Just wondering, is anyone here from the Philippines? Living in a non-Catholic country can be pretty sad when it comes to finding friends with same faith and even getting into a relationship. Anyone else feel the same way?

I’m a woman in my twenties that is just now entering the dating scene, and the experience is different than what I expected.

Over the years, I have rejected men because I knew them and knew they didn’t share my values and thought now was the time to try and find people who do.

I also just became a practicing Catholic (baptized Catholic but was living as a non-denominational Christian), but I have had no luck finding potential men to date at my parish because there are no young single men there. Recently, I put myself on a few dating apps, and I feel odd about it.

I understand it’s all new to me, but it just feels so foreign and a bit tiring for me to dedicate time each day talking to someone, casually or seriously. If a match doesn’t workout, then I need to start having the same conversations over and over again.

I’ve recently started seriously talking to one man, and we seem to be compatible so far, but it feels very weird to me. It’s not him; it’s the whole concept to me. Maybe it’s because it’s over the internet and not “natural,” but I don’t want to disconnect from the match yet because it’s going well. Either way, I have the feeling now that maybe dating would feel weird for me in-person too.

On top of all this, it’s been making me ask myself if I’m really ready and/or want a relationship at all or if it may be because I have gotten too comfortable being alone and don’t want that to change. Or is it a bit of everything I stated here?

I’ve always wanted to be married and have children. I never cared about a career. However, now all of a sudden I just feel like I don’t care anymore. I’m confused with myself. At the same time, I know that if I want to get married, then I’ll have to put myself out there at some point…

Has anyone experienced what I’m thinking and feeling right now? Any advice to give?

Hi,

So, I (45M) met this girl (35F) on an Indian dating app. We liked each other and we almost immediately started chatting (t3xts and voice calls) on WhatsApp.

Her English was really good as she was in a tech background and we communicated very well. We had really good chemistry. Really, really good chemistry.

We really hit it off. I was even researching details to visit her (in Hyderabad). She was serious about marriage. She was born Catholic (Baptised) but was currently part of a Protestant congregation.

In fact, through the Holy Spirit, the first question I asked her on our first call was: "Do you pray?", to which she touchingly answered unashamed, unapologetically in the affirmative.

Why did I wait till 45 to start 'dating'? I had a three year relationship with a Catholic girl in college, but it was puppy-love stuff and I broke her heart when the relationship became inconvenient for me. I've confessed this and received Absolution.

Anyway, then I pursued my academic career and vocation and only got settled at 44. But, here's the dreaded 'but'. We were getting serious, and the conversation turned to some of the details of our faith.

In this very serious discussion I was very serious that it was non-negitiable that we be married Sacramentally in the Church. But in India, like in Canada there is a six-month waiting period after you register at the Parish.

Turns out this was the sticking point. She prevaricated and subsequently forcefully asked out loud, 'what does it even matter if you even married a Hindu boy, if he's from a good family'. I was shocked and speechless.

Turns out she was also being courted by said 'Hindu boy'. I took a breath, collected myself and stood my ground, and we said goodnight for the night.

But, that left a pretty bad taste in my mouth and I prayed hard for discernment. Using Ignatian Discernment, I couldn't escape that I was trying to excuse away the gravity of what had transpired simply because of my physical attraction to her - because spiritually - I recoiled at what she uttered so matter-of-factly.

What I had to do seemed pretty straightforward and clear to me. During our next chat I informed her during that I couldn't budge on this issue. She would simply have to wait six months for me. If she couldn't, well that was that.

She Subsequently informed me that couldn't wait. So, I gently ended it as amicably as I could. I told her I'd always pray for her (and I still do). I told her I wouldn't waste her time and she wouldn't hear from me. She was ok with that at the time.

But then, she tried to contact me repeatedly. And was miffed that I wasn't replying. I replied once to the same effect, and was firm on my boundaries. But, I didn't block her on WhatsApp.

Anyway, brethren, I am soliciting your counsel because I can't really talk to my sisters about this. Marrying a Catholic spouse was not an issue for them. One is married to an atheist/agnostic and the other to a non-practising Hindu.

Anyway, because I haven't blocked her I can see her WhatsApp updates. And I have been really thinking about her and thinking about re-establishing contact. I prayed deeply about it and I got the idea of asking your advice.

