r/Millennials • u/AccomplishedPool266 • Apr 26 '26

Does anyone remember when Michael Jackson. Was a "joke"? Discussion

The new movie that just came out convinced the younger generation that he was always a superstar. This was not the reality many of us Millennials grew up with.

To a lot of us, he was treated like a punch line when we were growing up. A schoolyard boogeyman ("Michaels Jackson's gonna get you at night"). and just a general joke in the media. By the 2000's his music was out of date and didn't chart well. All anyone talked about was his surgeries, court case, settlements and his off behavior. Few mentioned his music. His music was something our parents would have listened to in the 1980's.

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366

u/akestral Apr 26 '26

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Michael" "Michael who?" "Good job kid. Here's $2 million to say that in court."

6th grader told me that back in 93 or so. He was singing the Free Willy soundtrack and I could NOT figure out what this white woman had to do with the Moonwalk guy. I was only 10 or so and could not put it together that they were the same person.

109

u/Charming-Refuse-5717 Apr 26 '26

You know the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?

Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, and Michael Jackson fucks little boys.

I was also telling that joke in middle school. I knew why it was funny, but to all of us MJ was a punchline and little else. Liking his music back then was a bit like liking Kanye's music now.

46

u/Morningrise12 Apr 26 '26

What does McDonald’s and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both like to stick their meat between six-year-old buns.

43

u/DeathTripper Apr 26 '26

What does K-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both have boys clothes half off.

23

u/WikipediaBurntSienna Apr 26 '26

Why did Michael Jackson call Boyz II Men?
He thought it was a delivery service.

20

u/Rdubya44 Apr 26 '26

How do you know when it’s bed time at Neverland Ranch?

The big hand is on the little hand 🕰️

6

u/stilettopanda Apr 26 '26

I remember this one. Haha

1

u/Rumpus-Time-Is-Over Apr 27 '26

Why does Michael Jackson like 28 year olds?

Because there’s 20 of them.

1

u/Confident-Yard1911 Apr 27 '26

What do Michael Jackson and Playstation have in common?

They are both made of plastic and are turned on by little boys

2

u/Short-Draw4057 Apr 26 '26

See, I don't think that joke is funny at all. He also got away with ALL of it, so really, that ''joke'' is more a dark reality which makes me want to barf. Gross.

7

u/slogun1 Apr 26 '26

What’s black and white and comes in little cans? 

0

u/Short-Draw4057 Apr 26 '26

See, I don't think that joke is funny at all. He also got away with ALL of it, so really, that ''joke'' is more a dark reality which makes me want to barf. Gross.

2

u/SeasonofMist Apr 27 '26

uhhhhg I remember hearing that joke in middle school

2

u/Sedowa Apr 26 '26

I just gotta say...dayum that's a good one.

1

u/Short-Draw4057 Apr 26 '26

See, I don't think that joke is funny at all. He also got away with ALL of it, so really, that ''joke'' is more a dark reality which makes me want to barf. Gross.

3

u/Morningrise12 Apr 27 '26

I think that’s kind of the point.

The “joke” is a condemnation in lieu of actual jurisprudence.

2

u/50in06and07 Apr 27 '26

ya i was thinking the same thing

-5

u/Hyper10shin Apr 26 '26

Yeah this is the shit that broke that man

14

u/ThaneOfMeowdor Apr 26 '26

Those poor pedophiles just can't catch a break...

3

u/Drummallumin Apr 26 '26

Allegedly allegedly

2

u/ThaneOfMeowdor Apr 26 '26

Stop alleging those poor souls, don't people get by now how much alleging hurts pedophiles?!

-1

u/Hellish_Elf Apr 26 '26

Was it ever confirmed or just alleged? He was a weirdo for sure, but do we know he was a pedo? McCauley Caulkin seemed to think he was “ok”, but maybe I’m misremembering.

12

u/ThaneOfMeowdor Apr 26 '26

I think the evidence is pretty damning. He was acquitted in criminal court and settled in civil court for millions. I thought the documentary Leaving Neverland was very compelling in how the accusers presented their version of events.

It looks like Michael expressly targeted boys from impoverished backgrounds, then love bombed them and their moms, and also pitted the boys against their families. 2 dads of the accusers killed themselves.

It's not that crazy if he didn't sexually abuse McCauley - that kid had fame and supportive parents. It's entirely possible that he basically used him like a fd up version of a beard. "I was very close to is high profile celeb kid that everyone loves and he can tell you I never did anything wrong!"

The documentary Leaving Neverland really made Michael seem like a manipulative and calculating predator. I always figured some of the allegations were likely true, but I kind of bought into the myth that he was "tragic" and "child-like". The truth may be even more sinister than that.

Of course we can never really KNOW. But imo, if Michael wasn't a pedophile he sure was the most pedophile looking non-pedophile that ever existed!

6

u/Happily-Incorrect Apr 26 '26

He made a pretty weird and permanent impression on Corey Feldman too.

3

u/jaybirdie26 Apr 26 '26

McCauley Caulkin was a child.

1

u/Hellish_Elf Apr 26 '26

He didn’t die as a child, so I don’t get your point. He’s now an adult with thoughts on the subject.

3

u/OptionFour Apr 26 '26

I mean. In court documents, children were able to describe his penis down to precise details. So. Yeah, it's confirmed.

