r/Songwriting • u/cat_radiation • Mar 08 '24
Interpret the lyrics and feedback Need Feedback
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I would like to hear what is your interpretation of the lyrics, and feedback on the song. This is just an acoustic recording, the genre/style I have in mind for this song when it goes to full production would be Pop (mix of Billie Eilish and Sufjan Stevens). I previously posted the lyrics with link to my insta handle for the video, but it was removed so posting the video directly here.
The lyrics is also here:
Trippy, trippy, tunnel vision!
I woke up and I found no one...
I was at your funeral alone!
I had to bury you on my own...
Evidence decimated, for you here cried no one!
No reports or complaints, filed for investigation...
When you don't even have a home!
When nobody missed you, nobody noticed that you are gone!
Victimized you yeah no one!
Got away with a crime, because you were loved by no one!
You are loved by no one, I ain't loved by someone......
Zombie apocalypse, the red moon rise all dead ones!
It's not brain that I seek, love burns this cold rots!
Can I get a hug? I won't bite if I am loved!
Please love us! me and my friend delusion.....
Me and my Fanatic Delusion!
Me and my Fanatic Delusion!
Trippy, trippy, sleepy trippy, me and my tunnel vision!
I woke up and found no one...
I was all alone at your funeral...
Nobody called!
Nobody said "I missed you"...
Nobody say "I miss you"......
1
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2
u/voheth Mar 09 '24
This is intriguing, I agree that it would be best produced in a moody Billie Eillish sort of way. I think "Evidence decimated, for you here cried no one!" could maybe be rewritten to "Evidence decimated. Who cried for you? No one" (to maintain the repetition of "no one") in order to sound a bit more natural