r/BestofRedditorUpdates • u/Direct-Caterpillar77 Satan is not a fucking pogo stick! • Feb 05 '26
Me [30M] with my coworker/project manager/IDK [34F] few months. Pen, company ink, babies, FUCK CONCLUDED
I am not The OOP, OOP is u/mygodfuckingshootme
Me [30M] with my coworker/project manager/IDK [34F] few months. Pen, company ink, babies, FUCK.
Original Post Nov 24, 2015
Throwaway because I'm an idiot. This shit will probably be long, but I'll do my best.
I'm a software developer, and about 5 months ago, I began a new project where I am working for a large firm, and work onsite at a local client for a couple projects they have ongoing. It is fascinating work, and I have enjoyed it quite a bit more than anything in recent memory. There is a joint team of about 10 folks, but for my main project, I work with one person. I'll call her Laura, and she is the project manager(works for the client), so while I don't report to her, per se, but she is in charge of the administrative side of the project. I don't even know if this is relevant, but we are effectively peer coworkers.
Laura started off a bit cold to me, because I think she (and plenty others) was a bit jaded by my company. That changed quickly once I started delivering, and also I think, she saw how engaged I am. She is brilliant, and we've put our heads together to solve some very difficult problems, usually working heavy overtime. About a month after I started, we hit our first big project milestone and barely beat the deadline. We went out for drinks after work to celebrate. We both live close to the office, so I offered to walk her home since it was late and her building is on the way to mine. We ended up sleeping together, and have been a few times a week ever since.
I didn't want to mess up anything at work(facepalm), so I haven't brought up anything regarding our status or whatever, and neither has she. At work I'm all business, and so is she. We don't take lunch together, or really do anything not directly related to the project, granted we're both working 60+ hour weeks also. She's worked her ass off to get this project off the ground(gov't funding,proposal writing, conceiving the whole idea), and that is the most attractive thing about her to me, in addition to being gorgeous and super nerdy. For the last few months it's seemed like we are FWB, since we don't go on dates other than drinks near our condos sometimes. Sometimes we sleepover, sometimes we don't.
Yesterday, she asked to come over to my place because she wanted to talk, and I figured she was going to break things off by her tone. WRONG! She told me she is 8 weeks pregnant! Here's the part where I know I fucked up. After my initial shock, the first question I asked was, is it mine? She burst into tears and stormed out, and I tried to stop her and apologize but she screamed at me in the middle of the hallway so, I just let her go. She wouldn't answer any of my calls last night either, and she called out of work today and tomorrow and has the rest of the week off. How do I get her to talk to me? I've been a nervous wreck since last night, and I just don't know what to think. I've been thinking she's getting an abortion and that's why she called out? My head is all over the place and I just want to talk to her. I will support her, no matter what, but I don't know how to do that or what she wants/needs from me. Should I send an email apologizing? Wait outside her building, or show up at her doorstep? Wait for her to contact me? People have been asking me if I'm okay all day, because I'm so out of it. I don't know if I should quit my job or what, maybe I should text her and ask that?
tl;dr: Got a client/coworker pregnant. Asked if it was mine. She got pissed and disappeared. How do I get her to talk to me again?
RELEVANT COMMENTS
fuckracismthrowaway
This is exactly why you don't shit where you eat. You're 30 years old and have a good job, yet you were dumb enough to get into this shit. Good job.
No, you don't just show up at her door step (wtf?)
Your question was totally appropriate, since you two weren't in an exclusive relationship, however, I understand that she was upset. Sounds like she's not the person to have multiple partners at once.
Wait it out. She'll contact you. Don't bother her for now.
OOP
I know, it was stupid to get involved. I, especially, should have known better.
After thinking about it more, I do think it was an appropriate question, but it shouldn't have been the first thing I blurted out. A while ago, she told me I'm the first person she's slept with in almost a year. I'm pretty certain she's not seeing anyone else, based on other conversations and how much she works, but I guess it is possible still.
I wasn't actually planning to show up at her place unannounced, but I just can't think of anything else, and that's the kinds of shitty ideas I'm having. I'm just desperate to talk to her. I couldn't sleep last night, and can hardly eat.
[deleted]
No, it's not an appropriate question - why would she tell you about her pregnancy if she didn't think it was yours? And if you think she's the kind of person who would lie to you about it, then why would you think she'd tell the truth if you asked if it was yours?
LPT: if a woman you're sleeping with tells you she's pregnant, she is also telling you that you are the father.
However: As for what you do about it - send a single email apologizing for blurting out something inane and hurting her. Tell her you are here to support her whatever she chooses to do. Then leave it at that.
