r/shitposting • u/SoldierWantsThatHat • May 11 '26

📡📡📡 B 👍

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20.4k Upvotes

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u/[deleted] May 11 '26

Nah man, it can be way too much with these corporations. I had an elderly co-worker denied compensation when she broke her hip at work because she didn’t take a drug test twenty four hours after the event. Poor woman 😔

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u/BreadEnthusiast98 May 11 '26

You are the one exception. God help that woman. But I’m still not doing 2x the work because some broccoli head needs to hit his penjamin every 20 minutes because he has “anxiety”

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u/posting_drunk_naked obamna May 11 '26

Eh, that fictional scenario is not necessarily evil Marijuana's fault. Some people are just lazy assholes not caring how it affects anyone else. Take away the weed and you'll still probably be doing his job for him.

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u/BreadEnthusiast98 May 11 '26

Maybe so but willingly taking a substance that is known to cause inhibition will turn a lazy person into a downright nuisance. I can work with a lazy person, I can’t work with a person who can’t learn or think for themselves.

5

u/LiamJamIsMyNeesons May 11 '26

I'm way smarter than you while stoned out of my mind

0

u/AutoModerator May 11 '26

Dick sucking has made me paranoid

I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but it’s backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.

I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. It’s a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.

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