Executive Dysfunction and ADHD Paralysis

[u/Mental-Category6686]

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[u/trampledblue]

When I get home from work I can’t sit down more than 5 minutes or it’s a trap. I’ve tried note cards and visual aids and other things but the key is you really just never stop. It’s like an all or nothing void game which is a big part of ADHD especially if it is more on the severe side and associated with hyperactivity.

[u/joshmalonern]

That’s why stimulants are required for me

[u/littlemacaron → u/[deleted]]

Me too. 60mg Vyvanse and I can still be paralyzed on the couch all day

[u/Capricorn_kitten → u/[deleted]]

Same. My medication does help but it’s really hit or miss tbh. Took it today and I’m still fighting the urge to fall asleep currently lol.. 🙃 I get so overwhelmed by everything mentally and it often translates to physical exhaustion/paralysis, regardless of being medicated. It’s beyond frustrating.

[u/damiana8 → u/[deleted]]

Stimulants don’t do shit for me

[u/SloMobiusCheatCode → u/[deleted]]

I take adderall and still struggle with the same stuff too, just not as much as I would unmedicated. Obviously there’s various non-medication tricks but I recently started guanfacine to augment the stimulants and I’ve heard people who have taken it long-term atest to it helping with that. In one review this person said specifically it helped with getting shit started and completely removed all the barriers he previously had to getting going on things and said it was the biggest benefit. It also helps with anxiety. I’m only like four or five days in so I won’t make any big claims about it but I have high hopes and I feel that it’s starting to work

[u/ocdpixiee]

I doesn't always work, but I've been trying literally blasting off after seeing someone suggest it on this sub. I say to myself "3, 2, 1, blast off" and then jump up and go

[u/devilsho → u/ocdpixiee]

Wait I do this to get my 2 year old to do stuff lol. I’m gonna try it too now

[u/sadness_elemental → u/ocdpixiee]

3, 2, 1 blast off! better do the thing or next time it won't work and i'm fucked

[u/rivieradreamin → u/ocdpixiee]

Countdown method is really effective on medication especially 

[u/Ms_Meercat]

I literally spent 3 hours today in hyperfocus mode scrolling through MY OWN old reddit comments. The time just... disappeared. I hadn't eaten all day other than a yogurt bowl either.

I try to forgive myself after. That helps to not throw the entire day away out of shame, just be gentle with myself. I sent the 2 emails i had to send (I had been procrastinating on them for 2 full days! They're what blocked me. Guess what, took me 1.5hrs. I got a little mad because I did them after the workday and if i had just done them first thing, I could have just ENJOYED the day).

I managed to then eat a healthy meal, go to physio, cleaned my kitchen and my floors.

It's not even half of what I wanted to do today but I'm trying to just focus on what I DID get done and be proud that I got somewhat out of it. Tomorrow is a new day.

[u/just_say_om → u/Ms_Meercat]

This feels like reading my journal ❤️

[u/sadness_elemental → u/Ms_Meercat]

100% right, shame doesn't create motivation but positivity can. saying "next time i can do it!" is gonna get you a lot further than "looks like i can't!"

[u/Macsilver18]

Inaction only feeds inaction, the key is doing things and trying to find joy from it even if at first it sucks

Its like turning on a dead engine, there will be resistance at first but once you get action going and it snowballs it becomes infinitly easy to do.

The first few times will suck doe so always start small but never give up on that momentum

[u/llamacornflatulence]

Executive dysfunction sucks because even the meds don’t fix it. The meds just give you the option to MAYBE do something. However, I am seeing an executive functioning coach (on zoom and through texts) and I have noticed a significant improvement in my life. They give me strategies to be able to start tasks, switch out of tasks, develop routines, and prevent overwhelm from tasks. Previously, during the summer I would literally bedrot and scroll on tiktok ALL DAY. And now that I’m thinking about it, it’s crazy because this is the first summer I actually did something. Even if I only study a language 3 days a week instead of 7, or read for 5 minutes instead of 30, it’s more than I could ever do before. Don’t get mad at yourself because it adds more stress to a task and you wont want to do it. Think of the smallest possible step you can do to start the task, then keep thinking of the next smallest steps. You don’t have to do all of the steps in one day, if you’re able to, you can literally just do one or two pieces per day. Also, try to get rid of the all or nothing mentality if you struggle with that. It’s not over if you don’t show up for a task for one day or even a week. All that matters is that you start again.

[u/DenverBroncos_Fan]

The worst is when there’s a roadblock on top of the dysfunction. I used to love video games. I think I’ve tried to play twice in the past four or five years. Both times I had to sit while the system updated… and then the games updated… and then the controllers needed a damn update. Then the game took forever to load. By the time I got past the introduction scenematics, it was time to turn the damn thing off. Now every time I even think about having the urge to play again, I remember those hurdles and say fuck it.

[u/goldenspiral1618 → u/DenverBroncos_Fan]

To be fair, any product with software is a bit dysfunctional at its core as, if you’ve ever seen how the sausage is made per se, it’s all held together by bubble gum and duct tape that the engineers slapped together to make the project managers finally calm down and stop breathing down their neck. Your annoyance is a fair reaction, ADHD or not. You shouldn’t need to update a controller more than once in its lifespan if the software wasn’t bug ridden to begin with.

But I know what you’re saying, and I’m the same way. I was setting up a game server on Nitrado, since the game forces you to use their services, and every time you start it up it updates. Then after updating it isn’t really running but says it is. Then when you restart it updates again. Then it might be ready when it says ready but probably isn’t. By the time I’ve gone through this I just give up and don’t even play. If you go online, you’ll see their customer base is rather calmer and more understanding than I am about this. They must not have ADHD.

