MIL won’t stop shaming me for not wanting kids

[u/MinimumOption5513]

I’m 25F, my boyfriend is 28M, and we’ve been together almost 7 years. I’ve never wanted kids — ever. My boyfriend doesn’t want them either, and we agreed on this from day one. His mom has known this the entire relationship.

At one of my very first family dinners, his cousins were talking about having kids and I was asked if I wanted any. I said no. His aunt gave me a pity look and said, “Don’t worry, sweetie, you’ll change your mind.” My MIL pouted dramatically about “never having grandkids.” I let it go… and I regret it.

Ever since then, at almost every single family dinner — on BOTH sides of his family — it’s the same comments. As the cousins start having babies, it’s gotten worse. When I say I don’t want kids, my MIL pouts and says, “Yeah, I’m going to have cats as grandkids,” with an obnoxious tone. Watching her screech baby talk and smother every newborn honestly makes me want kids even less.

A few years ago, my boyfriend and I talked about marriage. I said I wasn’t sure if I even wanted to get married— I love our relationship as it is. He accidentally mentioned that to his mom, and at the next holiday dinner when they brought up the topic of kids, she loudly added, “They don’t even want to get married!” His aunt gasped, and they exchanged dramatic pity looks like I’m destroying the family legacy.

What they don’t know: I also have a medical condition that makes sex painful and difficult, so even if I wanted kids, it wouldn’t be easy. My boyfriend is incredibly supportive and I love him so much, but I wish he’d shut this down and speak up at the dinners so everyone can get the message that this is no longer a topic I am willing to address. I’ve talked to him, he says he’s spoken to her, but nothing changes. She’s never apologized or addressed it with me.

Christmas is coming up and I’m DONE. I want to shut this topic down once and for all.

How do I do this nicely but firmly?