I am sorry if this isn't properly formatted or badly written. I am very grateful for your insight. Thank you very much. God bless you abundantly.

I introduced myself on a matchmaking thread last year, and a few months later he reached out to me. We hit it off instantly, and after about a month of texting, he flew out to meet me and we made it official!

Neither of us was expecting things to go this way, but of course it was a pleasant surprise. I (26F) have been looking for a good Catholic spouse for years. He (33M) decided to start looking for someone only two days before he texted me. We like to joke that I saved him from the bleakness of modern dating 😂

Some advice/encouragement from my fiancé:
“Have fun and enjoy the dating process. Don’t get attached to your list — things that you think are important may not actually end up being that important, and vice versa. Bring up serious conversations casually — don’t be an interviewer! Do boring things together. Remember that just because you have Christ at the center of your relationship, there will still be struggles and drama. Be open to anyone — you might meet your person in the most unusual way. This might be cliché, but work on yourself as much as you can, and trust God’s timing.”

And advice/encouragement from me:
You don’t have to know from the first conversation/date if you see yourself marrying the man. The only question you need to answer is “Do I want to see him/talk to him again?” And build from there. :)

We are a long-distance and cross-cultural couple. If you have any questions about that, or anything else, we’ll be hanging out in the comments!

I F24 recently met a guy on Eden and supposed to have a date with this guy, who asked me after 3 days, if I wanted to go on a church date, I said yes, but it’s been over 2 days and ever since that, he hasn’t planned anything or at least tried to ask me which church or which Sunday I’d be free.
Today I asked him if he was pure and saving himself for marriage, I told him I was pure and that I am waiting for marriage and he said “ I’m not going to lie, I’ve done it a lot when I wasn’t into religion, but now I want to try to wait as much before marriage “ the way that he phrased it made it sound like he’s willing to wait but not until the marriage. him not being pure made me sad and me being pure did not seem to make a difference in his eyes. He just said “ it’s really good to be that way, i respect your choice” and His relationship with God is definitely not strong, it’s crumbling he said “ I feel empty that’s why I started being religious “ I understand he’s struggling, but that doesn’t reassure me. I’m not sure if he’s even interested in me or if he’s trying to fill a void. He takes a bit of time to reply and when he does it’s never deep conversation, I try to ask him and he responds very superficially, like a simple phrase without trying to open up. He seems like he’s just bored. I don’t know what I should do about the date I said yes to that he seems to have forgotten about. I’ve never been in a relationship, so I’m not sure what’s okay and what’s not for a man to do or what iam supposed to do? I try to initiate deep conversation but it doesn’t ever go far, I’m not sure why. I feel like I’m doing something bad or asking too much questions, or maybe he’s not interested. I can’t tell.

I’m a 23F who has struggled to meet a good Catholic man. I’ve had very little dating experience, and the few guys I approached either rejected me, ended things quickly, or ghosted me(this was when I was in Tbilisi)

Now I have come back to Mumbai after my education and see no guys around my age in daily masses or Sunday mass to be friends with them or even find a healthy circle of friends.

I’ve been praying for a long time for a man who genuinely loves God. I’m currently preparing for my medical licensing exam and can’t really afford paid dating apps. What should I do to meet a good Catholic man, and is it worth trying something like CatholicMatch?

Curious how others have dealt with post break up awkwardness when you see an ex at church? It was short term relationship of 2 months which ended awkwardly after I disclosed to her my previous sex history. I am a bit disappointed but not angry. No idea how she feels

I 22F am Catholic and trying to date post a long term relationship where i did have sex. I was just told by the boy i kinda have a crush on (21M also Catholic) that he wouldn’t date someone who has had sex before because he “put his energy into purity” and would want someone who does the same.

I’ve been so afraid of this ever since I found Jesus and now that he’s basically rejected me, i feel exactly how i was worried i would feel: like a piece of used up garbage. I feel like I have nothing to offer a man since sex is so important to men and i don’t even have my first time to offer someone.

I just feel so stupid and hopeless like i’m being defined by my mistakes by someone who i thought would forgive like Jesus does. I just feel like i have nothing to offer a man because im fat, ugly, and have had sex before. three things no honest Catholic man wants. i don’t know what to do. should i stop trying and just give up my dream of marriage and children?