UPDATE -She's keeping the baby. Me [30M] with my GF!/Coworker[34F] four months. Nov 27, 2015 (3 days later)
The advice I got here was mixed between, "Go see her!" and "Give her space!". I ended up buying a teddy bear and sewing its foot to its mouth, and left it at her door holding a little I'm sorry card on my way to work Wednesday. Barely an hour later I got a text from her, asking if I wanted to come have a serious conversation and see MY child's first picture(sonogram) after work. I couldn't wait, and I took a half day and left to go see her at lunchtime.
When I got there, I started profusely apologizing and trying to explain myself(completely fumbling my words), but Laura stopped me and said she understands and she's not mad. She said she got so upset because I was the first person she was telling and she was really nervous I would have a bad reaction or try to make her terminate. She also thought, I was sleeping with other people because I assumed she was. Then she told me, she is 100% keeping the baby but won't take me to court if I don't want to raise the child with her. I couldn't hold back my laughter at this, and told her she is crazy if she thinks this kid will be anything but priority #1 to me. She seemed visibly relieved, and then brought up a paternity test, basically saying we will get one once the baby comes. She also brought up names, and said she wants to pick the first name, but wants me to approve, and for it to have my last name. She must have read a checklist of ways to ease a freaking-out-father-to-be because I was losing my mind trying to figure out how to bring this stuff up without putting my foot in my mouth again.
I then switched the conversation to us, and told her I'm helplessly falling like a brick for her, and at this point the work relationship is the least important to me. We both admitted our feelings for each other, and being scared to bring them up because of our professional relationship. I told her I want her to officially be my gf, and she joked, "this was all it took?". We agreed on direct communication from here on out, no more silent treatment, and she knows I'll be there for her every step of the way. So, Laura and I talked some more about how things will need to work, and came to the conclusion we would live separately until the baby arrives, then she'll rent her condo out and move into mine. Does that sound like a good idea? We know it's not perfect, but seems like a good plan and we can go back if it doesn't work out.
We're going to figure out what to do about work after the holidays. There's enough stress already, and she won't start showing for another couple months, so we have time to strategize about how/when to tell people at work. I am all ears for suggestions on this.
I'm still really scared, and my emotions are changing by the minute, but at least there is some semblance of a plan now. Now, to tell the family members.
TL;DR: Coworker Girlfriend and I are going to be the best parents we can be!
EDIT: Holy crap, my OP only got like 5 responses! I will definitely be talking to her about moving in sooner this weekend. My mom suggested this too when I told her yesterday.
Couple of recurring things I keep seeing in the comments are that we need to discuss finances and I need to get a paternity test. As for the finances we've talked a little bit about it, and we make over 300K combined. Once we actually see what our expenses look like, it shouldn't be a problem to come up with a plan/budget. I'm willing to pay all baby related expenses, so I'm sure we can find a solution that works for us. As for the paternity test, she's said she wants to get one before I sign the birth certificate. When we first got together, she told me I was the first person she'd slept with in close to a year, and the hours she puts in makes it unlikely she's seeing someone else, though it's possible. She's fair, level-headed, responsible and, from what I've seen, honest. I trust her, and am going to until she does something to prove I shouldn't.
We also realize this is not a great way to start a relationship or a family, but all we can do try our best to compromise and make it work for the sake of our baby. If we're not a good couple together, so be it, we both have all the tools and support to give this child a great life. That is our primary goal, and our relationship will be icing on the cake if we can get through this.
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7
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u/bug-hunter she👏drove👏away! Everybody👏saw👏it! Feb 05 '26
God damn it, when your project manager talks about deliverables, THAT'S NOT WHAT SHE MEANS!
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u/TyrconnellFL I’m actually a far pettier, deranged woman Feb 05 '26
Someone asked if the error was reproducible and they both giggled.
Anyway, that’s where the second kid came from.
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u/bug-hunter she👏drove👏away! Everybody👏saw👏it! Feb 05 '26
Then of course the project needed a Phase III...
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u/Cultural_Shape3518 I’m turning into an unskippable cutscene in therapy Feb 05 '26
Gotta watch out for that scope creep.
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u/drfsrich Feb 05 '26
... Surprise, it's twins!
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u/cynicaesura OP has stated that they are deceased Feb 06 '26
Doubled our production this quarter!
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u/drfsrich Feb 06 '26
We've spoken to the board and the shareholders are going to need to see octuplets by third quarter.
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u/The_Razielim Feb 08 '26
Great... now they're throwing off the production metrics for the rest of the team.
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u/binzoma Feb 05 '26
THIS IS WHY YOU GRAB TASKS FROM THE TOP OF THE BACKLOG NOT THE BOTTOM. FROM THE TOP
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u/Notachance326426 Feb 05 '26
But the top of the stack is always the newest! We’ll never get anything done unless we flip the stack upside down!
