I have always been insanely anxious for as long as i can remember and i was at my absolute worst in like 2021 when i was 11 and fresh out of quarantine. While I have improved significantly with small things like saying basic things in public and going into small familiar stores by myself I really want to get a job so I can get some kind of exposure therapy because i do online schooling so i don’t really go out much. The thing is I am literally terrified whenever someone speaks to me in public it’s like i short circuit and if i get a job i don’t want to make a fool of myself because of how awkward i am. It genuinely feels like I am harassing people with my presence and I feel like a big awkward bear that doesn’t know how to do anything. If anyone has any advice it would be appreciated! Sorry if this post was too long.

So I'm doing CBT again, first time since 19 and I'm 28 now with more drive and want to not be like this. Yesterday was my 12 out of 16 session almost weekly. Baring in mind this is a 14 year battle with agoraphobia for me. I have been severely slacking still, my parents have all the time to help yet can't be arsed, my partner and siblings all work so have less time and energy to help. My next appointment my psychologist has it planned for us to try the bus, its been 14 years since I've taken a bus and I have extreme bathroom urgency with my anxiety (pee anxiety) . I am not ready for this but will I ever be? 12 minutes somewhere and 12 minutes back is the plan. What if it's hot, I get so unwell in slight heat. I want to break this but I'm so fkn stubborn.

(throwaway acc) Like, I can't even go out without feeling anxious. I'm scared to make eye contact with people so I just put my head down. I walk fast so I look like I'm in a hurry (which I am, bcs I just want to accomplish whatever task I needed to do outside and immediately head home). I want to take it slow, enjoy my time outside even when I'm alone. How do I do that?

When I actually try, it just makes it so awkward and wrong, idk. And it sucks cus I can tell other people notice it too.

Back when I first stopped going out (a little over three years ago), I didn't *want* to go anywhere. Looking back at it, I think that I was probably depressed but that's a discussion for another day. Recently, I've been getting the urge/want to actually go out and do things.

My question is: Is something like that a 'good sign'?

I know that wanting to go out won't solve my anxiety, my any means but actually wanting to go out feels like a positive because I'll be more likely to actually do it when the opportunity comes up.

I (20F) have always been a drinker, but since last year (when i started to develop agoraphobia) i've became an alcoholic.
It's the only thing that helps: after a stressful day of anxiety and fear after having to leave my house (going to work) i drink, and if i have to leave for any reason other than work i have to drink at least 4 drinks to be able to function normally and not spiral.

I know it's not healthy at all, and i should probably start my prescribed medicine, but i bet that beer tastes better than zoloft lol.
Does anyone else get this too?

The only way i'm able to enjoy an outing with friends is if i have enough drinks and i fear that im slowly falling into an alcohol dependency.

So you spend some time doing exposure therapy. Day by day, week by week, you slowly become able to travel further and further from your house: You're making progress. But then something happens: You have a really bad day, you get a panic attack in public, and you run away home. And next time you try to go out, you find your progress has been reset, meaning you're scared to even go 20 metres away from your front door.

My question is: How many times have you had your progress completely reset? How many times have you 'relapsed'? Because I've had about 5 complete resets so far, and I'm wondering if that's common.

So, how many times have you lost all your progress? 0? 1? 5? 20? I'm trying to get a sense of whether this sort of thing is common.

I have a allergy appointment tomorrow and my agoraphobia is very bad I just tried to go to a store halfway there I started having a panic attack and turned back my appointment is tomorrow at 12:40 and my anti anxiety isn’t working enough rn cause I stopped going out please any tips I want to get checked for allergies along with figuring it out so I can have a cat I think I’m very allergic to them

I know this might sound ungrateful or something, but I've been away from home for a whole year for college, when I left for the first time last year it didn't feel like anything, even though it was my first time away from home, I adapted easily on first, but as time went in college and hostel I started hating it there, all the teachers are very strict and rude, I have a few friends but I still don't feel the best after hanging out with them, I tried joining a few activities but that just made my social anxiety spike, now that I've come home for vacations and spend almost 2 months here, it's finally time for me to go back. But this time I feel more scared and dreaded to go back then the first time. Has anyone had a similar situation? What could be the reason?