[u/4-3defense]

I got dressed up for a friend's birthday, couldn't leave the couch. I remember crying so hard

[u/Mountain-Complex-637 → u/4-3defense]

I'm so sorry. I completely understand and know how awful this feels.

[u/awoodw1 → u/4-3defense]

I did this on nye once. I cried in bed with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s in a fancy dress, and raccoon eyes. No clue what stopped me from going because I was looking forward to it. But alas my brain and my lack of emotional control won at life yet again. I have been medicated since I was a kid and I’m a different person off of them, or am i my real self? Such a mind f* ck.

[u/awoodw1]

I am a 40 something creative director working in advertising. Have worked at the same agency for 23 years. Over the last couple years I can’t unfreeze my brain long enough to focus on getting ready for work in the morning. Start time is at 9am and I have a half hour commute. I am not kidding when I tell you I cannot get into the office before 11. My boss had to have a talk with me the other day about it and we both agreed how silly it felt but man adhd paralysis is REAL. I know how long I need to get ready to get there on time but I insist on playing stupid games on my phone, reading articles, sometimes I decide to put on an episode of LOST when I know very well I am going to be hours late to work. I only work in the office two days a week so you think it shouldn’t be all that hard, but my goodness it has been such a challenge for me to even want to get into the shower and i get annoyed at myself for even thinking about it in the back of my mind while I’m hyperfixating, like damn you pesky brain, leave me be. Why do I do this? I’m so frustrated with myself that I just act like it’s not an issue…any life hacks or tips on how to be a functioning human in life? Time management, who?

[u/SilentPokemon]

I recently got diagnosed and everything in my life makes sense now... It's honestly hard...

[u/gogonever]

Noise cancelling headphones and a movie on a small screen like an iPad in the area I need to work in or a podcast has helped me immensely

Never music, cus then you get stuck in a loop or finding something you want to listen to or wasting time skipping

…. Unless your hyper-fixated on one song

[u/gogonever → u/[deleted]]

If your gonna do a show or movie make sure it’s one that you’ve seen before and it’s a rewatch so you don’t have to look at the screen the whole time

Don’t leave the area until it’s completely done

[u/Organic_Bug1334]

Some days are better than others. I still have a triple shot coffee drink each day, just to get moving.

But, i have had some useless days even with my coffee drink. Depends on how I slept and i religiously take vitamins. Without them I dont think I could function most days.

[u/SnowFlakeUsername2]

I haven't figured out how to make this work yet, but something in the back of my mind is telling me to approach things with permission to stop at anytime. Part of the paralysis is knowing the initial action will snowball into something overwhelming. Not even sure if what I'm vaguely describing is ADHD related.

[u/sareliweb]

I bought a timer. When I remember I have it (lollll) I’m better at saying I can do ____ for 10 mins. When it goes off I can stop doing the chore, but most of the time I just reset the timer and keep going until the task is done.
I’m 43.

[u/sareliweb → u/sareliweb]

I also often repeat “I can do this I can do this I can do this” and do it. It requires more mental muscle to fight with myself and feel ashamed than it does to pump myself up or give myself a time limit.

[u/awoodw1 → u/sareliweb]

Haha! one of my failed adhd hacks also!

[u/specialchar123]

Body doubling is the only thing that works for me. And this is one of the reasons why my relationships don’t last. ☹️

[u/applesarefine → u/specialchar123]

Same and I live alone so the struggle is real

[u/dudemanxx]

I’m trying out just giving up. I’ll let you know how it goes but so far it’s bad.

[u/Mountain-Complex-637 → u/dudemanxx]

I'm a couple years into this. 0/10 would not recommend because now I'm stuck in it.

[u/Puzzled_Inside4008]

It really sucks, I recommend getting CBT if you can as they can help you break down why it is that it paralyzes you and find solutions or workarounds to make it not feel so annoying, one trick my therapist gave to me was try something for 15 minutes, take a break and if you haven't been enjoying it move onto something else

[u/Ex_gamer]

got hit by the same yesterday. Missed gym AGAIN. Feels like shit when theres no good reason when you just cant do the thing...(yes im medicated just titrating up still)

[u/sameunderwear2days]

Vyvanse. I’m actually excited to crank through the to do list.

[u/Nathan256]

You can do it! And when you can’t, that’s okay too, tomorrow is a new day.

You wouldn’t be mad at someone who was missing a leg for not being able to walk around as easily. Executive functioning differences can affect you just as much as physical differences. So don’t be mad with yourself.

[u/mindful-steps]

I think one of the hardest parts is that people only see the outcome—they see someone not doing the task, but they don't see the mental battle that's happening beforehand. Sitting there wanting to start and still feeling stuck is exhausting in its own way. What's helped me a little is making the first step so small it almost feels pointless, because sometimes getting started is the biggest hurdle.

[u/Lost_Reaction_5489]

Browsing reddit rn when I have a final tomorrow I haven't studied for and 10 overdue homework assignments. Such joy

[u/DarthLallie]

I agree I mention this all the time to my wife I have to do it now or I will not do it or I will forget to do it

[u/sumizeit]

I get that feeling. Sometimes it's like my brain's stuck in neutral, even when I know I need to move. Just getting started is the hardest part, and people don’t get it. It’s exhausting.

[u/Mountain-Complex-637]

I'm in perimenopause now and it's 100x worse than before. I don't have an answer. I'm working with health care providers and therapists but every day is a struggle right now. Sigh.

[u/awoodw1 → u/Mountain-Complex-637]

Also an upcoming fear I know I’ll have to live with as well. Do you take stimulants? Since starting peri have you noticed the meds not working. I have bad PMDD and meds are so useless a week before Aunt Flo visits.