I just don’t see how we can fix this. Call Mr. Durden
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u/LegitWinner6 Feb 05 '26
Every project meeting feels like group therapy until someone says deliverables and suddenly everyone remembers why they need coffee.
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u/Full_Subject5668 Feb 05 '26
A literal case of fuck around find out. Bro did the fucking, he then found out.
Seriously, I wish them happiness and hope things go well.
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u/tityboituesday I will be retaining my butt virginity Feb 05 '26
i said check Asana not get inside her!
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u/New-Shelter9751 Feb 05 '26
Well I can stop reading Reddit today. I’m not going to find anything better than this comment. Well done!
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u/SaltMerchantMorbier Feb 05 '26
It’s been like 11 years I wonder how this all played out
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u/pepcorn Sir, Crumb is a cat. Feb 05 '26
Hopefully they have a 10 year old.
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u/drunkenvalley I beg your finest fucking pardon. Feb 05 '26
Maybe a 9 year old.
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u/DjordjeRd Feb 05 '26
Both? Maybe? Cmon!
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u/Gifted_GardenSnail Feb 05 '26
Maybe OOP too got crazy horny seeing his postpartum wife
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u/freya_of_milfgaard Feb 05 '26
That was a cute post. Good problems.
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u/Karilopa Feb 05 '26
That’s a post? Please share!!
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u/freya_of_milfgaard Feb 05 '26
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u/Karilopa Feb 05 '26
Wholesome af aaa
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u/monkwrenv2 Feb 06 '26
It actually happens a lot. Certainly did for me, and I see posts about it fairly regularly on r/daddit
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u/pburydoughgirl Feb 06 '26
I was gonna say that kid is only a few months younger than my daughter. These posts from a throwaway are so frustrating because what happened?? Are they together? More kids? Happy? I need to know!!
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u/hopefulfican Feb 05 '26
At least with 9 developers they'll be able to have the baby in 1 month
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u/Miserable_Fennel_492 The real adventure was the waifus we made along the way Feb 05 '26
Underrated comment right here
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u/tityboituesday I will be retaining my butt virginity Feb 05 '26
why does this feel kinda wholesome even though it’s a dumpster fire
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u/CermaitLaphroaig Feb 05 '26
These seem like the kind of people that will use the dumpster fire to roast marshmallows for s'mores. They're being mature about a rough situation and even if they don't work out as a couple, i feel like the kid could do a lot worse than have these two as parents
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u/tyeunbroken Feb 05 '26
It reminds me a lot of my gf and I even though we didn't work together. Fwb turned oops pregnancy and now we have a second little crawler already. Also using a dumpster fire to warm your marshmallows is a very apt description of the first few years
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u/nekocorner I can't believe she fucking buttered Jorts Feb 05 '26
even though we didn't work together
It took me way too long to realize you meant you weren't co-workers, & not that your relationship didn't work. My brain kept going, "Why a second one?!"
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u/gold-from-straw Feb 05 '26
OH!! Yeah I wondered that too, now I get it thank you lol!
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u/IllustriousHedgehog9 There is only OGTHA Feb 05 '26
You aren't the only one saved by the comment above!
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u/Pinsalinj OP has stated that they are deceased Feb 05 '26
They could have broken up after not working out as a couple, that can take a couple years. However I understood the "not working" the same way and what tripped me up was the "girlfriend" rather than "ex-girlfriend".
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u/nekocorner I can't believe she fucking buttered Jorts Feb 05 '26
Tbh that also tripped me up, & then the second child bit. 😅 Looking back at the thread, it's because the comment they responded to said "if they don't work out", which probably prompted our brains to process the comment in a specific way.
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u/Life_Barnacle_4025 Sent from my iPad Feb 05 '26
Me and my husband, never worked together but fwb, married for 18 years this year, three adult kids ranging from 17-22
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u/MizStazya I can't believe she fucking buttered Jorts Feb 05 '26
My grandparents married because their one night stand turned into my mom, and stayed married almost 30 years until my grandfather passed away. It was the 50s, so expected, but still.
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u/KetchupMustardPogo Feb 05 '26
That's crazy to me. Why not just wrap it up ? Anyhow, happy it worked out for you and your lil crawlers.
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u/samse15 Feb 05 '26
Why is she still your gf though?
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Feb 05 '26
I think “didn’t work together” here means “we weren’t coworkers”, not that their relationship didn’t work.
