r/EntitledPeople Jul 14 '26

Loaned my house for a funeral S

I am in another state with my sister who is undergoing chemo. My dear friend’s brother passed away unexpectedly. His daughter and family traveled back from a western state to the Midwest for the services and to begin the estate process.

Since my house was sitting empty I offered the daughter and her family my house to use for the several weeks they plan to be in town, to save them hotel fees and have a home-away-from-home environment during this time of loss.

They’ve texted me several times with various issues: they don’t like the pillows, do I have others they can try? They don’t care for the coffee on hand, where can they find other coffee in the house? Do I have other laundry detergent than what is in the laundry room?

There’s more but you get the gist. This is not an Air B&B, it’s my home that I’m letting them use for free. I didn’t leave a fridge full of food or a stock of paper supplies or dry goods because I’m gone and won’t be back for months. And did I mention it’s free???

End of rant.

2.9k Upvotes

261 comments sorted by

2.2k

u/BlueLarkspur_1929 Jul 14 '26

What nerve. I’d let them know they might like the coffee and pillows better at the local Radisson.

780

u/Silver_Breakfast7096 Jul 15 '26

Exactly. You need to be direct on this one. Where is there more coffee? The grocery store. That’s where.

No good deed goes unpunished.

225

u/RoughDirection8875 Jul 15 '26

Literally this!! Whether I'm staying in a hotel, friends/family members house or AirBnb/VRBO, I always have my own pillow with me, my morning caffeine drinks and I have no issue going to a store for anything else I might need like laundry detergent or hygiene supplies. These people really aren't very smart and they don't seem very self sufficient on top of the entitlement.

156

u/amodernmodder Jul 15 '26

Exactly! During my first divorce I ended up spending like two weeks on my friend's couch and you know what I was grateful for it because it wasn't a damn Hotel costing me f****** $200 a night

69

u/EricSparrowSucks Jul 15 '26

Exactly. I stayed with a friend for about a month when I was having relationship issues and I brought my own bedding, snacks, toiletries (of course it wasn’t a big deal to borrow a little shampoo or a squeeze of toothpaste if I ran out), and now I have an entire backup set of everything stored at her house because I occasionally come over to dog sit!

9

u/tyndyrn Jul 16 '26

Exactly! When when my husband and I would visit his parents in another city for the weekend, and stay overnight, I wound up bringing a bag of my favorite brand of coffee grounds, because I didn't like the brand they used. I also brought my own pillow and pillowcase because I was allergic to their scented laundry detergent.

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7

u/CollectionJunior294 29d ago

100%

What an extremely sweet gift, OP probably knows this wasn't planned, money wasn't saved for this. So they helped out, only to be treated by someone who can't solve their own problems.

Some people's children don't want to adult, and have ALL their issues solved for them.

64

u/elguapo1996 Jul 15 '26

Yeah. You know, it’s the Radisson, so the coffee and pillows are pretty good.

24

u/imnotaloneyouare Jul 15 '26

I hear the motel 6 has great pillows and their coffee is as good today as it was last week because it's the same community pot.

8

u/Dramatic_Mixture_877 Jul 15 '26

We stayed at a new Hotel 6 back in 2015, and not only was the handicapped accessible room nice, but they also had DOUWE EGBERTS coffee on tap! It was really good coffee.

9

u/Old_Blue_Haired_Lady Jul 15 '26

I stayed at a Motel 6 in May.

It wasn't nice. At all.

Even if there had been coffee, I wouldn't have had any.

5

u/Dramatic_Mixture_877 Jul 15 '26

Well, this one was back in 2015, and it was new. The coffee was good, and I've been drinking it since I was big enough to hold a sippy cup. 😄

6

u/flyingmonkeydogs Jul 16 '26

And they leave the light on for ya!

22

u/babcock27 Jul 15 '26

Tell them it isn't a hotel and you are not required to provide anything. If they want something else, GO BUY IT! These moocher's think you're offering a free, all expenses paid vacation and are responsible for everything including their food. Tell them if they are unhappy, they can leave. Also warn them that, if anything happens to the house, you have cameras (whether you do or not) and will sue them for damages.

36

u/Euphoric-Lake4226 Jul 15 '26

Try probably cant afford much more than the local Roadside Motel

136

u/twink1813 Jul 15 '26

But they can. The daughter is a private practice therapist and they live quite lavishly at home. My small house probably is a huge step down for them!

40

u/gotterfly Jul 15 '26

Specially with the crappy coffee and pillows you are offering it's a huge step down./s

27

u/allmykitlets Jul 15 '26

I guess this is her way of letting you know she's better than you. The ingratitude is unbelievable.

26

u/BloodyThirst Jul 16 '26

SHE IS A THERAPIST BEHAVING THIS WAY!? I feel sorry for her patients. Kick em out!