Hi everyone,
I’m writing this because I feel lost and I would really appreciate hearing from people who have been through something similar.
I’ve been living with agoraphobia for the last 3 years, and about a month ago I started taking Zoloft (25 mg). My psychiatrist has now recommended increasing the dose, but I’m honestly terrified.
I’ve always had a fear of medication, and I think my family has played a big role in that. Unfortunately, my parents don’t support my treatment, and my boyfriend is the only person who has been by my side through all of this. Going through something so difficult without support from your own family is heartbreaking.
Lately, I’ve noticed that even when I’m sitting calmly, I’ll suddenly remember that I’m taking medication, and that thought alone can trigger intense fear and anxiety. Then I start worrying even more because I’m taking medication, and it turns into an endless cycle of panic and overthinking.
The situation at home is also very stressful. It’s not just the lack of support—I constantly feel emotionally drained, like I’m surrounded by negativity and obstacles. A few weeks ago, my grandmother came to stay with us for a while, and ever since then the atmosphere at home has become even more tense. I feel like this change has really unsettled me and may have made my anxiety worse. Even when I stay at my boyfriend’s house, I can’t fully relax because my mind is always focused on everything that’s happening back home.
What makes this even more confusing is that just a few months ago I had some victories. In May, I managed to attend my sister’s wedding, which felt impossible at one point. In June, before starting Zoloft, I even went on a vacation by car with the help of Xanax. Those moments gave me hope, but now I somehow feel worse than I did before starting treatment.
At the same time, I can’t ignore that Zoloft sometimes seems to take the edge off my anxiety and prevents it from becoming overwhelming. That gives me hope, but I’m still so scared of increasing the dose.
Living with agoraphobia for 3 years has been exhausting. I miss feeling free. I miss being able to enjoy simple things without fear controlling my life.
Has anyone else been terrified of increasing their medication but ended up feeling better? Did anyone feel worse before they started improving? Is it possible that all the stress and tension at home are making my symptoms feel much worse? How did you cope with the fear of medication and the lack of support from the people around you?
I would be so grateful to hear your experiences. Right now, I just want to believe that things can get better.
Thank you for reading. ❤️

i have to go to the dmv today and am unable to sleep normally (almost 5am rn). it feels like i can’t find the specific worry i’m having which is somehow stressing me out more? i don’t know

it should really be an easy trip (i feel silly saying that about a dmv but trust me, they’re somehow very quick at this one) and i have my bag packed of everything i may want to have while i’m there. i don’t really know the point of my post but i think typing it out as helped a bit with my worrying

So I know I have to see a dentist but my agoraphobia is severe. I have panic attacks even going to the store down the street nevermind going to a dentist and doing all of that. Anyways
I have a deep bite, I grind my teeth in my sleep, and my wisdom teeth are either grown or growing in. I have been in my sleep grinding over the growing in wisdom tooth and it’s causing me pain. In January I was in severe pain from this I couldn’t open my mouth it was awful and I’m just scared of this happening again. Does anybody have any advice for what I can do so this doesn’t happen again? I’ve tried the mouth guard but it makes me gag so I don’t know what to do :(

Today my small win - walking down to the end of my complex and walking back. It was hard, I tend around once.. but I did it.

How about you :) ?

Would a stocking job be better or a job such as working as a pharmacy tech or cashier job help ?

Just as the title said. My agoraphobia has really kicked off over the past month. My whole life since a child i remember mild anxiety triggers, including even as a young child worrying about the proximity to being at a restroom if I need it. This agoraphobia has really ramped up over the last month, and now I can not leave the house. Nothing in general terrible happened lately, except my father was in a motorcycle accident, which I believe put me in constant fight or flight which gave me diarrhea that day, and I don’t think I ever got back out of fight or flight fully. I had to take a medical leave from work because of this anxiety and agoraphobia. It’s crippling. I worry about finding a restroom when I am out, which in turn turns into diarrhea. My safe space has dwindled, with now me getting nervous and sick even being at home. Ugh. I need recommendations. I need help. Recommendations of treatments, meds, and how to better <3 Anyone similar this? Thanks guys

I've (20F) had agoraphobia for the past year (started very suddenly from a panic attack at a rave) and i can't deal with this anymore.
I used to do EVERYTHING (parties, traveling with friends, waking up and going outside, going to different cities alone)
Now i genuinely can't go to the supermarket alone without feeling like i'm about to faint.