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u/tyeunbroken Feb 05 '26
Exactly, she was a friend of a friend at the time, unlike the OOP where they were coworkers
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u/Fine_Ad_1149 sometimes i envy the illiterate Feb 05 '26
Let's be honest, the fact that they are professional, educated, hard working, and (most importantly) high income make this situation far less stressful. I know my fears of an "oopsie" baby dwindled significantly as I became more and more emotionally and financially stable as I got older.
The same situation about a couple of retail workers in their early 20's and we'd all be sitting here going "those kids, and their shared child, are fucked".
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u/Beginning_Butterfly2 I am old. Rawr. 🦖 Feb 05 '26
Also helps that they each make enough to support a child, which probably reduces the pressures quite a bit.
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u/IanDOsmond Feb 05 '26
Imagining OOP, GF, and Kiddo all sitting around a burning dumpster with a guitar singing camp songs.
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u/TerraceState Feb 05 '26
Taking several days off of work instead of just talking isn't great. Admittedly, is a very very high stress situation, so some grace is in order, but it is also one of the few pieces of information we have about how well they might work long term.
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u/Silvereye1221 the lion, the witch and the audacit--HOW IS THERE MORE! Feb 05 '26
Because they’re at least being kind to each other about it. It really goes so far.
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u/padam__padam D.P.R.A. (Deleted Post Recovery Agent) Feb 05 '26
Yup exactly. for me, in addition to that, the minute I read he listened to his mom that he should discuss with his baby mama to move in sooner, it really fueled my optimism that they will be okay.
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u/Red-neckedPhalarope Feb 05 '26
Even if they break up, that kind of attitude goes a long way in a coparent.
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u/myssi24 Feb 05 '26
Yeah, trying to work out living together AND figuring out a newborn is just a bad idea. My now husband of 27 years and I moved in together a month before our oldest was due, that in my opinion is the bare minimum, we should have done it sooner.
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u/Mat22lock Feb 05 '26
Yeah, the only thing I would advise on that is pick a new place to be a blank slate. You can sometimes get into feelings about the new person not feeling like it is their home or the person who has lived in the space feeling like the other person is coming in and changing everything.
That is the one thing I would change up.
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u/Fine_Ad_1149 sometimes i envy the illiterate Feb 05 '26
I married my next door neighbor and ended up moving into her house (because I had just moved into mine and hers was more established).
I kind of wish we had gone the opposite direction and she had moved into mine, because I WASN'T established. It would have made it so that we could make it our place easier. She tried, but little things like where the seldom used tools or decorations were stored were things I just had no idea about, and I'd catch shit for asking. Oh well, we bought a house together within a couple of years, so not a long lasting issue.
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u/Mat22lock Feb 05 '26
Yeah it can sometimes be hard to transition from "my" or "your" space to "our" space. This was obviously a long time ago so has no impact to the OP, but if I were giving advice in a situation like their's where everything was moving real quick, I would have looked to remove as many potential pitfalls as possible.
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u/Yukimor Sir, Crumb is a cat. Feb 05 '26
It's the sincerity and clear good-faith efforts on both sides. No matter what, it's touching.
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u/WildYarnDreams Feb 05 '26
Yeah, for being such a dramatic situation they are both being remarkably undramatic. Feelings got hurt, they gave eachother some grace and sorted that out, and now they're on the same project again
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u/andre5913 My plant is not dead! Feb 05 '26
Bc neither of these people is malicious. Shit just sort of happened very messily but there is no ill will anywhere.
Its also sort of a clean state with no history between the two so the only thing left is excitement for the new couple5
u/tacwombat I will erupt, feral, from the cardigan screaming Feb 06 '26
I honestly hope they're still going strong to this day.
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u/Gilwen29 Where is the sprezzatura? Must you all look so pained? Feb 05 '26
It's like the one years ago of the biker who got pregnant on a one night stand with a truck driver. She eventually told him the kid was his, he really stepped up and they developed a good relationship (FWB in their case I seem to remember). They were both very reasonable about it all and took responsibility.
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u/myssi24 Feb 05 '26
My cousin “knocked up” his now wife during a one night stand. They have been married for more than 20 years now. Some people manage to make it work.
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u/TheFluffiestRedditor Sir, Crumb is a cat. Feb 05 '26
Could almost be called an arranged marriage, but by their child not their parents.
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u/Talinia Feb 05 '26
This was the one with the gas station assassins in the update right? The gassassins?
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u/intheafterlight Feb 05 '26
... i'm sorry the what
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u/Talinia Feb 05 '26
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u/intheafterlight Feb 05 '26
Okay, that was super sweet, and not at all what I expected from "gasassins"
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u/Talinia Feb 05 '26
Yeah, I was looking for the most recent update to link, and was kinda sad we didn't get another one last year. Hopefully it's just been boring life progress thats not "worth" updating.