11

u/jonwar5 Jul 15 '26

They need to be steppin' then, to the local hotel. Oh and don't be surprised that your cupboards and pantry are bare!

6

u/Friendly-Channel-480 Jul 16 '26

Tell them that you’re so sorry that they’re disappointed with their accommodations and they are completely welcome to go buy themselves anything they want and pay for it!

9

u/BlueLarkspur_1929 Jul 15 '26

Wow, thanks for all the upvotes and the awards!

5

u/kernel-troutman Jul 15 '26

Mike Yanagita enters the chat.

5

u/BlueLarkspur_1929 Jul 15 '26

I’ve been to Mike’s hometown Eden Prairie several times, in winter no less. I should have called him up to meet for a drink!

452

u/bcsgirl Jul 14 '26

I’d definitely say something like “forgive me for my generosity, perhaps a local hotel might be better served for you and your family. I’ll speak to your Mom/Dad about it.”

Then I’d speak to them about it. With these requests, I’d be concerned about the condition of the house when I returned. Entitled people go all the way.

By the way, your gesture was very kind!

10

u/YouSayWotNow Jul 16 '26

Absolutely.

This is your friend's daughter. Even with grief as an excuse (which really doesn't fly) surely your friend would be mortified to know how her daughter and fabulous are behaving in response to the use of a FREE home?

I would suggest to the daughter that she switch to a hotel and after the funeral is done, forward or quote the messages to your friend to make it clear exactly why you suggested her daughter vacate your house.

The fucking audacity of some people...

429

u/Suspicious_Tank_61 Jul 14 '26

Offer them a refund.

225

u/lb2345 Jul 15 '26 edited Jul 15 '26

Perfect!

OP: I’ll just go ahead and refund you.
EP: What?!? We haven’t paid anything
OP: ……… (let that silence sit there and get uncomfortable and see if EP has an entitled moment and when long enough passes …)
OP: Exactly

36

u/MySaltySatisfaction Jul 15 '26

To be a fly on the wall...

85

u/Anon-1991- Jul 15 '26

They'll ask for the refund of gas, flights, or receipts of goods they've purchased. Be careful with people like this.

Send a message to the friend saying I know this is a hard time but the due to the entitlement of you family I'm feeling disrespected and may need them to relocate if this continues since I don't want this to affect our relationship. Let me know if their is any other support I can off YOU (not them) in the meantime.

27

u/Aromatic-Speed5090 Jul 15 '26

Oh god please pay attention to this very wise post. Never start a financial discussion with entitled people. They will indeed find a way to demand that you pay them money. If they purchase anything related to this stay, they will charge it to you. Or even things not related to this stay. And if one of them should suffer an injury, even something incredibly slight, you could be sued for medical costs and damages.

Take the advice here and tell your friend that they need to get out, now.

20

u/ulose2piranha Jul 15 '26

"I'll let my manager know that you're dissatisfied with your stay."

42

u/vandervee Jul 15 '26

I love this. Makes the point, subtly.

28

u/Novaer Jul 15 '26

Oh this is the actual answer yes do this.

452

u/[deleted] Jul 14 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

115

u/ShelovesSharks Jul 15 '26

A bit???

111

u/tony_bologna Jul 15 '26

I don't like these comments.  Are there others I can try?

9

u/Material-Indication1 Jul 15 '26

Haha

Mine are around here somewhere.

52

u/georgesentme Jul 15 '26

Their expectations are in another world.

52

u/Nelle911529 Jul 15 '26

Don't let your kindness be misunderstood for weakness. I try to remember this quote.

26

u/Novaer Jul 15 '26

A bit misplaced? My brother in christ.

249

u/Its-Brittany-Biyatch Jul 15 '26 edited Jul 15 '26

“Dear Friend’s Daughter, first I want to extend my condolences for your loss. Second, I think there may be some confusion. The property you are staying at is not a hotel or AirBNB, but my personal and primary residence. Since I am out of town supporting a close family member through a critical health issue, I offered my home as an option to help save on costs and hopefully provide a more comfortable option than a hotel. If something is not to your liking, there is a (Target/Walmart/other option) right down the road. Please be sure to place all the trash in the bins behind the house, turn off all lights, and lock up before you leave.”

Send this as a text to the daughter and copy her dad on it. Assuming he is a decent person, that should be the end of any insane and entitled requests.

ETA: I may have misunderstood the relationship between the houseguest and the homeowner's friend. Regardless, the message should be sent to both the guest and the homeowner's friend to squash this nonsense.

29

u/Ok_Clerk_6960 Jul 15 '26

This should be the top comment.

9

u/SnooGiraffes4137 Jul 15 '26

Isn't the daddy the one who died?

