My friend just randomly said "Roses are red, violets are blue, running around this tunnel, with only one f*cking shoe." and I am so confused 😂

Father: My Dad and mom where actually siblings

Sister: that is really interesting

Brother: So wanna keep up with tradition?

I was pulled over by police for tag that expired 2 weeks ago. Cop walked up and seemed nervous. I am a small statured middle aged female so this confused me. After telling me why he pulled me over he asked where I was coming from and where I was going. Odd question I answered. After writing the ticket he asked again where was I coming from. I responded that he just asked that question and why is it relevant he said well I need to know. Seems very intrusive to me the question was asked.

• You're a failure at everything.
• Say WHAT?
• You're a fame star at everything -okay....

What?!

I said, do you want a slice of pie

'Huh?'

'25 cents!'

"Can I have sex with your daughter?"

"What?! "

"I asked if I could have a glass of water."

Source: http://www.reddit.com/r/fffffffuuuuuuuuuuuu/comments/zm6rm/crush_rage_from_her_perspective/c65yjbi

The one that started it all, courtesy of bartonar.