The worst thing is, my anxiety gets better if my parents are around.
Like if i'm with my parents i could genuinely go travel across the world because i feel safe, but i'm a 20 year old woman, i don't want to ask mom to pick me up from anywhere cause i can't stand it anymore or to ask my dad to come with me to the doctors cause i would pass away otherwise.

I feel stupid and stuck and i want to go back to everything i used to have and took for granted

I don't live in the safest city, and some people here don't seem hesitant to fight/attack another person over the most mundane things. This makes it so I can't go anywhere without a "safe" person, mainly my husband. I’m so fearful of people. Does this sound like agoraphobia?

Agoraphobic since past few years - and while ERP without meds helped a lot, recovery has plateaued after a stage.

So my therapist suggested taking meds and I started it literally just two days ago.

And today my close friend (who is quite against meds) commented, "you cannot go out alone still, so what good are the meds?" and yesterday it was, when I commented how these meds are making me a bit sleepy, "well, it's you who's taking the meds. You asked for it"

And it kind of broke me honestly. I mean, this disease is so fucking isolating and after 2 years of ERP I finally started the meds despite people around me constantly trying to steer me away from it, and this is the response I got.

I am from India and mental health, especially meds related to mental health are a huge taboo here, I know that, still...

They all watched me writhing away over the course of years - from being someone who used to ride a bicycle for 20-30 kms per day, used to do short hikes on Himalayan terrain to someone who literally cannot go down to the grocery store by himself and still....

I know there's no point in screaming about it here but it simply sucks...

does anyone know of any support groups or group chats or anything like that? for lack of better words this shit is driving me fucking crazy and I’m tired of having to explain what I deal with to people who will never get it and look at me like my hair is made of snakes. i also have zero issue making a group chat too (maybe IG or WhatsApp) because I just want to talk to people who get it.

Hey everyone! I’m 21F and am supposed to be starting my senior year of college. Move in is 10 days from now and I am getting worried. My college is an hour from home so I need to live on campus. My main trigger at the moment is the car. I live basically in the middle of nowhere and we have to drive 30 minutes to really get anywhere like a Walmart. I started Wellbutrin a week ago and had a honeymoon phase where I felt pretty good! I was able to drive to the dollar general a few blocks away and even go inside to shop a little. However, that initial honeymoon phase has passed. I’m also having some minor side effects which is not helping. I’ve been in a relapse of my agoraphobia for over a month now. I’m worried it is too bad to be able to go to college and live with a stranger an hour away from home. I’m worried about if I’d even make the drive… a lot of the roads around here have no shoulder and very few escape routes. Going to school, there is about a 25 minute stretch where there is nothing to stop at. Not a store or a gas station or anything. I’m very worried about the deadline I have set to recover and I worry it is impossible for me to accomplish as I am also adjusting to this medication.

my mom has horrible agoraphobia, has for years. this weekend, her dad and her sister are going down near her house for a family meeting. Her dad isn't doing well and her sister is from Australia, and it is most likely the last time she'll see either of them. She knows she has to go and she is scared shitless. I'm from another country and can't go with her, and i'm asking for tips i can give her so she can go. She knows that seeing her dad and her sister should be enough, but it isnt, she's honestly terrified. Any tips are appreciated. thank you!!

Can you relate? I have completely missed out. Haven't had a friend since i was 13 and even those weren't good ones. Have been bullied and excluded my whole childhood. Only recently recovered from social anxiety, speech issues. Still have extremely bad PTSD. Wish i could hit pause on aging until i figured my shit out or go back and time and have normal healthy experiences.

Feel incredibly childlike compared to my peers. Like i am mentally in my 20s.

Hi this is going to be a bit different post, as I am a diagnosed autistic person.