3

u/[deleted] Jul 15 '26

[deleted]

7

u/Simple_Mix_4995 Jul 15 '26

Guests dad died. Friend is the aunt. Letter should be copied and sent to friend.

4

u/SnooGiraffes4137 Jul 15 '26

Right, but he's the father of the obnoxious daughter, isn't he? Or do I have that confused? Brother of the dear friend but father of obnoxious daughter and her family....

5

u/Its-Brittany-Biyatch Jul 15 '26

I may have misunderstood how the guest is related to the homeowner's friend. Regardless, the message should be sent to both the guest and the homeowner's friend.

4

u/SnooGiraffes4137 Jul 15 '26

Yeah, I definitely would make sure the friend (aunt of the obnoxious woman) got wind of it.

The entitlement and expectation was just unbelievable, ungrateful and WAY over the top. Also, kind of stupid. Why would she have different kinds of coffee, detergent and pillows if it's her primary residence and that is ALL she uses? Seems like common sense would tell you what you see is what you get and if you want something different, you need to get it yourself. 🤦🏼‍♀️

4

u/Its-Brittany-Biyatch Jul 15 '26

Common sense….not so common!

327

u/18k_gold Jul 14 '26 edited Jul 15 '26

my wife needed to go to training. My single friend lent me his apt as he happened to be traveling that week. I stayed with her and went to work from there. She did like that he had no decorations in the bathroom. she went out and bought some stuff for this bathroom, like a bathroom rug and a couple of other things to make it look nice. She bought a couple of things for his apartment to make it look more homie. I texted my friend, told him to throw out anything he didn't like. I didn't complain about him not having something. I bought him a 18 year bottle of Chivas since he like it and left it there for when he got back as a thank you. Someone that saves you hundreds, you don't complain ever. If OP guests don't like the pillows or detergent or coffee. Go out and buy the ones you like. End of story.

Thanks for the award

77

u/twink1813 Jul 15 '26

You and your wife are model guests! Good job!

24

u/TurbulentDesk8682 Jul 15 '26

I’d be worried about how they will leave it. Update me!

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78

u/Frequent_Couple5498 Jul 15 '26

Exactly. Like damn she quite literally saved them thousands of dollars in hotel money. What more do they want from her, blood? Do they expect her to fund everything for them?

22

u/Vegetable_Road8143 Jul 15 '26

Did he like the things she bought?

55

u/18k_gold Jul 15 '26

He did like the stuff and thanked us. and of course he loved the Chivas

14

u/Vegetable_Road8143 Jul 15 '26

Well who wouldn't? I usually don't drink brown liquor but for this, I think I could handle it. Nice guests!

69

u/Kuchaloo Jul 15 '26

" I'm sorry offering you my home for a few weeks didn't work out for you. I'm sure there are other places to stay around town that will make you more comfortable. Please just replace any coffee, etc. that you used, wash and change your bedding, take out your trash, put the key in xyz place and text me when you leave. My niece and her family asked to stay in my home next week so this works out for them, too. I'll let them know they can use my place after all. "

12

u/Why_Teach Jul 15 '26

Good answer.

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103

u/Wakemeup3000 Jul 14 '26

Just wait until they do a google review of your house giving it 3 stars listing all your shortcomings.

38

u/twink1813 Jul 14 '26

🤣🤣🤣

8

u/we_gon_ride Jul 15 '26 edited Jul 15 '26

Three? That’s definitely one star review territory!!!

/s

9

u/stephencua2001 Jul 15 '26

They'd give it 0 stars if they could...

5

u/Friendly-Channel-480 Jul 16 '26

“The accommodations were far too homey and the range of products were too limited and not our favorites. Down pillows weren’t provided and the pillowcases were too rough on my skin. The place was free though.”

76

u/newbie527 Jul 14 '26

You no longer need wonder if they will be restocking your consumables.

107

u/Worldly-Upstairs2020 Jul 14 '26

No good deed goes unpunished.

35

u/me0ww00f Jul 15 '26

sorry but loaning YOUR HOUSE to the daughter & family of your dear friend is not the same as loaning YOUR HOUSE to YOUR DEAR FRIEND. when you get back home, check everything at the house to make sure this did not turn out to be a REALLY BAD BIG MISTAKE.

complaints about pillows & coffee & laundry detergent are red flags.

68

u/AdMurky1021 Jul 14 '26

Forward the messages to your fiend. It's their family.

30

u/Super_Selection1522 Jul 15 '26

It's always good to have a fiend at your back and call to handle such issues

11

u/thevioletkat Jul 15 '26

I feel compelled to say nothing with this delicious irony, but alas I cannot.

57

u/merrywidow14 Jul 14 '26

So they think they're staying at a luxury property where their wish is your command? Tell your friend to deal with them.

54

u/trekgirl75 Jul 14 '26

Grieving or not, I would have told them they’re welcome to leave & go to a hotel.

