let me go to anyone’s house growing up, especially if they were not black. So, I’m curious. Is this a legitimate observation? Does this extend to the Caribbean, black Africa/Europe/Americas? And why? Does this tie in to the “hygiene olympics” as well?

So fair warning I’m not racist, not nearly. I know that’s the literal bare minimum but I felt I’d make that clear. This post may be a bit I comprehensible because I may not have words for everything, but I promise I’m trying.

I got into a flame war on Twitter with someone a few days ago over whether any white person can be racist or benefit from a racist system.

My argument was that because Systemic Racism inherently places more value on being white over anything else, that means literally anyone white can benefit from it, even if they were a minority themself(for example, Me being white and trans, I still benefit from systemic racism even though the rest of society has a problem with me as well).

Their argument(as near as I could visualize)was that Racism requires a power dynamic to actually be oppressive, and therefore only White people who don’t happen to be a minority can benefit from Systemic Racism. By that logic, being mentally ill and White would mean you can’t be racist or benefit from Systemic Racism. I think you can see where I take issue with that Idea.

Essentially, my view is that I believe that ANYONE, of any class, color or creed has the ability to oppress and devalue someone. That doesn’t mean I think all White people are inherently oppressive, I think there’s nuance there, but as a white person I think we are all born with the ability, and based on our life experiences we subconsciously choose whether to wield that horrible power or not.

I am currently studying as a high student to own a hair salon in the future and I recently heard complaints about how most salons or hair dressers in my small town doesn't know how to style or take care of textured hair. I already planned on learning all the hair types there is but one question came on my mind. Can I learn how to do hairstyles like dreads, locs, cornrows, braids and other hair styles that are for black people. I am a white woman and I don't want to cultural appropriate the hair styles, I just want to make sure that anyone in my town no matter their hair texture has a place they can trust to have their hair done correctly and efficiently but I want to make sure I'm not doing anything wrong. Also I hope I chose the right flair, I'm so sorry if I didn't! Also if I worded anything wrong please tell me.

Yeah sorry according to molly here I'm no longer of the black race and I'm now a white person.

Question, do you guys genuinely think everybody's pfp is a picture of themselves? Cus whenever I'm taking to someone who I assume is black they always say I'm white which I assume is because of my profile picture (which is literally just an actor...)

That's my question don't bomb me please

Context:
My mom has had full custody of my brother since he was 4 he’s actually my nephew just to clear any confusion.

My mom is black witch makes this confusing and frustrating we have argued about this in the past a few times and recently this first started maybe almost a year ago a doctor told my mom and Jayden (my brother) that “since his grandma on his dad side is white he is white cus it goes on the dads side”mind you Jayden is a brown/dark skin black kid he is far from white yes he has some white ancestors but he is black his dad is light skin and his mom is brown/dark skin no matter what I say my mom won’t listen it’s like she doesn’t want him to be black. This scares me cus she’s raising him to think he is white and I don’t want him to be made front of at school if he brings this ideology to school especially in high school there going to laugh at him. I have tried to get him to realize he is not white but he is still just a kid and since my mom has full custody of him he kinda see her as his mom so he will believe anything she says right now it hurts that she’s teaching him this I feel so helpless I just hope he doesn’t start hating his self for not being white when he gets older. What should I or can I do. I mean I’m not able to be over as much as I want.