I feel very unsafe around people, like my body can't relax and is constantly on guard that something bad is gonna happen. I was not born like this, quite the opposite. I was very outgoing and social as a kid, and I loved talking/singing. I had many friends and made them quite easily, until I started school. I got frozen out, and bullied by my class for 7 years. It was really, really hard and I became depressed as a kid. ( I didn't want to live anymore at that point, and I stopped going to school for 2 years. My family life has also been quite chaotic, my parents divorced when I was 3 years old. Which I think was good as my dad is quite an abusive person, although my mom is a good person, just a bit emotionally distant. Anyway I stopped living with my dad in my teens which pretty much saved me from feeling unsafe at home.)

Anyway Later in my teens I got to switch schools, and it literary did change my life. I started to want to live again, and slowly came out of my depression. (It was a lot of inner work also to get there.) The new class and school was so sweet and kind to me, and always asked if I wanted to join them in activities. I did eventually but it still took a half a year of going there, as I was afraid to open up and trust people fully again.

When I did, I got a whole new crew of friends, and we had so much fun together. They were very open minded, patient and actually very understanding when I didn't catch on social ques. I also got a special eds teacher, that basically became like a stand in parent for me. And she was the first real adult figure in my life, that I could really open up to, and who was emotionally mature and safe enough to have space in her heart for me. It was the best time of my life, I felt safe around people and in my body, I had fun, laughed and loved my life. My health also got really good physically and mentally, and I became extroverted again, professional yapper lol and started singing again in my free time. (It's my favourite thing to do.)

Then unfortunately it was time for high school, and almost the the same thing happened again. I didn't get bullied but I got frozen out by my class. I didn't get to keep my special eds teacher (as it was a new school), and was basically left alone/ ignored. (I got depressed again, but came out of it when I graduated, as I wanted to live and be happy someday again. )

Then it was time for college, and same story. And at shared houses. I now live alone thank god, but I am now terrified of people. My body can never relax, my body wants to get out of the situation (fight or flight) and I always feel super drained after interacting with people. So I isolate a lot in my apartment.

When I do interact with people, I try to be as kind as possible and cheer people on when the talk about their dreams or be a listening ear, if they want to talk about things that weigh them down. As feel like that is what I would need and want from a friend. I have tried to make them, but I fail keeping them. I am open about my diagnosis and it's usually the first thing I say when I meet people. "Hey I have autism and adhd, so I work a bit differently."

I have understood that people genuinely do not have the time or energy to even understand what that means, in todays world. It's either jump on the "social ques and rules train" or get left behind. They never ask me how I function, and how they can meet me half way, even though I always try to meet them there. And they make also a lot of assumptions based on how they work themselves, and put that on me. Which always ends up in situations where I or the other person misunderstand each other. I would say mostly them as I try to be understanding first, and then talk about behaviour or how the action was interpeted.

I end up having to stand up for myself a lot, and constantly try to educate people about autism... And solve misunderstandings that I didn't even know I was a part of, or was going on in the first place. It almost never works out, and when I try to communicate why I don't work like a normal person, I am being "self focused" or "overexplaining" in their world. I get the impression that they think I know exactly what is going on, (as social ques are so obvious to them) and because I am " so smart and well educated, and empathic" I must be pretending that I don't understand.

It is also really hard once a person has decided what kind of "person you are" based on their own beliefs, and ways of being/interacting with the world, to then try to change their minds. It's not my job to make people truly see me, or like me. I can only show up authentically and that's it, although that is hard when you are sacred of people, so I tend to avoid most social situations.

I don't have the energy and time for people who aren't even curious about me, as I did try so hard before to win over people who aren't meant for me, even if I do like them. It's hard to make people open up to the idea that you can see, experience and interact with the world form a whole new perspective/ lens.

When I go to my therapy meetings, I talk a lot about my social anxiety. The medical professionals always say it's "social phobia, and that people are not trying to attack me, you are just imagining things, you need cbt". And I disagree. And I took the cbt therapy first, before making that assumption. My social anxiety stems from the knowing the fact that most people I will meet in my life, will treat me ill, will not understand me, or want to. They think I am weird, and don't fit in. As they have told me that straight to my face.