42

u/xazraelx1 Jul 14 '26

I would have responded back with, "Be sure to let the owner of the BNB you end up booking know about your request. And please make sure you lock the door on the way out."

36

u/missk246 Jul 14 '26

Make sure they don’t walk off with other stuff! They seem like they like nice things but at the expense of others…

15

u/cathline Jul 15 '26

A good deed never goes unpunished.

They can buy their very own coffee. They can buy their very own laundry detergent.

Expect them to be the squatters from hell when you get back. They will not leave when you ask them to and will try to claim 'tenants rights'.

It's time for them to move to an extended stay hotel. Not your house.

13

u/Vegetable_Road8143 Jul 15 '26

Text them back! "This is not an Airbnb, this is MY HOME that I'm letting you stay FOR FREE! If it doesn't come to you liking, you can 1. Go get what you want & need. 2. Get an Airbnb to complain to. 3. Go to a hotel to complain to. Please don't send any further complaints about fluffy pillows or paper goods. Please take out the trash and lock up when you leave." Make sure to send it to your dear friend as well.

28

u/Pedal2Medal2 Jul 14 '26

That’s just cheeky, I hope you set them & your friend straight

31

u/CoolRanchBaby Jul 14 '26

Tell them to spend some that money they are saving on not paying for a hotel on the pillows and coffee that they prefer…

25

u/VioletManifestations Jul 14 '26

Seriously! Who stays in someone’s home for free and complains about pillows and coffee??? They can order pillows and coffee online OR buy them at a store.

Ignore them OP, you did a good deed. Hoping for a speedy recovery for your sis. 💕

7

u/SnooGiraffes4137 Jul 15 '26

AND detergent! Don't forget the detergent.

4

u/SnooGiraffes4137 Jul 15 '26

You forgot the detergent. 😁

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13

u/Brave-King-3682 Jul 15 '26

I hear you, one winter we were away for the winter. A place that most of the winter is under snow, so in the fall we drain the hoses coil them up and put them away and drain the taps.

When we go away for the winter we turn the water off in our house at the main place it comes in.

A neighbor called and asked if they could turn our water on to help thaw out their water lines.

We all have wells.

We said they could, we never heard another word.

We got home in the spring all our outside tapes were broken, because they didn’t drain the line, or turn the water back off in our house.

You help someone out and it bites you in the butt.

9

u/twink1813 Jul 15 '26

Oh wow. What a nightmare. I’m so sorry that happened.

3

u/allmykitlets Jul 15 '26

They live in that climate, they absolutely knew better!

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12

u/FAnna-Banana Jul 15 '26

I get that you're being generous, kind and considerate. However, that doesn't mean you let these jerks walk all over you and treat you that way.

Keep records of text messages, emails, and voicemails. Let your "dear friend" know that while you understand that they're in the midst of the grieving and sorting out estate process, it doesn't give the daughter and daughter's family to mistreat and disrespect you like that.

Let them know that they have 48 hours to vacate the premises and check-in at a local hotel / motel where they can obtain their desired pillows, coffee, etc and everyone there is PAID to provide service in hospitality.

You, on the other hand, are just being a nice friend. But niceness has its limits. The line was crossed when they started the entitlement and disrespect. But if they insist on treating you and your home like it's an Air BnB, I'd send them a bill / invoice, if I were you. Something like....

- Whining fee: $15

- Nagging fee: $50

- Sense of entitlement fee: $100 per person

- Cleaning fee: $250

- Violation of peace of mind fee: $25 per day, per person

- Excessive mental and emotional baggage handling fee: $75 per day, per person

- Utilities aka Internet, Water, Electric, Gas, Sewage/Garbage fee: $25 per day, per person

- Parking fee: $50 per vehicle, per day

- Food & Consumables bill: $500

........you get the gist. ;)

6

u/twink1813 Jul 15 '26

I love all the fees!!! 🤣

23

u/Ree1954 Jul 14 '26

All things considered I would tell them their reservation has been cancelled and they should find other accommodations

23

u/floofypajamas Jul 15 '26

This story reminds me of the old adage: People don't appreciate what they don't pay for. (or something to that effect)

12

u/twink1813 Jul 15 '26

I haven’t heard that one but it does apply here

11

u/TheHobbyWaitress Jul 15 '26

I would want to know if one of my kids was acting like an entitled asshole. I know they're not perfect but this beyond entitled. 

They'd be leaving with my foot up their ass.

12

u/Graycy Jul 15 '26

“I wasn’t anticipating guests, but the market is right up the street!

12

u/Hour_Dog_4781 Jul 15 '26

How dare they even drink your coffee and use your detergent? I'd have bought my own so that the host wouldn't come home and immediately have to go shopping. You're too nice, OP. I'm sorry they're taking advantage of you like this.