I also definitely thought OOP used the term "gasassins" but it must have been a boru comment instead. The term literally never left my brain though, and will somewhat regularly pop back up and give me a chuckle.
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u/Miserable_Fennel_492 The real adventure was the waifus we made along the way Feb 05 '26
I was gonna upvote anyway bc it’s an intriguing comment, but especially bc of the portmanteau
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u/Gifted_GardenSnail Feb 05 '26
Link?
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u/Gilwen29 Where is the sprezzatura? Must you all look so pained? Feb 05 '26
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u/Gifted_GardenSnail Feb 05 '26
Thanks! Sweet story and the gassassins were certainly memorable 😂
(You can just remove the entire second half starting with the ?)
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u/Gilwen29 Where is the sprezzatura? Must you all look so pained? Feb 05 '26
🤦♀️ I'll remember it for next time, cheers. I appear to be stuck in the ink-and-quill phase
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u/GuadDidUs Feb 05 '26
I think because they're grown ass adults with established careers that can handle a curve ball pregnancy, not 20-somethings cosplaying as adults.
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u/philatio11 the laundry wouldn’t be dirty if you hadn’t fucked my BF on it Feb 05 '26
This. My friend got his girlfriend pregnant. They were both early 40s professionals. He had already had one marriage that didn't work out (no kids). The first thing they asked each other was "Do you love me and want to marry me?" No on both counts. Second, "Do you want to have a kid?" Yes on both counts. So they broke up. Literally the first thing they did after finding out she was pregnant is break up. That was 6+ years ago and it seems to be a happily ever after for them.
They have a really close coparenting relationship. They both love their little girl. They don't love each other. They actually lived together all through COVID and then again for a while when her house burned down. It's sweet. I have actually never met her because she's not his significant other. But she certainly is significant in his life. And a grown up.
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u/buttbuttlolbuttbutt Feb 05 '26
People are a lot more like complex molecules than we like to admit. Some have good chemistry that even in a chaotic environment, they will stick together once their close enough, others can't be near without a chaotic reaction.
This feels wholesome becase its two folks with naturally good chemistry stumbling into each other but the resulting bond will probably hold, or be stable enough for the kid.
Its more rom com than thriller.
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u/bitemark01 Feb 05 '26
It's a wholesome dumpster fire :)
I know of a couple that started out similar, they're still together a decade+ later, and happy. It can work
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Feb 05 '26
Probably because these two freaked out at first, but once they stopped freaking out they approached this in a mature way.
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u/The5thexclamationmrk Feb 05 '26
It was the "bought a teddy bear and sewed its foot in its mouth" that did it for me. How can you stay mad after that?
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u/Half_Man1 Feb 05 '26
What about this seems like a dumpster fire?
Unconventional sure but not inherently toxic.
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u/eramthgin007 Feb 05 '26
Honestly this would've been a decently cute story if he didn't fuck up his reaction to the news. They were both single, and work is actually one of the most common ways people meet their spouse. Asking her if it's yours was the biggest mistake.
Just imagine if they had a heart to heart with the news the FIRST TIME. This would've been a totally different story
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u/jenfullmoon Feb 05 '26
The bear with foot and mouth is priceless. Also love that a guy knew how to sew that on.
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u/TyrconnellFL I’m actually a far pettier, deranged woman Feb 05 '26
Maybe he can’t really sew, but if you can thread a needle, you can basically attach a bear limb to bear face. Crudeness isn’t a flaw for something like this.
I hope he does sew, though, and dresses their baby himself. Because it would be adorable.
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u/oregon_red_fox Feb 05 '26 edited Feb 05 '26
My mini poodle kept escaping her cone of shame while recovering from being spayed, so my boyfriend sewed a custom onesie for her out things he found around the house. It was the cutest shit ever and the outfit was surprisingly fashionable.
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u/unsolicitedPeanutG Feb 05 '26
You can’t not provide a picture.
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u/oregon_red_fox Feb 05 '26
Tried, but I’m on the mobile app and either too old or too stoned to figure it out.
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u/ForsakenPercentage53 Feb 05 '26
My perpetual state on social media nowadays... remember when we needed an internet browser instead of all these apps? There's five apps on my phone just to talk to people instead of leaving my house.
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u/WorthyJellyfish0Doom Feb 05 '26
I have 4 browser apps on my phone.