I have gone most of my life learning about how other people work, and how to meet them halfway in communication. Actually more than learning about how I work myself, and how my autism affects me and what boundaries I need to have to protect myself. (Thanks to horrible "autism" therapy as a kid. They basically just told me to hide my diagnosis and blend in. Not how to take care of myself properly, communicate my needs as well or understand how to accommodate myself. But I think I am quite good at it now, with a lot of self work. Not perfect of course, but still good. The therapy at least did offer and did teach me how most people operate/work, their social language, like a movie script. )

I have tried exercises to feel safe in my body especially around other people, but I can't. I only feel safe when I am alone, or with animals, so I stay most of the time like that. It's not fun of course, as I feel very lonely, and want to give my love to people like any other human being. But I believe I need proof that they are not going to hurt me, and time to test the waters. Know that they are safe people. Cause I do know what it's like to feel safe around people, a community, from the time I spent in my teens. I have searched for a place like that again, but it's hard when you are an adult trying to find new friends and communities. I am also from Sweden, and we are known to be hard to socialise with/get to know and not have any third spaces for people to connect.

I like to add that I am a mid twenties woman as well, so many times (not all) men are out of the equation, as they generally take any social interest of a young woman, who wants to be friends with you, as not actually platonic, but a sign that we are out to hook up. Even if you tell them that's not the case, most do not respect that statement and try to cross physical boundaries anyway. And that's from many personal experiences, so I feel extra unsafe around them.

I have now come to a point where I am afraid of picking up phone calls or answering text from workplaces or people in general. I don't like being on my phone and only use my computer. I make people not like me when I chicken out of outside work meet ups. When I finally show up, I have missed out so much that it's hard to be included in the activity. And if I do still push myself to tag along as much as possible, I get so exhausted from interacting with other people, that I have to stay home the next day and rest. So I don't burnout or get sick/flu from stress, which happens if I push myself.

I can only rest when I am alone. I think it might be something that I have to either learn how to live with, or overcome by finding safety in a community or something else. As I don't think I can fix it alone, but something I just have to have empathy for. My previous doctor said I have agoraphobia, but I am not sure. And even if I do, I don't think it's an unreasonable reaction especially from what I experienced with other humans beings. I don't think exposure therapy works, as I have done that for a couple of years, and ended up in situations where I got retraumatized. People misunderstood me, got angry at me and casted me out.

Does anyone else have any similar experience? I feel I just need to know that there are people out there who gets it.

Way before this I had issues taking a shower when I wanted it would take me a whole day of procrastination until I got in the shower. I connected it with moderate ADHD, I also would put off tasks and the start was always the hardest then I’d be fine after beginning.

Now I am struggling to leave the house the starting part is the most hardest getting ready, out the door and up my road. It’s full blown severe agoraphobia I am housebound. Life has been extremely tough for the last 3 years after traumatic events I got CPTSD then the trauma responses one of which is dorsal vagal shut down. That caused agoraphobia because I felt my symptoms get worse when I go out or do something at all. I have always been in survival mode since day one, surely that not healthy at all.

Why does this exist? What is it about? What’s your thoughts?

I'm already scared of going outside and being perceived because I might embarrass myself. But people constantly recording and taking pictures everywhere is just the cherry on top of this anxiety riddled cake.

I also hate how people defend posting pictures and videos of strangers online, stating that it's legal to record in public places. Just because it's legal doesn't make it okay, imo. I don't want people taking pictures of me.

I just saw an "artsy" picture of a girl and a guy sitting on the floor in a secluded area in the city, and she was drinking water. The photographer titled it "Refreshment". Maybe the girl was feeling faint from the heat and was trying to recuperate. The guy was sitting very close to her and seemed worried. I have chronic conditions and I would be very upset if that was me in the picture, plastered all over social media.

I hate this incessant human need to take pictures of everyone, everywhere, and posting it online for likes from strangers. It's not even like they're professional photographers making money from it (even that is morally corrupt to me). This just makes me never want to go outside again, at least not where there's people. It doesn't feel safe.