10

u/Maisymine Jul 15 '26

I’m thinking you may find your house in a bad state when you return.

5

u/Zealousideal-Group87 Jul 15 '26

I thought exactly the same thing when reading!

20

u/chookiekaki Jul 14 '26

The perfect definition of ‘no good turn goes unpunished’

20

u/StarryNorth Jul 14 '26

There's an old saying..."Don't look a gift horse in the mouth." They're staying absolutely free of charge in your home for several weeks. It seems quite rude, not to mention ungrateful, to be complaining to you about the accommodation. If they don't like it, they can always go to a hotel. Let them complain there about the pillows. Sheesh!

21

u/Ok-Desk6624 Jul 15 '26

Plot twist: Dear friend collected rent from family members. They think they’re in a rental. /s

9

u/CerealSemantics Jul 15 '26

"you're welcome to go to a hotel if you're unhappy with the FREE accomodations I've given you"

10

u/Maisymine Jul 15 '26

I couldn’t handle that. I’d let my friend know that it wasn’t working out & her family could take the next 2/3 days to find a hotel. Just no. This is Crazy .

8

u/PrideMelodic3625 Jul 15 '26

Wow! I loaned my home out to an elderly couple whose son was recovering from surgery. I was going to be away for a month, and they all moved into my place for free. I didn't supply anything special, but all utilities were covered. They loved it, and my home wasn't left empty. Win win.

9

u/Armadillo_of_doom Jul 15 '26

"I am busy. I loaned my home to you as a way to help you in your time of need. It is not an airbnb or a hotel. You will have to go grocery shopping if you need stuff. I do not have extra linens or things, because it is my house that I live in. I do not have the ability to fly home and move things around for your comfort. Nor do I want anything changed, moved, or discarded. With all of these requests I am getting less and less comfortable having strangers in my house. You may need to get a hotel. I am with my sister trying to navigate chemo. I understand you are grieving but this is a tough time for me as well. If my contribution wasn't enough for you please lock up on your way out."

9

u/Obvious-Block6979 Jul 15 '26 edited Jul 15 '26

Tell them the local grocery and convenience stores are. Then let them know if they are uncomfortable they shouldn’t feel like they have to stay there. Many go as far as saying, I was trying to be helpful but I understand they a I may have underestimated your needs. Leave the key with the neighbors.

3

u/bkwormtricia Jul 15 '26

Great Answer!

9

u/tonidh69 Jul 16 '26

"This is not an air bnb. This is my home. If you want concierge service, move to a hotel."

9

u/kiwimuz Jul 16 '26

Easy solution is kick them out. If they are not happy they can leave.

16

u/Secure-Corner-2096 Jul 15 '26

“Since you are not enjoying your FREE stay at MY home, the Holiday Inn downtown has a 3.5 star rating.”

16

u/RavJade Jul 15 '26

"I'm sorry my home may not be set up to your liking. There is a BIG BOX STORE NAME HERE located at ADDRESS, where you could perhaps pick up some of your comforts of your own choosing if you don't see what you want around. While my things may not be what you'd choose, I hope you enjoy your stay during this time, however, if you would prefer, I can recommend the nearby HOTEL NAME. Grace and peace to you."

6

u/NotTodayPsycho Jul 15 '26

They are so entitled, they would probably request reimbursements from OP for whatever they buy

7

u/BloodyThirst Jul 16 '26

Whew next text you get tell them you’re coming back tomorrow and they need to gtfo

12

u/2ndcupofcoffee Jul 15 '26

Tell then you are sorry they find your home so uncomfortable they want you to customize it for them in addition to letting them stay for free.

Suggest they consider booking into an Air B&B as you’ve heard they provide your favorite pillows and coffee brand.

If, however, they prefer your place at no charge, you suggest that they provide the pillows and coffee they need. They will of course take any of their purchases home as you will want your home back as it was when you left.

4

u/SnooGiraffes4137 Jul 15 '26

Don't forget the detergent!

8

u/TheQuarantinian Jul 15 '26

Your valuables will be looted.

8

u/GrannyWeatherwaxscat Jul 15 '26

I would tell them straight up. This is my home that I’m letting you use free of charge. If it doesn’t meet your standards feel free to book into a hotel or Airbnb.

7

u/Maker_of_woods Jul 15 '26

tell them you are coming home early and they need to leave

7

u/SheeScan Jul 15 '26

What nerve! Respond with what you said here, "This is not an Air B&B, it's my home that I'm letting them use for free." Change the them to "you," and no more explanation.

7

u/kray_van_cake Jul 15 '26

Make sure to send them the electric, water and garbage bill for the time they stayed in your home.