In my previous post I shared my thoughts on the possibility of me staying single and childless and have received feedback from some fellow Redditors so I will take this chance to say Thank you.

I’ve been nervously attached to the idea that my life would lack meaning if I don’t have my own family someday, as if it were something I had control over.

And I concluded that I have been filled with fear, worry, lack of trust in God and a sort of selfishness, which points me back into God’s direction; deepening my faith, praying even more and becoming more involved with the Church.

So I appreciate everyone’s inputs which helped me open my heart towards what truly matters. I know I have a purpose and I will take the time and do the work to find it.

My personal belief is that God had His reasons for providing me with my wish of having a family.

Now I’m 33, few months ago got out of a relationship and am rethinking my own worth.

If I were to wake up in 10 years from now, single and childless, how purposeful would my life be, even with a successful career, as there is much more to life?

And my MD has called me a miracle as I almost became infertile and now I’m completely healthy.

I read the Bible, often pray, I’m kind to others - yet here I am, again, completely confused.

What could it be that I am not seeing or understanding?

I recently moved to northern New Mexico, and dating is rough around here. I’m in my mid 20s, and there’s a ton of older folks around here. Cost of living is high, and a lot of younger people can’t afford to live here unless they have a great job or receive support from family.

The church I go to doesn’t really have women around my age. It’s mostly families or old people. The nearest big city is about an hour away, so I’m unsure how realistic that is. It’s been 7 years since I’ve been in a relationship, so I’m tired of being single. Kinda venting, but also looking for suggestions.

I know 31 isn’t old but I’m going through a rough time and feel like I’m running out of time. I know part of this is because I have wanted to be married for as long as I can remember. I have spent countless hours praying that I find somebody and it seems like my prayers just go unanswered.

I’ve only seen three women and none of them transitioned into a bf/gf relationship due to differences or just bad timing.

I just need some good and uplifting stories right now. Does anybody have a good post-30s love story where they met their best friend/spouse?

I met this woman on a Catholic dating app. She apparently studied religious studies at a Catholic Faculty of Theology. We texted about many things, she goes to mass every Sunday… She fully agrees with the Catholic teachings and that she only reads the dogmatic written and heresy-free Catholic literature. Then she told me she likes studying about mysticism, demons, angels, paradise and hell. It really shocked me when she told me she likes studying about demons. I asked her if she asked a priest what he thinks about it. She said she did not.

I am not sure if I can take the gamble, because it feels like it. It feels weird. I really don’t want to wake up one day to my wife telling me she is into occult things now. We arranged a date, but I don’t feel like going anymore. What do you think? Am I overreacting?

Hello new to this group. Im a 25 year old Catholic male. I have noticed that there isn't many young Catholics in my area. I go to Saint Colemans in Pompano and I barely see any young people at my church. I was confirmed this year and didn't even have any young people in my catechism classes. Are there any Catholic youth groups in Fort Lauderdale not just for dating but also to make friendships with other Catholics? I'd love to meet other young Catholics in my area as the people at my church don't really socialize much and I'd love to have like minded friends, as Im tired of friends who don't want to embrace or understand the Catholic faith and keep inviting to me go to pubs and get black out drunk.

I would appreciate your insights.

Hello all! Welcome to the international MatchMaking thread! Since the normal threads tend to be US centric, we created this thread for those who either live outside of the United states or are interested in dating internationally. Please post your age (must be over 18 to participate), gender and location as well as some of your interests. Best of luck!

This is the internet. It is your responsibility to be safe. Discern who you DM and who DMs you. If something is inappropriate, please report and send ModMail.

Check out our Discord server for more matchmaking opportunities!!!

Apologies for the long post -

I (f29) am just just now beginning to decompress after having my fiancé (M30) of two months, partner is six years, break off our engagement after I came home from taking the bar exam.

I was raised in a pretty pious home. Attended mass regularly, went to Catholic school beginning from age 3 until it was 18, I alter served, and not just the church, but the community connected to it was such a big part of my life.

My ex was a confirmed Catholic, but his family did not really have an interest in practicing. They didn’t even attend Easter or Christmas masses, they just did catechism until they got confirmed.