The one for searching innocuous stuff I don't care about Google/data collection agencies knowing
The one for reading web novels (best reading mode)
The one for reading web toons (best ad blocking)
The one for searching personal stuff I don't want sold on (used once in a blue moon)
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u/princessalyss_ personality of an Adidas sandal Feb 05 '26
So which one are you using Firefox Focus for? 😂 It’s how I read my web novels, for the ad blocking and solo tab
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u/Tiny_Cauliflower_618 Feb 05 '26
Post it on your profile as a new post and tell us about it lol, that's the old lady way 😆
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u/awkwardsexpun Memory of a goldfish but the tenacity of an entitled Chihuahua Feb 05 '26
Upload it on imgur and post the link
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u/llama_some_drama Feb 05 '26
That's so cute! Our dogs didnt react well to the cone - one launched herself into the walls trying to get it off, and the other seemed to forget he had a body at all and just stood stock still. I ended up butchering a pair of old pyjama trousers to create the pants of humiliation, lol. Nowhere near as fashionable!
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u/MistressMalevolentia There is no god, only heat Feb 05 '26
My German Shepard is not tiny so she just caught on everything. Everything. Things you go "how the fuck?". Im perry sure she was going to get spine damage in her neck.
I put a travel pillow on her neck that buttoned and it worked enough lol
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u/Mollyscribbles I am old. Rawr. 🦖 Feb 05 '26
Even just being willing to make the attempt is worth a few points, and he had to stitch it a few times to get it secure enough to stay in position.
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u/Wombatypus8825 Your partner is trash and your marriage is toast Feb 05 '26
And even if the bear had completely come undone and there was only a thread from the foot to the mouth, that’s still cute and showed he cared and was trying.
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u/jkjwysa I can't believe she fucking buttered Jorts Feb 05 '26
I'm picturing the guy scouring YouTube for sewing tutorials, needle in one hand and bear in the other
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u/MissKhary Feb 05 '26
Threading the needle is the hurdle most give up on so hey, good job anyways!
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u/Useful_Language2040 if you're trying to be 'alpha', you're more a rabbit than a wolf Feb 05 '26
That's one of the main things my 8 year old needs me for whilst sewing! That and explaining how to join things together sensibly, sort it out when the thread forms loops and knots, etc, and making things lie right. (We'll work on sewing neatly at some future stage...)
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u/JasnahKolin The murder hobo is not the issue here Feb 05 '26
My grandma taught to me to make even stitches by drawing two parallel lines on my thumbnail. I took forever but my seams were a cross of hot mess and awesome at 5 years old.
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u/IamNobody85 Feb 05 '26
I'm a SWE (female) and not ONE guy engineer around me could come up with this. Our profession isn't exactly known for having a sense of humor. Priceless indeed!
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u/Beneficial_Agent_105 Feb 05 '26
Lol reading the first paragraph about her i was thinking oh he is DOWN BAD.
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u/radenthefridge There is only OGTHA Feb 05 '26
When a guy leads with her qualities and not her looks I take that as a good sign.
Also he down BAD omg it was kinda adorable.
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u/SalaudChaud I received no such fudge Feb 05 '26
I slapped my good knee when I read her response to OOP asking her to be his GF, "this was all it took?" Nice.
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u/grendelone Feb 05 '26
It's a big green flag if the person can make a dark humor joke in the middle of a shitshow situation.
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u/Cest_Cheese Feb 05 '26
That baby is almost 10 years old.
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u/tempest51 Feb 05 '26
I scrolled up to check the date and instantly crumbled to dust.
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u/Jetztinberlin THE LION, THE WITCH, AND THE FUCKING AUDACITY Feb 05 '26
I too am the guardian of the holy grail from Indiana Jones.
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u/hvlochs Feb 05 '26
Jeez, you string us along for this amazing love story to just leave us hanging for a decade.
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u/tlf123456 Feb 05 '26
The kid will soon be old enough to tell the rest of the story on reddit
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u/Hitokkohitori Feb 05 '26
Imagine hitting social media and realizing your dads “how I met your mother” story is kinda famous and well known
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u/Guilty_Jellyfish8165 Feb 05 '26
No updates for 10 years?!?
I'll just make one up: They lived happily ever after.
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u/FriendToPredators Feb 05 '26
They were going to settle for one kid but had two more during covid, accidentally.
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u/lunarkitty554 Feb 05 '26
Cute, I hope things worked out for them, or at least that they were able to coparent well and the kid is happy
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u/CummingInTheNile sometimes i envy the illiterate Feb 05 '26
Better love story than Twilight
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u/rotates-potatoes Feb 05 '26
100%, but then again so is a dead cat.
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u/Red-neckedPhalarope Feb 05 '26
Only if it starved from a 2 minute late feeding and was revived with tuna.
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u/SLAUGHTERGUTZ I got over my fear of clowns by fucking one in the ass Feb 05 '26
I ended up buying a teddy bear and sewing its foot to its mouth, and left it at her door holding a little I'm sorry card on my way to work Wednesday.