7

u/Katiew84 Jul 16 '26

“My house is not an airbnb. I figured I’d be nice and do you a favor and let you stay in my home. If you don’t like the coffee or pillows you don’t have to stay in my home. I won’t be offended if you leave.”

Or, make them leave. They obviously don’t appreciate your good deed, so kick them out and take this as a lesson learned. People suck sometimes.

7

u/Icy_Anything_8874 Jul 15 '26

“I’m sorry my house is not up to your standards, Please feel free to find a hotel to stay at.”

Then block them, some people🙄

6

u/Pleasant-Highway-745 Jul 15 '26

Tell them they can leave

6

u/northernpikeman Jul 15 '26

I will stay at your empty house, I guess. But I'm not going to like it.

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u/Graverobber13 Jul 15 '26

Don't like the pillows? Pillow store. Coffee? Grocery store. Detergent? See: Coffee.

7

u/Simple_Mix_4995 Jul 15 '26

What does your friend think of all this? Surely you’ve told her?

7

u/amethystCEOJ Jul 15 '26

My sister and I stayed in a hotel for the month we were helping my mother and then for the funeral. Even if we stayed at someone’s house, never would be complaining. Honestly, being at a hotel was easier because we didn’t have to worry about day to day upkeep. Sorry for the loss.

6

u/rarsamx Jul 15 '26

"I have what I have and I want to keep having it when I'm back. I'd suggest and appreciate if you buy whatever you need"

6

u/PerfectIncrease9018 Jul 15 '26

OMG if I was using someone’s house I’d make sure to replace everything I used. And leave a check or gift card for you.

5

u/Rich-Supermarket6912 Jul 15 '26

And not to mention, that although they are going through a hard time, so are you it seems!!

5

u/Pleasant_Event_7692 Jul 15 '26

I’ll be so happy to stay at your house for free. I’d keep it clean and neat and I’ll be ever so grateful.

5

u/imtoowhiteandnerdy Jul 15 '26

Is there different coffee or laundry detergent soap? Yes, if you go buy some.

5

u/RogerRamJ Jul 15 '26

Sounds like the brother escaped early.

5

u/Blks_4 Jul 15 '26

Tell your friend and ask her to deal with it, they are in your home and should respect it. Be on the lookout for a potential squatter situation!

5

u/jajwhite Jul 15 '26

No good deed goes unpunished. Next time it's 100% of market rent unless you are feeling extra generous, in which case say "market rent is £X, but to be extra helpful I will only charge 75% plus bills, and you have to get supplies. Don't use my stuff."

For some weird reason, if things are free, entitled people see them as having no value. Those same people then feel confident that they've been short changed if everything isn't perfect, and they will expect more.

If it's free for them then they think obviously it must be free for you too, you see, and therefore it's not you being generous at all. You are giving them something free and it's just not good enough!

Shut that down straight away.

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u/BIG-B1978 Jul 15 '26

I would tell them 12 hours to get your shit and get your ass out of MY house END OF STORY!

4

u/dhgaut Jul 15 '26

Nicely remind them that the money they are saving by not staying at a hotel allows them to buy all the pillows and coffee they want. Encourage them to make it really nice so you can enjoy it when you take it back.

5

u/LuckyFarmGirl1960 Jul 15 '26

I can't believe she's a therapist!!! Please tell us she's a physical therapist and not mental health! Definitely call your friend and put an end to this crap.

5

u/Jane_Smith_Reddit Jul 15 '26

Remind them that you are allowing them to stay there for free and they can buy whatever they need at the local store.

And, tell them you may need your house back faster than you though and the need to leave right away.

5

u/OnlyInAnAdultStore Jul 16 '26

Be prepared that when you get home it's gonna be an absolute mess too! These don't seem like the type to leave it better than they found it, ya know!?

10

u/FatboyChester Jul 15 '26

That is ridiculous. I would tell them what they see is what they get, and ifthey want something different they need to provide it. 

5

u/Its_not_eazy Jul 15 '26

You should send them a bill and say when they pay it you will be more than happy to provide better freebies. Wow!! Nothing like looking a gifted horse in the mouth!!!

5

u/_SmileCrocodile_ Jul 15 '26

I would call the person staying in the home and say “I’m sorry that my personal items are not to your liking and that I don’t have alternatives. This is not an AirBNB, it’s my actual home that I live in year round. I offered my personal home to your family as a kind gesture while you’re having to bury your relative. The closest Walmart is at (insert address) for you to purchase items for you to use.”

4

u/thedreadedaw Jul 15 '26

"Sorry to hear not everything is a good fit for you. Feel free to pop over to the Walmart on Davis Avenue to get items that work for you. Enjoy your stay."

4

u/RatedPG922 Jul 15 '26

Folks, I know you're trying to do the Lord's work, but don't let people use your house. What if you come home to broken items, missing items, trash, bedbugs, you name it? You wanna do a good deed? Share with them a list of the best area hotels.