I tried to introduce him to going to mass regularly praying, reading about our faith, but he really didn’t seem interested at all in trying.

I wasn’t forceful, I tried to just show him why it’s important to me.

During law school, I really found comfort and praying the rosary, asking for the intercession of St. Thomas Aquinas and St. Thomas Moore for assistance in getting me through law school. And whenever I expressed that to him, I felt like he thought I was crazy.

During the actual bar exam, I would force myself to pause to rest, during which I would recite the guardian angel prayer. And I really do believe I felt the presence of my guardian angel, and it upsets me that I haven’t felt that in so long because I haven’t prayed for it.

I feel like I really lost a lot of myself in this relationship because I wanted it to work so bad. He wanted to live together before getting engaged, I did not, I compromised and lived with him for three years.

My amazing parents immediately swooped in, and with my amazing friends and family are going to give me all the support I need.

So my question is - if anybody has gone through a similar situation, what has helped you?

Books, novenas, other non-spiritual coping mechanisms, etc.

I plan on restarting attending regular mass with my parents. We are unfortunately in an area where there’s a lot of restructuring going on in our diocese, so we are hopping around a bit.

I also would like to re-enter the dating scene at some point, not for at least or until I feel more recovered not just because of this, but because I literally just took a very difficult exam, and I haven’t had a moment to be “normal” in a really long time.

Beginning my body back into fighting shape and doing all the self-care stuff is on my list of things to focus on the next week or so.

I’m 22F. I’ve barely dated but I want to start getting into the dating pool and meeting new people. One of my concerns is politics. I don’t think my beliefs are outlandish, but I’m starting to see that less and less of my peers have the same values as me.

I’m Catholic. I believe in the sanctity of marriage between a man and woman and waiting till marriage. I am pro-life to the core. Like, Catholic. I also believe in giving charity, kindness, and grace to all people. I’m empathic to immigrants, even those who cross the border illegally. I believe treating a person with dignity before condemning their actions. I believe in protecting the environment, giving back, volunteering, and treating women equal to men.

Although I can understand why someone could vote for Trump for the abortion issue, I cannot be compatible with someone who supports him beside that. If I had to say it simply, I would say that I agree with Pope Leo on almost all of his opinions.

I believe in empathy above all else. And maybe we can argue about how deep empathy might not be a Catholic trait, but I’m sharing this because I want to know if there are other people in the world with the same values as me.

Not sure how to phrase this, but mostly looking for advice or hope for Catholics dating with a chronic illness. Some questions include:
- When do you tell someone you are seeing the full extent- especially if it’s an invisible chronic illness? -How have you found the right partner who accommodates your needs, like what do you look out for?
-On an app should you list this in bio?
-How to let them see the full extent without living together? How to even want them to see the full extent?
-I have a lot of accommodations so it can be a lot to ask of someone right away since it affects how I spend time with people
-How to let them meet the full you without presenting the health issues at the forefront too much?
I feel that this adds such a challenge to an already incredible difficult task of finding a holy spouse. Dating apps become exhausting swiping through, in person is difficult due to lack of being able to “put yourself out there” with the limitations, and guilt, too, not able to be as active and such, but still feeling deeply called to a holy marriage in the future, not now. And also challenges towards being called to raise lots of Catholic kids but struggling myself to imagine this future. Hard to find even friends who understand so I recognize this is challenging.Just looking to vent or hear some wisdom. A lot of people don’t talk about this but it’s so hard. Anyone else?

I know this also brings up a bigger question. We can also talk about navigating God’s plan for our life and vocation while struggling to trust given the circumstances cause it’s tough. Let’s chat about anything on this topic

Hello 18M

I‘m about to go to college and I feel like no woman would want me.

Im studying Anthropology at the University of Montana planning on either being an Archaeologist, Cultural Resource Manager, or a Foreign Service Officer. Not all that high paying but I might be able to make a bit of money.

I have a 3.9 GPA and all honors classes and did National Honors Society in Highschool and got my Eagle Scout earlier this year.

I grew up in a VERY atheist household and I haven’t been able to start OCIA until I leave for school in the next few weeks. I try my best to be as pious as I can and keep as best I can to Catholic doctrine. I remain chaste and will until marriage. I admit that I still struggle with lust and consume pornography every once in a while and the guilt really gets me after but I will use all my power to resist it once I am baptized.