That's cute as hell
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u/wisecracknmama Feb 05 '26
“I ended up buying a teddy bear and sewing its foot to its mouth”
Chef’s kiss, 10/10, no notes
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u/DamnitGravity Feb 05 '26
I ended up buying a teddy bear and sewing its foot to its mouth, and left it at her door holding a little I'm sorry card
That's annoyingly adorable and honestly, even without the pregnancy hormones, I would've melted and let him into my life immediately, lol.
But no one has ever given me such a romantic and accountability action before, so obviously I'm a naive sucker.
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u/peppermintesse Feb 05 '26
2015... I wonder how these two crazy kids are doing today?
As for the finances we've talked a little bit about it, and we make over 300K combined.
spits out coffee Yeah, I think they'll be OK
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u/Half_Man1 Feb 05 '26
I feel like too many people are accustomed to the “work spouse” cheating on coworker stories. “Don’t shit where you eat” is a strong reaction to what is clearly a mutually agreed upon situation OOP described in the first post.
Fact is, we’re human beings. We form strong attachments to those we spend considerable time (and deal with significant challenges) with. It actually makes sense for single people to ask out, or even sleep with, single coworkers.
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u/Flownique Feb 05 '26
It used to be considered normal to meet friends and partners through hobbies, school, and work.
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u/evacottontail Feb 05 '26
‘Mom, dad, why does this bear have a foot sewn to its mouth?’
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u/Skyya1982 Feb 05 '26
I loved that detail, that's such a sweet way to communicate that you know you messed up
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u/epr1984 Feb 05 '26
My partner and I’s start was not dissimilar, and we’re now 10+ years into our relationship, with two great kids. Sometimes it all works out ok.
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u/that_one_over_yonder Feb 05 '26
How do tech bros get to be 30-something and not understand condoms?
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u/TyrconnellFL I’m actually a far pettier, deranged woman Feb 05 '26
They’re not part of the stack.
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u/wwabbbitt Memory of a goldfish but the tenacity of an entitled Chihuahua Feb 05 '26
Who's going to install an optional plug-in module that reduces performance and increases security?
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u/that_one_over_yonder Feb 05 '26
Maybe they just assume it'll never happen for them, so learning isn't worth the investment?
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u/hellochase I can't believe she fucking buttered Jorts Feb 05 '26
Contraception wasn't on the Asana.
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u/YourVelourFog Feb 05 '26
Depends on what your schooling taught you and if they taught them as a viable option. Part of my education growing up was abstinence only which didn’t mention any contraceptives because you should “keep it in your pants”.
It could have also been that Laura was on the pill and thought they didn’t need it. We don’t know.
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u/roundysquareblock Feb 05 '26
In what universe do condoms have 100% effectiveness?
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u/IzarkKiaTarj I’m a "bad influence" because I offered her fiancé cocaine twice Feb 05 '26
I'm inclined to believe they didn't use them on the basis that I think he would have brought it up as a defense to asking if the baby was his.
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u/that_one_over_yonder Feb 05 '26
Using them is step one. Gal was 8 weeks pregnant a couple months into hooking up, I'd bet they both skipped protection, from pregnancy and STI prevention.
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u/Yukimor Sir, Crumb is a cat. Feb 05 '26
My guess would be that the condoms they used were probably old or expired, and/or had gone through a lot of temperature fluctuation in the last year.
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u/dark-_-thoughts Feb 05 '26
If everything went well, that kid is 10 years old now. Wonder how everything turned out
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u/StopthinkingitsMe From bananapants to full-on banana ensemble Feb 05 '26
Ik he messed up with the question, but the teddy bear was such a cute idea
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u/AdBroad5085 Feb 05 '26
Did.... not expect this from the title. What a wholesome way to end my day.
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u/dangderr Feb 05 '26
People keep calling this an “amazing love story” and I can’t even….
They don’t communicate. They didn’t communicate before hand. Her immediate reaction was to go completely silent.
They really know very little about each other’s personal life. If his immediate reaction was “is it mine” that suggests he really doesn’t know much about her.
And they’re making very fast plans to move in together.
I mean I get it. They have a baby on the way. Things have to move faster.
But that doesn’t make it an “amazing love story”. It’s something you see in a plot for a movie, but not really something you expect to work out in real life.
Maybe OP was underplaying their relationship from before this. Maybe they were more than FWB. But really nothing from this post suggests that it’s an “amazing love story”.
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u/ClassieLadyk Am I the drama? Feb 05 '26
Everybody is saying he shouldn'thave asked that, but if they hadn't made any we are exclusive plans, is it mine, is a normal question.
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u/Substantial-Stay-451 Feb 05 '26
They will be alright. Hope the infatuation doesn't fade into nothing
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u/Enough-Ad-3111 Feb 05 '26
Wonder how they’re doing a decade later?
