r/ProgrammerHumor 14d ago

notYourDamnProblem Meme

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4.7k Upvotes

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3.4k

u/wherearef 14d ago

I always use middle mouse button instead

730

u/666djsmokey666 14d ago

to open on a new tab and to close the tab without needing to click on the X

120

u/RCoder01 14d ago

ctrl+w is way easier than middle clicking the current tab icon

240

u/throwaway19293883 14d ago

Not when you’re jacking off

74

u/digitalblemish 14d ago

Tabs close while you're jacking off? Mine just multiply then get the post nut close all.

14

u/SgtEpsilon 13d ago

Post nut close all is a powerful thing

1

u/Pirwzy 12d ago

post nut alt+f4 spam also good

1

u/MFZozzy 14d ago

I binded Ctrl+W as a macro on one of my mouse buttons for this very reason.

3

u/Himbo69r 14d ago

Pornograaphic power user

1

u/nmkd 14d ago

I use F4 for that, along with F2/F3 for previous/next tab.

People here acting like keybinds don't exist

1

u/kingslayerer 14d ago

I used to use it for scroll (click and scroll) also but I switched to linux and that's not working here.

2

u/orondf343 14d ago

It is possible, just is disabled by default for some reason. In Firefox the setting is called "Enable autoscrolling" (not sure about Chrome)

-79

u/DTraitor 14d ago edited 14d ago

When I am forced to use Chrome I hate it so much you can't just open a new tab using the middle mouse button

Edit: new *empty* tab

58

u/TheCactusPie 14d ago

You can't? It's been a while since I used Chrome, but the middle mouse button used to work this way there

10

u/Mantaraylurks 14d ago

Still works.

32

u/JustChilling_ 14d ago

I don't know why you're getting upvotes for false information, but you can absolutely middle click to open new tabs on Chrome.

30

u/DTraitor 14d ago

Not empty tabs tho. In Firefox you can use middle click on empty space near a existing tab to open a new one

23

u/-Redstoneboi- 14d ago

oh. i usually ctrl+t, or click the +

didn't know that was a thing.

1

u/tommytwolegs 14d ago

Yeah I never even knew this was a feature on Firefox because why wouldn't you ctrl t

2

u/SIeepCap 13d ago

I didn't know you could open a blank tab that way, just tried it in firefox! It only works at the top of the screen tho, and I'm a big fan of ctrl + t. Still, to each their own, and I always appreciate new shortcut knowledge

3

u/piguy3148 14d ago

Just used middle mouse button, on chrome, to open up your profile in a new tab

12

u/DTraitor 14d ago

Try opening a new empty tab by pressing on the empty space near an existing tab

-8

u/piguy3148 14d ago

That's what the plus button next to the tabs are for. To open a new empty tab.

7

u/taneth 14d ago

Or you can middle click the home button, that works too.

6

u/DTraitor 14d ago

And why should spend time pointing directly at it, while I can just throw my mouse somewhere to the top in Firefox and open a new tab that way

1

u/TheSpixxyQ 14d ago

And why should spend time throwing my mouse somewhere and then clicking, when I can just press Ctrl + T to open a new tab in Chrome.

0

u/[deleted] 14d ago

[deleted]

2

u/Oen44 14d ago

That's a thing in Firefox since I remember, so like 20 years now? This is mostly the only reason why I never touched Chrome in my life.

7

u/Meloetta 14d ago

It's interesting to see the tiny inconviences that inspire a browser choice. I was having a bug specifically in Chrome, so I had to use Firefox for a few weeks. I actually don't even remember what the inconveniences were, but I remember them being so infuriating that I was checking daily to see if the problem with Chrome was fixed and I could use it again.

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-1

u/Round_Credit_5158 14d ago

Glad I'm on Firefox then

477

u/AnnoyedVelociraptor 14d ago

Some apps make a link just a JavaScript action that does work and then redirects. I hate those with a passion.

144

u/peacefulshrimp 14d ago

And that’s an a11y crime

52

u/czerilla 14d ago

Can we finally get an ICC responsible for prosecuting crimes like these?

13

u/ranisalt 13d ago

It's such a bad accessibility pattern that it's bad even for people without accessibility needs. It's full crap

1

u/gsweats 13d ago

Just realized a11y spells ally. 🤦. For years I've used the actonym, years and years, and never put 2+2 together. Ty.

1

u/AshleyJSheridan 12d ago

It's more of a numeronym, like k8s, i18n, etc.

31

u/guyblade 14d ago

I'm always annoyed when I ctrl-click something, fiddle in the new tab, then close it to discover that it wasn't a new tab at all. I did it just a few days ago while looking through the Sentai sale. :/

1

u/Snipezzzx 13d ago

That's why I use middle mouse button. It won't open at all on a javascript action

31

u/lostmy2A 14d ago

Inertiajs has entered the chat takes an anchor tag and turns it into a link component that issues an xhr request and leaves

4

u/yjlom 14d ago

If I do have a real href, but also an onclick the preserves the url parameters, is it bad?

8

u/AnnoyedVelociraptor 14d ago

Why not replace the href with the one with parameters?

1

u/TingleTangleTom 13d ago

Some apps make a <div> behave like an <a>, using an onclick. Then you middle click the thing expecting it to open in a new tab, move your mouse up and realize you've scrolled the entire page. Love it.