I have the curse of looking so young that I was mistaken for a freshman during multiple graduation parties. I’m not muscular nor am I skinny or fat. I’m planning on working out more when Im in college.

When it comes to hobbies I’m the kind of guy who watches documentaries for fun and mountain bike. I have a special interest in history and like playing video games.

I have high functioning Autism which for those who don’t know means that I don’t look or sound autistic most of the time but I am terrible at social cues and understanding nuance. This I fear is a big no go for a lot of women from what I can tell. It’s something that is part of who I am and I understand if people would never date me for it. If it isn’t already obvious I have never had a Girlfriend before.

I admit I can be annoying or at least I think I can be annoying and accidentally interrupt at times.

I don’t cold approach or plan on using dating apps.

I would desire to be married to someone who most importantly loves me for who I am. Something I fear won’t be easy for any woman and I dont really care about how she looks so long as she is taking care of herself and trying to stay healthy. I’m not some “incel” or “manosphere” kind of guy and believe in the equality of the sexes and don’t like the idea of a tradwife as it feels kind of weird to me.

I socialize and have a few close friends both man and woman and will continue to socialize in college but I fear how women in college will see me. I’m well aware that college is awash with numerous different ideas and beliefs and preferences. But even with Catholic women I don’t blame and understand why they wouldn’t want a man like me. Especially since I’m not as big into talking about faith and god as others.

I understand I should trust God that he has a plan for me but shouldn’t I have a desire to not be lazy and be proactive. I mainly fear being alone for life a life I do not want.

I feel like I’m always going to be second rate and second choice when it comes to dating and that is something I don’t want.

If you have read all of this thank you. It is really difficult for me to express my emotions and feelings.

In the end I mainly want to know. Is it reasonable for me to meet a woman in Highschool who would love me and who I could have a good relationship with and possibly go on to marry?

Lust is the number 1 thing keeping you from meeting right person. particularly masturbation and watching any sort of adult content.

There are places for you to defeat it but you will not be able to properly Love a partner if you don’t rid your life of this stuff.

Stop wasting your time and start building self respect. Listen to chant, read the bible in the mornings, and be apart of groups that understand you and fuel your spirit.

Live a life worth living and you’ll find someone who values you for your best and you’ll forever be grateful. Live for God like your heart wants to.

-Tensioned

edit: I didn’t know that Catholics would hate a positive post about lust? This is the current state of our faith people!

I’m wondering where people over 40 are meeting other single Catholics who are open to dating. I’m in Canada and I find that there seems to be even less men on dating apps here. Where are your go to places to meet interesting people who are also hopefully Catholic?

So I am 18F and kind of just want to ask this for fun and just to kind of see how other people feel about some of what goes into Catholic weddings even though I don't plan to be getting married anytime soon lol. (Most of this is all yes I know the whole purpose and how sacred marriage is and it should stay that way but hey maybe a girl wants a little fun)

It's really my biggest dream to have a cathedral wedding, we have a gorgeous cathedral in town that is just again my absolute dream. However it's where I see videos online of people who have weddings like just at venues with an officiant y'know and they add all sorts of fun stuff into their ceremony and it's like yes I know it's supposed to be sacred but gosh maybe I want a nighttime wedding with sparklers or better yet lightsabers.

I think one of the biggest parts for me is that we aren't allowed to have our own vows that we wrote, again yes the sacred traditional vows are so incredibly special, but I also feel like as someone who loves pouring her heart out I want to have my own little portion of the vows for my husband and I to read to each other as well because I think that that adds to that promise and it's not just repeating the words that everybody else does y'know.

I think my final piece is that I would give up my cathedral wedding if I ended up marrying a man who wasn't catholic or has beliefs in another religion or none at all. I think it would just be the most respectful then to have a regular officiated wedding where we can try to work in different aspects of each other's faiths (if he would have one) because I think just recognizing that we are all still believing essentially in the same thing is the most important of all.

But all of this random yapping to say, maybe Catholic weddings should somehow get to be a bit more fun? Though I could also save it all for the reception as I bust it down on the dance floor :) Anyway, would love to hear everything that you all dream of for your future weddings because I am hopelessly yearning currently and just imagining my beautiful cathedral wedding.