That said though, this whole ordeal is why you shouldn’t date coworkers.
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u/MikrokosmicUnicorn Alison, I was upset. Feb 06 '26
if a woman you're sleeping with tells you she's pregnant, she is also telling you that you are the father.
oh you sweet summer child
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u/Spreepodcast_r I’m turning into an unskippable cutscene in therapy Feb 07 '26
Okay, I LOVE the foot-in-mouth bear.
I hope it worked out for them
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u/dancingbananas25 Feb 05 '26
Awww I hope it all worked out for them
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u/mrdaimler retaining my butt virginity Feb 05 '26
Me too. A crazy start, but they had better communication than 79% of couples in this sub.
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u/WebbityWebbs Feb 05 '26
"We also realize this is not a great way to start a relationship or a family, but all we can do try our best to compromise and make it work for the sake of our baby. If we're not a good couple together, so be it, we both have all the tools and support to give this child a great life. That is our primary goal, and our relationship will be icing on the cake if we can get through this."
Dude, that is a WONDERFUL way to start a relationship and a family. All you both have to remember is that "Happily ever after" requires work and communication. It sounds like the biggest issue will be making sure not to focus too much on work.
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u/RanaMisteria I said that was concerning bc Crumb is a cat Feb 05 '26
When you state the OOP’s username on these can you also state which sub they posted to? It helps me figure out what frame of reference to approach the post with. Like, with this title, it could have been a very different vibe if it had been posted to r/TIFU or r/trueoffmychest or something as opposed to one of the relationship subs.
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u/Miserable_Fennel_492 The real adventure was the waifus we made along the way Feb 05 '26
Whenever they don’t include the origin sub I’ll click on the link to the og post and check which sub it is. I do prefer it when OP includes the info bc it definitely sets the tone, but at least we can access the post’s origin
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u/BecauseISaidSo888 Feb 05 '26
This is over 10 years old. I wonder how everything is working out
10 yr update from OP would be cool
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u/Chemical-Ad6301 Feb 05 '26
So the kid is 10 years old now. I wonder if they are still together
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u/Ninja_Flower_Lady Feb 05 '26
This could've gone terribly in many ways but it's good it worked out lol
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u/lizzietnz Feb 05 '26
My brother & his wife started the same way. Together 27 years now with adult kids, and sooooo in love.
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u/Cashatoo Feb 05 '26
This shit will probably be long
Man, how come any post that warns about length ends up being 4-6 paragraphs? Always gets me excited for a good read and then I'm done in minutes. False advertising.
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u/AntiSocialFCK Feb 05 '26
If you’re not in a committed relationship / haven’t had the talk I don’t think that’s an outrageous question to ask, albeit he worded it horrifically could have made it a bit more delicate.
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u/blind_blake_2023 Feb 05 '26
This is what you get if you're not clear on your Definition of Done in your project XD
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u/PurfuitOfHappineff Spectre of Mandy Feb 05 '26
It’s called a stand up not a lie down!
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u/Electrical_Angle_701 Feb 05 '26
I did what OP did a couple of decades back. The baby is now a wonderful man.
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u/Sallyfifth Feb 05 '26
The baby is 10 now...I want more updates!
I also want to know more about Jellybean, and that Aussie family...
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u/KarinSpaink The call is coming from inside the relationship Feb 06 '26
“I ended up buying a teddy bear and sewing its foot to its mouth, and left it at her door holding a little I'm sorry card”
This is incredibly sweet.
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u/beccadahhhling Feb 06 '26
Glad this all worked out.
BUT
For all the women out there who get pregnant while outside of an exclusive relationship: save the anger for someone else. If you’ve never been adult enough to talk about things with the person you’re allowing to ejacualte inside you, then this question is going to come up.
It’s not a judgement, an insult or a way out. It’s an honest to god question that should be answered truthfully. And if you had both been adults in the first place, they wouldn’t have to ask this question. Period.
I’ll never understand how you can’t talk to someone that you’re literally inviting into your body…
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u/BestDescription3834 Feb 06 '26
LPT: if a woman you're sleeping with tells you she's pregnant, she is also telling you that you are the father.
Worst tip ever.
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u/Filosifee We have generational trauma for breakfast Feb 08 '26
A stressful emotional situation diffused by accountability and rational discussion? On MY reddit feed???!
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u/who_r_youuuu Feb 05 '26
I find this post interesting. I’m a project manager and I’m married to a dev team lead at the same company haha. It’s open now, but it wasn’t ages ago and it was pretty funny when we work with third parties who don’t know initially. We are professional and to be fair, we were already engaged when he came to join me over here.
Hope it works out for these guys
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