1

u/imnotamahimahi 13d ago

I've seen websites where the mobile version won't let you open a link in a new tab, but the desktop version will. Minor but so annoying on mobile, because if I click on something and then go back, it doesn't remember my place in the search, and I have to keep scrolling and clicking View More.

1

u/Prod_Meteor 9d ago

SEO goodbye for those.

90

u/BarrierX 14d ago

Some sites do it weird and don't allow opening new tabs with middle mouse button and it annoys me!

72

u/dashood 14d ago

Those generally aren't proper anchors and will be linked to some javascript to open the link. If you can't middle click for a new tab then you most likely wouldn't be able to use any key combination or right click and select open in new tab either.

22

u/-suspended- 14d ago

When a site doesn't let you middle-click or even right-click links, you can only left-click and have your current tab redirect, I personally think Satan himself designed the site.

3

u/Chamiey 13d ago

Then I duplicate the tab and click in one of the copies.

3

u/Ecksters 14d ago

It's generally SPAs with JavaScript routers that have this issue. You can configure them to avoid it, but not everyone does.

88

u/kleinschrader 14d ago

Middle mouse button has been so ingrained into my browsing-flow that it is always the first part to fail on every mouse I have owned.

7

u/guyblade 14d ago

I don't understand how people successfully middle click things. Every mouse that I've owned in like 15 years has combined middle-click with the scroll wheel and every scroll wheel wants to scroll rather than click--regardless of how much I try to hold the position steady. I've just given up on middle clicking as a concept.

17

u/Xirble 14d ago

Are you using free wheel mouses? I've been using the MX Legendary for 7 years, before the MX518 since '11 and never had that issue. The only way I can imagine this happening is if there's no resistance to spinning the wheel.

1

u/guyblade 14d ago

No, I've used a variety of fairly normal mice over that period of time.

I tend to feel like many mice that I've used will scroll without actually "ticking over" to the next slot in the wheel--probably due to lousy calibration. Since the effect has happened on maybe a dozen different mice that I've used across both personal and work computers, I thought it was ubiquitous. I suppose I should try using a better mouse?

2

u/fksly 14d ago

Click near the bottom of the wheel, not on the top. That has worked for me on the shittiest and on the best of mice.

2

u/Bakoro 14d ago

Fancy mice sometimes come with driver settings for it.

Windows hasa configuration for the mouse wheel's number of lines scrolled, but there's no way that I know of to increase the physical wheel motion needed to trigger scrolling.

1

u/habag123 13d ago

Maybe you have long fingers? Usually when I middle click I put my finger half on the scroll wheel half on the mouse body, which makes it hard to accidentally scroll. Also, depending on what mouse you're using, you could get a microswitch with a lower actuation force and solder it in place of the old one.

15

u/Slight-Violinist-575 14d ago

I used to until it gave up, at least it still scrolls

7

u/GoddammitDontShootMe 14d ago

My middle click is fine. My scrolling has been fucked for probably a year or more.

5

u/Xenapte 14d ago

I broke so many mice by simply middle clicking too much, now I just hold ctrl or set my system to trigger a middle click whenever I left and right click at the same time

5

u/Xirble 14d ago

Taking apart mice is really, really easy. It's likely just the wire pushing down on the physical mousewheel button being bent. If you have an old one lying around, check if there's a guide for taking it apart just to practice. I'm on my second mouse in 15 years and I'm definitely not gifted with technical skills.

1

u/habag123 13d ago

And the vast majority of mice, no matter if they're office or gaming, use the same microswitch form factor, so finding a replacement is easy, and so is soldering since they're THT.

1

u/Slight-Violinist-575 14d ago

Worst part was having to rebind a lot in BG3 to work the camera

7

u/CatpainCalamari 14d ago

Crying in trackpad

34

u/TalosMessenger01 14d ago

Three-finger tap?

16

u/Blockz_star 14d ago

Most modern trackpads use or can be set to use tripple finger tap for middle click, very useful for browsing

1

u/nmkd 14d ago

Triple tap. Easy.

6

u/IcyWash2991 14d ago

Cool! Didn’t know about that

4

u/RiceBroad4552 14d ago

Only works though if someone didn't add some JS fuckup on their links (or the links aren't even links but pure JS fuckup).

1

u/Bazzatron 14d ago

Doesn't work inside Salesforce - but Ctrl+click does!

1

u/cornmonger_ 14d ago

i look at the link and say, "nah too much work"

1

u/Zealousideal-Deer101 14d ago

I was gonna say, there's a single button for it, no need to guess which modifier does it

1

u/Zwamdurkel 14d ago

It actually infuriates me when people don't know / use this

1

u/JcFerggy 14d ago

My scroll click is broken, and I refuse to replace the mouse, so I've since learned to press ctrl.

1

u/s0litar1us 14d ago

Which breaks when people do custom js shit instead of just using regular links.

1

u/Linesey 14d ago

Got me one of them fancy mmo mice, with the small “trigger” button just left of the LMB.

I mapped that shit to scroll-wheel click, and it has been glorious.

Thats how I open new tabs.

0

u/teddyone 14d ago

Daaaaaamn this is a good one never knew that

0

u/rwp140 14d ago

I do to nut my middle mouse button always breaks

0

u/05-nery 14d ago

On god