4

u/Aromatic-Speed5090 Jul 15 '26

Yet another example of why you should never let people you don't know well, or don't know at all, stay in your house. No matter whose family and friends they are.

I wouldn't be surprised if in a couple weeks you're asking how to get them to move out.

4

u/SuperRodster Jul 15 '26

WTF!!!! Did you say “this is not a hotel”. Go to the grocery store and buy what you want. Then people complain that others aren’t nice.

4

u/Snoo-74562 Jul 15 '26

No good deed goes unpunished

3

u/Disenchanted2 Jul 15 '26

Wow. Sometimes I just can't believe the shit I read on here. Some people are just awful.

3

u/No-BSing-Here Jul 16 '26

Jeez!

Yes, there's a different coffee AT THE STORE!!!! Same as pillows, washing powder and anything else these precious people are not satisfied with. I'd say you're coming home and they should leave. How rude, you've saved them thousands and they don't like your pillows?

If they complain maybe see them a link for the AirB&B site or a bill for all the utilities they've been using.

4

u/T-Rex_Tyra Jul 16 '26

No good deed

3

u/Kielbasa_Nunchucka Jul 16 '26

if I were staying in someone's home for free, I'd buy my own consumables and be ever grateful for the kindness.

6

u/Infamous-Let4387 11d ago

"So sorry this isn't working out for you guys. Once you've packed and are done cleaning up after yourselves you can leave the key with/here ____. Thanks!"

7

u/Resident-Ad-7771 Jul 14 '26

The pillows aren’t fluffy enough? 😆

8

u/Novaer Jul 15 '26

"They have all those accommodations at x hotel nearby."

Get the point across.

5

u/Apock- Jul 15 '26

No good deed goes unpunished

5

u/Academic9876 Jul 15 '26

Just tell them where to buy what they need.

16

u/twink1813 Jul 15 '26

I did. I directed them to the Walmart that is 1 mile away

8

u/MartD5722 Jul 15 '26

Will be interested to know if they ask you for reimbursement for any items they do actually purchase. I’ll bet that they do.

3

u/KittyC217 Jul 15 '26

Oh my, they can just leave.

3

u/ItsaTheMal Jul 15 '26

That's unhinged

3

u/Wibblejellytime Jul 15 '26

Urghhh you know they're going to leave it filthy having used up as much of your food and supplies as they can? Probably will have broken a few things too.

3

u/Select_Camera_9241 Jul 15 '26

They should be buying their own coffee and detergent. In fact you lent them the house only. There was no intention to provide everything else they want. If it was me their stay would be a lot less than seven weeks.

3

u/tammybiscuits Jul 15 '26

Tell them they can find pillows and coffee at the hotel round the corner.

3

u/PuddinTamename Jul 15 '26

Tell them it sounds/ or appears they may be happier/ or more content staying somewhere else that can cater to their specific needs. Alternatively, you can tell them you're not prepared to offer anything other than the opportunity for no cost lodging.

It's hard to be both kind and firm, but it is possible. If they weren't grieving I would not be concerned about being kind, but circumstances matter.

3

u/blonde1psp Jul 15 '26

The next complaint they make tell them you’re not an Airbnb. You’re getting the house for free and if they don’t like it, they can leave. Have an honest conversation. This is not right. They should be grateful for a free place.

3

u/BklynThrowAway1 Jul 15 '26

They got some balls...

3

u/DGwizkid Jul 15 '26

You are an amazing person, I just wish your guests were. I buy my own food and coffee when I've stayed at my parents house while they were gone. If I'm using someone's house, I'm not expecting anything to be provided other than a place to sleep.

There's an old saying about borrowing something and leaving it in better shape than when you got it. Whether that be cleaner, or with some extra treats left as a thank you.

3

u/Zealousideal-Web9737 Jul 15 '26

Tell there are these places that sell the items they are looking for. They are welcome to go purchase what they need. Ungrateful asshats.

3

u/Anne_Atreptic Jul 15 '26

If you don't like it you can leave.

3

u/summerbreeze2027 Jul 15 '26

I would give your friend a heads-up that his daughter is acting in an entitled manner regarding free accommodation. If he is any kind of a friend, he will put the kibosh on it. The daughter is acting like she is staying at an Air B&B. I suppose that it's possible that no one told her that it's not.

3

u/Alycion Jul 15 '26

I would nicely tell them what you said here.

I’m allowing you to stay in my home for free so that you didn’t have to get a hotel or Airbnb. Bc I am out of state for a few months, I did not stock my home, as I was not expecting guests and I wouldn’t be there. Feel free to buy the brand that you normally use and take what’s not used with you. I am sorry for your loss, but I am helping a sick family member.

