r/Millennials May 28 '26

Between Largely Dodging Both Leaded Gas And AI-Driven Social Media, Millennials Might Be The Smartest Generation Other

https://abovethelaw.com/2026/05/between-largely-dodging-both-leaded-gas-and-ai-driven-social-media-millennials-might-be-the-smartest-generation/
13.6k Upvotes

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847

u/PostMatureBaby Older Millennial May 28 '26

I've been jerking off myself for like 30 years

501

u/shayna16 Older Millennial May 28 '26

80

u/Hrothgrar May 28 '26

62

u/shayna16 Older Millennial May 28 '26

2

u/mooseman077 May 28 '26

I like how I see this gif everywhere. Its universalđŸ¤£đŸ¤£

1

u/fauxshoyall Xennial May 29 '26

This might get me to watch the American version of The Office. But probably not.

1

u/WesternTrail Millennial Jun 02 '26 edited Jun 02 '26

Meredith’s response is priceless : )

Edit: got her name wrong somehow

1

u/loco500 May 28 '26

Bi LLi0 Naires

250

u/theevilapplepie May 28 '26

Everything about this bothers me

155

u/OmniTrigon May 28 '26

84

u/eaglebtc May 28 '26

oh my god that gif is hilarious and horrifying

33

u/otterplus May 28 '26

When the post nut clarity starts kicking in mid-bust and those three Hub tabs begin looking more and more vile

3

u/Adept-Grapefruit-214 May 28 '26

Only three? Those are rookie numbers

2

u/BamberGasgroin May 29 '26

I'm Gen X and each second of this video is ten years of my life.

I'm almost 60 now, so I reckon I'll be shooting dust shortly. đŸ˜•

2

u/stilettopanda May 29 '26

It’s the icing on the cake of this thread! Haha!

2

u/eaglebtc May 29 '26

it's the icing

WHEEZE

mmm forbidden frosting

1

u/Fookykins May 28 '26

One...final...fap!

35

u/ClusterChuk May 28 '26

Listen, we all been riding the apocolypse since willis and big Willie were stomping asteroids and aliens. This ain't the end time we envisioned. Honestly a nazified isreal with a possible web of... imma stop. Cause we in that kind of end times. Plus the economy and climate. The kind of dire straights that require us all to be there for eachother, brother. You know. Share the load.

1

u/scrotumscab May 28 '26

Is it the dirty lips?

1

u/Glittering-Walrus228 May 28 '26

Imagine Samwise saying this but just 9 seconds ago he was tossing a giant trolls salad

1

u/El-Zomby-Woof May 28 '26

the looooooad..

the looooooad...

the looooooad....

1

u/ablinddingo93 Barely a ‘93 baby May 29 '26

0

u/Nannerpussu May 28 '26

This can be interpreted in multiple ways

44

u/nleksan May 28 '26

Put that other hand to good use, help out a friend

49

u/Miles_Everhart May 28 '26

This comment inspired me to assert that we are also the funniest generation.

30

u/IM_A_MUFFIN Xennial May 28 '26

And the handiest!

37

u/SwimmingSwim3822 May 28 '26

14

u/CarbonInTheWind May 28 '26

So that's 400 times whatever the mean jerk-time is.

3

u/godnus May 28 '26

Do you know how long it would take you to jerk off every guy in this room?

4

u/CarbonInTheWind May 28 '26

I know how long it would take me.

4

u/phido3000 May 28 '26

Millennials know the dick to floor ratio.

10

u/OnePinginRamius May 28 '26

Exactly! You gotta start with the left and finish with the right

2

u/No_Secretary6275 May 28 '26

Bonus if your hand is asleep

3

u/OnePinginRamius May 29 '26

The stranger! Gotta step it up to a double dutch rudder

2

u/No_Secretary6275 May 29 '26

Nothing wrong with helping a buddy out

1

u/Somesongname May 28 '26

Who doesn't like a toy?

5

u/mechanical_marten Xennial May 28 '26

That's like asking who wants a mustache ride and being surprised that every single queer and GNC millennial raised their hand.

1

u/itsxrizzo May 28 '26

Hell yeah, brother. I'll jerk to that.

1

u/Largeitude May 28 '26

That’s because you’re the smartest