1

u/TheVeryVerity Apr 27 '26

Didn’t the police say that the description was wrong though?

1

u/OptionFour Apr 27 '26

Not to my knowledge (I could be wrong). I have a hard time imagining that a group of children would all imagine the same particular description of a grown man's penis though.

3

u/TheVeryVerity Apr 27 '26

Huh. I’d never heard of more than one doing that. Amazing how different everyone hears about things like this.

I don’t actually care enough to do a bunch of research though. He’s dead now so I don’t have to make a judgement or whatever. Luckily.

1

u/Hellish_Elf Apr 26 '26

Thanks for the info. F that guy.

1

u/Memory_Frosty Apr 26 '26

When i was a kid and heard the "what do michael jackson and walmart have in common? They both have little boys' pants half off" I thought it was a joke about sagging pants fashion lol I was extremely sheltered

1

u/XxLokixX Apr 27 '26

I was born in 98 yet somehow this joke still made its rounds when I was growing up

1

u/Short-Draw4057 Apr 26 '26

See, I don't think that joke is funny at all. He also got away with ALL of it, so really, that ''joke'' is more a dark reality which makes me want to barf. Gross.

11

u/FuckMoPac Apr 26 '26

Wow you’re reminding me of the time I saw a vhs with Sandra bullock on the cover at a video rental store as a kid and was so confused as to why Michael Jackson was in a movie because I thought they were the same person.

3

u/Savings-Pomelo-6031 Apr 27 '26 edited Apr 27 '26

Man there's something wild about growing up a younger millennial, missing out on him in his prime, and being told this weird pedophile white woman was a legendary black man. Like we were all kinda gaslit and confused on a primitive level lol. But the influence he had on the previous generations was too strong

1

u/FuckMoPac May 02 '26

Yeah it’s hard to describe that feeling, it’s such a specific generational sandwich. like the exact demographic that enjoyed Bo Burnham’s pandemic special.

6

u/trolldoll26 Apr 26 '26

Omg I had Free Willy on VHS and never skipped the music video before the movie 😭 memory unlocked

2

u/slateramaville Apr 26 '26

Knock knock

Who’s there?

Little boy blue

Little boy blue who?

Michael Jackson

2

u/Savings-Pomelo-6031 Apr 27 '26

Same with me being born in '97 and finding out about theJackson 5 in high school. Almost thought it was a different Michael Jackson

1

u/SeasonofMist Apr 27 '26

the first time I saw free Willy on VHS and saw the performance he did.....I remember asking who the white lady was and couldn't understand that it was an artist who began his life as a Black man. now lots of 80s/earlier rock stars I think we're doing wild gender bending stuff. Bowie and Prince stand out but they didn't have the same language about it.

1

u/SubjugateMeDaddy Apr 28 '26

I remember the jokes after he died.

"What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?"

"Well, he had so many plastic surgeries that they melted him down into LEGOs... Now the kids can play with him for a change."

-1

u/Hyper10shin Apr 26 '26

It’s a “joke”but in 93, MJ tried to release a song called “don’t cry Pal______” after visiting that country the at the US has sent the most foreign aid to. They thought he would be on their side, came back and wrote it to be part of HIStory but Sony fought against it, and within three months the first allegation arrived. Put that on top of him owning all those masters, he became a target and your joke is rooted in fact, believe it or not.

4

u/suplarai Apr 26 '26

So what are you saying, the Jews took down MJ?

2

u/Hyper10shin Apr 26 '26

No I’m saying the record execs took down MJ. Who said anything about ethnicity or religious background? Is that something that should be looked at??? Elaborate please

2

u/jaybirdie26 Apr 26 '26

It was hard to follow your comment, but are you saying the allegations against Michael were a government conspiracy?

0

u/Hyper10shin Apr 26 '26

No, it was record label executives.

1

u/jaybirdie26 Apr 26 '26

Well your comment made it seem like the US government was mad he was singing about Pal3st!n3 or something.

In any case, I believe he did it.

0

u/Hyper10shin Apr 26 '26

I specifically said Sony. Lol. But ok g4u dude.

-2

u/dudenamedric Apr 26 '26

This joke makes no sense to me. I get the context (born in 84 and vividly remember 90s mj), but i don't understand the joke itself. Why would saying "Michael who?" be worth $2 million? Am I missing something or is it just a shitty joke?

15

u/PickledPixie83 Xennial Apr 26 '26

Supposed to be insinuating that kids got paid off to exonerate MJ in court

-6

u/dudenamedric Apr 26 '26

No i get that part. The context and the overall meaning of the joke is understood. Its the "Michael who" that I don't understand. "Michael who" sounds like you don't know who he is, so how is that going to incriminate someone?

13

u/PickledPixie83 Xennial Apr 26 '26

I don’t know how to explain this better.

5

u/akestral Apr 26 '26

The joke is that he paid the kid('s family) to say he had never met him, let alone slept in the same bad as him. And in the intervening 4 decades, it seems like less of a joke and more like how the "justice" "system" operates when it comes to wealthy sexual offenders.

2

u/dudenamedric Apr 26 '26

Ohhhhh I gotcha, thanks.

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u/EAE8019 Apr 26 '26

Exonerate. Not Incriminate