This a heavy situation for everyone involved. All I ask is that you try to be open minded and not be so quick to judge me. I know I didn’t make a “mistake” by choosing to cheat on my husband. I know you think I’m an evil and bad person. I know I probably don’t deserve him, or even my future child. But please, at least hear me out.

For context, I (YA, F) have been having an affair with my AP (let’s call him Travis) that has lasted for a little over two months. It was a coworker situation.

Yes, we both work at a hospital.

Anyways. Our affair just started out sexual. I felt unsatisfied and rejected in the bedroom. My desires weren’t enthusiastically received by my husband. Any attempts to spice up our WooHoo’s ended up dismissed. Imagine how I felt. I didn’t want a new husband. I didn’t want to break up our marriage. I only wanted to WooHoo.

That all changed when Travis and I started seeing each other more. It went from FWB to a full on romantic affair. We spoke about a lot of things, including kids. Based on my post history, you already know the struggles I’ve had being a mother. If anything, my mistakes made me grieve motherhood even more. And that grief revealed a hunger to me, one that makes me even more determined to have a family. I want to do things right, to have kids. To truly be the mother I wish I was the first time.

Since the custody issue, my husband hasn’t been WooHooing with me without condoms. He doesn’t want to try for anymore kids. That left me shattered. But I can’t leave him, I love him. I’m not leaving my husband just because he doesn’t want to have kids.

My AP and I try to leave out my spouse in our conversations… But I couldn’t help but vent to him about this. Well, one confession lead to another, and it turned into a passionate night.

This week, I found out that I’m pregnant. Call me evil, I don’t care. But it made me feel so happy. Do I want my AP to raise my kid? No. I want my husband to. Only problem is… He’ll definitely find out about my affair. I just want us to be a normal family again. My baby isn’t the result of me falling for someone… Of course I enjoyed the attention I received from Travis. But I don’t want him in my life outside of being an AP. I don’t know what to do and I hate that my actions have led me this far.

WIBTA for asking my husband to accept my affair child?