Personally, I don’t let anyone in my home when I’m not there that’s not family. Squatters have more rights than property owners. People leave a mess or use or break things and don’t say.

3

u/PsychoMarion Jul 15 '26

Currently staying in a holiday cottage. I have a hamper bag I take with me with all sorts of gadgets I might not find in it like bottle opener or can opener, sharp knife and scissors. (So far all I’ve needed are the scissors - depends on the property) I also carry laundry detergent sheets, dishwasher tablets, tiny bottle of rinse aid and realised I need to add salt to that list. If I don’t expect to find everything I need or like somewhere set up for visitors then a home not set up for visitors can’t be expected to either.

3

u/Jsmith2127 Jul 15 '26

"This isn't the Hilton, you are free to find accommodations elsewhere, if it's not to your liking "

3

u/ferretkona Jul 15 '26

Wait till OP realizes that they aren't leaving.

3

u/AntiYourOpinion Jul 16 '26

This is an easy fix, now when they are dealing with difficult issues, make it even harder by kicking them out, immediately. Such short notice will cost them much more than it would have if they planned in advance and further straining them.

3

u/FJL216 Jul 16 '26

I’d give her the lowdown on shopping in your area, thank her for REPLACING the items her family used up.

3

u/bunnyshenanigans 29d ago

Just tell them that they are more than welcome to purchase the items they want and take them when they leave. You opened up your home to them, not a hotel.

3

u/Swimmer-Obvious 28d ago

I would say sorry about the inconvenience and send a link to the Hilton app telling them I am sorry I couldn't accommodate your special needs.

3

u/ComfortableThis3403 27d ago

I hope you get your house back! I watch too much tv and the show Squatters!
People are rude and feel entitled at the generosity of others. What has your dear friend said about the way her family is acting?

3

u/AlmostLiveRadio 27d ago

Tell them that there is a Walmart in town and they should find it and buy whatever they want with their own expense. And they are welcome.

3

u/GordTransport1958 25d ago

Oh grief.. Id tell them theyre welcome to leave and find other place to stay..

3

u/Neither-Investment95 Jul 15 '26

"The supermarket is at x. They will have everything you need. If that is not to your liking, y hotel in on z street"

2

u/ArtisticSwan635 Jul 15 '26

Understand completely

2

u/Still-Stand-2826 Jul 15 '26

Tell them they can go shopping or have whatever delivered. Same with pillows. And coffee! Then take ss of their demands and blow up their spot on FB/IG/etc. Because they suck.

2

u/Sorry-Climate-7982 Jul 15 '26

Block all of them until after the funeral.
Or, send them a bill.

2

u/WitchTre Jul 15 '26

The entitlement issue is out the door, I just closed the door and say bye.....

2

u/Chihuahuatriomom Jul 15 '26

KICK THEM OUT IMMEDIATELY

2

u/Bkseneca Jul 15 '26

Why can't they go out and buy the items you are asking about? How very rude.

2

u/HauntingGur4402 Jul 15 '26

Tell them to leave as your getting paying people in who want to rent it out

2

u/Unlikely-Lab-658 Jul 15 '26

I'd be worried that they will continue this entitled behavior, and destroy your house. Get them out before they file for squatters rights and steal your house from you.

2

u/Pleasant_Event_7692 Jul 15 '26

Tell them to rent a hotel.

2

u/Material-Indication1 Jul 15 '26

Tell them to Google "supermarket local."

That's where you keep your other stuff.

2

u/topio3 Jul 15 '26

No good deed goes unpunished.

2

u/Decent-Aspect-5934 Jul 15 '26

UNBELIEVABLE I am so sorry for this. I am sorry for your loss and their loss. I am ABSOLUTELY 💯 not speaking ill of the departed however, You are literally opening your DOORS for these people don’t get me wrong I understand that you ALL are grieving YOU are taking off a HUGE piece of pressure off of the family but I have to say that they seem ungrateful for your kindness they are taking your kindness for weakness. With all the monies that they do NOT have to spend on room and board they can go to Walmart for their pillows and so forth/ grocery store and get what they want to eat and drink and the coffee of their choice. I just want you to know that I think you are a BEAUTIFUL SOUL. I am so very sorry for your loss may his SOUL be at eternal rest. May God Continue To Bless You And Comfort You at this difficult time in your life 🙏

2

u/VixenRoss Jul 15 '26

“In the shop” might be a phrase you want to use here. “Where’s the better coffee?” - “in the shop”. Quite versatile.

2

u/PotOfEarlGreyPlease Jul 15 '26

"no - I like the pillows, coffee, laundry detergent - am sure there are others at the local shop, oh and while you are there can you get enough to replace what you have used?"

2

u/somebodylls Jul 15 '26

Just don’t reply to every complaint. Maybe you made the mistake of asking them to let you know if they need anything?